Maybe You’ll Love Me When I’m Gone 4r4p61

Maybe You’ll Love Me When I’m Gone

© Copyright 2018 by Neil Jed Castro and ABS-CBN Publishing, Inc.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or any electronic means, including information storage or retrieval systems without permission in writing from ABS-CBN Publishing Inc.

Author Neil Jed Castro Editor Kuiejor Garces, Millie De Vera Creative Director Rainer Montevirgen Illustrator Anna Terrenal Editorial Coordinator Carl Chuidian Editorial Assistant Angel Manalo

President Ernesto L. Lopez Head, Print Publishing Mark J. Yambot Head, Retail Operations Ma. Kristine V. Hernandez

Pre-Press Production Manager Andy Lizardo Digital Imaging Supervisor Gil Cargason

Digital Artist Mark Gregory Casabar Production Coordinator Jouie Mar Doca

Head of Lifestyle Ecosystem Paolo M. Pineda Sr. Finance Officer-Narrowcast Myca G. Ramos Finance Manager Rowena Dote Finance Analyst Camille Batongbakal

Published by

8F ELJCC Building Mother Ignacia St. cor. Eugenio Lopez Drive Quezon City, Philippines

This is about someone who never gave up on love and life…

And this is her story…

She is the girl whose world is starting to cave in.

She was once a happy girl—carefree and free-spirited. She used to flash an everready sweet smile. She had dreams—big dreams—but she did not realize that the world is bigger and quite scary.

Everything changed when she sensed rejections from people… when they started to judge her. After all the things they did to her, she could never be the same girl anymore…

She is the girl who has been battling depression.

She now questions her worth—no thanks to those worthless people who took her for granted. She feels bad about herself. Her dreams seem to have died, and now, she feels like her very existence is a disaster. She feels that she’s such a big failure. She has been losing interest in all the things that she loved doing before. When people ask her how she feels, she simply cannot articulate her feelings. She cannot describe the turbulence she feels inside. She is now a sad girl… a very sad and insecure girl—someone who needs validation from people. She badly needs to be accepted by those around her. What’s more, she has learned how to fake her emotions.

She will tell you that she is okay. She will even flash a smile, but deep inside, she is breaking into pieces. She wants to shout, but nothing comes out of her mouth other than sighs of desperation. She wants to shout as loud as possible so people will know that she is struggling, but her voice simply refuses to cooperate. She feels that everything she does is pointless. She thinks that she is living a purposeless life. Her mind is clouded with doubts and what ifs.

People would often tell her to be happy and let go of negative thoughts. They would tell her to move forward and stop being dramatic. But what they fail to realize is that she is trying so hard to be happy. She is doing her best to forget her worries, but sometimes, it is way too hard to fight against her own thoughts. It is way too hard to fight the feeling of emptiness that gets heavier and heavier each day. She feels lonely and her sadness gets darker every day. She gets slowly consumed inside every single day.

Her enemy gets worse at night. She hates the deafening silence. She can hardly sleep at night. She is continually bothered by her own thoughts. She wakes up in the middle of the night with cold hands and sweaty feet. She hears her thoughts

racing. When morning comes, she feels the need to sleep again. She feels tired of everything.

She is tired of people showing her fake love and fake friendship. She has grown sick and tired of those people who often tell her that they will be there for her, but cannot be found when she needs them the most.

She is tired of fake friends who show up only when they need something from her. Those people whom she expects from are the ones pulling her down.

She is tired of people who judge her without knowing the real story…those who know nothing about her struggles and her vulnerabilities in life.

She is losing focus. The future is too uncertain for her. She gets too indecisive. She cannot compose her thoughts very well. She has dark thoughts in mind that cloud any zest for life. As a matter of fact, she now hates life so much…enough to want to end it. Suicide? Yes, that to her is a very tempting thought! The thought of killing herself as a solution to end all of her sufferings has now and then been invading her mind.

She has a lot of “maybes”…

“Maybe you’ll start caring when I am gone…”

“Maybe you’ll start seeing my worth when I am lying in the coffin…”

“Maybe you’ll start loving me when I cannot say a word anymore…”

“Maybe you’ll start accepting me when I am dead…”

“Maybe I will start hearing good words from people when I can no longer reciprocate…”

“Maybe I’m better off dead…”

She wants to end her life, but she cries for help, too, deep inside. (It must be the survival instinct natural among humans.) Actually, she wants people to know that she is not just overacting. They should understand that it is not her choice to be this way. She is fighting her demons every single day.

Do you know her? Really know her? Ah! But you only know her superficially. You don’t know a thing about what she has been through and about what has been ailing her each day.

For every judgment you hurl at her, you choke any chance of her ever opening up to you. You are only adding to the burden that has been weighing her down. If she could only buy happiness, she would! Unfortunately, that wouldn’t be possible.

She does not need much. She only needs people to make her feel that she matters. She only wants to feel that you want her company. She just wants you to embrace who she is—flaws and all! She wants to feel valued, because for so long, she had been treated like dirt.

She is the perfect definition of ironic.

She is good at loving, but she always feels unloved–taken for granted. When she loves, she gives her all so she will not end up with regrets. She loves fiercely and is willing to take the risks. She is willing to do everything just to make the relationship work and make the person stay. She is the perfect definition of someone who loves selflessly.

She’ll stick it out in a relationship. She keeps holding on no matter how tough the journey gets. She holds on to promises. She does not give up even if she is the only one fighting to keep the relationship—even up to that point that she gets to stoop too low. She may even drop to her knees for her beloved to stay. She does not care about looking stupid. That is how brave she is in love.

She loves genuinely but her love is never reciprocated. Sometimes, she questions herself: “Is there is something wrong with me?”

Loser! She feels bad for being always, always dumped despite all her efforts to love hard and give her best.

She ends up always asking: “How could he have sounded so sincere in his promises when all along he could have just been taking me for a ride?”

And then, she ends up hurting because she had invested too much.

She is the girl with a big heart.

She apologizes even if it is not her fault. She always ends up as the one willing to give more…to sacrifice. She always sees the good side in you. She forgives you even if you do not deserve it. She forgives without waiting for you to apologize. She does not nurse grudges.

She has a big heart. A heart that is brave, patient, and hardworking. A heart that almost always end up getting hurt.

She gives multiple chances even before you ask for it—without hesitation that she will end up broken again. She gives chances because she knows that you will change. She does not lose hope at all that you will soon be that good person that you naturally are.

She is the girl who has a lot of questions.

“When will I be truly happy?”

“Will someone be willing to accept and love me for who I am?”

“Am I not good enough?”

“Why did you leave me?”

Her mind is clouded with questions that need answers.

She has a lot of “what ifs” at this very moment.

She is the girl who constantly feels sorry.

She feels sorry for not being the best girl. She feels like she is not beautiful enough. She feels like she is way too replaceable. She can’t help but wish to be someone else.

She feels sorry for loving too much. She feels sorry for expecting too much…for thinking that people will do the same for her. She feels sorry for thinking that other people have the same heart as hers.

She feels sorry for being too kind. People tend to abuse her kindness. They think that she’d always settle for mediocrity.

She feels sorry for being too “low maintenance”. People think that she will just settle for second-rate efforts. They think that she is okay with being treated like garbage.

She feels sorry for questioning her worth. She hopes to wake up from her agonized state. Now, it has crossed her mind that no one is actually worthy of her.

She feels sorry for chasing love and begging for affection. She feels sorry for herself because she knows that she deserves the best.

She feels sorry for wallowing in persistent sadness. She tends to be emotional

and she thinks and worries too much.

She feels sorry for allowing herself to be hurt and be broken by people who do not deserve her love.

She is the girl who thinks and worries too much.

She thinks she is not good enough. She had been cheated on despite how she poured out everything that she could give. She feels so bad about these. She is afraid to open up and care for someone again because what happened in the past is holding her back. She does not want to feel the horrible feeling she felt before.

She is afraid to be attached easily because people’s feelings nowadays are temporary. They will tell you they love you, but the next thing you know, they are already gone. She does not want to be a victim of lies and promises again.

She is scared to trust anyone because she does not want to end up broken and hurting just like before. Enough is enough! She has been through a lot. She has a lot of doubts in her head. She doubts your love. She will push you away. It will never be easy for her to do that. It is just that she does not want to expect too much anymore.

She fears that one day, you will turn out to be just like them. She has heard all kinds of lies and sweet promises. She has heard the worst. She is tired of fake love. She is tired of being just an option.

She thinks and worries too much because you are giving her reasons to. You make her feel that she is not enough. She will turn cold and heartless. She is trying really. She is…

She is an insecure girl.

She feels that other girls are better than her in all aspects. She feels that she is not pretty enough. She does not like how she looks. She does not like her nose, skin, and everything about her. When she looks at the mirror, she does not like the reflection she sees. She does not like every bit of her countenance and existence. If only she could live a different life, she would.

She is an emotional girl.

She is often called overly sensitive because she gets emotional so easily. People have no idea about the things she had been through which made her who she is today. She holds back her tears, but when no one is watching, she becomes too vulnerable. She hides under a mask, trying to fake her real feelings.

She would say that she is fine, but people just do not know how wounded she is. She is in deep pain. She is so broken.

She would not like to show her weakness, because she does not want people to have pity on her. She does not want to bother other people. She wants people to see that she is strong. She wants to project that she can withstand anything.

She is the girl who constantly fakes a smile.

She pretends to be tough, but deep inside, she is way too fragile. She would say that she does not expect too much from someone, but deep inside, she wants to be cared for so badly. She wants people to make efforts for her, too. She wants people to take care of her, too. But she constantly feels her heart breaking… again and again and again. She is not the same girl anymore, and this saddens her.

She hopes her ordeal will be over soon. She hopes that she can experience peace of mind again… just like before… too long ago. She hopes that she can finally move on.

She is a sad girl.

Many things are making her sad. She is sad about gossips about her which are not true. She regrets having opened up to the wrong people. She is sad about people making her feel special for a short while, then, soon dropping her just like that. She is sad about people judging her past and her mistakes. She has already learned her lessons.

She is sad because the next one who will love her might not accept her for who she is. It saddens her that she has been broken multiple times. She is sad about a lot of things in her life. She has regrets. She has fears. She surely made wrong decisions in her life. But she knows that her light will shine again. She cannot wait for the better days to come.

She is the girl who has been left hanging.

She fell for the promises.

She got attached easily.

She invested a part of herself.

She has a lot of whys.

She wants to find answers.

She hopes that she will be given a closure.

She hopes to finally move on.

She hopes to be able to start over

And relish sweet love minus the hurt.

She is the girl who has trust issues.

But do you know that she’ll surely doubt your intentions, and at some point, she will reject your love? She will not trust you easily because she learned her lessons the hard way. She realizes that one cannot trust anyone except his or her own self. She will be one of the hardest girls to love. She is not paranoid. It is just that her past shaped her to be this way.

She is the girl who has been cheated on.

She does not deserve all the pains and sufferings because all that she has done was to be faithful and to love really hard. She does not keep records of wrongs. She does not bring up issues anymore because she wants peace.

She always makes sure that she s you all the way. She constantly makes you feel wanted and loved. She always lifts up your spirit when you are down. She genuinely cares for you, because deep down, she hopes that it would be you and her until the end. But what did you do? You cheated on her… again. You broke her heart and tore her apart.

She is the girl who chases love.

She is draining her self-worth.

She seeks someone’s attention and love.

She desperately wants someone to be a part of her life.

She is the girl who is afraid to love again.

She is somehow tired of love. Every time she falls in love, she always ends up broken and hurting. She always makes sure she treats her man right, but then, she always ends up to be the girl who was never good enough. She always ends up disappointed, because every time she opens up to someone, she tends to be left out in the process.

She has been so scared of yet one more chance for one to be a part of her life. She cannot be blamed for being skeptical. She now finds it hard to believe in love after all she had gone through. She just feels like love is not for her.

She is the girl left far behind, still struggling to be successful.

She is really having a hard time in keeping up with her life. She finds it difficult to comprehend with her constant struggles over these thoughts:

Other girls her age already have a very stable high-paying job.

Others already have successful businesses.

Others already own a car.

Others have a stable family.

…while she is still trying to figure out what she really wants in life.

…while she keeps on hopping from one company to the other.

…while she is still figuring out who she really is, and is yet unsure of what she will become in the future.

She is the girl who feels love’s pressure.

People always ask why at her age, she has not yet settled down for good. Every time she attends a family gathering, relatives would ask why she’s not married yet. Their line of questioning pushes her in one corner, and makes her feel like there is something wrong with her since nobody seems to like her enough to want to marry her.

She is the girl who has been bullied.

People make fun of her. They say nasty things about her. They laugh about her imperfections and past indiscretions. They mock her for not being an ideal girl. She does not fit society’s standards of beauty and acceptability. All these have been her constant struggles.

No one seems to want being friends with her. She feels like she is a piece of a puzzle that does not fit no matter how hard she tries to.

She is the girl who does not need much.

She does not need material things from you. She can finance herself. She only needs affection, genuine love, fidelity, and respect. She does not need expensive dates to make her feel special. You do not even need to see her every single day. Nor do you need to daily send her chocolates and flowers.

Even a call or a simple text asking how her day went would mean a lot to her. She only needs you to make her your priority. She does not need your apologies; she needs real, sincere efforts. She only craves for your attention. She just needs little things to make her happy. She needs you to love her the way she deserves to be loved.

She is a work in progress.

She works so hard for her dreams.

She made mistakes but has learned from them.

She is an imperfect person as any human is imperfect.

She is capable of hurting other people, too.

She knows that being a better person is a constant battle.

And she knows that what her heart’s desires shall soon be granted.

She is the girl who tries to save everyone.

She tries to save everyone from sadness, but no one cheers her up when she is down. She does her best to be there for other people, but no one lends a hand when she is in need. She is willing to listen to everyone who needs her, but sadly, no one seems to lend an ear when she needs one.

She makes everyone laugh, and takes away their worries, yet no one seems to be there for her when she needs someone to cheer her up. She makes an effort to be ive to everyone, but no one seems to her in anything. She can only hope that someone would do the same for her, too.

She is the girl who struggled with being an adult.

Even before she finished her studies, she was already excited to fulfill her dreams. She had a clear vision of what the future would be for herself and for her family. She wanted to give back for all the sacrifices they made for her. She wanted to take care of them.

But when she landed a job, she realized that being an adult is never easy. She worked so hard to finish her degree, yet she landed such a low-paying job with a salary that’s never enough to settle her bills. She got a real taste of how it feels to work in an industry. Work could really be toxic and suffocating. From the people who wanted to get ahead of her—politics in the workplace—to the toxic people around, work life could really be so stressful. It could be so draining.

She’d sleep late at night and wake up early for the daily grind. Sometimes, she would even forget how to breathe. She surely got to understand that being an adult is never an easy thing. She has to deal with life’s pressures and with people’s expectations and idiosyncrasies.

She is the girl who lost herself in the process of loving someone.

She tried changing herself just to be someone’s ideal partner. She tried changing the way she looks. She tried to change the way she speaks. She tried changing herself just so she will be loved. She tried hiding her imperfections just to be accepted.

She lost her identity just to be loved.

She is the girl who finds comfort in alcohol.

People call her a “wasted bitch”.

People tag her as a failure.

What they do not know is that she only wants to forget about the pain temporarily. She wants to find escape from all the things going on in her life. She wants to be happy even just temporarily. She does not want to hear judgments even just for a short while. If only she can vomit all the things that have been bothering her, then she will surely do it. Unfortunately, she cannot. The moment she wakes up, she is back to her old self again.

She is a single mom.

People have been judging her all her life because she got pregnant at a young age. They think that she had ruined her future. They think that she will never be a good mom.

She took in all the judgments and strived to be a better version of herself. She regretted some of the decisions she made in the past, but she never regretted having a child.

Her child made her a stronger version of herself. She became more responsible and mature in life. She became more driven to live. She found her reason to do well in life. She will never trade her kid for anything.

She is certainly not giving up on love, but for now, that is not her priority. Life is hard because she was deprived of the that she and her child deserve, but she keeps fighting. She’s a fighter.

She is the mom who will do everything.

She is tireless and selfless, especially since she now takes care of not just one child, but two. She will even take the bullet for her children.

She loves unconditionally. She is the perfect definition of a real-life superhero. She takes care of her children every day. Her love for them is immeasurable. Her sacrifices seem endless, but she never complains, because she loves them.

She just wants you to know that when you feel down, she will always be there. When you feel like you are in doubt, always that she is your greatest er. She will always believe in your abilities. When you feel like you are not enough, she will always remind you that you are more than enough. When you feel like everyone is leaving, always that she will always stay. She will always be your best confidante. She accepts you for who you are. She accepts you without judgments.

And when the time comes that she will no longer be strong, she will need your loving care. When she keeps on asking repetitive questions, she wants you to understand her. She is not getting any younger anymore. Please take care of her.

She is the girl who has been through a lot.

She has been through a lot of struggles.

She has been through a lot of heartaches.

She has endured a lot of pains.

But she has remained strong. It took her great effort and time

to be who she is now...

It took maturity and self-love.

It took self-acceptance.

She is now the girl who is slowly overcoming depression.

Little by little, she is opening up.

She has sought clinical help.

She is slowly seeing her worth.

She has realized that life matters, and that there are a lot of things in store for her up ahead.

She’s thankful for her family and real friends who stood by her during one of the hardest battles in her life. Their love and comion kept her going. She can now slowly smile without the need to fake it. Her life’s baggage is getting lighter. Her eyes are slowly regaining their sparkle. Her battle is not yet over, however, but she cannot wait to feel better.

She is now the girl who finally knows her worth.

She will not beg anymore for someone to become a part of her life. She now understands the fact that she cannot force love. She realizes that she does not need someone to know her worth. She does not need a king in her castle for her to feel secure.

She would rather be single than be with someone who does not treat her right. He does not need someone who treats her like she is just a piece of garbage. Just because she is alone does not mean that she is lonely. She is finally able to embrace her individuality. She finally loves herself. For so long, she had been prioritizing others. She had been doing her best to make others happy.

This time around, she will focus on herself. She will promise not to settle for less anymore. She will not settle for fake love. She will not settle for temporary attachment. She will not settle for being an option. She will never settle for someone who is only there during her sunny days and is suddenly gone when everything gets rough.

She knows that she deserves all the happiness life can give and that happiness should dwell inside her; it should not be dependent on someone.

She will start pampering herself this time. She now knows she deserves it. She has finally arrived at the point where she has realized the things that she should not tolerate, which she had kept on ignoring for so long.

She is now the girl who cares less about what people think of her.

No amount of negativity can now bring her down.

She does not care about other people’s opinions about her.

She knows herself better than anybody else. Their opinions won’t shape her. She will never try to please anyone anymore. She does not care if they won’t like her. She is not born into this world to get people’s approval. She knows the better truth and she will not beg them to believe in her.

She is unapologetic for who she is. Love her or hate her—it really does not matter. She knows that she is finally on the right track in life.

She accepts criticisms because some of them are essential for her growth, but some need to be ignored for good reasons.

She will not break her heart anymore for someone who will not do the same for her.

She is now the girl who embraces herself.

She now loves her own imperfections. She does not think anymore that she is different. She knows that she is her own kind of beautiful. She might not be the most beautiful girl, but she knows that she can offer something to the table. She knows that she is born with a greater purpose. She knows that she already won the moment she was born.

She might not have the most pointed nose, but she is beautiful. She might not have the fairest skin, but she is beautiful. She might not be blessed with a sexy body, but she is beautiful.

She knows that beauty is more than what the eyes can see. Real beauty is more than just a stamp of validation; it is more than just for people’s acceptance. It is more than just conforming to what the majority does just to fit in. It is more than just getting thousands of likes in a selfie on social media.

She does not feel insecure around other girls anymore. She does not see other girls as threats. She does not compete with anyone but herself. She strives hard to be a better and better person.

She is not afraid to show her scars anymore because they are proofs of how strong she has become. They are proofs of the battles she has won in life.

She can now confidently flaunt what she is… what she has. She does not care about what other people will say. She is just being herself anyway.

She is now the girl with no regrets.

Pain had made her stronger. Heartbreaks had given her so much to learn. All the failures and bad decisions she made had shaped her to be a better person…a better woman.

She has no regrets about having loved someone who chose not to keep her. She has no regrets about having loved someone who only gave her temporary happiness. She keeps no grudges or bitterness. She is simply thankful about realizing that she deserves better.

She deserves someone who is not perfect, but will stay with her through thick and thin.

…someone who will make real efforts for her.

…someone who stays with her no matter how tough the journey gets.

…someone who accepts the real her.

…someone who accepts her dark past.

…someone who is proud of her.

…someone who wholeheartedly accepts all her imperfections.

…someone who never judges her and would influence her to be a better person.

She deserves someone who sees her sadness and madness. Someone who lifts her up during her darkest days. Someone who s her dreams and goals in life.

She deserves someone who gives her respect. Someone who has goals and dreams in life, too. Someone who creates new dreams with her.

She deserves someone who also sees her worth.

…someone who treats her right.

…someone who never makes her feel less of a woman.

…someone who does not make her feel that she lacks something.

She deserves someone who is not just good with sweet words and promises but also in actions. Someone who is responsible in life.

She deserves someone who craves to have real connection and conversation with her.

She deserves someone who does not ignore her emotional breakdowns. Someone who does not just call her dramatic when she is about to open up about something.

She deserves someone who makes her feel at home.

…someone who makes her feel secure and safe.

…someone who does not give her reasons to be insecure about herself.

She deserves someone who notices every detail about her. Someone who is also a work in progress, but is willing to do sacrifices for her.

One thing is for sure: She might have lapses, but she will do all of the above for him.

She is now the girl who does not rush to be in love.

She learned her lessons the hard way.

She will not rush to be in love again anymore, because the more she does, the more she will end up broken, disappointed, and upset. She knows that true love waits. The more she rushes, the more chances she will just end up with the wrong person.

She will surely take her time for another chance to be in love.

She is now the girl who has a deeper understanding of success.

She does not pressure herself anymore. She has stopped comparing herself to anyone. She knows that she has a different journey to take. She has different struggles to overcome and she is her own person. She does not define success with money, position, fame, or even material things anymore.

Success for her is more of having peace of mind. It is having a great relationship with the people around her. It is having a good heart to help those in need, and being a light to someone who is in total darkness. It is about lifting up other people and exuding positivity in this world. It is about being a catalyst for change. And that change that she wishes for the world starts within her.

She is not afraid to fail anymore. She fully embraces the idea that every failure has a reason. She is not afraid to stand up and rise again every time she fails. There might be delays in her journey, but one thing is sure: she is bound for great things.

She is happy about other people’s success. She finds it fulfilling seeing other people pursue their ion. She has no space for bitterness, envy, and hatred in her heart because she is happy, fulfilled, and contented.

She is now the girl who is slowly moving on.

What she has been through was not easy. It was one hell of a ride!

It was lonely.

She cried multiple times.

Her heart got shattered into pieces.

She does not want to go back to those times when she thought she was already okay, but after a while, she would feel sad and cry again. She would not want to go back to the time that she felt hopeless and desperate. She does not want to go back to those days that she felt like her worth was at an all-time low.

She was so brave for having found the nerve to free herself from the person who had caused her pain. She is now free from a toxic relationship that had been slowly consuming her. She is now free from questioning her worth. She knows that she is worth fighting for.

She has no hurt feelings anymore. She does not hate you. She already has the maturity in her to accept that some people are not really meant for each other. She has forgiven you even if you didn’t apologize. She cannot wait to start over and be free from pain this time. She would rather chase her dreams and adventures than people.

Her pain shaped her to be a better version of herself. It made her kinder and forgiving. It taught her to never take advantage of other people. It taught her to be more selfless.

She had already accepted everything. She knows that everything happened for what are to be greater things. She knows that things are about to turn for the better.

She is now the stronger version of herself.

She is wiser. Her life is far from perfect, but she is surely happy. She has fully grown to be a woman who loves every bit of herself. She now has a full sense of maturity.

She accepts that sometimes, it is okay not to be okay. It is okay to cry. It does not make you weak at all. It only shows how human you are.

She accepts that her love is not always reciprocated…that some people are not ready with the intensity of love that she can give.

She is now the girl who does not let people’s expectations define who she is.

She does not let people box her to be someone who she is not.

No one can cage her individuality. She’s the girl who does not wear girly clothes. She is the girl who does not wear makeup.

She would prefer sneakers over heels. She prefers to be with boys than girls to avoid drama, but this does not make her an easy girl, and it does not make her less of a woman.

She is the girl who did not take revenge.

No matter how heavy the emotional baggage she is carrying gets, and despite the torrent of hurting words hurled at her, she still finds a spot in her heart not to ever do the same thing. What she does instead is to pray for those who had hurt her. She prays for their well-being. She prays for their peace of mind. She prays for their happiness, too.

She is now the girl who stood up against people who tried to bring her down.

There is a warrior spirit within her. No one can break her spirit. She will do whatever she likes doing for as long as she is not stepping on anyone… as long as she is not hurting anybody.

No opinion whatsoever can hurt her anymore. When she wears sexy clothes, it does not give anyone the reason to disrespect her. She is definitely not inviting anyone to abuse her. If you cannot deal with her as she embraces her sexuality, the problem is with you and not with her. She is not trying to impress anyone. She does not seek attention.

No one has the right to tell her what she needs to do with her body. It is her choice.

She will wear makeup whenever she likes. She will eat whatever she likes to eat.

No matter what body size she has, she is still beautiful.

And finally, she is the girl who finally found her one true love.

She had almost stopped believing in love. Cliché as it may sound, she does not want any heartbreak anymore. But someone made her fall in love again...

She met you in those times that she felt like giving up and everything was far from being magical.

She met you during those times that she was so down and hopeless.

She met you during those times that she was in deep pain.

She met you during those times that her heart was broken into pieces.

She met you during those times that she was so upset with herself…when nothing was smooth sailing…when everything was imperfect…when nothing seemed to get any better.

She tried to push you away but you stayed.

She doubted your intentions but you proved her wrong.

She could not be more thankful that you stayed.

When she felt like giving up, you stood by her. You showed her the brighter side of things. You showed her that there is more to life.

When she felt down and hopeless, you cheered her up. You made her feel that there would always be hope.

When she was in deep pain, you listened to her. You did not ignore her sentiments no matter how repetitive they were. You are with her in her journey to recovery.

When her heart was breaking into pieces, you did not force her to be okay. You gave her time to heal.

When she was so upset about herself, you gave her reassurance. You made her feel that her flaws were never an issue at all.

When everything was rough, you did not let go of her hands. You held them so tightly. You did not give up on her even if it was no longer convenient.

When everything seemed imperfect, you embraced her, together with her imperfections. You continually made efforts to make her feel that her imperfections do not diminish her worth.

When everything seemed not to get any better, you gave her greater strength to carry on. You encouraged her to give life a good fight. You gave her more reasons to maintain a positive attitude towards life.

When she did not want to start over in life anymore, you guided her. You showed care, love, and understanding. When she had too much going on inside, you respected her pains and sufferings.

When she had too many worries, you took them away. You made sure that brighter days were just around the corner. You made her sure that pain was just temporary—that there would always be a rainbow after the rain. You made her feel that she was never alone in her battle.

When she was struggling to be herself, you did not change her. You did not change her just to be accepted by everyone. You accepted everything about her.

You have proven to her that you are different and your love is real.

You saw the wholeness when she was broken.

You saw her beauty when she felt ugly.

You saw her purpose when she felt lost.

You gave her the kind of love that she deserves. You gave her the kind of love that she has been longing for.

This journey will never be easy, but she will stay with you. She will be with you in your failures and triumphs.

And when you feel that the world is giving up on you, she will definitely stay.

She could not be more thankful that you were able to deal with her darkest side.

She could not be more thankful that you continually chose her every single day.

She is filled with so much happiness because she knows that she will never be the best girl around, but you love her ionately.

She is so happy that you came into her life. It all makes sense now why it did not work out with anyone in the past.

You are her answered prayer: The one she had been praying for.

She is not expecting too much from you. She knows that you will never be perfect, and she knows that you have bad days, too. She knows that you also have insecurities and fears. Do not worry because she will stay with you no matter what. She will be as patient as you are. She will be as strong as you are.

You will both withstand the struggles and hardships. She only hopes that you will still choose her even after your heart’s racing heartbeat and the butterflies in your tummies when you are near her are gone. She hopes that you will still choose her even if the sparks are gone. She hopes that you will still love her when she is no longer beautiful.

There will never be a perfect relationship for sure. There will be fights and misunderstandings. After all, love is not just about hugs and kisses. It is also about being able to fight for each other when the world is against the both of you.

She does not know what lies ahead, but she is hoping that you will still be there while she is fulfilling her dreams.

She does not know what the future holds, but she will still choose you over and over again.

People even ask her why she chose you. She chose you for no specific reason. Her heart chose you effortlessly.

LOVE MUSINGS

Never be content with just being an option. Never chase people. If they really love you, they will make efforts just to be with you. Nobody is busy all the time, if you are important they’ll find ways to connect with you. Love someone who does not give you lame excuses.

Love someone who makes you blush with words but makes you fall in love more with actions. Love someone who makes you happy. Someone who accepts your ugliest flaws without any hesitation.

How does it feel to be loved by someone who makes efforts, just to be with you?

You are his priority. You do not beg for time just for you to be together. No matter how hectic your schedules are, you always find time to bond.

You feel that you are important. He never makes you feel that you are a burden in whatever he is doing.

It is not a matter of fancy things given to you as gifts, but more on little things that have big impact on your life. He tries to make you laugh with his silly jokes. He tries to sing even if it’s out of tune. He writes poems and letters for you. You just feel that your existence is valued so much.

A person who does his best to make you happy is a person to keep. Someone who cheers you up during your gloomy days. Someone who sticks with you no matter how rough the road gets. If you have that someone, cherish that person.

How does it feel to be totally over with someone?

It’s such a liberating feeling when your relationship is totally over with a toxic person. You can openly express how you feel. His presence no longer makes you feel awkward nor make you feel bitter.

As you totally let go of that relationship, you begin to feel genuine happiness. You do not get affected anymore. You only wish real happiness for that person, too.

Why do loyal people get cheated on?

It is all because they have so much to give. They love unconditionally and they care so much. They get cheated on because it’s a wake up call in disguise. God will not allow them to end up with jerks. He knows they deserve so much better.

So, if you get cheated on, do not feel sad. Do not blame yourself. It is not your loss anyway. It only means you’re one step closer to finding the “right one”.

Never stop believing in love.

A broken heart is a reminder that you deserve someone better.

Soon enough, you will get the love that you prayed for.

Never allow yourself to be treated like you are nothing.

At some point in our lives, we come to realize how stupid we become when we are in love. We tend to make efforts to let someone know and feel our existence. We try to change who we are for them to like us. We try to make ourselves look good for someone. We try to do the first move in communicating with that person, but sadly, our love and efforts never get reciprocated.

But never be ashamed about having done all these things. We really do crazy things just to be with someone. At some point, we become so desperate.

It was a good thing that we managed to start waking up from reality. It certainly hurts at first. Breaking up and then deciding to move on are truly painful. But the earlier we start to realize that we deserve someone better, the earlier we get to reap the rewards of our smart decision. After all, we should never have allowed ourselves to be treated like nothing.

As we started to realize our worth as human beings, we woke up to the reality that there is more to life than being the loser in a one-sided love.

I love you but I understand that we are not meant to be.

When you came into my life, you painted many colors into it. You cheered me up during my darkest times. You gave me so many reasons to be happy. You are one of the reasons why I get excited with life.

But I understand that some things are not meant to last. Some things are not really meant to be no matter how hard we push and hang on. There are really times that no matter how hard we work for something, it is not destined to happen, and so, it will never happen.

But I do not have regrets. It was a wonderful journey. I learned a lot from it. You have become a part of me, momentarily. We might be on separate journeys now, but I still care for you.

Are second chances worth it?

Second chances are deserved only by people who have learned their lessons… those who are determined to correct their mistakes. They are for those who are truly serious in becoming better as persons…those who have already realized their self-worth and have learned how to preserve it.

But expect trust issues along the way. You cannot lay all the blame on that someone who was once a part of your life all because of what you did or what you did not do before.

If you are able to get that second chance, get ahold of it. Both parties realize and resolve early on to treat each other better the second time around. They must double their efforts to nurture and keep the relationship.

Second chances are for the fearless and the risk takers…those who are brave enough to give a failed relationship another try.

Not all second chances end up being failures. In fact, there are a lot of couples whose relationship had become stronger than ever. They had come to realize that they could not stand losing each other, hence when they get back together, they’d stay even tighter than before.

Same person. Same feelings.

It is still you and will always be you. I will still choose you with no ifs and buts. I will still choose you without hesitation. It will always be you in a heartbeat.

I thought that I was over my feelings for you. I tried to conceal what I felt inside as I tried to convince myself that I am over you. But no…I am just fooling myself.

How can you forget someone who gave you so much to ?

…someone who made you feel special in a lot of ways.

…someone who brought a smile into your life.

…someone who once told you that there was only you.

But I am already on the road to healing myself. I have slowly accepted everything. I just need time to really move on. It might not be today, tomorrow, or the next day. Only time will tell.

I can hardly wait for that day when you will just be a memory and a learning experience. It will never be the same without you, but I will be okay.

To the one that got away:

It has been awhile now since the last time I saw you. It has been months since I last held your hands. What pains me most is the thought that I have lost you forever.

We shared a lot of fun and laughter. The memories of how we enjoyed our time together are still fresh in my mind.

Our relationship was surely not perfect. It was a roller-coaster ride. But though it was far from perfection, we were so happy. And so, when you decided to end our relationship, it was so hard for me to understand. It was quick. I did not see it coming, and I would never understand why.

When we first met, I also did not expect you to become part of my life. I never really realized how much I love you until you were gone. It pains me until now that things did not work out between us.

We failed to defy the odds that came our way. We failed to sustain our happy moments. And now, it hurts so bad knowing that you will never be mine again.

I couldn’t help but ask some questions. “Had we held on just a bit longer, could we have been okay?”

“If we had tried to work it out, would we still be happy today?”

But then, at the end of the day, these thoughts are never going to change a thing. I have regrets, I it. Until now, I am still trying to live without you. Without my best friend.

I’d like to think that someday, our paths would cross again. Maybe someday, you’d change your mind.

Please know that I miss you, and I still love you. You will always have a special place in my heart. Until we meet again...

You are too young to be stressed about love.

You are too young to lose sleep over someone who does not really understand love. You are too young to be brokenhearted.

There is so much more to life than being in a relationship. Reach out for your dreams. Finish your studies. Travel the world with your friends and family. Pamper yourself. Give back to your parents and make them proud.

While waiting for that perfect moment, strive to be a better person. You do not need someone to be complete. You certainly can raise your standards for yourself!

This is why she is single.

She is single because she is tired of playing as the second best.

She is single because she is sick and tired of being treated like garbage.

She is single because she knows that she deserves only the best.

She is single because she already knows her worth.

She is single because she is pretty capable of being on her own.

She is single because she is tired of being left behind.

She is single because she is extraordinary and she needs an extraordinary man, too.

She is single because she wants her life to be free from commitment. And that’s okay.

She is single because she has dreams to achieve yet.

She is single because no one has dared to tame her soul.

She is single because she is fearless about who she is and what she wants.

She is single because she knows that it isn’t her time yet.

She is single because she wants to love herself more.

She is at the point of her life that she does not need anyone to feel whole and loved. She does not feel lonely about being single. She does not feel unloved because she loves herself enough…Or maybe, at this point of her life, she loves herself so much. She has been busy nurturing her career. She has been busy taking care of her loved ones.

She is not closing her doors on love, but not at this point yet. Her travels with friends have been keeping her busy. Past experiences have taught her a lot of things, and among these, that loyalty takes much time to develop, hence it would be best to love yourself first before loving someone else.

She misses you, but she will not chase you…not anymore. She still cares for you, but she will not show it…She still wants to give you a chance, but it is not worth it. She still wants to be with you, but she knows that it will just be a neverending toxic relationship. She knows it will be hard for her to start over, but she will not beg you to stay. Certainly not!

For too long, she had been the one who had loved dearly. She had been the one who had fought for the relationship to work. It was a one-way traffic all along. She wants no more of that.

How does it feel to love someone you had prayed for?

When you love someone you had prayed for, love would never fail. No matter how many hardships you’d go through, they would always .

When you love someone you had prayed for, you understand that it would never be a perfect one, but you are there for each other. You would complement each other on all fronts.

When you love someone you had prayed for, you’d accept his or her entire being. You would accept his or her past. You would accept all of his or her imperfections.

When you love someone you had prayed for, such love is bound to really last— both ways. Even while on the verge of challenging mess-ups, you’d hold on to each other as if clinging to dear life itself.

When you love someone you had prayed for, you would realize why all those previous relationships in your past had failed. You’d be able to make sense of the hurt that you felt before. You’d realize why you had too many struggles before. And the reason? Someone better or THE RIGHT ONE had yet to come into your life.

When you love someone you had prayed for, your mind will really be at peace and set on the person you are with regardless of the number of men or women trying to win you.

When you love someone you had prayed for, you would be there for each other no matter what. You would defy everything trying to set you apart. All your risks and sacrifices would be well worth it.

She hates the idea that no matter how badly you treated her, she could not hate you at all.

She hates it that you took her for granted, but she cannot stop caring for you.

She hates it when all she can do is cry and reminisce those memories with you.

She hates herself for the failed relationship that was not her fault in the first place.

She hates the idea that she is sad and depressed while you are so happy with someone else. She hates it because no matter how hard she tries to forget you, she can’t. She re every detail of you. She re the way you were when you were together.

She is sad. She is mired in misery. She just wants to move on and be okay.

this, you are worth fighting for.

You might have been cheated multiple times. You might be taken for granted time and time again. But DO NOT STOP LOVING.

You are as precious as the flowers in the field. You are as awesome as the stars in the sky. You are beautiful, and you certainly deserve the best.

You deserve someone who reciprocates the intensity of love that you can offer. You deserve someone who does not hold back. Do not feel bad about yourself. Someone out there will surely treat you right because you are worth it.

To the next guy who will fall in love with her:

She has been through a lot of heartaches, so if your intention is just for game and temporary pleasure, please leave! She has been fooled a lot of times; she does not need another heartbreak.

She had heard all sorts of promises before—none of them fulfilled. She can only hope that you’d be different and that you would be true to your word.

She had been left hanging multiple times before. She hopes that you would be different and that you would stay. She hopes that you mean what you say and that you’d fight for her.

She might have trust issues at this point. These come as an aftermath of her past. She might need reassurance from time to time. It might be hard for her to open up at first, but she’d be worth it. She hopes that you would be patient with her.

She had been begging for time and affection for so long, so this time around, she hopes that she’d get the feeling of being prioritized and being truly loved.

She has high hopes for you. You must be extraordinary because she gave you a chance. She will never be easy to deal with. She will sometimes make you upset and angry. But she wants you to understand her.

She knows that the road ahead for the two of you will not be easy. Rest assured

she will not give up on you. She will do everything to keep you. She knows that the future is uncertain, but she hopes that you are finally the one destined for her.

Why you should love someone in God’s perfect timing...

You have to love someone according to God’s perfect timing because in His time, love will never fail. It will always prosper. It is bound to last through the test of time. It may not be perfect, but it will persevere. In God’s perfect time, love will not be jealous, but patient and kind. In His time, you will accept each other wholeheartedly. You will never keep records of wrongs. You will forgive each other’s shortcomings.

You have to put God as the center of the relationship, so you will be guided. CHOOSE LOVE over lust. Choose to be spiritually connected with each other. Choose to stick through hardships. Choose to withstand people’s judgments. In God’s time, although things will not be easy, but everything will be worth it.

To the girl who deserves so much better:

Young Lady, you are now a beautiful mess. Surely, you did not want such an ending. You did not expect it to end too soon. Do not blame yourself. What is bound to happen happens because life is neither a fairytale nor a movie. Sometimes, the ending is not the cliché plot you would usually expect.

Put your head up; you are stronger than you think. Let those tears fall but not your worth. LET GO of your anger, frustrations, sadness, and disappointments. This is not the end of your love story. This is not the end of life.

This is the perfect time for you to rebuild yourself. To love yourself even more. To be more focused in life. Sometimes, you do not always need a prince to save you. Sometimes you are way better on your own.

Forget about the guy who treated you like shit. He does not deserve even a fraction of your time and thoughts. Surely, he does not deserve the sleepless nights. He does not deserve your tears.

To that brokenhearted girl:

I hope you are doing fine today. I know you are not, but thanks for trying. You haven’t really smiled genuinely for so long. I miss that. I miss your vibe. I miss your laughter. I miss the old you.

I know that right now, things have not sunk in yet. You are still thinking that he will come back. That he is just playing with you. That everything will be fine. And you still hope that you can wake up anytime soon from this nightmare.

You have cried in silence because no one ever bothered to ask how your day went. Behind your laughter hides so much pain and anxiety. You wanted to break your silence, but no one seemed to understand. No one seemed to listen.

You have questioned your worth. You have amassed a lot of “what ifs”. There are still a lot of unanswered questions in your mind right now: Again and again, you ask why it ended too soon. You cannot sleep well. You are too tired of crying. You have grown numb. Pain and numbness alternately dominate your being. Then, confusion sets in.

But cheer up, Young Lady! You do not deserve to be treated badly. No one deserves to make you feel like you are never enough. No one has the right to make you feel so low. No one has the right to change you, just for the relationship to work. No one has the right to control you.

It will be a tough journey to get over him, but you will be fine. It is really difficult to start over—that is true. What you need right now is to slowly pick up

the pieces of yourself. Slowly gain confidence to face the world anew. Slowly recover your faith in yourself, and believe that you deserve someone better. You deserve someone who will accept your imperfections. You might not be okay right now, but you will be at the right time. You will soon reach that point where you will just laugh so hard for having mourned so much over someone who really does not deserve you. Smile—it makes you even more beautiful!

One-sided love is a selfless love, but there comes a point where you should put an end to allowing the death of your self-worth over someone who does not care for you at all.

You are worth it.

You are worth it despite all your imperfections.

You are worth it despite all your scars.

You are worth it despite your dark past.

You are worth it despite all your mistakes in the past.

No one has the right to mistreat you.

No one has the right to take you for granted.

No one has the right to treat you as second rate.

No one has the right to judge you.

You deserve all the happiness in the world.

You deserve success.

You deserve someone who will treat you right.

She likes a tough kind of love.

People think it is an abomination.

People think it is crazy.

People think it is a sin.

To love and be condemned for it,

To love and be judged and hated for it.

To love and go against the world.

It is a kind of love embraced only by the brave ones. They stand firm. Their love binds them. It makes them stronger. It makes them one. They love each other despite the hatred, and despite what people think. Love wins.

They are not asking for anything but acceptance and respect.

Are these too much to ask?

This is how it feels to beg for love.

You make all the efforts to get your loved one’s attention. You always find time for him, but he does not do the same for you. You text him first and you wait forever for his reply. You flood him with messages on social media. He notices your message but will not open them. Even as he has opened your message, the phone screen only flashes “Seen”.

You always make it a point to look good to win his approval. You make it a habit to be noticed by him. You swallow your pride. You make the first move even if you appear desperate, but you don’t mind having that image. You are okay with not being treated with importance. You don’t seem to mind getting hurt again and again.

Aren’t you tired of always making the first move? Aren’t you tired of doing your best for someone who will not keep you or someone who does not even notice your special efforts or your special worth? You are so much better than just being someone who begs for love and attention. Spare some love and respect for yourself. It really is not worth all the shame and unrequited attention.

This is for someone who’s still in the denial stage:

So, nothing has sunk in just yet? You do not know how you feel. That numb feeling and hurt you feel within you...you do not know how to react. You burst into tears. You want to scream. You just want to disappear—vanish from everyone’s sight.

Nothing is the same. You might as well see that. Yet you still hope that he will text you. You still expect that he will call you back. You try to convince yourself that he will come back…that he is just playing around just as it had happened in the past, when he did, and everything later turned out to be okay.

Why do you try to rationalize things in your mind? You keep on blaming yourself, asking what you did wrong. You make all the efforts to communicate with him. How desperate you must sound; but you don’t care, as long as you get to exhaust all means to win him back.

It must be difficult for you to bear the pain right now, but it will get better each day. Cry until it hurts no more. Some good things aren’t just meant to last. Some people aren’t meant to stay, but are only meant to teach us lessons and make us better persons. Trust me; at the right time, you will be able to accept everything and you will be happier.

To all the ladies reading this:

While you are crying in your room, he is already happy with someone else. While you are questioning your self-worth, he is already having the best days of his life with his new victim. He is so happy posting pictures of them on social media, while you are still having a hard time sleeping at night and being sick. You do not want to exist in this world anymore while he is so busy loving someone else.

Can’t you see what I am trying to say? He does not deserve all your tears. He does not deserve your grief. Look at you! The princess who’s been free spirited is now so helpless. Get up, girl! Rebuild yourself. Pick up the pieces of yourself.

Wear that confidence once again. He does not deserve any amount of care from you. It is about time to unleash the fiercer and braver you. You are beautiful and you deserve so much better.

HOW TO LOVE A WOMAN

PATIENCE. Be patient with her. She will have mood swings. She will be dramatic. She will be emotional at some point.

ACCEPTANCE. Accept the real her. Embrace her imperfections. Do not add up to her insecurities.

ATTENTION. Give her the attention she deserves. Do not take her for granted. Find time to be with her. Spend quality time together.

RESPECT. Respect her choices and the decisions that she makes. Do not take advantage of her weaknesses. Give her your 100% .

EFFORTS. She does not need to be lavished with the expensive things that this world offers. A dose of sincere love would be enough.

LOVE. Love her deeply. Be faithful to her. Address her worries. Make her feel special every day. Never cheat on her. Do not give her reasons to doubt you.

She will never be a perfect girlfriend. At some point, you will find her not easy to deal with. You may sometimes have a hard time pacifying her, but if you love her, you’ll stay. Because you know she’d been through a lot. And she needs to be taken care of.

This is for the man who got taken for granted:

Your intentions are pure. You have a heart of gold. Your love might not be reciprocated, but you are doing fine.

Do not regret all the efforts you made. Do not regret all the sweet words you said. Do not regret if you cared too much. Do not regret loving really hard.

Brother, you are not a failure. You did not lose anything at all. And no, not all people are the same.

Someday, someone will see how special you are. Someone will appreciate all your efforts. Someone will love you really hard. Someday, someone will also treat you right.

Why is it difficult to get out of a toxic relationship?

You do not want to start over. You still hope that he or she will change. That is why no matter how people tell you to let go, you still hold on no matter how much pain you feel.

You believe that he or she will not hurt you anymore when you give them a second chance. You accept apology after apology. With open arms you still welcome him or her no matter how hurt you are.

But when will you ever learn? In love, we must be like a soldier who knows when to fight and when to surrender.

So, you just met this girl and instantly got attracted to her.

You began texting each other and chatting. You got used to burning phone lines with lengthy conversations until the wee hours of the morning. Midnight calls...Skype, Messenger, and more…coffee dates and movie nights…How sweet!

You made sure to check on her. You gave her chocolates and flowers. You showered her with sweet words. You told her how much she meant to you.

You told her how amazing she was. You said, “I love you.” That made her blush.

You promised her a lot of things. You said that you would treat her right. She believed you.

Days ed, and she noticed how you had changed. You craved for her body. You wanted her to send nude shots of herself, but she wanted you to send her love, affection, and respect.

She was wrong all along. She gave her love and trust to someone who did not deserve her. You succeeded in deceiving her. She gave her love to someone who was not worthy of her.

Good thing she found her way out.

Why did it end too soon?

It ended too soon because God does not want you to suffer further. He felt your pain. He saw your sacrifices.

He knows what your heart desires. He sees you when you cry at night feeling hurt and helpless. He feels your pains.

Your relationship failed to last because he was not the right person for you. God just saved you from further agony.

Wipe all those tears. Rebuild yourself. It hurts right now but everything will soon be fine. You will be okay. Do not question why things happened the way they turned out. God’s plans are always the best. Thank Him for saving you.

Give this kind of love.

If you have the chance to say, “I love you,” then say it.

If you have the chance to show someone how you love him or her, go prove it.

Take risks. Take chances.

You might be rejected, but at least, you have expressed how you really feel—in words and in actions. And that’s what really matters.

You deserve this kind of love.

You deserve the kind of love that is so real and strong…something that will stand amidst hardships and other challenges.

You deserve the kind of love, which though imperfect, is bound to stick… something that is for keeps…something destined for FOREVER!

You deserve the kind of love that sees beyond the physical…something that embraces your imperfections.

It is never too late to start over. It is never too late to love again.

Appreciate one’s existence.

It feels good to be appreciated. Make the people in your life feel valued and appreciated. Never waste an opportunity to make them feel that they matter. Don’t ever make them feel worthless.

The truth is, some people discover the worth of someone only when it is too late. They fail to make an effort to show they love that someone, making them slowly lose him/her, and by the time they realize that person’s worth, he or she would be gone.

Some people will not give the love you deserve, not until you are ready to let them go. Some people will only know your worth when you are already gone.

Some tend to abuse you, and by the time they realize your worth, you’d be just about ready to let go of them.

Take good care of the one who loves you wholeheartedly, or else, you might end up losing him or her.

Love should be a two-way street. It takes two to make it work. It takes both parties to make sacrifices for each other.

When one is angry, one should be level-headed.

When one is upset, the other should cheer up.

When love starts to lose its spark, the other should do something to ignite it.

When one gets impatient, the other should be patient.

Love is a choice you make. It is a choice to fulfill your vows and promises. It is a choice to continue loving the person—faults and all. You made the choice to be there for your special someone in sickness and in health.

When you love someone, you have to take risks. Love is not for cowards.

How does it feel to be single for a long time?

When you are comfortable being single for a long time, you just feel like the idea of settling down is not for you. You believe that you still have a lot of things to do in your life than to be tied to someone. You do not hate the idea of commitment, but you are not into it yet because you are busy loving yourself. You are busy pampering yourself.

When you are single for a long time, you do not settle for temporary feelings and temporary people. The idea of love does not scare you, but if you want to be in a relationship, you want it to be really worth it and for keeps. You want it to be a real one.

You learned your lessons in the past, so you know better this time. You never allow yourself to be treated like someone second rate. When people want to get out of your life, you let go of them. You do not beg them to stay. You do not force love to happen. You do not beg for their time and affection. You do not invest emotions on someone who will not do the same for you.

When you are single for a long time, you have become so tough. You have become so independent, so it would take an amazing person to make you open up. It would make an extraordinary someone to change your mind.

It takes self-love and maturity to stop begging for someone to stay.

You should not only settle for being a temporary pleasure giver.

You deserve to be considered a home.

HOW TO LOVE A MAN

UNDERSTAND. He will never be perfect. At some point he will be inconsistent. Sometimes he will be impatient. Sometimes it will be hard for him to handle your mood swings. He gets angry too. His mood changes as well.

FREEDOM. Give him the freedom to do the things that he likes. Do not box him. Do not choke him in the neck. The truth is, if he really loves you, he will never do things that will hurt you. He has a life to live so do not take that away from him. You are not his world. You are just a part of it.

RECIPROCATE. Make efforts for him too. Ask him how his day went. Ask him what went wrong. Love him hard as well. Be patient with him too.

RESPECT. You have to respect his choices and decisions. Give him respect that he deserves.

AFFECTION. Show him that you care. Wrap him with warm hugs. Show to him that you are always there for him.

ATTENTION. Like you, he needs your attention too. He needs reassurance as well that he is the only one for you. Do not give him reasons to doubt you.

There will never be a perfect man. At some point, you will get disappointed and

upset because he did not become the man you expect him to be. But because you love him you accept every bits of him. If he is worth the risk, keep him.

LIFE MUSINGS

The truth is, not everyone will like you, but that is perfectly okay. You cannot force everyone to like you. You cannot force all people to believe in your truth. One thing important though is for you to always believe in your abilities. It is important that you yourself believe that what you do matters. Do not convince others too hard to believe in you because they already have a version of the truth that they believe in. Trying to please them will just be a waste of energy.

The most important thing to do is to focus on the positive side. Focus on the people who love you. For as long as you are not stepping on anyone, you are certainly doing great. For as long as you can sleep soundly at night, you are doing fine.

Depression is never a laughing matter.

Mental illness should never be joked about. It is real. It is dark. It is that feeling that you want to be happy, but you do not know where and when to have fun… that feeling that gets too heavy over time.

It is that feeling that even when at sleep, you are haunted by it. Your hands and feet get cold. Your heart beats fast. You do not see your worth. You just feel like the world is too big for you. You just feel like you are never enough. It is that feeling of emptiness that grows within you. You feel helpless. You feel tired.

Being depressed is not just about sadness. It is more than that. It is not only about withdrawing from the world; it is also about pretending to fake a smile even when you are dying inside.

Seek help and check on your friends. Make them feel that they matter before it’s too late!

Depression has no face. The person who appears to be the happiest could be carrying the biggest burden.

Always be kind. Always shed a light to someone struggling in the dark!

If you’re about to give up, read this:

Life will always have its share of bumps and delays. You wish to get something right away, but at some point you’ll just end up disappointed. You get lost in the journey. You get consumed by failures along the way.

One thing that you have to is to see your struggles as a blessing. Why? Because that is when you become more patient. That is when your faith gets stronger. And that is when you become more human.

Whatever struggles you have, they are just temporary. You will be healed soon. It will not hurt too much anymore. You will soon be able to flash a smile without faking it.

Please hold on. Never give up.

When you feel tired in life, get some rest. When you fail, it is okay to cry and be upset about it.

There will never be a perfect life. It is never too late to dream. Keep going, and you will have your shining moment soon!

There is beauty in pain.

There is beauty in a broken heart. You tend to be vulnerable and that’s when you become more human. That’s when you become stronger in life.

You might not know the reason behind your sufferings for now, but soon enough, it will make sense. There is a greater purpose for all the heartaches that you are going through.

Never let failures define who you are. You always have the choice to stand up and be brave. And when it gets darker, always that you are not alone in this journey.

Not having the fairest skin does not mean that you are ugly. Being short does not make you less of a woman. Having flat boobs does not make you less attractive. Not being sexy does not mean that you are not beautiful.

There is so much more to life than just the physical beauty that we are so obsessed about. Real beauty is not defined by how physically attractive we are. It is about how we make our lives meaningful. It is about being comionate and kind, and also about seeing those things that are not visible to the naked eye.

Choose to have a beautiful heart rather than a beautiful face. A beautiful face fades through time, but a beautiful heart lasts forever.

Your scars and imperfections make you beautiful. Embrace yourself. Love yourself. And the best gift that you can give to yourself is acceptance; it is the point when you will eventually be happy.

When you are about to give up, think about why you are sacrificing so much.

Trust me; you are not too far from your goal. You are on the right track.

When you want to end your life, think about the people who love you. Trust me; there are people who genuinely care for you and love you.

When you are about to do something bad, think about the people who will be hurt. Trust me; they just want the best for you.

No one has a perfect life. Each one of us has his or her own share of struggles. Hold on a bit more. Just keep going!

When you reach these points in life...

“My sickness has no cure. I surrender my life.”

“People always leave me. I hate this life.”

“My life is pointless. I don’t have the reason to live.”

“Why do I have a lot of problems? I can’t take this anymore.”

I hope you can say...

“By God’s grace, I will be healed. I will be okay.”

“When people leave me, God must have a reason for it. He knows what is best for me. He does not want me to suffer further.”

“My life is full of joy because God loves me. I can feel his presence in my life. It is also such a good thing to see His wonderful creations. Life is wonderful.”

“God will never give me problems that I cannot handle. I have to strengthen my

faith. Everything will be okay in His perfect timing.”

You may be hurting right now, but always trust God’s plans. He sees your struggles. He feels your pains. He is with you in your journey. You may not understand God’s wisdom, but you should always trust His will. Everything that you are going through happens for a purpose.

HOW TO HAVE A HAPPY LIFE

1. Care less about what people say. No matter what you do, people have something to say. Whether you do good or bad, they will have opinions about you. Ignore whatever negativity they may try to bring you.

2. Choose your battles. Not all battles are worth your attention. Not everything is worth your time. If you know the better truth, you have nothing to explain.

3. Think positively. Look at the brighter side of everything. Everything will eventually fall in to place.

4. Believe in yourself. Believe in your capabilities. Believe that you can do great things in life.

5. Never compare your progress with that of anyone else. You have your own journey to take. You have different struggles. You will soon have your time, too.

6. Do not pressure yourself too much. Success takes time. It takes efforts. It takes hard work and commitment.

7. Do not forget to smile. No matter how tough the journey gets, keep on smiling. You do not own all the problems in the world.

8. Embrace your imperfections. Accept your past. Correct your mistakes and learn from them.

9. Love yourself. One of the best kinds of love is self-love. You will never go wrong with it. It takes maturity to be on that level. Accept and love your flaws, so no one can use it against you.

10. Do good even when no one is watching. Spread kindness around you.

This is for the ones who will not graduate on time:

Not being able to finish your studies on time is never shameful. Do not pressure yourself just because you did not make it on time as people expect of you. Do not let other people’s expectations define you.

We have our own struggles. We have different journeys to take. We face different challenges. Never let people’s judgments shape you.

What is important is you never give up until you reach your dreams. Do not stop chasing them. Quitters stop aiming for success.

Sometimes, we have dreams that we set aside for the moment due to circumstances, but that doesn’t mean we will not achieve them.

Life is not a race. You will soon get there. For as long as you have the ion and dedication to get it, you are surely on the right track. There is no such thing as delayed success. You will have your time soon. You will soon be marching with best OOTD, and all your sacrifices and hardships will be worth it.

This is a letter for my parents:

I am extremely blessed to have you. Please know that I appreciate all your efforts to raise me. We may not be rich, but you always make sure I’ll have a better future.

Thank you for all the love, guidance, and . I could not ask for more. You are always around to lift me up. You always make sure to be there when no one believes in me. Thank you for the unconditional love. Thank you for always being there even when others have turned their backs.

I am sorry if I did not become the child you had expected me to be. I’ve made a lot of mistakes. I’ve disappointed you. But please know that I am really doing my best. I am really doing the best that I can to be able to pay back all the good things you have done for me.

Don’t worry, I may be your imperfect child, but trust that I will soon make you proud. And I love you.

This is for all the bread winners:

Thank you for being so selfless. Thank you for the never-ending love. Thank you for having so much drive to provide for the family. Thank you for the selfless efforts.

You are one of a kind. You are willing to give everything to your family, even up to the point that you do not leave anything for yourself. You are someone who values family really hard and someone capable of such great sacrifices.

Do not worry because your efforts are being noticed. All your sacrifices are not put to waste. All your good deeds are valued.

Thank you for having a heart of gold. You only deserve the best!

If you are stressed at work, read this:

Working is not as easy as ABC. There are a lot of things that you need to balance. You need to effectively manage your time to beat your deadlines. You have to be adaptable to change. You have to be flexible.

If you are on the verge of giving up because of pressure, you cannot allow pressure to blow you away. No matter which company you get employed in, pressure will always be there. There’s always a giant to beat. But pressure makes you driven and focused on your goals. Take your mistakes as learning experiences to be better.

There is no such thing as a perfect company. What you need to do right now is to learn all the facets of your job so that at the right time, you can take yourself to the next level.

You were born not just to work and pay off your bills. You need some time to pamper yourself as well. You need to go on coffee dates…watch movies…read new books…have fun at the beach. You need to chase sunsets.

Do not be too hard on yourself. You are just doing fine. Success does not happen overnight. You will get soon to where you have always wanted to go to. You will have your own shining moment.

If you are struggling with your studies, read this:

I know that at some point, you just feel tired of keeping up with deadlines and pressures. You have tons of projects, theses, term papers, exams, and dreaded teachers to deal with. At some point, you might have questioned if all of your efforts are worth it.

Do not let pressure consume you. If you fail in your exams, learn from your failures. Do not let your studies take away the fun in life. You do not just wake up every day and talk about the academe. You have a life to live. Give yourself time to chill. Go out on coffee breaks with friends. Unwind on the beach with them. Watch movies. You deserve to have fun. You are too young to be that stressed.

The struggle is real, for sure, but you can do it. Believe in your capacity—you can and you definitely will. All the sleepless nights will be worth it soon. You will get to where you have always wanted to be in.

Chances are, you will feel all these:

hurt

rejected

ignored

broken

in pain

depressed

mistreated

hated

cheated on

taken for granted

But you are missing something: “YOU ARE IMPORTANT.”

This is for the ones who have been rejected:

You might have been rejected by someone, but that does not make you less of a person. It does not make you less worthy.

Some people are not meant for us. Some people are not ready for the kind of love we can give.

Save all your time, love, and efforts for someone willing to be with you through thick and thin.

Do not be stuck with someone who does not value you. Learn to walk away and never look back.

You will get the love that you deserve soonest. Take your time!

This is for the ones who are afraid to love again:

Your heart might be broken into pieces right now, but take your time. Feel every bit of the pain.

Cry. Mourn. Be upset.

That is part of the healing process.

You will have a hard time to trust again. That is understandable. It is surely not easy to open up again after a failed relationship.

TRUST ISSUES—they’re okay.

Never force yourself to immediately jump into another relationship.

Do not use someone just to forget another because will only be complicating things.

Do not play with anyone’s feelings.

But let me tell you this: Time will come when you will meet someone who’ll make you fall in love again. That person will make everything right.

It will make sense as to why it did not work with someone in the past.

this:

Never stop loving because when you do, YOU STOP LIVING.

What makes you strong?

I am not really a strong person. I cry a lot. I feel bad most of the time. I easily get upset and disappointed, but I have to stand for myself because I know that I have a greater purpose in life.

No matter how strong we are, we always have our breaking point.

That is when we can no longer take how we feel inside. When it is too heavy to handle everything, you are free to cry.

If only we have the choice not to suffer from pain, we would take it right away.

If only we have the power to make certain people love us back, we would do it for sure.

If only we have the ability to forget all the sad memories right away, we would love to make it happen.

It is just that sometimes we are really left with no choice. But look at the brighter side of life. Pain allows us to grow as persons. It makes us stronger and wiser. It makes us better versions of ourselves.

Take your time. Things will get better for sure.

To my future self:

As you are reading this, you are in complete relief because you were able to sur all the struggles you had. You were able to defy all the odds with your goals in life.

You can’t help but smile and be amazed at God’s love…on how he carried you through in the darkest parts of your life. On how he lifted up your spirit when you felt like giving up.

You can’t help but be amazed that all your efforts paid off…that all your sleepless nights were worth it. You are now living the life that you had prayed for over some time.

Good thing you never gave up!

Life will always have struggles. Love will never be easy. But you have to keep on going. We do not know what lies ahead, always have hope in your heart…

: Love yourself...

Acknowledgments

This book will never be possible without the following people:

To my parents, Mama Nesa and Papa Naldo, thank you so much for all the love and that you showered upon me. We are not rich but you always make sure to provide for me in the best way possible. I am so blessed to have caring, loving and ive parents. Thank you for being my light when the dark is slowly consuming me. Thank you for being my strength in times that I feel weak.

To my high school friends John Dale, Debie, Belle, Queeny, Merriefin, Shermie, Honey Leigh, Kevin and Suzie Ann, thank you for always believing in me when everyone else is turning their back. Thank you for staying and for the gift of friendship.

To my execom family Razel, Rhea, Achellie, Jane, Diane, Jacob, Krystiel, Charity, Paul, Raymond, Joed, Zepril and Cres, thank you so much. Thank you for always bringing out the best in me.

To my college friends Nars, Glenda, Sammie, Janice, Eula and Deanne, thank you so much for always keeping me sane and for always reminding me that I can accomplish things.

To my Jedreamers, thank you so much for being with me in this journey. Thank you for not just being a er but also a family to lean on. I will never be where I am now without your utmost .

To ABS-CBN PUBLISHING INC, thank you so much for this once in a life time opportunity. I am just so grateful for everything.

To God Almighty, thank you for giving me the strength to carry on. Thank you for being my refuge in times of doubts and failures. Thank you for the gift of wisdom and for loving me no matter how imperfect I am. I will forever praise your name!

And lastly, to everyone who made wonderful memories with me, thank you for all the laughters and lessons. Thank you for sharing your light to the world. Thank you for sharing a part of yourself in my journey.

My heart is full of gratitude.

About the Author

Neil Jed Castro was born in Dalingding Sur. A small barangay in the town of Medellin — a municipality located in the Northern part of Cebu.

He took up Bachelor of Science in Psychology at the University of San JoseRecoletos in Cebu City and graduated Magna Cum Laude. Before he pursued his ion for writing, he worked in the field of Human Resource and also as a Quality Analyst in the BPO Industry.