Maybe Yours 5b47r

Maybe Yours

A Love and Wine Novel Book Three

Claire Raye

Copyright © 2021 by Claire Raye www.claireraye.com

All rights reserved. This book may not be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission from the author. Please do not participate in or encourage the piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. All characters and storylines are the property of the author and your and respect is appreciated. The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarities to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

Cover Photograph by Lindee Robinson Cover Design by Sarah Hansen of Okay Creations

Your free books are waiting!

Are you excited to meet our Rockport Beach crew? OMG, you are!!?? We’re thrilled and we want to say thank you by offering you even more! This FREE prequel gives you a glimpse into the early lives of Beck & Kelsey and takes place before the events of Coming Home to You (Book One).

Grab your FREE copy of Beginning with You, click here!

And, because one freebie is never enough, we are also excited to offer you a FREE prequel of our Hawthorn Hills Duet Series!! This takes us back to the early lives of Sienna, Caleb and Reid and takes place before the events of Complicate Me (Book One).

Grab your FREE copy of Confuse Me right here!

Happy reading and thank you!

Chapter One

Penny

Chapter Two

Tommy

Chapter Three

Penny

Chapter Four

Tommy

Chapter Five

Penny

Chapter Six

Tommy

Chapter Seven

Penny

Chapter Eight

Tommy

Chapter Nine

Penny

Chapter Ten

Tommy

Chapter Eleven

Penny

Chapter Twelve

Tommy

Chapter Thirteen

Penny

Chapter Fourteen

Tommy

Chapter Fifteen

Penny

Chapter Sixteen

Tommy

Chapter Seventeen

Penny

Chapter Eighteen

Tommy

Chapter Nineteen

Penny

Chapter Twenty

Tommy

Chapter Twenty-One

Penny

Chapter Twenty-Two

Tommy

Chapter Twenty-Three

Penny

Chapter Twenty-Four

Tommy

Chapter Twenty-Five

Penny

Chapter Twenty-Six

Tommy

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Penny

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Tommy

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Penny

Chapter Thirty

Tommy

Chapter Thirty-One

Penny

Chapter Thirty-Two

Tommy

Chapter Thirty-Three

Penny

Chapter Thirty-Four

Tommy

Chapter Thirty- Five

Penny

Chapter Thirty- Six

Tommy

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Penny

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Tommy

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Penny

What’s Next

Your Free Books are Waiting!

Books by Claire Raye

About the Author

Acknowledgments

Chapter One

Penny

I’m a loser magnet. Or at least that’s what it feels like as I kick another one of my loser boyfriends to the curb, tossing his box of random things out the door with him. Take your stupid electric toothbrush with the dead batteries and your gamer headphones that make it impossible to have a conversation with you. No more guys who look good and talk big, but still live with their mother. No entrepreneurs, because that’s just code for unemployed. And no more moving in with someone after knowing them for a hot second. This is the new me. I slam the door, letting out a loud huff of approval as I nod my head. It’s done. It’s over and it won’t happen again, because I’m not dating anyone for a long time. I’ve said these words after almost every breakup and for some reason I just can’t stick to it. It’s not like I’m lonely or desperate to have a boyfriend. It just always feels like the situation presents itself and I hop on board. But this time, no hopping. The only good thing that came from making a rash decision in a relationship was my move to Napa. It’s been a little over two years since I landed in this beautiful little area of the country. It’s a place I’d never been to nor did I have any intention of moving here, but my flighty and hard to pin down boyfriend at the time decided we should leave the cold New England winters behind and drive across the country to California. Turns out winters weren’t the only thing he decided to leave behind. He dumped my ass just outside of Vegas for a showgirl with big boobs and ten pounds of makeup on her face. Our original landing place was supposed to be San Francisco based on a book he read about some guy who takes a road trip and finds himself or some shit. All I

needed to find at that moment was a place to live and I knew Vegas was not it. I might be young and loud, but the lights of the strip made me feel like I was either going to puke or have a seizure. Luckily for me the car was mine and I just kept on driving with little idea of what the hell I was doing. I wanted something quiet, some place that didn’t feel like it was suffocating me the way that asshole did the entire road trip. Some place that felt open, where I could smell the air and feel the open space around me. I wasn’t going to find that in San Francisco or any other city on the coast of California, so I went inland and landed in Napa. It was all touristy and quaint and the air was warm, and if I’m being honest, I met a guy. That’s the real reason I stayed, that and the fact that I landed my amazing job at Somerville Winery and Vineyard. I like to believe the guy led me to the job and that was the reason I was destined to meet him. It’s a little bit of bullshit I like to spin to make myself feel better, because he was gone before I even learned the different temperatures wine should be kept at. I didn’t intend on working in the tasting room at Somerville’s. I knew nothing about wine or anything that could be considered classy by any means. I was twenty-one years old with two grand to my name, a ten year old car and three years of random college classes under my belt. I never could quite pin down a major, let alone pin myself down. I applied for a waitressing job in their little restaurant that held wonderful smells and smiling people and everything about it felt like the calm and normalcy I so desperately needed. But Lauren, one of the owners, swooped in, all blonde hair and bossy, and put me in charge of the tasting room, despite my protests. They hadn’t had someone in there in months and she and her sister Ellen were handling it on their own. She had no concerns about me being able to learn the job and put me to work immediately. Turns out it was exactly where I was supposed to be. It’s social and fun and I never thought I could make a living chatting with people, but that’s exactly what I’m doing. “You’re a natural,” Lauren had said during my interview. “You’re young and cute and fun, and people will love you. Just wait.”

She ushered me out of her office and into the tasting room, and it was in that moment that I fell in love. No guy I had ever been with ever looked like this or smelled like this or felt like this. This tasting room was my new home. It was wood and metal and terracotta tile, it felt so industrial but also amazingly welcoming with its smell of wood and grapes and I loved the sound of conversations and the din of people laughing. It was my new home and would be a place I would find solace even when my personal life was a disaster. It’s the only place I want to be right now. “I’m done with men!” I announce with flourish, flinging my brown hair over my shoulder, as if this makes it more final when I walk into Lauren and Jack’s office. Jack’s the first to let out a riotous laugh and Lauren smacks him on the arm, hitting him with a steely glare telling him to shut up. “Sorry,” he mutters, shrugging his shoulders sheepishly. “Nah, it’s not like I haven’t said this a million times before, but I swear, this time I mean it.” I toss a fist into the air as if I’m psyching myself up for the new and improved me. “I’m with you,” Lauren says. “Boys are so much work.” She rolls her eyes dramatically, giving me a wink, while Jack stands there with a mock appalled look on his face. Lauren and Jack met as kids while his father was working at Somerville’s. They always had this teenage crush, love-hate thing going on and were separated when Jack’s dad returned to Australia after his work at Somerville’s was done. But fate wouldn’t hear of it, or maybe it had more to do with Lauren’s meddling sister Ellen, when Jack walked back into Lauren’s life to fix a machine his father installed all those years ago. They now own and run the vineyard together along with Ellen and they’re currently working on getting their new business venture up and running. They’re moving into cider production after purchasing the land adjacent to Somerville’s that just so happened to be a fully planted apple orchard. They are literally who I aspire to be someday. They got married here at the vineyard in the most beautiful ceremony I’ve ever

seen, and they’ve been living their happily ever after ever since. They are legit relationship goals, and it doesn’t go unnoticed that this playful banter they have going on keeps things light and fun in their relationship. I want what they have, but I’ve clearly been looking in all the wrong places...like bars, the gas station, the Las Vegas strip and even, dare I say it, Tinder. It makes me shudder just thinking about it. What the hell is wrong with me? “You know what you should do, mate?” Jack says. I still love his accent and the way he calls everyone mate. “I was just reading about this dating app that doesn’t use any pictures, so it’s all based on compatibility rather than looks.” “Jack!” Lauren calls out, smacking him on the arm again. “Have you not listened to anything she’s said?” She shakes her head and mouths the words “I’m sorry” to me, like I’m actually bothered by Jack’s suggestion. I’m not, far from it, because after working with Jack for more than a year now, I know he has the best of intentions. “And anyway, how rude of you to suggest that Penny an app that has no pictures of the people, like she isn’t absolutely adorable.” “Take it easy, Lu,” Jack says, his hands held up defensively as he uses his sweet little nickname for her. “I was simply suggesting she because she is so pretty and maybe this would actually attract a better quality of men.” He’s firm in his words, defending himself and making me feel good in the process. I’ll take the compliment. “Or maybe it would attract an even worse group,” Lauren laments, wrinkling up her nose in disgust. “Well, it’s not like I’ve had the best luck on my own. I should have Jack create my profile and vet everyone that comes through,” I joke, but bordering on serious. Maybe he would do better than I could. “But like I said before, no guys. I’m done for a while.” I flit my hand, brushing off the idea of using a dating app or dating in general. This is a great time to focus on myself and figure out if running the tasting room at Somerville’s is something I see myself doing long-term or if there’s something better out there. One thing I know is California is where I was meant to live. No more cold New

England winters or shoveling snow, and as of right now I can’t see myself ever wanting to leave Somerville’s. “Well, I gotta get to work,” I announce, even though I’m several hours early for my shift. The grounds here are absolutely beautiful and I love that Lauren, Jack or Ellen don’t think it’s weird that I come in early and wander the property. I swear each day I’m here I find something new I love about it, especially now that the orchard next door has been purchased and the cider production is nearly up and running. “You’re three hours early,” Lauren says, winking at me. “You going to stroll around and take it all in?” She knows how much I love it here, because not a day goes by that she isn’t doing the exact same thing. She and Jack were married under her favorite tree, a tree that holds all her childhood memories from growing up at this vineyard. I’ve found her just sitting on the handmade swing that hangs from its branches on a number of occasions. But while she loves the tree and the swing and all the quiet stillness of it being away from the hustle and bustle of tourists, I love the small lake that sits in the middle of the property. In the mornings when my life feels crazy and whatever guy I’m dating has pushed me over the edge, I sit down by the lake and just relax. It’s like the entire outside world disappears, leaving me with the stillness of the water and just the sounds of nature. “I’m going to read a book by the lake,” I tell Lauren, smiling at the fact that most people are confined to an office at their job. Most people don’t have the luxury of walking outside and finding some of the most beautiful scenery in all of California. I live in a tiny apartment above an Italian restaurant in downtown Napa. It’s noisy and touristy and smells like pasta sauce twenty-four hours a day. Somerville’s is my sanctuary. I tell Lauren and Jack goodbye and just as I’m about to leave their office Tommy Andrews, one of the property maintenance guys, walks by calling into me through the open window. “Good, you’re here!” he yells. “I need you to grab the delivery that just came in.

It’s shit that needs to be stocked in the tasting room.” He’s harsh and bossy and sometimes I just want to flip him off, but it’s also fun to give him shit. “I don’t start for another three hours,” I call back. “Then what the hell are you doing here?” he asks, shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head at me. “Not everyone can be as much of a go-getter as you, Tommy!” I yell, giving him a playful smile, but he regards me with an annoyed look. He storms off, but he also knows I’ll get everything done as soon as my shift starts and we’ve come to this mutual agreement that he can tell me what to do, but I just tend to ignore him. “You know, he’s single,” Lauren says with hesitation, but still a little more hopeful than I would like. Jack again hits us with a hearty laugh. “There’s a reason he’s single.” Jack and Tommy didn’t always get along and I get why. Lauren, Ellen and Tommy have been friends since they were kids. He’s protective of them and saw Jack as someone who was looking to cash in on Lauren’s success. Turns out he couldn’t have been more wrong, and he did eventually apologize to Jack, making things far less tense out here. “I gotta agree with Jack on this one, Lauren,” I say, even though Tommy is good-looking, pretty hot actually with his muscular body and disheveled dark curly hair, and those striking green eyes. But he’s all work and no play, far too stuffy and demanding. Not my kind of guy by any means, because I no longer have a type. No guys means no looking. No guys means no dating apps. Can I really do this? Maybe Jack has a point? Maybe I do need to put aside what the person looks like and focus on what they have to offer? Fuck knows I haven’t based any of my

past boyfriends on their ability to hold down a conversation. I deserve better than that. And as I sit down by the lake, I find myself looking up this dating app before my ass has even hit the bench. What the hell am I doing?

Chapter Two

Tommy

“Motherfucker,” I growl, kicking the side of the tractor. “Whoa, easy, mate,” comes Jack’s annoying accent. I roll my eyes even though he can’t see me as I throw the wrench into the toolbox beside me and grab a hammer. Holding it in both hands, I swing hard, smashing it down on the tire bolt with a satisfying clang. “Jesus,” Jack says, walking around to the side where I’m currently crouched in front of a huge tire. “What the hell did it ever do to you?” “It’s fucking stuck,” I mutter as I smash the hammer down again, before reaching for the wrench to try the bolt again. It gives a little this time, but still won’t budge, so I smash it once more with the hammer. This time when I try it, it comes loose and I wrench it off, finally able to change out the tire that’s been fucked ever since I accidently rode over one of the metal pegs that helps hold the vines up. It feels like it’s been one fuck up after another these past few weeks and the last thing I need right now is Jack in here giving me shit about it. When I finally turn to roll the dead tire away, Jack is standing watching me, arms crossed and a huge grin on his face. “What?” I snap as I roll it toward the side of the shed. “When’s the last time you got laid?” I lean the tire against the wall, my eyes closing as I force myself to stay calm and remind myself that I actually do like this guy. Taking a long deep breath, I turn and face him. “And you’re asking me this why?” I ask, mirroring his pose. Jack shrugs as he walks over to the new tire and starts moving it into position beside the tractor. “You seem tense,” he says as he tries to lift it.

He’s got no chance. The thing weighs a ton, so I move over to help him. “I’m not tense,” I reply as we both lift the tire and slide it onto the axle. “You sure about that?” Jack asks, grinning. “I mean I know when I need to relieve a bit of—” “Jack,” I say, a warning tone to my voice. “What?” he asks, hands out as though he has no idea what I’m talking about. I shake my head at him. “Just when I was starting to maybe like you,” I grumble. Jack laughs, reaching for the wrench which he holds out to me. “Please, like you don’t already? We both know I’m impossible to resist. But seriously, Tommy, when?” “Fuck’s sake,” I mutter under my breath as I start to screw on the bolts. “I don’t know. A few weeks ago,” I lie, knowing it’s been far longer than that. Caitlyn and I broke up over six months ago and things hadn’t been great for a while before that, so if I were to guess, I’d say it’s closer to eight months since I had sex. But I’m not telling Jack that. Not a chance in hell he’d let me live down the fact that the only action my dick has seen for the better part of a year is with my own hand. “So, you and what’s her name are definitely over?” he now asks. I tighten the last bolt on the tire before standing, stretching my back as it cracks a few times. “Caitlyn,” I reply, throwing the wrench back into the toolbox. “And yes, we’re over.” “What happened?” Jack asks, and he almost sounds genuinely interested. I shrug. “Don’t know. Grew apart, it happens.” “Only if you let it,” he replies as he wanders over to the bench along the side of the wall. He reaches into the small fridge that sits under it and grabs two bottles of water, throwing one to me. “You not really into her or did something else happen?”

I twist off the cap and take a long drink. “You know, you’re in danger of sounding like a chick, don’t you?” Jack’s grin widens. “Or I’m sounding like a happily married man who gets laid with very hot sex on a regular basis.” I roll my eyes, finishing off my water as I avoid his question. “Come on,” he says. “Talk to me, Goose. It mustn’t have been that great if you just let her walk away.” “It’s not as simple as that,” I eventually say, even as I wonder why the fuck I’m getting into this with him. “Yeah, it is,” he says matter of factly. “If you’re into someone, you fight for them. Look at me, I traveled halfway around the world for the woman I love.” I shake my head, turning to throw my empty bottle in the trash. As much as Jack can be a pain in my ass, he is right about one thing. If someone’s worth hanging on to, you do it. And even though I’d been unsure of his motives when he showed back up here after fourteen years, talking shit and acting like he was king of the fucking world, I do have to hand it to him. Not only does he know his way around a vineyard, but he’s a hard worker too. And he absolutely adores Lauren. Always putting her first, above everything and everyone else. It’s obvious to everyone that those two were meant to be together and I do like how much she smiles now, how happy he’s made her since he showed up and stuck around. Plus, his orchard and cider house has been a brilliant idea. It’s definitely going to boost tourism and money to this place, all of which will only help Ellen and Lauren. But as much as I did like Caitlyn, I knew things weren’t working between us. What we had was nothing compared to what I can see Jack and Lauren, or even Ellen and Will have. It’s like Caitlyn and I were just going through the motions in the end and I’d barely put up a fight when she’d given me an ultimatum, asking me to choose between this place or her. It didn’t even feel like a choice to me. Somerville’s is where I’ve grown up. I’ve spent the better part of my life

working at this place and even though I know it isn’t mine, I still can’t help but feel like this is where I belong. Ellen and Lauren are like family to me and they’ve always been good to me, letting me build a small place at the far edge of their property, overlooking the vines and the small lake they have. Plus, I enjoy my job and the work I do here, and I love the people I work with… even Jack, mostly. “Maybe you should try getting on Tinder or something?” Jack suggests, still grinning. “Fuck off,” I tell him, unable to stop the laugh. “Grinder then?” “No seriously, fuck off.” Jack laughs. “What? Get some action, relieve a little tension? It’ll make you less grumpy.” “I’m not fucking grumpy,” I repeat, just as Oscar struts into the workroom. He holds up a hand to wave at me before walking toward Jack. I watch as the two of them go through this weird ass handshake ritual they always do, before Oscar turns and leans against the bench, his arms crossed over his chest just like Jack. I shake my head at the two of them. “You know he’s actually morphing into you now, don’t you?” Oscar and Jack both grin as they glance at each other before turning back to me. “Okay, no Tinder, no Grinder. What about something else?” I shake my head as Oscar says, “What’s Grinder?” “Oh, fuck me,” I mutter as Jack starts laughing. “Nothing you need to know about just yet,” he says, moving to cover both of Oscar’s ears. “Come on, live a little, Tommy,” he says now. “There’s this new app that’s all the rage. You get a month’s free trial. Why don’t you give it a

shot?” “I don’t need help getting laid,” I say, glaring at him. “Now if you don’t mind, some of us have work to do. The new guys are starting over at Apple Jacks today and I gotta go make sure they know what they’re doing.” Jack removes his hands from Oscar’s ears who looks up at him with a legit what the fuck look on his face that comes squarely from his mom and aunt. The kid is a laugh, he and his sister Olivia, and they definitely make the place interesting. “Shit, yeah I forgot they were starting today. I’ll head over with you,” Jack says, just as his phone rings. “No worries, I’ll see you up there,” I say, heading out of the shed as Jack smirks at me. It takes me a second to realize I’ve just used one of his catchphrases. His weird Aussie sayings apparently rubbing off on all of us.

As I head over to the work cars parked out front of the sheds, I cross paths with Penny, who’s obviously heading in to start work at the tasting room. She gives me a wave and a grin as she calls out, “Heading into work now, Tommy!” Obviously giving me shit after I called her out earlier. I find myself smiling back at her, even as I’m shaking my head and checking my watch with mock exaggeration. “About time,” I shout back. She pokes her tongue out at me and I swear my fucking dick actually twitches as I watch her disappear into the main building. There’s no denying she’s hot. She’s all long legs and tanned skin and this long dark brown hair that I’ve definitely thought about wrapping my hands around as I pulled her head back to expose her neck. But she’s also like ten years younger than me and a co-worker, so definitely offlimits. Still, I can’t deny there haven’t been a few times I’ve caught myself checking her out or fantasizing about bending her over the counter in the tasting room whenever I’ve walked in there and found her leaning over it as she does some paperwork.

“Jesus, Tommy, maybe you do need to get laid,” I mutter to myself, scrubbing a hand over my face as I reach for my phone, which I discover is not in my pocket, but sitting back on the bench in the workroom. I stop and turn to go back, but see Jack now jogging toward me, a huge grin on his face and his hand outstretched, my phone in its grip. “Here, you forgot this,” he says, shoving it at me. “Thanks,” I reply, sliding it into my pocket as we both walk toward one of the work trucks that we’ll take over to the cider house. “No worries, mate,” Jack says, sliding into the enger side. He used to get in on that side when he first moved here, thinking he was getting into the driver’s side, but he’s gotten used to how things are different now. Doesn’t stop me giving him shit about it though, pretty much every time the two of us drive somewhere. “So, we have four new guys starting today,” I remind him. “I know,” he says, as he flicks through the folder in his hands. “You wanna take them through the brewing process you have planned or start with the fruit picking?” Jack shrugs, almost as if he’s only half listening. “Let’s do fruit first.” “Okay,” I reply, as we head over to the other property. I park outside the main shed, glad to see that all four of the new guys have arrived and are standing around getting to know one another. We get out and introduce ourselves to them, even though we all met during the interview process. I let Jack take them through the plan for the day because despite how hands on I am around this place, it’s still his property. After, Jack reminds them all to pay attention to my instruction, before turning to me. “By the way, I installed that new app you were asking about on your phone. name is blue balls, all lowercase and is tommy needs pussy, again, all lowercase.” Then he turns and walks off, whistling as though he doesn’t have a care in the world.

I want to go after him, grab him and ask what the fuck, but I’m too busy trying to figure out if these new recruits have heard what he just said to me. Thankfully they are all too busy shooting the shit and looking around at their new workplace and by the time I turn back, Jack has disappeared inside. “Motherfucker,” I mutter to myself, before turning and taking these boys out to the fields.

By the time I get back to my house, the sun is just starting to set, the long summer nights balmy and calm. Kicking off my boots and throwing my dirty work clothes into the laundry, I take a long hot shower before grabbing a beer and heading out to my back porch. I built this house on the far edge of Ellen and Lauren’s property about four years ago, on a hill that looks down over the vines and the lake that sits in the middle. There are more vines on the other side of the lake and at the end of those are the two cottages on the property, one of which Jack and Lauren now live in. The orchard and cider house are beyond that, which means I’m far enough away from everyone that it’s quiet and peaceful. Caitlyn never lived out here with me, claimed it was too quiet, too boring. She’d had a place in Napa, but wanted to move to San Francisco, claiming she needed more of a life. When she’d asked me to decide between Somerville’s and her, I knew that meant deciding between staying here or moving with her. Like I said, it hadn’t felt like much of a choice at the time. Still didn’t now. And last I’d heard she’d left Napa, so I guess it hadn’t been a tough choice for her either. Just as I sit down on one of the wooden deck chairs, my phone pings. Not recognizing the sound, I pull it from my pocket, taking a sip of my beer before opening up the home page. And there, sitting right in the middle of it, literally mocking me with its presence, is the dating app Jack installed. Shaking my head, I move to delete it, but before I do, it pings again, a notification flashing up on my screen that says you have a new match. “What the fuck?” I mutter, my thumb hovering over the app. Quickly glancing

around, as though Jack is somehow fucking with me, I hit the app and open it. When I do, the profile Jack created for me fills the screen. As my eyes scroll over it, I see the asshole has actually been pretty nice in what he’s said, despite the name and he used when he created it. There’s no picture associated with it though and I realize it’s actually a picture-free app, supposedly designed to match people based on their personalities. But more surprising than that is the number six that’s next to the button that says matches. “Six matches?” I ask myself, taking another sip of my beer. Glancing around again, I swallow hard before saying fuck it and clicking the button to open it.

Chapter Three

Penny

By the time I arrive home after work, I’ve forgotten I’d ed the dating app Jack suggested. Not only did I it in my lake-induced calm, I created a damn profile, albeit not really an honest one, but still a profile. They recommend creating a name rather than using your actual name, and obviously there are no pictures, but even more interesting is it asks you to build a relationship with other s without discussing the normal small talk related things. No job titles listed or your age, only an age range. And it’s pretty damn broad. The app is designed to almost encourage secrecy, to allow people to get to know each other before moving forward with the whole in-person meet up. Nothing ever has to come of it and the added bonus is it’s free for the first month. If it’s a total bust, I’ll cancel and call it done. I’ll swear off dating again for the millionth time like always. I collapse on the couch, exhausted and ready to have a glass of wine rather than being the one serving it, but before I get up again, I take a quick look at my phone. And there it is, right there on the first page, the Mystery Matchmaker app and glowing bright red in the corner is the number six. Six fucking matches already. This thing is either magic or a total nightmare. I hover my finger over the app, daring myself to click it and check out what lurks behind that little red number. It’s not like I’m going to be hit with shirtless guys taking selfies in their toothpaste splattered bathroom mirrors or some selfabsorbed asshole posing next to “his” Porsche only to find out later he used to work at a Porsche dealership. “Used to” being the operative words here. This app eliminates all those cringe-worthy moments; those ones that make you embarrassed by proxy and make you question what the hell you’re actually doing.

As much as I want to know what or who is hiding behind that little number, I can’t bring myself to find out just yet. I’m hungry and tired and I feel like a glass of wine and some food will pair well with some scrolling and matchmaking. I grab a bottle of rosé from my fridge, annoyed that my tiny pasta sauce smelling apartment doesn’t have room for a wine chiller, something I never thought I’d ever find myself thinking, and I pour myself a glass. Heating up some leftovers, bound and determined not to jump right into the app the moment I sit down. I let the microwave run longer than necessary in the hopes it quells my obsessive need to get rid of that little devil of a red number. Something about it creeping there on my phone, reminding me and annoying me, makes it nearly impossible to ignore. I flop down, my wine in my hand and my leftovers on the table beside me, still too hot as I casually take a sip from my glass. A second sip and then a third and by the fourth it’s a gulp and before I know it the glass is empty and my finger is clicking the app. Here we go. The first two are an instant hard with the names ladysman with its nefarious misspelling of ladies or he actually already belongs to some lady, and lookin2getlaid like he’s drawn inspiration from the second movie in the Fast and the Furious franchise. “Nope and nope,” I mutter out loud, already hating Jack for even thinking this was a viable option for meeting someone. It’s clear the idiots have ed in droves because the third isn’t any better, boasting the name HarryBSac. This literally has to be some kind of joke and I can’t help but wonder if Jack created six different profiles each more bizarrely named than the next and somehow found my profile. “He’s gotta be fucking with me, right?” I again mutter to the empty room, talking only to the four walls and myself. I don’t even bother looking more closely at their profiles, just immediately clicking the little black X that blocks the first three guys from matching with me again.

“No thank you,” I say, just as my cat Seymour comes strolling out of the bedroom all aloof and lazy. I flash my phone at him. “Can you believe this shit? There’s a reason these guys are single. Do you think they realize that?” He meows at me, a low rumble as if to say, “Listen lady, up until this morning you were living with one of these misogynistic douche bags.” “Don’t be so judgy, Seymour,” I hiss back, as if talking to my cat is somehow better than scrolling through the rest of these winners. On to number four, but again it’s a hard with the name nickelbackfan2. Mom Rock? Aww hell no. And even worse, it looks like nickelbackfan1 was already taken and that has me pausing for a second to think about that anomaly. “Should I just give up now?” I question Seymour, his little face staring up at me. Meowing again, he begins to paw at my plate of leftovers on the side table. “You don’t care what I do unless it’s to share food with you.” I let out an annoyed huff, taking my anger out on my innocent cat when I should be dumping this app and sticking to my plan of being boyfriend-free. But I can’t just let this die here. It’ll bother me till the end of time if I don’t at least see this through till the end. When I’m ninety years old and living with my ten cats, I’ll be lamenting those last two matches. “What if number five was my soulmate?” I’ll whine out in my shaky old lady voice. My roommate at the nursing home calling out, “What?” because she turned her hearing aid down too low. Holy shit, this is what my life has become and I’ve only been single for like five minutes. After these last two I’m going to bed because nothing good can come of what’s left. Number five isn’t my soulmate by any means, but at least his name isn’t something gross. He saved that for his bio where he references his ten-inch penis and all I can do is shake my head. Ten inches my ass. More like ten centimeters, I’m sure. This is even more exhausting than being on my feet all day in the tasting room, entertaining guests and making constant small talk. Don’t get me wrong, I love that part of my job, but it is tiring coming up with constant conversation pieces

and making sure people are having a great time. It would be nice for a change to have someone want to know a little more about me, to have someone interested in what I have to offer versus always being the one offering. I click on number six, barely looking at the screen as I turn on the TV and it begins to drone mindlessly in the background. I glance down at the name and instantly feel a smile tug at my lips. C.Grizwold is intriguing and I click his profile and find the quote, “You didn’t order the Metallic Pea?” and now I’m laughing out loud. Number six just may be my soulmate and I notice he’s currently online. Just as I’m about to click the messaging section of the app, it chimes out indicating I have a message. I startle a little wondering if this could be some creep-o with an equally disgusting name or if this could in fact be C.Grizwold, my new favorite person just based off his love of National Lampoon’s Vacation. The coincidence is a little uncanny and I wonder if he matched with me because of my name. I’m kind of liking this whole not knowing what the person looks like and matching based on compatibility because right now, it’s actually working. But when I open the messages it’s a dick pick from someone going by the name of boobiesRlife. Well, he’s got one thing right, boobs are life ing, like as in they supply food to babies. What a fucking moron. I immediately shoot him a message back asking if his grandma knows he sends unsolicited pictures of his tiny penis to unsuspecting women on the Internet? He returns the message calling me a cunt and prude, which is kind of the highlight of my night and then he takes the trash out himself by blocking me. “Thank you!” I yell out, scaring Seymour back into the bedroom, not like he was any big anyway. I’m pretty sure he just sticks around for the free food. I should really give up, but I find myself intrigued by Clark Grizwold and wondering if I should just bite the bullet and message him. It’s obvious he either sought me out or we matched based on compatibility. I’m pretty sure I can guess his favorite movie.

I start to type out a message to him, but quickly delete it when it sounds a little too excited. I don’t want this guy to think I’m desperate, because I’m so not desperate. I’m so far from desperate that it lives in the next state. Scratch that, the next country. I try again, but the words just aren’t coming out right and as I delete it all over, the little message bubbles begin to float. I practically scream out loud, tossing my phone onto the floor and it slides under my TV stand. I’m a fucking shit show. I scramble on my hands and knees across the floor suddenly desperate to find my phone and see what this guy has to say. “Please don’t let it be a dick pic,” I say, sending up a plea to whatever god is the one that tells dudes to behave themselves. I wedge my hand under the TV stand, fishing around for my phone and when my hand finally lands on it, I slide it out slowly with my eyes closed. “Come on, Clark. Don’t be a smarmy douche canoe,” I murmur, thankful I live above a restaurant and no one can hear the weird conversation I’ve been having with myself all night. I turn the phone over and open up my eyes, the screen is black, and I laugh out loud at how completely idiotic I must look right now. When the damn thing finally recognizes my face, it opens and there in front of me is a message from C.Grizwold and it isn’t a picture of his flaccid penis. “Hallelujah!” I yell out, tossing a fist into the air. Score one for me because even if he turns out to be just as slimy as the rest of them, at least he didn’t shoot a picture of his wiener.

C.Grizwold: Gotta love the play on words, WineQueenFamilyTruckster. Guessing you like wine and my favorite movie.

Me: You serious, Clark?

C.Grizwold: Hahaha! I guess this app does know what it’s doing. You’re the first match I’ve had that I haven’t rolled my eyes at.

Me: Please, you’re the first match I’ve had that didn’t have something to do with getting laid in the name.

C.Grizwold: Guys are pretty much the biggest assholes on the planet. This is my apology for my gender.

Me: Thanks, I appreciate that. So, what is it that you do for a living?

C.Grizwold: I thought we were supposed to stay away from typical small talk?

Me: Whoops! You’re right... How about this... Do you have a job?

C.Grizwold: I do. How about you?

Me: I also do.

C.Grizwold: Well, score one for both of us because that seems to be quite the hurdle, so I hear.

We spend the next two hours chatting and learning about each other. It’s far more fun than I ever thought possible. He’s witty and smart and is quick with the oneliners, and I actually haven’t given a single thought to what he might look like. He makes me laugh which is something I can’t say ever happened with my past boyfriends. This guy may be worth a few more chats based on that alone.

Chapter Four

Tommy

I wake the next morning with a smile on my face as I reach for my phone to silence the alarm. Normally I wake up before it goes off, but today I haven’t, despite the good night’s sleep. As I do, I notice the notification on the Mystery Matchmaker app signaling a new message and my smile grows. Clicking open the app, I navigate to the messages section to see what my mystery match has sent. She must have sent it after we said goodnight last night, almost as though it was an afterthought.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: tell me something Clark, why do guys feel compelled to send dick pics all the time?

I laugh out loud, her question not what I was expecting as my fingers type out a quick response.

Me: no idea? Trying to prove a point? Trying to get laid? Because they’re idiots?

I immediately see the bubbles pop up to signify she’s responding, so I prop some pillows behind my head and wait to see what she has to say.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: early bird, huh? But do they not realize that it’s just plain stupid and only makes them look like try-hard losers?

Me: yep, you too? I don’t know, this is my first time doing this kind of thing, and like I said before, I apologize for my gender. We really have no clue most of the time.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Yep. You seem to…

Her comments make me pause, my thumb hovering over the screen as I try to figure out what to say in response. Clearly, had I gone with the stupid name Jack had given me, I never would have matched with this chick. Well, maybe we’d have matched, but I was damn sure we wouldn’t be chatting like this. I mean blue balls? For fuck’s sake, like that didn’t scream desperate loser looking to get laid. I mean yeah, I was looking to get laid, obviously, but not at the expense of my pride or integrity. And even though random hook-ups and one-night stands aren’t really my thing, I’m not opposed to a regular booty call situation if that’s what this girl might be into.

Me: so I guess this would be the wrong time to send a dick pic? Me: ;) Me: joking obviously…

I don’t know why I respond like this, only that it feels natural. We’ve had this easy banter going ever since we started chatting last night and even though I have absolutely no intention of actually sending her a dick pic, I’m not above playing around with her about it.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Idk…would you?

“Holy fuck,” I breathe out as my dick actually hardens beneath the covers. “Is she serious?” I don’t even know who I’m talking to or who I expect to actually answer me given I’m lying alone in bed in my otherwise empty house.

Me: you want one?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: maybe…

Me: I thought dick pics were a turn off??

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: as a first line of communication yeah…I mean shit, buy a girl a drink first.

I burst out laughing, scrubbing a hand over my face as I actually contemplate doing this. God knows now is the right time given my dick is as hard as a rock. Sure, it could be partly due to the standard morning wood, but a part of me knows it’s also due to this easy flirty banter wine queen and I have going on. Wine queen? Does that mean she likes wine or she works in the wine industry? Even though we both agreed to none of that bullshit small talk about jobs and stuff, I do know she lives in the area. When Jack had set this up for me, he made sure to set my match profile to a fifty mile radius, so it’s a safe bet this mystery girl lives in or around Napa. Fuck, do I already know her?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: hey, so I’m only joking…you don’t have to actually send me one, obviously…

Me: no, I’m just…thinking…

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: thinking…hard?

I could feel myself smiling like a motherfucker now, my dick growing impossibly harder as I type out a response.

Me: something’s hard, that’s for sure.

The conversation goes quiet. No response from wine queen and no bubbles to signify she’s even typing. I wait a few minutes, trying to decide if I’ve maybe crossed the line with my response. I’d thought we were good, both of us enjoying this easy flirtiness we’ve fallen into, but maybe I’ve misread the situation. God knows, it’s been a long fucking time since I had to pick up a woman.

Me: hey listen, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: NO! It’s cool, sorry, I just needed a minute there…

Me: a minute for?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: wouldn’t you like to know ;)

“Fuck me,” I mumble as I give in and my hand now moves below the covers to my dick. Did she seriously just get herself off to thoughts of my hard dick? The idea of her doing that turns me on and as I start to stroke myself, I start to wonder if I should not only send her a picture, but actually ask if she wants to come over.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: but…I gotta go, work calls. WineQueenFamilyTruckster: you still owe me a pic btw

She signs off after that, not responding to the simple goodbye I type back in response. Throwing my phone onto the bed, I let out a long groan, kicking the covers off as I close my eyes and try to imagine my mystery match and who she might be or what she might feel like lying here in this bed with me, her hand on my dick as she works me over.

I park my car out in front of the work sheds, grabbing my coffee mug from the center console, before walking into the main building to check on the list for today. “Morning,” I say as I head into Lauren’s office. “Hey, Tommy,” she calls back. “Here’s today’s schedule.” She hands me a typed-up list of all the things that need to get done today. Lauren’s always been meticulous and organized and it’s one of the many things I like about working here. “Thanks. How are you? Good?”

Lauren shoots me a weird look. “Yeah,” she replies, dragging the word out slowly. “You?” I flash her a smile. “Great, thanks,” I say before turning to Jack who has just walked in the room. “Jack,” I greet with a nod. “BB,” he shoots back with a grin. I stop, turning to look at him. “What did you say?” Jack’s grin widens. “BB, you know, short for blue—” I hold a hand up to stop him. “Got it. Thanks. No need for that though.” “Ohhhh,” Jack says, his eyes widening. “So, the app worked, huh? And you got yourself some—” “I’m going now,” I say, cutting him off as I walk out of the office, having no desire to discuss my sex life or lack thereof with either of my bosses. The last thing I need is those two on my case about it. As I head down the corridor toward the tasting room, I spy Penny coming toward me, her head down, her eyes on her phone as she walks. I move to the side to let her , but for some weird reason, she does the same and before I can get out of the way, she slams straight into me, knocking my coffee and her phone to the floor. “Shit!” she practically yells as she crouches down, scrambling for her phone. “You okay?” I ask, reaching for her elbow and helping her up. Her cheeks are a little flushed and when she looks up at me, I watch as it darkens, making my pulse thud. But when she pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, it sends a spike of lust straight to my dick. She’s your co-worker, you idiot, calm down. “Sorry,” she says, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Wasn’t watching where I was going.”

“Clearly,” I tease, raising a brow at her. “Something interesting on there?” I add, lifting my chin toward the phone in her hand. Penny swallows hard as that blush now spreads, moving down her neck and across her chest, which is barely hidden by the low-cut Somerville Winery t-shirt she wears. Something about the contrast between her flushed skin and the stark whiteness of her shirt has me practically salivating. She’s also ten years younger than you, ? God, I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me. It’s like a tiny bit of flirting via a stupid dating app that I didn’t even , let alone want to use, and suddenly I’m a fucking mess, thinking and saying all sorts of stupid things. “Umm, yeah, something like that,” she mumbles, sliding her phone into her back pocket as though she doesn’t want me to see whatever it was she was looking at. “It wasn’t p—” “Penny?” Lauren’s voice cuts off my question, which is a good thing, because I have absolutely no business asking it. “Yeah, coming,” she calls back, her voice husky and low, the words actually making me groan as she brushes past me and disappears into Lauren’s office. Taking a deep breath, I walk away from whatever the fuck that was and outside toward the work sheds and all the jobs I have to do, mentally reminding myself that Penny is not only completely off-limits, but also someone I am most definitely not interested in. “Focus on your mystery match, you idiot,” I mumble to myself as I realize my coffee mug is still lying on the floor outside Lauren’s office. “And get your mind off your co-worker.”

Chapter Five

Penny

That was probably the strangest interaction I’ve ever had with Tommy and I’m still watching him from Lauren’s office, totally distracted. I haven’t heard a word she’s said which is so incredibly rude of me. “I’m sorry,” I say, diverting my eyes from the window and my attention back to Lauren, who is my boss and should probably be chastising me for ignoring her. But in true Lauren form, she just laughs, shaking her head. “You know, he’s single,” she says, her eyebrows going up as she basically sings the last part of her sentence. “Really? I don’t think you’ve ever mentioned that,” I respond, faking my reaction with a bit of sarcasm. “And anyway, I ed that dating app Jack suggested,” I sheepishly it, biting down on my bottom lip to try to hide my embarrassment. “Oh my god, you’ll take advice from Jack, but you won’t take my advice and go on one date with Tommy?” “Come on, Lu. You realize Tommy hates me, right? He thinks I’m an idiot. I mean he’s never come right out and said that, but you’ve seen the way he looks at me. I’m pretty sure he thinks he loses brain cells just by talking to me. His face is always just so...” “I think that’s just his face,” Lauren says, sort of joking, but also defending him. “He’s really great once you get to know him, I swear. He always seems to choose the wrong girls.” She stops, hitting me with a cheeky little smile. “Kinda like someone else I know.” She points a finger at me and winks. “You’re ridiculous,” I reply, blowing her off and attempting to continue the conversation she called me in here for. “So, what did you need? You called me in here.”

“Oh yeah. So, with Apple Jacks in full production, Jack and I were thinking we could add it as a bonus tasting when people purchase a variety tasting here in the tasting room? We already have samples added to the restaurant and are getting great .” “I think it sounds like a great idea. It’ll really get people interested early and paired with the Somerville name, people will already trust the brand.” “Exactly, but it will add a little more to your workload. We’re asking people to fill out a survey afterward and we’re using that data to make changes and decide what we’ll produce.” “And I’m guessing you need me to out the surveys and collect them?” “Yes,” Lauren starts, stalling out a little. “And I was hoping you’d be able to help us total everything at the end of the night. I promise I’m not asking you to do it for free. Just add it to your hours, or you can seriously say no.” “No problem. It’s not like I have anything else to do in the evening with me being single and all.” Lauren laughs at my comment, shaking her head. “I thought you ed that dating app? No dick pic suitors yet?” “Plenty, but no one of interest,” I lie, not wanting to share with anyone that the guy I’ve been talking with is pretty great. I’m still that loser magnet and I’m waiting for the wheels to fall off. If it lasts more than a few weeks, I may consider it then. We chat mindlessly for a few minutes, the tasting room is still closed for another hour and since I arrived early as always, I’m ready to go well in advance. But I should still head back there just in case we have some early arrivals or some walk-ups. I’m just about to head back to the tasting room when I’m hit with an idea. “Hey!” I call out and Lauren and I both let out a giggle at my unnecessary loudness. “What?” she yells back and now we’re laughing a little harder.

“So, I was just hit with this random idea and it could be total crap, but what if after someone fills out the survey, they’re entered into a contest to come to a soft opening or a party or something at Apple Jacks before the public? It would be a great way to encourage more people to fill out the survey. We know everyone loves the free booze, but then they tend to not follow through with the survey. This could be—” Lauren cuts me off, grabbing me by the shoulders and giving me a shake. “Oh my god! That’s genius! I figured the free cider and getting to try it before the general public would be a draw, but this could up it even more.” She grabs for her phone but keeps talking. “I knew I hired you for a reason. All young and cute and so goddamn smart. I gotta find Jack, and hey,” she says, stopping in the doorway that leads outside, “don’t start giving away free cider just yet. I’m gonna work with our graphics person to throw together some posters and see if I can get some social media posts up.” “Got it, boss.” “Thank you, Pen. We’re really lucky to have you on our team.” She disappears out the door and my heart swells with pride. I’ve always loved my job here and have always felt appreciated, but today I feel even more a part of this little family. I left Massachusetts when I was only twenty-one. I hadn’t really done anything but waitress and flit from job to job never feeling appreciated. I couldn’t pin down exactly how going to college would ever benefit me since I couldn’t pick a major and it was always a bone of contention with my parents. They weren’t super ive when I left, and they still aren’t now. I didn’t take the path they assumed I would take. I wasted their hard-earned money and didn’t even leave college with a degree, and when I packed up my car with my tattooed, surly boyfriend I think they were happy to see me go. Working in the tasting room at Somerville’s isn’t a career according to them, but today as I stand here in Lauren’s office, I realize this is exactly where I’m supposed to be. It’s a place where I’m celebrated for sharing ideas. It’s a place where I feel welcomed and comfortable to be myself, where it doesn’t matter if I have a degree or if I just have ideas. It’s all honored just the same. I look down at my watch and see I still have some time before I need to open so

I decide to take a walk. It’s been a great morning so far. Last night when I walked into my apartment, tired and crabby, I thought I’d be ending the night falling asleep on the couch with the TV on. But it went a different direction and chatting with my favorite match on Mystery Matchmaker was great and then finding him up early this morning was even better. Now I’ve got this idea that Lauren is planning to run with, and I know it will be amazing. Watching her plan weddings has always been one of my favorite things about working at the vineyard and I know this party for Apple Jacks will be even more amazing. My phone chimes out with a text as I make my way down by the lake. I pull it from my pocket and find Lauren’s name on the screen.

Lauren: Jack is all in, but he wants you to work on the planning with me. You up for it?

I nearly cheer out loud, not even believing this is happening and I respond immediately.

Me: oh my fucking god, yes!

Me: Sorry. I shouldn’t have sworn in a text to my boss. That was super unprofessional.

Me: I’m just really excited.

Lauren: You know I don’t care. I’m so excited too. I’m going to see if I can bring

Ellen in too, but sometimes she’s just too damn stuffy.

I find myself laughing out loud, wanting to find someone to share this news with. I’m not just the girl who runs the tasting room anymore. I’m about to plan the grand fucking opening of Somerville’s latest venture and it’s going to be epic. I walk over to the little worn-out fence that separates the Somerville property from the Apple Jacks’ land, watching some of the new guys as they listen to Tommy give them directions. A few minutes later they disperse and Tommy is left in the field swatting at a few bees that seem to love the rotting apples. For some reason the bees don’t seem to fancy the rotten grapes as much and I try not to laugh as Tommy is now swatting and jogging away from them. He looks over his shoulder and stumbles a little, catching himself on the fence and landing a few feet down from where I’m standing. “Shit!” he yells, slapping a hand on his neck. “Fucker got me. The bees are fucking out of control over here.” He has yet to look at me, but I can see the ruddiness of his cheeks as it spreads to his ears. He’s trying not to show how embarrassed he is. He’s obviously a total hardass and being scared of bees doesn’t exactly fit with his persona. Something about him is kind of cute and endearing right now. I walk over to where he’s standing, rubbing furiously at his neck where the bee got him. “Let me take a look,” I say, my hand reaching over to move his away. When my fingers connect with his warm skin he shies away. “I’m fine,” he says gruffly, pulling back just a little. “Stop being an idiot, Tommy. I’m not going to try to kiss you or anything.” I roll my eyes and dump an ice cube from my water bottle into my hand. I press it to his neck where the sting is starting to swell just slightly. “Keep this on here for just a little bit. It will help.” “Thanks,” he grumbles, but I swear I see a small smile form on his lips.

“Oh my god, did you just smile at me?” “Well, I mean you’re doing something nice. I think that’s the way most people respond.” “Except you hate me and think I’m some insipid twit who’s only good at entertaining people with mindless conversation,” I say, feeling suddenly bolder than normal and I chalk it up to Lauren giving me more responsibility. “When did I ever say that?” he asks, sounding slightly appalled. “Well, I guess you didn’t, but I always get the feeling you don’t like me.” He just shakes his head, not responding with anything that indicates what I’ve said is bullshit. “The bees suck out here. I guess I should start carrying a water bottle full of ice,” he says, seemingly out of nowhere. “Or you could just learn to keep bees,” I say, feeling like I’m full of ideas today. “Hey, that’s not a bad idea,” Tommy responds, nodding pensively as he thinks about what I just said. “You know anything about beekeeping?” “Not a damn thing so good luck with that,” I retort back. “You can keep the ice cube. I gotta get back to work.” I toss a thumb over my shoulder in the direction of the tasting room. “Hope your bee sting goes down.” “Thanks,” he replies, a bit of hesitation still in his voice and when I look back over my shoulder, he’s still watching me. There’s something about him that I find familiar and it’s not just from working with him for the last couple of years. There was warmth to his smile and for a split second I didn’t feel like he didn’t like me but that he actually was enjoying me being around. Or maybe he’s allergic to bees and was trying to get rid of me before he had to thigh jab himself with epinephrine. Whatever it was, it still feels like everything’s coming up Milhouse today!

Chapter Six

Tommy

“Oi, you lot, in here!” The guys all turn to me, confused looks on their faces because clearly, they haven’t yet learned the Aussie lingo that the rest of us have been forced to try and understand for the last two years. “He wants us inside,” I explain, rolling the last of the cider barrels into the shed. “Let’s go.” The four new guys follow me into the newly finished cider house tasting room. It’s almost ready to go, even though we don’t open for another couple of weeks. It looks different to the tasting room at Somerville’s, Jack putting his own mark on things, but it’s no less amazing. This room is exposed brick and wooden beams, rustic hardwood floors and mismatched wooden furniture and chesterfield couches. There’s a huge log fireplace over by the far wall, with a long bar stretching the length of the opposite wall. Cider barrels are stacked randomly around the room and there are black and white photos on the walls that showcase the changes Jack has made since he took over. There’s even an outdoor area that has a huge central fire pit surrounded by deck chairs. The whole place is like an awesome old bar or kick ass man cave, so basically, awesome. “Hey, come and have a taste,” Jack says grinning as we all head inside. We walk over to the bar, the four guys taking a stool, as I stand, and Jack pours us all a tasting tray of ciders. “Place looks amazing, Jack,” I say, sliding the trays down to the guys. Jack grins at me. “Bet that was hard for you to say.” “Fuck off,” I say, shaking my head with a smile. Jack chuckles. “So, listen, we’re going to start introducing these tasting trays

over at Somerville’s to try and get some from people on what they think of the cider.” “Sounds like a good idea,” I say, lifting the crisp apple cider for a taste. “Shit, that’s good.” Jack’s grin widens. “I know,” he says, and I roll my eyes. “Anyway, in order to get people to give us , we’re offering exclusive entry into a competition for them to attend the launch party of this place.” I finish off the apple cider, nodding as I replace it on the tray and reach for the pear one. “Smart. It will encourage them to fill it in.” “Exactly,” Jack says. “It was Penny’s idea.” I let out a cough as my cider suddenly goes down the wrong way. “What?” I splutter. Jack straightens, crossing his arms over his chest as he grins at me from behind the bar. “It was Penny’s idea. A pretty good one, huh?” “Sure,” I say shrugging. “You know—” “Leave it, Jack,” I say, cutting him off as I hold up a hand. I turn to walk away, having no interest in engaging in any form of discussion about Penny, much less one with Jack. We might get along now and could even be considered friends, but I’m still not going there with him. Just as I move to walk away though, Penny walks through the door with Lauren, the two of them laughing and chatting, Penny holding a camera in her hands. “Speak of the devil,” Jack murmurs as he walks out from behind the bar and heads over to them. “Lulu!” he shouts, wrapping his arms around her as he bends her backward and kisses her dramatically. Lauren laughs as she clings to Jack, pretending to push him away even though anyone with a pair of eyes and a brain cell can tell she loves it. She doesn’t even care about the nickname he gave her anymore or that others have started using it.

“Hey,” she says, her face flushed when he finally lets her come up for air. “We’re here for some pictures for the competition to use on social media and stuff.” “Great,” Jack says, his arm around her shoulders as he leads Lauren and Penny toward the bar. “You can take some with these guys if you want?” He throws a hand in our general direction before he tugs Lauren out the back toward his office. I don’t even want to think about what they’re about to do in there. I turn back to the new guys and notice all four of them are staring at Penny who’s busy putting her stuff down at the other end of the bar, oblivious to the way they are looking at her. I clear my throat, suddenly pissed off. “Eyes here,” I growl, moving to stand between them and Penny. One of them rolls his eyes as someone else groans and mutters. “Just looking, geez.” “No looking, no talking, hands off,” I say, hands on my hips. “Penny is an employee here and off-limits, got it?” “Seriously?” the one who rolled his eyes asks, incredulously. “Yes, seriously,” I confirm. “There is no fraternizing with fellow employees. Either here or at Somerville’s.” This isn’t exactly true. I mean Jack and Lauren are obviously married and they work together, but these guys don’t need to know that. More than anything, I just need him to stay away from Penny. He rolls his eyes again and I swear I want to smack the back of his head. But then he glances to my left, a huge smile on his face as he leans forward and says, “Hey, I’m Dylan,” holding out his hand toward Penny who has somehow materialized beside me. “Hi,” she says, smiling. “Penny. Nice to meet you.” Now I just want to punch this fucker and march him out the door, firing his ass before he so much as utters one more word to her. But I don’t, instead turning to Penny as I ask, “What are you doing here?” Her smile disappears and I immediately feel like a total dick. “Taking some photos for the competition we’re running for the—”

“Yeah, Jack told me you came up with it,” I say, cutting her off. Fuck, what the hell is wrong with me? “It’s…it’s a great idea.” Penny blinks once, her eyes locked on mine as she opens her mouth to say something, before snapping it shut again. I clear my throat, wondering why the fuck I’m suddenly acting like such an asshole toward her. Normally the two of us can manage a perfectly normal and civil conversation, even if we don’t exactly shoot the shit or anything. But now, now I can’t seem to say anything right. “How’s the bee sting?” she suddenly asks, and when I look up, I can see she’s smirking at me. “I’ll live,” I say with a chuckle. Penny finally smiles and I swear something weird happens and I have to look away. “Alright guys, let’s clear out so Penny can take some shots.” “Actually,” she says. “I’d like to grab some with you guys too.” “What? Dressed like this?” I ask, pointing to my filthy work clothes. Penny gives me a once over, her eyes moving slowly down my body before making their way back up again. And if I thought things were weird before, now they are just downright strange. “Yeah,” she eventually says, her voice a little husky. “It’ll make it look authentic.” Penny spends about thirty minutes getting us to pose around the bar, pretending as though we’re having drinks after work, laughing and chatting like we’re all friends. The guys all ignore my warning, flirting shamelessly with Penny any chance they can get. She seems to enjoy it though, laughing and talking with them as though they’ve all known each other for ages. Maybe because they’re all young, it’s easier, but for me, it feels awkward as shit, especially knowing she’s watching our every move. When she finally calls time on her photoshoot, I exhale a sigh of relief. “Right, you guys, with me,” I say, waving a hand as I head out the door. “We need to collect some of this rotten fruit before any of you clock off.”

Behind me comes the collective sound of moans, which makes me smile. I ignore them though, glad I can get back at them now because that’s what these fuckers deserve after ignoring my warning to leave Penny alone. As I lead them out of the tasting room though, not bothering to say goodbye to Penny, I hear her shout, “Watch out for bees!”

After work, I head home to take a quick shower before jumping back in my truck and making the short drive into Napa. I don’t often come into town, usually only when I’m running errands for work or myself, but it’s a place I like to visit. It’s small enough not to be too crazy and for the life of me I can’t understand why Caitlyn wanted to get away from here. As I get out of the car and head toward the main street, I pull my phone from my pocket, opening up the matchmaker app and going back to my conversation from this morning. Our exchange makes me smile and as I head down the street, I decide to send her a message, see if maybe she’s willing to do a little exchange.

Me: so…if I were to give you that dick pic you long for, would you be willing to trade me a titty pic?

I hit send, sliding my phone back into my pocket, not expecting a reply. But a pinging sound signals a new message and grinning, I pull my phone from my pocket.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Ok first of all…I “long” for a dick pic from you? That’s a bold statement, cheeky boy! WineQueenFamilyTruckster: second of all…titty pic? Is that a thing? WineQueenFamilyTruckster: But…I could be persuaded ;)

I let out a loud laugh, startling an older woman who’s walking past me. Coughing out an apology, I type out a response.

Me: don’t pretend you don’t want it…I can guarantee it will NOT disappoint.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Wow! Feeling cocky, huh?

Me: quietly confident ;)

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: alright, when’s this dirty little trade gonna happen then?

Me: well, I’m in public right now and not keen on getting arrested for public indecency…

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: you sure not now? Could be fun…

Me: Lol, but no. You free tonight?

I’m staring at my phone, watching the bubbles that dance to signify she’s writing a reply. They pop up and disappear several times and I can’t tell if she’s giving me detailed instructions or writing and deleting her response. It kind of feels like we’re setting up a date, even if neither of us is going to see anything more than

one very specific part of each other’s bodies.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: My schedule is clear…looks like we have a date

I feel myself smile at her words, even as I wonder if she’s really going to do it. Fuck, am I going to do it? I’ve never sent anyone a dick pic before and the only thing that makes me feel somewhat okay about doing this now is we have no idea who each other is. I start typing out a response, but before I can send it, I suddenly crash into someone coming out of one of the stores on main street. “Fuck!” I shout, stumbling back a little as the other person yells, “Shit!” I look up to find Penny standing in front of me, a dazed look on her face as she holds her phone in one hand and a book in the other. “Jesus, twice in one day,” I say without thinking. Penny furrows her brows at me. “For the record, this one was not my fault,” she says, jabbing me in the chest with her finger. “Do you know how annoying it is when people walk while on their phones?” I roll my eyes, sliding my phone into my pocket. “Sorry, phone police,” I say, sarcastically. Penny shoots me a smirk as she holds the book she’s carrying out to me. “And to think I was doing something nice for you,” she says, as she shoves it in my hands before brushing past me. “Later, jerk.” Too shocked to move, I glance over my shoulder as Penny walks away, not bothering to look back or acknowledge me. When she disappears around the corner, I turn back to see what she’s given me after I was once again a total asshole to her. A book on beekeeping.

Fuck.

Chapter Seven

Penny

I guess I totally misread our interaction today and his comment about the bees. I thought I’d be nice and grab a book about beekeeping, sort of as a joke, but also as a way to keep the friendly conversation going between us. Lesson learned to just keep things only work related with Mr. Hot and Cold. It’s not like I’m planning to ask him out on a date even though that’s exactly what Lauren wants me to do. But I won’t let Tommy and his crabby attitude ruin my evening. I have a date tonight. Well, a virtual date, but still a date. I love this playful banter we have going on, but I’m not entirely certain I’m on board with this whole nudes thing. I know that’s basically become the norm now, but I don’t want my tits or my cat out there for all the world to see, because let’s be honest here, everyone knows that shit isn’t staying private. I pick up dinner from the restaurant below my apartment and trudge up the stairs, my thoughts suddenly consumed with Tommy and his reaction to seeing me outside the bookstore. A part of me wants to call him out on his bullshit the way I did when I tried to help him with his bee sting. But then I figure I should cut him some slack. He doesn’t owe me and from what I’ve gathered from Lauren, his longtime girlfriend dumped him recently. She wasn’t a fan of the vineyard, his job or the fact that he lives on the Somerville property. She wanted more than he would ever be able to give her and I guess looking at it that way, I would probably be a little bitter too. I know a thing or two about not living up to expectations. I push it all to the side with a reminder to maybe be a little nicer to Tommy. I guess I have no idea what he’s going through and maybe his breakup was rough even if it was necessary. I’m the one who was swearing off men, labeling an entire gender as douche bags, he could be doing the same thing for all I know. I pull out my phone, a nervous flutter in my chest as I open the Mystery

Matchmaker app, worried I’ll be confronted with C.Grizwold’s dick pic, something I joked about and possibly even led him to believe I was interested in. I’m pretty sure this is where I go wrong in most relationships...the lack of honesty. I have no interest in seeing this guy’s penis pop up on my screen. I would much prefer to see it in person long after we’ve spent some time getting to know each other. I will not adapt to what someone else wants anymore. This is the new Penny. The one who only dates guys who are worth her time. I have no idea why I’m talking about myself in the third person. I swear between this app and Tommy, I feel like I’ve lost my fucking mind. There’s a message from C.Grizwold when I open the app and I literally breathe out a hard sigh of relief. There’s no picture of his wiener, which means I will definitely not be sending him a picture of my boobs in a bathroom mirror. In my mind I immediately move C.Grizwold from the “maybe” side to the “good” side. He was already halfway there, but I still wasn’t certain.

C.Grizwold: So, I know we said we were doing that whole titty/dick pic, but I’ve gotta be real with you. That’s not my thing and I should’ve just been honest with you from the start.

Me: Well, that’s a relief because I was seriously about to send you this same message. It’s not that I don’t have great boobs. I ed this app to try to meet someone I could connect with beyond that.

C.Grizwold: If we’re putting it all out there, I didn’t even this app.

Me: What do you mean? You’re obviously messaging me and connected with me

based on your profile.

C.Grizwold: Yeah, I know and it’s all good now, but it was a friend of mine who created my profile.

Me: It was a friend of mine who told me I should .

C.Grizwold: I guess we owe our friends a thank you. Although I don’t think you would’ve even considered me if you had seen my original name.

Me: Now I’m intrigued...

C.Grizwold: It was blueballs.

I’m immediately laughing because he would have totally ended up in the pile of rejects. I’m sure if I had let Lauren or Jack set up my profile, I would’ve ended up with something horrible too.

Me: You are absolutely right that I would’ve never given you a chance, which would’ve been a serious letdown.

C.Grizwold: It would’ve been pretty disappointing if I had known you were who I’d meet.

He’s sweet but not over the top in the way that most asshole guys are in the beginning. They butter you up and make you think they’re amazing when in reality they’re huge jerks who give no fucks about you.

C.Grizwold: Well, when I say meet I mean virtually since we haven’t actually met.

Me: I’ve had better conversations with you than I have with most guys I’ve met in person. It’s a nice change. What are you up to tonight?

C.Grizwold: Not much. I was about to eat dinner and then read a little.

Me: Oh, you read? Not the norm I’d say. What are you reading?

C.Grizwold: Something for work so don’t get too excited that I’m some intellectual who can have philosophical conversations with you.

I’m just about to ask him what he does for a living, but I catch myself. It’s hard not to ask those basic questions that allow you to get to know someone, but in the end, they aren’t really important. It’s small talk that’s meant to make meeting someone easier, but with this guy, it’s different. I don’t want to do the basics. I want to learn more.

Me: What’s something you always wanted to learn but never did?

It doesn’t take me long to come up with a list of questions. Part of my job while working in the tasting room is to engage customers, make them feel comfortable as if they’re chatting with a friend. In the end the main goal of my job is to sell wine. It’s plain and simple. It’s not even to bring people into the tasting room or to get them to try a few sips of wine. It’s literally to sell them bottles and bottles of wine because we don’t make money on tastings. We make money on bottles. But no one wants to buy something from that sleazy salesperson. We all know the one and just thinking about it makes me annoyed. It’s rare for me to go into explicit detail about how the wine is produced or what flavor notes a person may taste when sampling. I give them a quick rundown and then I just talk. I talk as if we’re old friends, making them comfortable, making sure they’re having a good time. And before they even realize it, they’re walking out the door with several bottles of wine and a smile on their face.

C.Grizwold: I’ve always wanted to learn how to play guitar. I guess when I was growing up I was always shy and quiet. It didn’t really fit with who I was so I never bothered to pursue it. How about you?

Me: I guess I would say snowboarding. I grew up in Massachusetts and while I learned how to snow ski, I never learned to snowboard. Like the badass kind in the mountains. I think my parents thought I would die so they kept me on the bunny hills. And maybe beekeeping too.

C.Grizwold: A reckless one, huh?

Me: I wouldn’t say that. I think I just always felt stifled. It’s how I ended up in Napa. I feel like I can breathe here.

C.Grizwold: I grew up in the area so I don’t have that kind of love for it, but I know what you mean. I love all the land.

Me: Me too.

C.Grizwold: So, do you have another question for us?

Me: I have lots of questions, but I guess my biggest ones will have to wait. I’m totally trying to picture what you look like and asking probably defeats the purpose of the app, right?

C.Grizwold: I’m doing the same, but I guess we ed this app for a reason.

We finish out the night with a few more fun questions, getting to know each other a little better and it’s fun. The time es quickly and before I know it’s almost midnight. I’m not usually one to stay up late, more the early riser. I guess I’ll see how that plays out tomorrow. Hopefully I’m not too tired.

When my alarm goes off at a quarter to six, I remind myself that I had a great time last night, but it still doesn’t help how dead ass tired I feel. I’m not old and most twenty-three-year-olds are probably dragging themselves home from the club about now, but not me. I’m up early to go for a run and then head into work. Lauren and I are meeting early to continue the plans for Apple Jacks. It’s easier to meet when the winery and vineyard are closed to the public. It’s not like I work in the tasting room every single day, and today I’m actually off. I’m sure people would think I was crazy if they knew I enjoyed spending my days off at the vineyard. But I want to be involved in the planning and helping Lauren. I

don’t look at this as work.

When I walk up to the office, Olivia and Oscar are running around outside, giggling and pushing each other. Ellen’s kids are pretty much the funniest kids I’ve ever met and even though I’m only twenty-three, they’ve changed my mind about wanting kids. I used to think it was far too much work. I’d watch parents here at the vineyard and their kids would be screaming and running away from them. That’s the last thing I needed to deal with in my already chaotic life, but then I started to realize parenting is what you put into it. Ellen and Will, and even Lauren and Jack as their aunt and uncle, spend so much time with these kids. They’ve taught them how to have fun, but in return, the kids have taught all of us how to do the same. “Oh man. What are you two doing here this early? Get kicked out of school again?” I ask, clenching my teeth and wrinkling up my nose. My face makes Olivia giggle in the most adorable way. Her laugh is infectious and so damn cute, I can’t help but smile when I’m around her. Jack may have given her the nickname Ollie, but she should be called Giggles. “Who got kicked out of school? I would guess it was you, Penny. You seem like the kind because I heard you say,” Oscar pauses, looking around and then he whispers, “shit.” It takes everything in me not to burst out laughing. This kid has heard more swear words at this vineyard from the grounds crew. Every other word out of their mouth is fuck, but somehow he overlooks it? There’s no way he gets to hold me to a higher standard. “Listen, kid, and you listen too, Olivia. The men who work here swear all the time. How come you don’t think they got kicked out of school?” “I do. You guys are all crazy,” he shoots back, running off laughing. “Boys,” Olivia says, rolling her eyes as she walks off after her brother, but not before throwing her arms around my waist and giving me a little squeeze.

I’m smiling as I watch them make their way over to their mom’s office and when I turn around, Tommy’s watching me. As much as I want to toss a middle finger in his direction, I instead wave at him, calling out, “Good morning.” And oddly enough, he waves back.

Chapter Eight

Tommy

The afternoon sun beats down relentlessly. My t-shirt is soaked, the material clinging to my skin as I hammer the next board into place. As soon as it’s done, I stop, reaching for my bottle of water and taking a long drink. It’s cold and refreshing, especially since I started putting ice cubes in it. Recapping the bottle and throwing it onto the ground, I tug my shirt off, needing to feel the breeze directly against my skin. It relieves some of the heat immediately and I reach down for the next piece of wood as I get back to work. By the time I’m on the last box, the sun is now low in the sky. The guys will have all gone home by now and as I straighten to stretch out my back, I notice a figure standing over by the fence, watching me. “Penny?” I call out. She lowers the camera she’s holding before slowly holding up a hand in a cautious wave. “Hey.” “Were you taking pictures of me?” I ask, glancing around behind me to the empty fields. She walks slowly toward me, camera still in hand and a nervous expression on her face. When she finally reaches me, her cheeks are a little flushed, although I can’t tell if it’s from the heat or because I busted her spying on me. “It’s um…it’s for the competition thing,” she says, biting her bottom lip. “For promotional purposes.” A raise a brow in question. “Promotional purposes?” “Uh huh.” “Even though this has nothing to do with making cider?”

Penny looks around, her cheeks darkening a little before her gaze lands back on me, her eyes focused on my chest. “Um, yeah, it’s um…” she trails off and when I clear my throat, her eyes snap up to my face. “What are you doing here anyway?” she asks, changing the subject. I glance down at the four boxes I’ve built before turning back to her. “Building some beehives.” Penny’s mouth drops open in surprise and I smirk at her. “Yeah, so someone might have suggested it and then went and bought me a book. Figured I’d give it a try.” Her jaw snaps shut; her mouth set in a firm line as she now glares at me. “Someone was being nice, despite someone else’s rudeness.” Her hands are on her hips as she waits for my response. Throwing the hammer on the ground, I run a hand through my sweat-soaked hair. “Yeah, about that,” I start, feeling weirdly nervous. “Sorry I was rude to you.” “Sorry you were a complete ass you mean?” A chuckle falls from my mouth as I turn to fully face her. “Someone’s got their panties in a twist,” I tease. Penny’s brow narrows. “Get your mind off my panties, Thomas Andrews.” “Thomas?” I repeat. “Wow, I am in trouble.” She rolls her eyes at me, glancing down at the four boxes. “Anyway, I believe the correct term is apiary.” This time I burst out laughing, my head falling back as the sound echoes across the fields. “Okay, beekeeping police,” I tease. “I can see this is important to you.” She crosses her arms across her chest which only accentuates and draws my eyes to her tits. Swallowing hard, I have to force myself to look up. “Whatever,” she says dismissively. “In any case, they look…nice,” she adds, almost as an afterthought.

“Nice?” I repeat with a smile. “You can just it they look great, you know?” “And you can just it you were rude and then say thank you for the book,” she bites back, although I can see she’s trying to fight a smile. I step toward her, my gaze locking with hers as I say, “I’m sorry I was rude to you yesterday, Penny and thank you for the book. It was nice of you.” She lets out a satisfied huff as her eyes once again drift down. I watch as they widen, her pupils dilating a little as her mouth forms a tiny O shape. That’s when I realize I’m standing here shirtless, which is not something I’d normally do in front of my colleagues. Reaching down, I grab my t-shirt from the ground and awkwardly pull it on. “So, you wanna help me with this?” I ask, needing to take the focus off the fact she was just looking at me like that. Her gaze snaps up. “Seriously?” I shrug, trying for nonchalance. “Sure, why not.” Penny holds a hand up to shield her eyes from the low sun as she watches me. She doesn’t answer my question at first and the longer we stand here in this awkward silence, the more I think she’s going to say no. That’s probably for the best anyway. I mean what the fuck am I thinking asking her if she wants to help me keep bees? “Okay,” she eventually says.

We spend the next hour or so moving the boxes over to the end of the orchard where the bees tend to cluster. We get them set up properly, just like I’d read about in the book she gave me last night, in between chatting with my online mystery match. We don’t talk much, but it’s not awkward, even when Penny takes a few photos of me and the beehives.

“Okay bees, move in,” Penny shouts with a flourish as we both step back to ire our work. I laugh. “It doesn’t work like that, Pen,” I say, walking over to the old tree stump near the fence line. “How does it work then, smarty pants?” I glance over my shoulder and see her standing, arms once again crossed over her chest as she watches me. “We have to attract them to the hive,” I tell her. “And how do we do that?” “By putting some old wax or a comb from their existing hive in there,” I say, ing the research I’d done last night. “Wait, what?” Penny half shouts as she steps toward me. “You’re gonna pull off some of their current home and stick it in there?” “Yep,” I say with a grin. “Oh my god, you’re so gonna get stung again,” she says, watching me with a smirk on her face. I chuckle, reaching for a piece of the comb that’s on the old tree stump. “Maybe,” I tease. “Or maybe I’m just a super skilled beekeeper and I’ll nail it first try.” Penny rolls her eyes at me as she mutters, “Right.” I grin, before snapping the piece of comb off and walking back to the hives I’ve built. Penny takes a couple of steps backward as a small swarm of bees follow me, their angry sounding buzzing making me a little nervous. Not wanting to show it though, I hold the comb out in front of me, mentally praying that these little fuckers don’t suddenly decide to sting me. I reach the closest hive, opening the lid and practically throwing the comb inside before slamming it shut. Stepping back with a triumphant smile on my face, I turn to Penny with my arms

out in victory as I say, “See, easy,” just as one of the little fuckers lands on the side of my neck and stings me. “Fuck!” I shout, slapping my hand against my skin. The pain radiates out from the bite, even as the now dead bee falls to the ground. How the fuck can something so little be so damn painful? Penny is laughing her ass off now, practically bent over as I stumble toward her. “Not funny,” I grumble, reaching for my water bottle. “Here,” she says, tears of laughter streaming down her cheeks. “Sit down and let me.” She practically shoves me back onto one of the empty hive boxes as she moves to stand beside me. Crouching down a little so she can inspect the bite, I feel the warmth of her breath as it brushes across my skin. It sends a jolt of electricity straight down my spine, goosebumps erupting on my arms. I have to swallow hard when she moves her fingers to my neck. “I think the stinger is still in there,” she says, her voice low. “What?” I practically shout, turning to her. “Keep still,” she says, moving my head back so she can look at my neck. “The stinger, I need to get it out.” I close my eyes as my heart starts to pound out a heavy rhythm inside my chest that has nothing to do with the bee sting and everything to do with how close Penny is to me right now and how much her touch is affecting me. “Hold still,” she whispers, her breath once again caressing my skin in a weirdly intimate way. “I just need…” she trails off as I feel a small pinch. “There, got it.” I open my eyes to see a small black thing on her finger, which she flicks away. Needing some distance between us so I can get my body and my thoughts back under control, I move to stand. “Sit,” she says, hands on my shoulders as she pushes me back down. “What are you doing?” I ask, my voice sounding weird.

She leans across me to grab her water bottle, giving me a bird’s eye view down her shirt at her tits. I have to stifle the groan, closing my eyes once again as all sorts of dark and dirty fantasies now run through my mind. A coolness pressing against my neck has me opening my eyes again and when I do, I find Penny watching me, a half-smile on her face. “What?” I ask, my voice low. “Nothing,” she replies with a smirk. “No, seriously, what?” Penny laughs, all throaty and low and I swear the sound is like a hardline to my dick. “I don’t get to see this side of you very often, that’s all,” she says. “What side of me?” Penny shrugs, removing the ice as she inspects the sting. “The less grumpy side.” “I’m not grumpy,” I reply. “Oh yeah,” she says with a wink as she now drops the ice cube down the back of my shirt. “You sure?” And before I have a chance to respond, she’s jogging away from me, a huge smile on her face that has me laughing even as I shake my head at her.

When I finally get home, I take a long cold shower, partly to cool down after today and partly because I need to stop thinking filthy thoughts about my much younger co-worker. Stepping out, I dry off and pull on some shorts and an old tshirt before grabbing a beer and heading out to my back porch. Opening up the app on my phone, I pull up the messages, knowing my online fantasy girl is the perfect distraction from the off-limits one at work.

Me: hey, how was your day?

It’s weird how easy our conversations are, even if we have no clue what each other looks like or does for a living. It all just feels so natural and after the whole not-into-nude-pics confession we’d both made yesterday, it’s only gotten better.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Hey! My day was…interesting ;) You?

Me: interesting? In what way? Mine was good, got something new started at work.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Interesting in an…interesting way?

I laugh out loud at her explanation, wondering what it is that happened to her to make this day of hers so interesting. And whether it’s a good interesting or a bad interesting.

Me: you up to anything tonight?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: chatting with you? Kinda makes me a bit of a loser, hey?

Me: Guess it makes me a loser too. But nothing wrong with wanting something more, you know?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Yeah, I know. And that’s where I’m at. I’m sick of asshole guys who are only interested in one thing. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.

Me: sorry you’ve had to experience that.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Thanks, but it’s ok…I’m tough and will rise above it #iamwomanhearmeroar!

I laugh out loud at her comment and hashtag, once again wondering who the hell this woman is. Everything about her just feels right, the easy conversation, the banter, the flirting. It makes me wonder what things would be like if we were to ever meet in person. Would it still be this easy and fun?

Me: I’d like to hear you roar…

I send the message without thinking, because even though we both agreed not to send the dick/titty pics that seem to be all the rage these days, it doesn’t mean we’ve stopped flirting with each other. The bubbles pop up on screen and I realize I’m holding my breath as I wait for her response. When it finally comes, I can’t stop the “fuck” that falls from my mouth. Yeah, I definitely want to meet this girl someday.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: I’d like to have you make me roar ;)

Chapter Nine

Penny

The bubbles are floating and I’m waiting on his response, hanging on the possibility of his words and I feel all giddy like a teenager. There is something so totally different about communicating this way and not knowing what this person looks like or them knowing what I look like. It’s freeing and a little reckless, and while I’m generally pretty bold, I haven’t gone the route of cyber sexy times with someone who is essentially a stranger.

C.Grizwold: Right now, I’m regretting not getting that titty pic because I’m sure they’re perfect.

Me: Who says I’m not sending it now?

While I’m totally teasing him and still don’t plan on sending it, this playful banter is pretty fun. I’m smiling from ear to ear and have even giggled a few different times. I have no idea what makes this guy different than the others I’ve met, but there’s something about him that sets him apart. He hasn’t played the hot and cold game. He hasn’t ignored my messages or said anything self-absorbed and that’s pretty much the best start to meeting someone I’ve ever had. I like the way we’ve eased into this flirting, and there’s something freeing about doing it online. It’s almost as if it’s not real, but this connection between us is definitely real.

C.Grizwold: Personally, I’d prefer a description over a picture. There’s so much more that can be said through words.

Something about what he says makes me feel far more confident than I expect. I have no problem describing my body to him and hoping he enjoys it far more than a simple picture. We’re connecting on a different level and I almost want to text Jack and thank him for suggesting the app. I never would’ve ed, thinking this whole thing is for the desperate and lonely and people who are worried about their appearance. But taking away those aspects, it has been easier to open up, not worrying if this person will find me attractive.

Me: I have perky little tits and right now my nipples are so hard just from your words. Just imagine what your mouth would do in person if it can elicit this response from my body without ever touching me.

C.Grizwold: Fuck...just your words have me hard too. I’d love to taste your sweet little tits.

Oh my god, this is really happening and my body is going haywire. All sensation pools between my legs, warm and desperate and making me wiggle in the chair I’m sitting in. I had no idea this could be so hot, hotter than doing this in person because he can’t see the blush that’s creeping up my face.

Me: I’m blushing, but I’m also begging for you. I’d let you suck my tits while I slipped my hand into your pants...

C.Grizwold: Don’t stop there...I can practically feel your hand wrapped around my cock.

Me: I’d stroke you slowly, making you moan and beg me for more. My small hand wrapped around your thick, hard dick.

This is completely out of control and if we don’t stop soon, I’m going to be heading into my bedroom to find my rabbit so it can meet my cat. This is intense and sexy and the biggest fucking turn-on. I don’t want to stop, but I know we can’t go on like this without taking it further. I’d like to save that for a little later and maybe get to know him a little better before we cross the line, not like we aren’t already teetering on the edge.

C.Grizwold: You have me so fucking worked up I’m going to need a cold shower and a shot of whiskey before I can go to bed.

Me: hahaha...I can categorically say the same thing about you. Sorry that I now have you living up to your original name.

C.Grizwold: LOL. Blue Balls for sure right now, but don’t worry, I’ll take care of myself.

Me: And I’ll do the same all while thinking about you.

C.Grizwold: Your perfect little tits and your filthy mouth will be the center of all my fantasies. I’m going to sign off now but have a great night.

Me: You too. Chat tomorrow?

C.Grizwold: Absolutely.

I fall back against the chair, slumping down as my head falls back and a small laugh escapes my lips. This is not how I thought my evening would go down, especially after spending part of my evening getting to know Tommy a little better. It’s all very weird because I’m finding myself drawn to him too. Seeing him shirtless and sweaty, his perfectly defined abs on display and with him not being such a crab, I actually enjoyed working on the bee houses with him. But now here I am obsessing over C.Grizwold and his online persona. I’m torn on what I’m doing here. I shouldn’t be interested in Tommy. We work together and he’s never once expressed interest in me and maybe that’s the problem. I gravitate toward those hard-to-get guys, needing to make them want me. It’s always failed me. And now I have this awesome guy online who is into me and isn’t playing hard to get. No games, no bullshit, just conversation and flirting and legitimate interest and I’m struggling. I guess all it took was for me to be single and announcing I’m swearing off men to find two I’m actually enjoying spending time with. I’m not even certain Tommy is an option. I think it’s probably more about his aloofness and disinterest I’m attracted to. At least with C.Grizwold it feels like we could have a real connection. But when I close my eyes, all I see is Tommy’s well-defined arms, building the bee houses, sweat sliding in rivulets down his flat stomach. I guess I’m the visual one.

I’m up with the sun and smiling. I feel totally different than when I’m shackled in a shitty relationship with an asshole guy. I’m even more excited about heading into work today. After my late-night fantasies died down, I found myself wondering about the bees and how they’re doing. I’m intrigued by how this will all work out, and if it really will. It would be nice to force all the bees away from the orchard and into their own little space. It will

allow for people to walk through the area without worrying about being stung and it will allow us to make our own honey. The honey part came during my bedtime searching as I tried to learn a little more about beekeeping. It was also a good way to get my mind off the super sexy convo I had with C.Grizwold so I could fall asleep a little less worked up. I head right over to where Tommy set everything up yesterday, dragging a small fiberglass pond and pump system behind me. It’s been stored in one of the sheds since I started working here after it was removed from the front entrance. There were a few comical stories about Olivia and Oscar swimming in it and once it even attracted a wayward black bear cub. That was when it was removed and the bear was reunited with its mama. It’s going to make the perfect place for the bees to get a drink. Water is extremely important for keeping the hive cool, especially during the hot summers here in Napa. Plus, it also keeps the bees from having to fly too far to find it. They tend to make their way to the lake and since that’s usually a place where guests like to walk around, this will keep them away and keep them from stinging people. The only trouble with the pond is, I have no idea if I can dig a hole deep enough to fit this damn thing in there. I drop the pond and the pump on the other side of the fence and walk back to one of the sheds where the landscaping and gardening tools are kept. Even though I’m not sure finding a shovel will help me dig the hole I need for this pond, but I’m willing to give it a shot. When the shovel connects with the ground, not a damn thing happens other than force reverberating back up the shaft and rattling through my body. I push the point down toward the ground and this time, with my feet planted on the blade of the shovel, I jump. It literally moves about an inch into the ground making me laugh out loud at how I’m not really as tough as I like to think. I continue with this same method, the ground dry as hell, but I finally start to make some progress. I’m dripping sweat, and my hands are starting to form a few blisters, and I’m almost certain I could give the groundskeeper guys a run for their money in of smelling like B.O. but I’m damn proud of myself. I swipe my hand across my face, pushing the sweat away and trying to keep my

hair back when I catch a glimpse of someone out of the corner of my eye. I look up and find Tommy watching me, a cheeky smile on his face. “What?” I call, dropping the shovel and throwing my hands up. “How long have you been watching me?” “Don’t flatter yourself. I wasn’t watching you. I was watching the hilarity unfold as all one hundred pounds of you tried to dig a hole,” he calls back, as he starts to walk toward me. “I’m not doing that bad. And besides, I was trying to help your bees,” I respond, indignant and bothered already. “I’m just giving you shit, Pen,” he says, smiling at me as he hops the fence. “I’ll grab another shovel and help you.” “I read that bees need a water source to keep the hive cool and if we provide it for them then they won’t have to go far to find one,” I say, responding like I’m some expert now because I spent last night reading a website on beekeeping basics. “I read that too and was thinking of a way we could get something out here to keep them away from the lake. I also ordered us those beekeeping hats and one of those smoke puffing cans.” The way he talks to me, using words like we and us, as if he’s now made this something we’ll always do together, makes me feel excited about the prospect of not only working on this, but getting to spend time together too. “Look at you. You’re like all in.” “You all in too?” I pause for a second, wondering if I’m reading too much into what’s going on between us. Maybe he’s just being friendly since we’ve found something we’re both interested in. Or maybe he’s the kind of person who just isn’t friendly with people he works with and I’ve finally broken him down. Whatever it is, I’m glad he’s cool with being around me now since I actually like being around him too. “You still going to be a grump?” I ask with a hint of playfulness in my tone as I

hit him with a hard stare. “I can’t make any guarantees,” he shoots back, smiling and gives me a wink as he walks away to grab another shovel, but before he gets too far away, he calls out, “You have dirt on your face.” I quickly pull my t-shirt up at the hem and wipe at my face. I’m sure it’s covered in dirt considering what my hands look like. Tommy’s still watching me and he shakes his head. “I think it was better with the dirt on it,” he says with mock disgust in his voice. I roll my eyes and yell, “Don’t be a jerk!” This is all so very weird, weird but fascinating.

Chapter Ten

Tommy

I’d like to say I behave myself outside in the heat helping Penny dig a pond hole for our bees, but I’d totally be lying about that. I mean, sure, on the outside, I’m the perfect gentleman, but on the inside, holy shit, that’s a whole other story. It’s bad enough that her shirt is soaked in sweat and clinging to her body, worse still that it’s now practically see-through, meaning I can tell she’s wearing a black bra, but the way she keeps jamming that shovel into the ground…fuck me. Her tits literally bounce with every jab and when she bends over to lift the dirt, giving me a perfect view of her ass, I have to bite the inside of my cheek just to stop myself from groaning out loud. I’m blaming the damn matchmaker app and the conversation Wine Queen and I had going on last night. Despite having no clue what each other looks like, no clue even what any of our body parts look like, her words and messages to me had me hard as a rock and coming like a teenage boy when I finally logged off and took care of myself. And once again, I find myself wondering who this mystery woman is and what it would be like if we were to meet in real life. And as I get an eyeful of everything Penny has on display, my brain seems to decide it’s going to merge the two people into one person. Which means a whole lot of dirty shit featuring Penny in a starring role is going on inside my head right now. “Tommy?” I look up, shaking my head to try and get my mind out of the gutter and back to the present. “What?” Penny smirks at me and I get the feeling it’s not the first time she’s called out to me. “I was wondering if it’s deep enough?”

If it’s deep enough? Jesus, just those words have all my dirty fantasies moving straight to Penny and me and the two of us plastered against the wall of the shed, her legs wrapped around my waist as I thrust into her and ask her the exact same question. Fuck me, what the hell is going on with me today? I clear my throat. “Ah yeah, think it should be good. Wanna put it in and see?” Oh, fuck me, what am I even saying at this point? Wanna put it in? Right now, I wanna punch myself right in the face. “Sure,” she shrugs, leaning her shovel against the fence post as she bends over and reaches for the pond. She winces as she tries to move it though and when I get a look at her hands I see why. “Fuck, Pen, stop,” I immediately say, walking over to her. She drops the pond and straightens as I take her hands in mine. “These are a mess,” I say quietly, my thumb brushing gently over her palm. “Thanks,” she replies with a huff. I look up and find her watching me, her gaze unreadable. Turning back to her hands, I slide my fingers up to her wrists. “We should have gotten you some gloves.” She shrugs. “Couldn’t find any.” I shake my head, dropping one of her hands as my other remains curled around her wrist. “Come with me,” I say, gently pulling her toward the cider house. “Tommy, wait,” she says, trying to tug her arm from my grip. I don’t let go, just glance back at her. “It’s too late for gloves now,” she says. “We’re not getting gloves,” I reply, as we head toward the tasting room. Inside, the place is surprisingly empty, and I make my way past the bar and back toward Jack’s office, calling out his name. “Jack?” But we are met with silence and when I reach the office he’s set up and see the

door is open and the room empty, I’m grateful we haven’t interrupted anything. God knows he and Lauren like to get up to enough kinky shit around the place. I definitely don’t need to see that. I pull Penny inside and toward one of the chairs facing Jack’s desk. “Sit,” I tell her, letting go of her wrist as I grab the first aid kit from inside the cupboard next to the filing cabinet. I turn back to her, grabbing the other chair as I pull it close and sit down, my legs on either side of hers. “Tommy, it’s fine,” she says, as I reach for her hands, laying them across my thigh. “I can take care of it.” I flatten my palm across her wrists as I look up at her. “Anyone ever tell you you’re stubborn?” Penny fights a smile, biting her bottom lip as she feigns a smirk and says, “Oh hello pot, I’m kettle, nice to meet you.” A chuckle falls from my mouth as I turn back to her hands. “Just sit still and behave yourself.” She shuffles in her chair, moving a little closer as she gets comfortable. “And if I don’t?” I lift my gaze, looking at her from beneath my lashes as the corner of my mouth lifts in an evil smile. “Try it and find out,” I dare. Her cheeks flush a little, but she doesn’t look away, a daring glint in her eyes as she watches me, almost as though she’s actually considering it. The room falls silent as the two of us sit here, locked in a strange kind of stand-off that feels laden with tension that definitely feels of the sexual kind. At least on my end. I realize how close we are, how easy it would be for me to lean forward and kiss her, taste those lips that seem to have been a regular feature in my nighttime fantasies ever since I started talking to Wine Queen. I’m still not sure why my brain keeps merging these two people and I’m certain I’m not ready to try and process the whys of it either. Eventually I look away, letting out a hard exhale as I remind myself that Penny is off-limits, no matter how hot she is or how much she intrigues me, especially

lately. It’s not like Penny and I have ever had a bad relationship, we’ve just never really had any relationship, at least one that isn’t of the strictly work variety. We’re co-workers, nothing more. And even if I were willing to look past that little fact, there’s still the issue of how she’s ten years younger than me. Why the fuck would she even be interested in an old guy like me, especially with the likes of Dylan and the other guys roaming around the place? Someone like Penny does not become interested in someone like me and she sure as shit doesn’t think about hooking up with someone like me. I reach for the antiseptic and some cotton balls. “This is going to sting,” I murmur as I gently start to dab at the blisters and raw skin on Penny’s fingers. She winces, her hand flinching a little as it rubs along my jeans. I force myself to ignore the way my body reacts to that tiny movement, to the proximity of her hand to my dick or her breasts to my mouth. My heart pounds inside my chest and in the silence of the room, it sounds deafening. “You need to keep these clean and covered,” I say as I start to unwrap some band-aids and wrap them around the worst ones. “Okay,” she breathes out and I feel her warm breath feather across my skin. When I’m done, I let go of her hands, but she doesn’t move them from my thigh. Looking up, I find her watching me again, that same unreadable expression on her face. Her mouth is slightly open and when my eyes dip, I can see the hard beat of her pulse at the side of her neck. I’m overcome with a sudden urge to press my mouth against it, to suck and taste her skin, to feel that beat against my lips. Blinking, I look back up and find her dark eyes still watching me. Up close I can see she has incredibly long dark lashes that frame the most amazingly deep blue eyes. They’re the kind of eyes you could get lost in and the longer I look into them, the more I feel myself giving in, my resolve wavering as my body moves slightly closer to her. “Jack?”

Lauren’s loud voice cuts through the silence, ending whatever this is as Penny and I both spring apart like we’ve been jabbed with a hot poker. “Jack, are you here?” Her voice is closer now and needing to not have her walk in here and overthink whatever it is she thinks she sees, I stand, moving the chair back toward the desk as I call out, “Only us, Lauren.” Her head pops in the open office door, a smile on her face as she takes in me and then Penny, who is still sitting on the chair where I left her, her bandaged hands now resting on her thighs. “Oh shit, what happened?” Lauren asks, her smile falling. “Nothing bad,” I say, waving a hand at Penny. “Pen just got some blisters and I was cleaning them up for her.” “Blisters? From what?” Lauren asks, confused. “We’re um…we were digging a pond for the bees,” I say, practically groaning out loud at how ridiculous that sounds. Lauren’s smile reappears and I can tell she’s trying really hard not to laugh. “I see,” she says. “And why would you be doing that?” I roll my eyes before closing them and taking a long inhale, knowing I’m going to cop an endless amount of shit for what I’m about to say. “Penny and I are keeping bees,” I say, pinching the bridge of my nose. “It gets them away from the orchard and we might even get some honey out of it. Bees need water, so rather than them flying all the way to the lake, we built them a pond.” Lauren isn’t even bothering to stop her laughter now as she turns to Penny. “Is that so?” Penny nods. “Yeah.” Lauren’s eyes move back to me, a cheesy ass grin on her face as she gives me a once over. “Well,” she says, a hand on the doorframe. “I think it’s a great idea and hey maybe we can do something fun with the honey too.” She raps once on

the frame before disappearing. Just when I think the coast is clear, her head reappears, that same cheesy smile on her face as she looks first at Penny and then back at me. “Also, that’s really sweet of you, Tommy, taking care of Penny’s hands like that. Anyone would think you…I don’t know, liked her,” she says, waving a hand between us before disappearing again, the sound of her laughter floating back to us as she walks away. Fuck me. The room falls silent again and when I finally turn to Penny, she’s still sitting in the chair, her eyes on her bandaged hands, her body stiff. I feel like I should say something, but I have no idea what the fuck I’m supposed to say in a situation like this. Before I get a chance though, she stands, walking toward me without meeting my gaze. “Thank you,” she says, coming to a stop beside me. “For…” she holds up her hands, not bothering to elaborate. “Pen,” I say softly, but she moves away, walking out of the office without looking back and leaving me to wonder what the fuck that just was.

When I finally get home, I’m feeling weirdly frustrated. After the incident in the office, Penny had disappeared. I went back out to finish the pond, getting the fiberglass shell into the ground and setting up the pump before filling it with water, but she hadn’t come to check it out. In the end I’d done something so completely out of character, even I couldn’t figure out where it had come from. I’d snapped a picture of the newly installed and working pond and texted it to Penny. I never texted Penny. Ever. Sure, I had her number, but everyone at Somerville’s and now Apple Jacks had

each other’s number. Purely for work and emergency purposes of course. Which meant I had never needed to her for anything. And I still wasn’t sure why I’d sent the text today. In the end though, she never texted back, so I guess I could chalk up whatever that was between us in Jack’s office as being completely one-sided. It was probably a good thing and I just needed to get my head in the game and my mind off Penny and back on this mystery woman I’m chatting with online. After I do the usual of taking a shower and grabbing a beer, I settle on the back porch to pick back up on our conversation from last night.

Me: so…sleep well?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: I did actually…you?

Me: I did yeah…after I took care of things anyway.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: ditto, no chance I could sleep that riled up. How was your day?

I let out a hard exhale, wishing to fuck I could talk to someone about my day and whatever it was that happened with Penny. There’s no way I can talk to Jack and after today’s little episode, Lauren is definitely a hard no, too. It’s not like I want to bring it up with any of the other guys either, especially considering it’s about one of our co-workers. But I also know it’s not a topic of conversation I can have with Wine Queen either, especially when I’m finding myself more and more drawn to her.

Me: forget about my day, let’s talk about how riled up you were last night?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Lol…you up for another round, huh?

Me: always ;) I am a guy, ?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: grateful to have that confirmed! But for the record it isn’t just guys who think and fantasize about sex, you know?

My dick immediately twitches, hardening a little so I have to readjust myself.

Me: oh yeah…tell me one of your dirty little fantasies then?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: and if I do?

Me: maybe I’ll get a chance to make it come true one day…

Even as I type the words, I know it’s a scenario I’m actually hoping for. As fun as this is to flirt and chat, not bothering to worry about the little shit like what we look like or what we do for a living, I know it’s not even close to being the same as the real-life event. As strained and as broken as Caitlyn and I became, I enjoyed being in a

relationship. I miss the warmth of another body beside mine in bed, the brush of fingers in the night and the appeal of waking up hungry and wanting, and being able to do something about it. But a part of me is scared. Scared that what I wish for and what Wine Queen might want are two totally different things. Scared that if and when we do meet in real life, it won’t be the same. That part of the reason we can be so free and honest with each other is because we have the safety of not knowing who each other is. My phone pings out with a new message and when I look down at the words that fill my screen, my mouth goes dry. Taking a swig of my cold beer, I settle back into my chair and read her words, my mind once again trying to picture doing all of these things to her, even as my brain insists on putting Penny’s face on this mystery woman I feel so drawn to.

Chapter Eleven

Penny

It’s been three weeks since Tommy sent me the text message with the picture of the finished pond we put together for the bees and it’s now become a regular thing. We are constantly texting each other updates about our bees. They’re like our babies and we get way too excited about what they’re up to. Our hive has taken off and the number of bees in the orchard fields has decreased a ton. It didn’t happen immediately, and we began to worry our hive wouldn’t be viable. We jumped in feet first and didn’t really research as much as we should have, later finding out it can be difficult to move an already established hive. But we persevered; using lemongrass oil to entice them to set up residence in the awesome little houses Tommy had built. We are by no means experts or would we even go around sharing advice, but I’d call us functioning bee parents. We even had to build a few more little houses as our bees started to swarm, which is not a good thing. It meant they were crowded and would bail, using us for a place to stay and then flying the coop. We couldn’t have that happen, so we expanded their compound and now they live in what we like to call Melrose Hive. Tommy didn’t get the name and I had to fill him in on the old show from the nineties that I binged on Hulu, and even though he won’t it it, I’m certain he started watching Melrose Place because he named some of the bees after characters. “How are they doing?” I ask, walking up to find Tommy already checking on them. He’s decked out in his beekeeping hat and is puffing away at them. He looks completely ridiculous and I’m not sure it’s something I’ll ever get used to. I start laughing and I can’t control it, belly laughs as I look at Tommy in that stupid hat. He looks like a cross between Smokey Bear and a sexy lumberjack, but it’s the shape of the hat and the netting covering his face that just looks so silly.

“What are you laughing at?” he asks incredulously, stopping what he’s doing to look over at me. “You look so stupid in that hat. I don’t know why I can’t get used to seeing you in it,” I it through deep breaths as I try to control my laughing. “Seriously? What do you think you look like in it? The men certainly aren’t running to take you out on a date.” “Same with you. The ladies aren’t falling at your feet,” I shoot back. “Nope, only laughing at me.” He smiles behind the netting and I notice for the first time how strikingly handsome he is, especially when he smiles. His eyes crinkle up in the corners showing his age a little but making him look rugged with his suntanned face and the single dimple that appears when his smile grows wider. I stand watching his face, studying him for a few seconds, feeling a shift in our relationship. There’s a comfort here that never existed before and it’s obvious it’s felt by both of us as we fall silent, letting the moment linger between us. He pulls off his hat, smiling at me again, but this time it’s a smirk of cockiness that I’ve come to know pretty well. This is the smile he’s been giving me since we met. It’s for when he thinks he’s right or he’s about to put me in my place. It’s always been mixed with his grumpy personality, but today there’s something different about it, something playful and fun. “Fine then. I won’t wear it,” he says with confidence, tossing it to the side as he lifts the top off the apiary, a few bees flying out. “They’re going to sting you, you stubborn ass and I’m going to be the one helping you. Just put it back on. I’ll stop laughing.” He just shakes his head, closing his eyes with an over confidence that’s about to get him in trouble. One of our bees, lands right on his forehead and stings him without a second thought. He swats it away and quickly grabs his hat from where he tossed it, scrambling to get it back on before they get any angrier.

“They’re really quite ungrateful, aren’t they?” I tease, smirking at him. “You okay?” “Yeah, I’m fine, but you’re right. These little shits don’t know how good they have it.” He pulls the top up again, setting it off to the side, he lifts the inner cover exposing the medium super. This is where the honey will be produced by our little bees. “Come here,” he says, calling me over with a tilt of his head and I slip my hat on, meeting him on the other side of the apiary. “Look.” His eyes now leave my face and focus on what’s in front of us. “Oh my god. They’re making honey!” I whisper-shout, filled with an intense sense of pride and excitement. My cheeks begin to burn from smiling and when I look up at Tommy, he’s doing the same thing. “It’ll be a few more weeks before we can harvest anything, but how fucking cool is it? We did this.” “Super fucking cool,” I respond back. “And did you know the other apiary has a queen now?” “Wow. Who would’ve thought it would be this easy or this fucking cool?” “I’m not sure it’s always this easy. From what I’ve been reading, we have the right climate and we had an already established colony with all the apple trees. I’m not saying we don’t like totally kick ass, I’m just saying we need to slow our roll and not brag too much.” I wink at him and that smile is back, but this time it makes my heart flutter, my breath catching in my throat. I swallow hard and look away for a few seconds, pulling myself back together. All we have in common are these bees and I shouldn’t read too much into his excitement. It isn’t over getting to spend time with me, but rather what we’ve accomplished together. While I’ve always loved my job, this added bonus has made coming to work even more fun. I don’t have a lot of friends here and oddly enough, I now consider Tommy one of them. When you work for a small business and you didn’t grow up in the area,

it’s hard to make friends as an adult. It’s not that I’m lonely or that I don’t enjoy Lauren and Ellen’s company, but they have Jack and Will, and sometimes I think they think I’m too young to want to hang out with them. Like I’m out clubbing all night or letting guys do shots off my belly in a bar. This beekeeping with Tommy has created a hobby for both us and if I’m being honest, I feel happier because of it. “I was reading that as the summer goes on, we need to make sure we keep wasps and hornets away because they’ll eat our bees,” Tommy says, quietly. We’ve learned to quell our excitement and keep our voices down around the bees. It turns out, they startle easily and then they sting Tommy. Never me. “What? Those fuckers. That’s like cannibalism and really gross. No one’s eating our babies,” I assert and Tommy laughs. “You’re pretty fucking invested in this, huh?” “Um, like you’re not? Did you name the new queen yet?” I ask, hands on my hips, head cocked to the side. “I don’t name them,” he replies derisively as he shakes his head. “Jane Mancini?” I prompt. “I’m pretty sure that’s the name of the queen in apiary number one.” “It’s unit one of the Melrose Hive,” he announces with confidence. “Get it right.” He rolls his eyes in a playfully mocking way that makes me love this flirty banter we have going on. “I can’t even with you right now.” I start to walk away, tos a dismissive hand, but it’s hard not to laugh at how invested both of us are, not only in the beekeeping but also in this friendship. “Later, Pen,” he calls out. “See you, Tom.”

The day goes by quickly, the tasting room is packed with people, but it keeps me busy. Around three o’clock Oscar and Olivia slip in, letting Ellen finish up some bookkeeping. They make the day go by even faster, entertaining the guests with their silliness and truly spot-on comedic timing. It’s unreal to me to think two nine-year-olds could be this funny. Olivia sidles up next to me at the bar top just as I’m pouring a few tasting portions, leaning over and giving the bottle a sniff after I put it down. “I think I should bring my teacher a bottle of this,” she says casually as she hops up on a stool next to me, crossing her leg over the other and leaning her elbow on the bar. She examines the label, eyeing it with reverence and looks as though she’s contemplating something big. “Why would you bring your teacher a bottle of wine?” I ask, genuinely curious about her answer. “You’re nine. That’s not exactly the type of gift you’d bring a teacher.” She lets out a hard sigh of annoyance, flipping one of her blonde braids over her shoulder. “Well, if you must know, today was a hard day. Johnny Stuber wouldn’t stop shouting out answers and it got so annoying that Mrs. Thompson had to stop what she was doing so she could take some pills she keeps in her desk.” She lets out that sigh again, shaking her head with a bit of a pursed lip. “And sometimes when we come back from lunch,” Olivia pauses, looking up at me and keeping her voice low, she says, “she looks like she’s been crying. Kinda seems like she needs this bottle of wine, right?” “Certainly sounds that way,” I chide in agreement, but tell her to check with her mom first. No way I’m handing a bottle of wine to a nine-year-old even if she is growing up on a vineyard.

I arrive home around seven, after finishing up my shift, I checked on the bees and went for a run. I grabbed dinner from a sandwich place down the street and I’m now parked in front of the TV, my phone resting on the arm of the couch and a glass of what I now like to refer to as “the tired teacher” wine on the table beside me. I look over at my phone, wanting to message C.Grizwold, but holding out just a

little longer, because even though we chat every day, I don’t want to seem desperate. We’re nearing the one-month mark and it always feels like that’s when my relationships go to shit. It’s when the true colors start to show and I learn what a douche bag the guy is. It’s usually when the cheaters start to cheat or the assholes start to bring out the snide remarks or when the thieves start to steal. Yep, took my iPad and weirdly a pair of used Louboutin’s I got on Poshmark. I feel like I’ve come a long way since then. Still technically single and holding firm to a part of the pact I made with myself about not moving in with someone after a hot second. But I grab for my phone, still riding my high from the great day I had, I message him.

Me: Hey! How was your day?

It only takes about two minutes before he’s answering me and I’m once again smiling from ear to ear. I’ve never been the best judge of character, but it feels like this app is helping with that. It helped me choose someone who isn’t just here because I’m cute and tiny and have a great ass. It feels like there will never come a time when I put C.Grizwold into the asshole category.

C.Grizwold: It was really good. How was your day?

Me: Mine too.

I stop there, suddenly overcome with a mix of guilt and sadness, and I begin to chew at my lip. I want to tell him about my day and all about the bees, but that isn’t what we’ve been doing. We don’t share our excitement about our days and

all the little details of what made it so great. We gloss over that stuff and slide right into those deeper, obscure questions, and while it’s been fun and far from the norm, I’m missing that basic connection, the simplicity of sharing my day with someone. But how can I tell him about my day when it involves another guy? How can I fill him in without it sounding like I spend all my time with Tommy? When in reality, I really do spend more time with him than anyone else at work now. Something about it feels awkward and the word “jealousy” lurks in the back of my mind. But not just that, I’m struggling to reconcile my feelings, my feelings for both of them. My phone vibrates, pulling me from my thoughts, expecting to see a message from C.Grizwold, but what I get instead is a text from Tommy.

Tommy: Check this out. You really need to get down here and get some pics of the cider house tasting room at night.

Attached is a picture of the cider house tasting room all lit up and practically glowing within the dark night’s sky. It looks stunning with its vaulted ceiling and numerous oversized windows along with the massive chandelier as its centerpiece in the front window.

Me: How about tomorrow? You want to meet me there?

Chapter Twelve

Tommy

“How are the bees going?” I look down from the ladder I’m standing on. “The bees aren’t going anywhere.” Jack smirks at me. “You know what I mean. How are they coming along?” I stick the dead bulb into the back pocket of my jeans. “Hand me that bulb, will you?” I ask, pointing to the box on the bar. Jack walks over and grabs it before holding it up to me, an expectant look on his face. “The bees are fine,” I say exhaling as I take the bulb from him. Once it’s screwed in, I climb down the ladder and walk over to the wall. Flicking the switch, I watch as the impressive chandelier Jack had installed in the tasting room lights up, all of the bulbs now working. “I think it’s cool what you guys are doing,” Jack says, moving over and packing up the ladder for me. “Yeah?” I ask. “Uh huh,” he says with a nod. “Lu mentioned about selling the honey or doing something else with it.” “Pen actually had this idea about making mead.” The words are out before I can even stop them and I cringe as Jack glances back at me, a huge grin on his face. “Oh, Pen did, did she?” he teases. I roll my eyes at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Jack chuckles, as he carries the ladder back to the storeroom. “Oh nothing.” “Bullshit,” I call out as I wait for him to return, knowing this is definitely not nothing. Nor the end of this conversation.

He lets out another laugh as he moves behind the bar to grab two glasses. Holding one up to me in a silent question, he waits for my nod before filling the glass with a cloudy apple cider he recently made and had hooked up to the taps. I wait until he hands me the glass, watching as he fills one for himself. “Jack?” I prompt when he still hasn’t said anything. He grins as he moves around to the same side of the bar I’m standing on, pulling out a stool and taking a seat, indicating for me to do the same. I reluctantly do, knowing that whatever he’s about to say right now, I’m probably not gonna like it. “Just spit it out, Jack.” “What?” he asks, hands up in mock surrender as he lets out a laugh. “You obviously have something you want to say, so just say it.” Jack takes a sip of his cider, smacking his lips together. “Damn, that’s good.” I also take a sip, nodding in acknowledgement. “Might be my favorite, actually.” “Why don’t you ask her out?” he suddenly blurts out and I practically spit my mouthful of cider across the bar. “What?” I ask between coughs as Jack whacks me on the back. “Ask Penny out.” “I can’t do that,” I say shaking my head. “Why not?” he asks, genuinely confused. “You obviously fancy her.” I shake my head at his assumption and even weirder Aussie lingo. “You don’t?” I take another sip of cider, swallowing before I let out a hard breath. “It doesn’t really matter if I do or I don’t. And I’m not saying I do like her,” I lie. “But we work together so it’s not gonna happen.”

Jack bursts out laughing. “That’s the dumbest excuse ever,” he says. “I mean hello, I’m married to the owner.” He shrugs his shoulders as if to say what’s the big deal. “That’s different.” “Um, how?” he says, his question laced with sarcasm. I take another mouthful of cider as I try to figure out how I want to answer Jack’s question. Or how much I’m willing to even it to him. No one knows about my crush on Penny, let alone all the dirty little fantasies that have been invading my thoughts lately. Not just because they are never, ever going to happen, but because I’m also a pretty private person. I don’t go around discussing my personal life, but especially not with people I work with. “Come on, Tommy,” Jack says, his voice serious now. “We’re friends, talk to me.” “Are we?” I ask, surprised. “You don’t think so?” Jack responds, and if I didn’t know better, I’d swear he was almost insulted. “Yeah, we are,” I say with a nod. “I don’t know, I guess, we’re also work colleagues. Actually, scratch that, you’re my boss, we don’t do…” I trail off, waving a hand between us. “This.” Jack lets out a loud laugh, reaching over to slap a hand on my back again. “Tommy, please,” he says, chuckling. “I think we both know, I’m not your boss. And yeah, you might work here, but you’re like family to Lu and Ellen, which means you’re family to me too. So forget about the work bullshit and talk to me, seriously.” I don’t speak right away, sipping on my cider as I try to decide exactly how to answer Jack’s question or what my real reasons are for ignoring my attraction to Penny. “I do like her,” I eventually it with a shrug. “But it’s not as simple as what you and Lu have, okay? Your relationship is…it’s different and regardless of what you’re saying, we do work together, and I don’t want to fuck around with

that.” “Uh huh,” Jack says, moving to refill our glasses. “And if work wasn’t an issue, would that fix things?” I give him a look as if to say how in the hell can work not be an issue, before blurting out, “No, she’s also too young.” Jack scoffs as he rolls his eyes and slides the glass toward me. “Too young, jesus, age is just a number. Who gives a shit?” I open my mouth to tell him that there’s not a chance in hell a twenty-three-yearold is interested in someone my age, but I don’t get a chance as the door opens behind me. From the look on Jack’s face, I know exactly who it is and as I glance back, I feel my heart thud in my chest as Penny walks in. “Speak of the devil,” Jack whispers with a wink. “I’ll leave you to it,” before picking up his cider, throwing a quick wave in Penny’s direction and disappearing out the door she just came through. “Hey,” she says, walking up to the bar and taking a seat. “Hi,” I reply, glancing sideways. Penny smiles at me before looking at my glass. “Is that the new cloudy apple?” I nod, about to offer her one when she reaches over and grabs my glass, lifting it to her mouth for a taste. My eyes drift to her mouth as she lowers the glass and licks her lips, lower still to her throat as she swallows. But it’s not until she lets out a low groan of approval does my mouth go dry, my body filled with sudden lust and want for this woman. Fucking Jack for putting these ideas in my head. “God, that’s good,” she says, sliding the glass back to me. God, that’s good. And now all I can think of is a million other ways I’d love to hear her say that,

but I force my brain to push those dirty thoughts aside as I turn and wave an arm around the room. “It looks amazing all lit up like this, but I think you can get some great shots from outside too.” “Okay, sounds good. The sun’s about to set. You wanna go out and watch it and then I’ll take some photos?” “Sure.” I lift my glass and finish off the rest of the cider, more for courage than anything else. I don’t know what the hell is going on with me anymore, but the more time I spend with Penny, the more my head’s a mess. The problem is, I don’t want to not spend time with her. I like hanging out with her and I like this thing we have going with the bees too. And even though I know I’ve also got this thing going online with Wine Queen and there is a part of me that kind of feels like I can’t have dirty thoughts about both women, I still can’t find a way to choose between the two of them. I think a part of me knows, the Penny thing is never going to happen, so what’s the harm in hanging out with her at work and flirting with Wine Queen at night? It’s not like the two of them even know about each other, nor will they ever meet. We head out to the patio area Jack has set up, the night still warm enough that we don’t need the heat of the fire pit. This side of the tasting room faces west, the whole building perched on the side of a small hill that looks over Somerville’s and offers amazing views of the sunset. “Wow, this is beautiful,” Penny says as she holds up her camera and snaps a couple of shots. I take a seat in one of the deck chairs, not saying anything as I watch her move around and snap the sunset from different positions. Just as the sun is dipping below the horizon, she turns, quickly taking a picture of me sitting in the chair. “What was that for?” I ask. Penny smiles, coming to sit in the chair beside mine. “Posterity.”

I let out a low chuckle. “Posterity, jesus, you make me sound old.” “What?” she asks, glancing over, a smile on her face. “You’ve been here forever, Tommy. It’s important to acknowledge that.” “Forever,” I mutter, once again reminded of just how much older I am. “You think you’ll stick around for much longer?” Penny’s gaze snaps to mine. “Why? You trying to get rid of me?” “No,” I say a little too quickly. “I just…I dunno, I guess I just assumed you’d get bored of this place after a while. It’s a little quiet for someone your age, isn’t it?” Penny narrows her brows, her eyes never leaving mine. “I’m not bored,” she says, her words firm. “I love it here, always have.” “Yeah but—” “Not everyone is interested in partying or the big city or whatever,” she says, cutting me off. “And yeah, sure I’d like to travel and stuff, but I consider this place my home.” She turns away now, her gaze moving back to the darkened horizon. I take advantage of the darkness to keep my eyes on her, watching as she watches the night sky, wondering if she really means that. “Okay,” she suddenly says, standing. “Let’s take a look at this place at night.” I push up from my chair. “Come back here,” I say, my hand on her elbow, her skin warm beneath my touch. “You need to get some distance so you can see it all.” I guide her to the end of the patio and beyond, until we are out of the lit area and plunged into the darkness. I tighten my hand on her arm in case she trips as we both slowly make our way out onto the grassed area. “Okay, here is good,” I say, dropping my hand. “Turn around.” I watch as she slowly turns, my eyes on her as she now faces the tasting room. Even though it’s dark, I still see her eyes widen, her mouth falls open a little as

she takes in the rustic building and full length windows, all lit up on the inside from the tiny lights of the huge chandelier hanging from the ceiling. “Holy shit,” she breathes out. “It’s beautiful.” And as I stand beside her, my eyes still locked on her, I can’t help but think yeah, she really fucking is. I don’t move, just watch as she quietly takes some pictures, seemingly mesmerized by the sight in front of her. Over the past few weeks, things have definitely changed between the two of us as we’ve spent more and more time together, looking after our bees and chatting about them. The damn girl even got me hooked on some cheesy ass nineties drama after she explained to me why we were calling it the Melrose Hive. And as much as I know the chances of anything happening between us are basically zero, fuck all actually, I can’t deny how much I look forward to hanging out with her or how I am constantly trying to find reasons to text her. Sometimes I even find myself texting her when I probably should be messaging Wine Queen. The safer option. “Tommy?” I blink, my eyes focusing on Penny who’s standing staring at me. “Yeah?” “You ready to go?” she asks, jerking a thumb behind her. “Ah sure, yeah…um, let me just lock up here.” Penny nods as we head inside to turn off the lights and lock the place up. I have no idea where Jack has gone, but I’m sure his little disappearing act was a not so subtle attempt to give Pen and me some privacy. “How’d you get up here?” I ask, as we walk outside and toward my truck. Penny shrugs. “I walked.” She moves away from me, holding a hand up in a wave. “Night, Tommy. I’ll see you tomorrow.” “Wait, Pen, you can’t walk back in the dark.” I hear her footsteps get closer, see the smile on her face as she steps into the

small pool of light cast by the security lights outside. “You worried about me, Tommy?” she teases. I smirk at her, leaning my elbow on the roof of the car. “You okay with wandering around with bears and cougars and shit?” Penny swallows, her smile faltering briefly and making me laugh. “Get in, Pen, I’ll drive you back.” She walks over, opening the enger door and climbing in. I do the same, but the second our doors are shut and we’re enclosed in the small, dark space of my truck, I’m surrounded by nothing but her. Her scent, which is a mix between citrus and something sweet. The warmth of her body as she sits next to me and the knowledge that we are alone up here, in the dark. “Thanks,” she says, the click of her seat belt bringing me back to the present. “No problem,” I mumble, hitting the ignition. Almost immediately, Creedence Clearwater Revival blasts from the stereo and I fumble to turn it down. Penny’s laughter fills the car when I do. “I love these guys,” she says, reaching to turn it back up a little. “You know them?” I ask, glancing across at her. She rolls her eyes at me. “Yes, I know them,” she says. “My dad loved them. I grew up listening to them,” she replies as she quietly starts to sing along. I exhale, my eyes closing briefly as I reverse out of the parking space and head down the long driveway back to Somerville’s, wishing Penny could just be five years older or something. Anything to make all this shit I’m suddenly thinking about her okay.

Chapter Thirteen

Penny

I’m sitting at a round table in the barn where our larger weddings are held with papers and pictures scattered all around. The table is cluttered with what looks like a total disaster, but in reality, everything is coming along smoothly. Lauren, Ellen and I are working on the final plans for the grand opening celebration for Apple Jacks and putting together the invitation list and finalizing the arrangements for the tasting giveaway we have planned. “I have the food trucks scheduled for eight o’clock with the tasting room opening at seven. This should give people time to get some drinks, walk around and then grab some food,” Lauren says, checking a few things off our list. “How are things coming with reviewers?” She looks at Ellen who is manically typing on her laptop. “Good, good,” Ellen responds. “I’m just finalizing something big,” she says with wide eyes and a hopeful smile. “Care to share?” Lauren prompts, leaning over to try to get a look at the screen on her computer, but Ellen slams it shut. “Take it down a notch, Nosy Rosy. You’re as bad as the kids. What if I were talking dirty to Will via email and you saw it instead?” “Is that what you were doing? Oh my god, Ellen, we’re in the middle of a meeting! If you were having online sexy times with Will, I’ll puke right here,” Lauren jokes, making a gagging noise as she leans over the side of her chair. I feel my cheeks warm up, flushing a little pink, I’m sure, as I think about the conversations I’ve been having with C. Grizwold at night. They’re nothing short of steamy and I would be totally fucking mortified if anyone ever saw them. “No, Lauren, I wasn’t having sex online with Will.” She rolls her eyes, shaking her head as she opens her computer back up and slides it across the table to Lauren.

She moves it so it’s in front of both of us as Ellen sits across from us with a smug grin on her face, far too pleased with what she’s accomplished. “Oh my god,” Lauren says quietly and then repeats it again louder this time, jumping out of her chair. “Did you tell Jack? How did you...” she trails off, sitting down again and re-reading the email that’s in front of us. “I reached out to all our local s. The usual ones we rely on for publicity and reviews and whatever, but then I thought, what’s the harm in emailing a few bigger names. I figured I’d never hear back, but then yesterday I got an email.” She shrugs, but I can tell she’s so fucking proud of herself. “So, who is this guy?” I ask, not fully familiar with all the bloggers and reviewers like Lauren and Ellen are. “He’s one of the biggest names in the cider reviewing community and somehow, who the hell knows how, but Ellen was able to get him to commit to coming out here for our opening. He has a massive following on Instagram and pretty much everything he touches turns to gold.” “Not that we need it,” Ellen inserts, smirking at us. “The winery is a name on its own and would probably draw a crowd based on that, but I know Jack would like to make a name for himself, too.” While Jack has always been a wine maker this is a new venture for him. His name doesn’t hold the weight like it did in Australia. He’s virtually unknown here and breaking into the cider making business has been a dream of his for a while. The cider tastes great and he’s done a damn good job of combining the look of the Somerville property with Apple Jacks. Somerville’s has always had more of a feminine vibe to it and Apple Jacks is now its masculine counterpart. Somerville’s has been owned and run by women for decades and Lauren and Ellen are continuing that tradition. Someday, Olivia, Ellen’s daughter will take over and if Jack and Lauren decide to have kids, maybe one day their daughter will the ranks. I love the idea of the family business and the way everyone here works together to be successful. Not one job is more important than the next and they’ve never put themselves in a different category as their employees. They aren’t just the owners, they’re employees too. It’s why I love working here and why I’ll always

be grateful to them for taking a chance on me. They deserve this exposure more than anyone. “I’m so happy for you guys,” I tell them, smiling and wondering why Lauren hasn’t run off to share the news with Jack yet. “So, this guy will be here for the soft opening and then what?” “Well, he usually posts pictures and his review on his social media pages and does a full write up on his blog. And I guess if he loves it all, then we hope it translates to visitors and customers and sales.” Lauren shrugs her shoulders, seeming a little more worried than she was just a few minutes ago. “That’s exactly what will happen,” Ellen reaffirms with far more confidence than Lauren. “He will love it. It’s absolute perfection. The cider is delicious and the place looks so damn good, there’s no way he won’t.” She’s now looking at her sister, who looks like she might cry. I watch Lauren swallow hard and shake her head, the tears now welling in her eyes. “We’ve kept this vineyard and winery running for the last ten years or whatever, but it’s always had its own name. We didn’t create this. It isn’t ours, but this is. Jack and I built this with all of your help. It isn’t our parents or our grandparents, it’s ours.” “I don’t think you need to be thanking me. I just sent a few emails,” Ellen responds, humbly. “You kept us on budget. You ran the books and the money end of all of this. Everyone here had a hand in making this work,” Lauren insists, turning to me now and smiling, gratefully. “I want you to help run the opening. I want you there helping with serving and talking with people. You’re the best we’ve ever had, Penny.” “Geez, Lu, you’re going to make all of us cry,” I tell her, choking back the tears. “Of course, I’ll be there. Whatever you need.” “Now why don’t you go find Jack and tell him,” Ellen says, shooing her along. Lauren jumps up from her chair, practically running out of the barn, but she turns around and scampers back to us.

“Penny, I want you to start the promotion in the tasting room. Start running the samples and the entries today. All the materials are in my office if I don’t see you later. Just grab them off my desk.” She’s talking so fast and her excitement is contagious. The smile on her face is so wide it has her eyes wrinkling up at the corners. She’s walking away again but falls short of leaving once more. “Oh, and thank you. Thank you to both of you. This opening is going to be amazing!” Lauren yells out the last part, her words echoing in the vast emptiness of the barn making Ellen and I laugh. “She can be a bit intense,” Ellen teases, after Lauren leaves. “But I get it. She’s put so much into everything here. I feel like this will be her chance to get noticed without feeling like she’s been riding someone else’s coattails. She and Jack deserve this.” “They really do. I’ve never worked for people who not only love their work but also value their employees as much as you guys do,” I say, commending both of them for all their efforts. “It’s not hard when you have really amazing employees.” Ellen shrugs, looking down at her watch. “Speaking of employees, I gotta head back up to the office and finish up payroll if these employees expect to be paid for all their hard work.” Ellen and I pack everything up, bringing it with us to the office where I basically exchange it for the materials I’ll need to start the cider tastings. I get everything set up in the tasting room, but realize I still have time before we open. I step back and take a few pictures of the wine tasting room all decked out with the promotional materials for Apple Jacks and text it to Lauren. I figure she can use it on social media along with the other pictures I’ve taken. Maybe it’ll draw people to the winery and then subsequently bring people to Apple Jacks. Everyone loves a giveaway. Seconds later she pokes her head into the tasting room. “The picture is great,” she says, holding up her phone to show me she got it. “I’ll get this up on Instagram and see if we can get some tasters.”

“We’re pretty booked already today so that should help get the word out about the free samples and the survey,” I reply. “I’m really excited about getting this going.” “Me too. And I’m even more excited about the opening event even if it’s closed to the public. Why don’t you bring a date?” Lauren suggests as if she can sense that things with my online guy are working out. “Have you met anyone on the dating app?” I pause for a second, trying to figure out if I could consider what I’m doing online as meeting someone. We have a great time chatting, but we still haven’t met. I don’t think I’d call him my boyfriend either, but I guess we are sort of dating. “Yeah, I did meet someone, but haven’t met them yet,” I say, sounding confusing and silly. “Like we haven’t met in person, but we talk almost every night.” I pause again, giving my head a shake and wrinkling up my nose. “Actually, we haven’t talked either, just messaged through the app. It sounds stupid, doesn’t it?” I ask, feeling like what I’m doing is awkward as hell and hard to explain. I realize that dating now is very different than it once was. The internet has led people to some amazing connections, but it’s also led people to some really disastrous ones too. Right now I feel like she’s picturing me on an episode of Catfish. “We all thought she was crazy. I mean come on. No guy that nice is still single,” Lauren would say to Nev and then there’d be the split screen of my stupid shocked face when I realize the guy is like eighty-five years old or two fourteenyear-old girls who’ve been fucking with me this whole time. “No, it doesn’t sound stupid,” she says, but it feels like she’s placating me or maybe I’m just self-conscious about the whole damn thing. “Why don’t you see if he wants to meet you for a date? Then if he’s sketchy about it...” she trails off, not finishing her thought because she doesn’t want to say this whole thing might go to shit just like every relationship I’ve been in. “Yeah, I hear what you’re saying. Maybe the whole thing was stupid to begin with. I did take advice from Jack,” I say, trying to put a humorous spin on the situation.

“Seriously, invite the guy on a real date and see what happens. If it goes to shit, you know what I think...” Again she stops talking, hitting me with a suggestive glance, accompanied by a wink and a smile. “There’s someone here who I’m sure would be happy to take you out.” “Are you seriously still stuck on that? Tommy isn’t going to want to take me out on a date. I’m sure he’d also be pissed if he knew you were constantly trying to set me up with him. He’s all but said it. He thinks I’m some twit who’s too young to date seriously.” “You guys seem to be spending a lot of time together.” She shrugs casually, like us working on our bee project makes us suddenly compatible. “We have been, but that doesn’t mean he wants to date me.” “I’d beg to differ, but go ahead and see how things play out with your online guy. Maybe he’s the one and if not, Tommy looks really good without his shirt on.” She smiles at me, nodding her head to agree with herself and all I can do is laugh at how ridiculous this whole thing is. I wasn’t even supposed to be trying to find a boyfriend and now I’ve got Lauren shoving Tommy in my face and this online mystery guy keeping me up at night. But more than that, what Lauren says about Tommy has me wondering if maybe he really is interested in me and I’m just missing it.

Chapter Fourteen

Tommy

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: you ever think we should just say fuck it and meet up?

I don’t normally get messages from Wine Queen during the day, in fact I never do, so it surprises me when I hear the ping on my phone and see this question from her.

Me: yeah of course, do you?

The bubbles pop up and down, as though she’s thinking about her response or typing and deleting it. I’m not sure why that makes me nervous, but it does, so I slide my phone into my back pocket again, trying to ignore it as I go back to helping Jack with stocking the bar in the cider house tasting room. My phone eventually pings with another message and as I put the last bottle of cider from the box in the fridge, I pull my phone from my pocket again.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: yeah…but it also makes me nervous.

Me: why?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: idk…what if it’s not the same in real life, not as

good?

Me: what if it is? What if it’s better?

I exhale, leaning against the bar as I stare at my phone, willing her to respond, even though I’m not sure I actually believe my own words. I mean yeah, I’ve thought meeting up more times that I care to it. And while the idea does make me nervous, for the same reasons it makes her nervous, I can’t deny that I’m intrigued by this woman. And wondering if real life could be so much more than just good.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Yeah, I know…can we…I don’t know, wait a little longer?

Me: of course…I’m not going anywhere.

“Who you messaging?” Jack says, wandering over to stand beside as he peers over my shoulder at my phone. “No one,” I say, sliding my phone into my pocket again. Jack grins at me, his arms crossed over his chest. “Bullshit,” he says. “You’re sexting someone, aren’t you?” I roll my eyes as I grab another box of stock for the fridges. “I am not sexting anyone.” “Yeah, yeah, whatever. You ever check out that app I put on there?” he asks, as he moves down to start stacking the fridge with clean glasses.

I don’t answer him, my mind consumed with thoughts of Wine Queen and meeting her and what she really means when she says she wants to wait a little longer. “Tommy?” “What?” I snap, my voice harsher than I intend. “Whoa, slow your roll, buddy,” Jack says, hands up defensively. “Sorry,” I reply. “You okay, seriously?” he asks. I glance over and see he’s watching me, a concerned look on his face. “Yeah, I’m fine,” I say, letting out a long breath. “Just distracted.” “By…?” When I don’t answer, I see the fridge beside me open and Jack reach in and grab two bottles of cider. He opens them both and hands me one. “That’s your solution?” Jack grins. “Nothing an alcoholic beverage can’t fix, really.” I shake my head at him. “You Aussies are so weird.” Jack just shrugs and grins before taking a sip. “Come on, what’s going on?” I take a long pull of cold cider wondering if I should just say fuck it and tell Jack everything. What have I got to lose? I mean besides my dignity of course and any hope at future peace and quiet about all this from him. “Fuck it,” I eventually say. “Yeah, I have been using the app.” Jack’s grin widens. “And?” “And I’ve met someone on there,” I say. “So you are sexting someone,” Jack shouts, slapping a hand down on the bar.

“Tell me is it—” “We aren’t sexting,” I say, cutting him off. “At least not right now anyway.” I don’t even know why I it this, maybe to prove I’m not a total loser. Jack chuckles. “You dirty little dog. And you’re welcome by the way,” he adds with a wink. I narrow my brows. “Welcome, for what?” “For giving you the app,” he replies, throwing a hand out toward me. “Anyway, enough about that. You’ve met someone, you’re having virtual sex or whatever, which isn’t ever as good as the real thing, by the way, but anyway, tell me what the problem is?” I finish off the cider, shaking my head when Jack reaches for another with a questioning look on his face. Letting out a long slow breath, I finally tell him about today’s message and the whole meeting-up-but-it-not-happening-yet thing. “Do you want to meet up with her?” he asks when I finally finish. I scrub a hand down my face, suddenly wondering if maybe I should have said yes to the second drink. “Yeah.” “So tell her,” he says, as though it’s that simple. “What if this is all just a…” “A piss-take?” Jack asks. “A what?” Jack chuckles. “A piss-take. You’re worried she’s taking the piss.” He laughs again when he sees I still don’t get what he’s saying, shaking his head as he continues. “You think she’s making fun of you or maybe isn’t real?” “God, you say some weird shit,” I mutter. “But yeah, kind of.” “You shared any personal details or pictures?” He raises his brows in question as he gives me a grin.

“No, that’s kinda the whole point of the app, isn’t it?” “So like, no titty pics?” Jack sounds half disgusted and half disappointed and I can’t help but laugh. “No, it’s kinda not our thing.” “I thought tits were every guy’s thing?” Jack says and now I know he’s wondering what the hell is wrong with me. “Whatever,” I say, waving his question away. “The point is, do you think I should be worried she doesn’t want to meet yet or should I let it go?” Jack shrugs as he reaches for another tray of glasses to stack in the fridge. “I don’t know, I mean, maybe she’s nervous so yeah, she wants to wait. You could just continue to have fun chatting with her and see what happens.” “You think?” “Does make for lonely nights though,” Jack continues, as though he hasn’t even heard my question. “So, I guess your other option is to find someone else to have fun with while you wait for this chick to wanna hook up.” “What?” I practically shout. Jack laughs. “I mean, there’s no rule here, right? It’s not like you’re being exclusive or anything.” “Well, I’m not chatting with anyone else, if that’s what you’re asking.” “Is she?” he asks, glancing over at me. “I dunno,” I it. “I’ve never asked.” “Right,” Jack says. “So, just have some fun then.” “With?” I ask, my eyes roaming the room as if to emphasize my point. Jack’s grin widens and I groan, because I know exactly what he’s going to say. “Don’t,” I say, holding up a hand to him. “Don’t even go there.” “What?” he asks, his voice laced with mock innocence as he holds his arms out

to me. “You know you fancy her. Just fucking ask her out?” “Oh my fucking god, I don’t know why I bother.” “Tommy, come on, seriously,” Jack starts, but the rest of whatever else he was about to say is cut off by Lauren running into the tasting room and throwing herself at Jack. He immediately wraps her in his arms, kissing her enthusiastically as she tries to tell him something she’s clearly excited about. As weird as it is to stand here and watch them, it’s also hard to look away. Hard to not see what they have and want the same thing. I turn back to the box of cider bottles, finish stacking them in the fridge as I gather up all the cardboard and head out the back to the recycling. As I flatten all the boxes, my mind turns over Jack’s comments, wondering if I should push meeting up with Wine Queen or just leave it and hope she comes around. I mean, it’s not like this whole sex drought is a new thing. I’ve been single for months now. Doesn’t mean I like it though. After I throw the last of the boxes in, I grab my hat and puffer can from the shed and head into the orchard, making my way over to the beehives to check on how things are going. I’m half-hoping Penny will be there, but I’m pretty sure she’s working now and when I reach the hives, I can see the place is deserted, nothing but the quiet hum of our bees filling the air. Despite knowing I look ridiculous, I pull on the netted hat and spray the area with smoke, before lifting the lid of the first hive. “Holy shit,” I say when I see just how much honey has now been made. Pulling my phone from my pocket, I carefully position the inserts and snap a couple of shots, before replacing them inside the hive. I check the others, amazed at how much has changed in the short time we’ve had them up and running. Once I’m done, I pull off the stupid hat Penny enjoys laughing at me in and fire off a quick text, attaching a couple of the photos I’ve taken.

Me: check this out…might nearly be time to start making that mead you’ve been talking about.

Penny: holy shit! Our bees are making honey!

Me: LOL, they are – you got any mead recipes to try out yet?

Penny: no, aren’t you the wine and cider maker???

Me: well yeah, but I’m not flying solo in this little venture, now am I?

Penny sends back a whole row of the eye rolling emojis, which actually makes me laugh out loud. I’m about to reply, when the bubbles continue, letting me know she isn’t finished.

Penny: fine, I’ll do some research…but don’t blame me when it tastes like shit!

Me: would I do that?

Penny: YES!!!!

I realize I’m standing in the middle of Melrose Hive with a stupid ass grin on my face as I text a girl that I regularly have completely inappropriate thoughts about. Grateful no one is around to see me, I fire off another text to her.

Me: whatever…I’ll do some research too, so we can both wear the blame, ok… happy?

Penny: ohhhhh, the things you do for me But yes, let’s do this! We can have a tasting session before we unleash it on everyone else. Should we get started this weekend?

Me: it’s a date.

Chapter Fifteen

Penny

It’s a date... I have no idea why, but I want to run around and squeal like a teenage girl and call all my friends and tell them I have a date. It’s this weird giddy feeling of excitement that flutters in my belly and up into my chest, making it feel like it’s hard to breathe. It feels like my whole body is vibrating, like something real and kinetic is happening between us. I’m being completely fucking ridiculous. This is a work thing, not a legitimate date and the schoolgirl in me needs to get my shit together, because this could end up being something huge. Not whatever I think this thing between Tommy and me is, but the whole bees and honey and mead. This is a winery and now a place that produces cider. If we’re any good at this, I may be able to convince Lauren, Ellen and Jack to let us mass-produce the mead and bring in even more revenue for the business. I grab a book I bought about the bees and flip to a small section about mead making, but it’s really very basic, only giving a few details about how it’s mass produced. We certainly won’t be mass-producing anything for a while. This could all be a total failure and taste like complete shit. I turn to the Internet, which is a little better, but it’s mostly just information on how to make mead in your home, which is essentially what we’ll be doing at first. But all they talk about is using store bought honey and we definitely don’t have store bought honey. Ours is the real fucking deal with dead bee bodies stuck in it and I’m sure all kinds of bacteria. I’m about two hours into my search when my phone chimes out with a notification from Mystery Matchmaker. Since I’ve started talking to C. Grizwold I decided to turn off the private message feature to anyone else. I don’t want to continue to be inundated with dick pics or guys trying to see if I’m available. I found a good one and I’m sticking to it.

C.Grizwold: What you up to tonight?

Me: Doing some research for work. A pretty exciting night, huh?

C.Grizwold: Are you a scientist?

I immediately laugh out loud at his question. I realize we don’t know each other that well since we haven’t really shared anything about our jobs with each other, but a scientist? He has no idea how off he is.

Me: Fuck no. Not even close. What are you up to tonight?

C.Grizwold: Not much. I stayed late at work and am just now getting home.

Me: A workaholic, huh? Sometimes I feel like all I have out here is my job. I moved from the east coast a while back and still haven’t really found my people.

This is the most personal I’ve gotten with him and something about it feels weird, like I shouldn’t be sharing it with him. But, if we ever want to take this thing beyond the safety and anonymity of the Internet, I guess we need to start sharing.

C.Grizwold: Yeah, I hear you. I feel like all I really do is work too. I was in a

long-term relationship, but it didn’t work out because of my job. She wasn’t interested in staying in the area and I know I don’t want to leave.

Me: How long-term?

I ask the question not because I’m trying to feel him out, but because I’m genuinely curious. I’ve never lasted more than a year in a relationship, mostly because I tend to get bored. A part of me wonders if I’m even cut out for something that lasts. Maybe I’ll always just be a restless soul. I never expected to last more than a year in Napa, thinking I’d be on the move before long, not ever being able to settle, but here I am two years later and not even considering moving on. Maybe I’m ready for something more serious or maybe I need someone who is just as restless as me.

C.Grizwold: It was five years, but she wasn’t present for most of them and I knew that. It was easier to stay than to leave, I think.

Me: I’ve been there. Sometimes you just go through the motions so you aren’t alone.

C.Grizwold: I don’t think I mind being alone.

The bubbles pop up immediately after his last message and I don’t respond, waiting for what he has to say.

C.Grizwold: That came out wrong. I don’t mind being alone, but if I met the

right person I think I would feel differently.

He’s back peddling and it’s kind of cute. He’s worried he insulted me and all the time we’ve spent chatting, but far from it.

Me: I understood what you meant. Being alone is easy. It’s the relationship I have a hard time with. But I think if I met the right person I would feel differently.

I quote his words back to him, teasing him just a little and as I do, I try to picture his face. It’s far harder than I ever thought it would be, but I imagine he’s pensive and serious, a cautious pessimist that can change when presented with something that makes him happy.

Me: I think you’re a little jaded by the world and that’s so fucking great. I don’t really trust people who are inherently happy and can’t find the bullshit that floats on the surface of everything.

C.Grizwold: Glad to find another jaded soul.

We end the conversation there and I get back to my mead research, wanting to make sure I’m prepared to share what I’ve learned with Tommy tomorrow. I want this to work, and I know my main goal of all of this was just to draw the bees away from the orchard, but it has morphed into so much more. I feel like I have more of a purpose at Somerville’s now, and not that my job in the tasting room isn’t important, it is, but this is something that could possibly lend itself to bringing more revenue and bringing in more people. It’s a bigger contribution than I’ve ever made to anything in my life.

I wake up early the next morning, going for a run and then I head over to the vineyard. I have no idea if Tommy will be there already or how long any of this will take. The one thing I do know is that I have this weird nervous excitement coursing through my body. It’s a feeling that I’m onto something new and different and big. It’s the same feeling I had when I left Massachusetts, a feeling that I was bound for something bigger, something better than the crowdedness of Boston and the hum of the city that never let me think. It feels like it just took me this long to find it. I round the corner and find Tommy waiting for me by Melrose Hive, he’s decked out in bee gear, making me laugh just a little as I approach him. His face is serious, a concentrated look that’s pensive and dark, but when he looks up, it melts away revealing an effortless smile that blankets his face. “Hey! You ready to do this?” he asks, and it takes me a second to catch up. I’m wrapped up in his features and the sudden perfection his smile brings to this moment. He lifts his hat, looking directly at me, his head cocked to the side as he watches me. I take several oddly cautious steps toward him, almost like I feel a shift in who we once were. Something is different and I now see it far more clearly than I have. We’ve grown closer over these last few months and what was once a work acquaintance relationship has formed into a friendship I never saw coming and it makes me realize I’m not as alone as I thought I was last night. “Yes,” I finally reply, picking up my step and aligning with where he’s standing. He has several plastic tubs and in one of them is the bee-proof suits we ordered a few weeks back. Most of the supplies we already have here at Somerville’s, but there were some things we needed to pick up, like a honey extractor, which should be interesting. It’s this hand crank machine that neither one of us has ever used. “I guess we put these guys on,” Tommy says, his face now turned up in a bothered smirk. He hands me a suit and I slip it on over my clothes. It’s still cool here given it’s early and the suit actually helps warm me up a little.

“Okay, let’s do this,” I announce, with Tommy standing in front of one of our hives while I’m holding the smoke can. “Why don’t we start here since this hive is the largest,” he suggests as he begins to remove the top. We move the bees lower into the hive and any remaining ones we push off with smoke, causing them to fly away. As we pull the super out, we have to force a few more bees away, eventually getting it so we can put the super into one of the tubs Tommy brought with him. We repeat this step until we’ve collected all the supers from the hives, but by now the sun is beating down on us and I’m sweating like my body is fucking crying for me to pull this damn suit off and jump in the lake. “This fucking suit is killing me,” I call out, as we finish up the last of the collection. It feels like I pissed myself, my clothes so wet that I’ll need to peel them off of me. “I’m sweating like I’ve spent ten hours on a treill,” Tommy calls back, his words a little muffled behind the hat. “They say success is ninety percent perspiration,” I joke with him, laughing a little as I catch a glimpse of his shiny face. Good thing we’re wearing these full suits, because I’m glad he can’t see exactly what I look like right now. “Dude, I fucking sweat like this opening a beer. Do you think people see me and think, ‘Man, that guy’s really made it big.’ Or do I just look like an alcoholic?” I can’t control the hard laugh that leaves my mouth, stopping me in my tracks. He’s a totally different person than who I ever thought he was and it’s refreshing. There’s a reason Lauren and Ellen have remained friends with him for so long and I’m finally getting a glimpse of it. “You do not. I’ve seen you around and you’re in great shape.” “Thanks. I think that’s the first compliment you’ve ever given me,” he says, and I swear he could be blushing behind that hat just a little. “Are you fishing for compliments, Tommy Andrews? That’s pretty cheesy of you if you are,” I tease. “Oh, Tommy, you’re so strong and manly. Maybe one day you could rescue me from a burning building or from drowning,” I croon,

my voice breathy and sugary sweet. “You really know how to kill a moment, huh?” he deadpans in mock disgust, but behind it all, he’s beaming and I’m enjoying this far too much. We both grab a plastic tub, hauling it over to one of the sheds that’s on the far end of the property. It’s not used for wine making any longer, but a lot of the old supplies are stored in it. It’s one of the original sheds from when the place was started all those years ago, and now that technology has caught up, they don’t really have any use for making small-batch wine. It’s the perfect set up for us to experiment with mead making. “How long have you worked here?” I ask, as we’re walking. “I don’t really know. A long time, I guess,” Tommy responds, but continues again, adding more to the story. “I started working here back when Ellen and I were in high school, but I took a break when I went to college.” “Oh, I didn’t realize you went to college. Where?” “Washington, but I didn’t last. Only made it a year before I was back here. It wasn’t for me, I guess.” He says that last part a little quieter, almost as if he’s embarrassed by what most would consider a failure. “College wasn’t my thing either. Obviously, I’m working in the tasting room at a winery.” “But maybe this is your thing,” he says, motioning around to the vast land covered in grapevines and rolling hills in the distance. “And maybe it’s yours too.”

Chapter Sixteen

Tommy

It’s hard to pinpoint exactly when things started to change between us, but they definitely have. Somewhere along the way we’ve gone from being work colleagues to friends; two people who can hang out, give each other shit and enjoy a few laughs. But as cool as it’s been and as much as I’m enjoying spending time with her, I can’t read too much into it. Because friends are all we can ever be. Friends are all we ever should be. “So, what did you learn in all of your research?” Penny asks when we get the last of the tubs with the supers into the shed. I throw my hat onto one of the long work benches before unzipping the front of my suit. I’m drenched underneath it, the material clinging to my clothes, which are stuck to my skin. “I didn’t,” I say, shrugging my shoulders out as I peel the suit off my torso. “Weren’t you gonna figure that part out?” Penny pauses, her zipper half undone as she narrows her brows at me. “Seriously?” I grin. “Nah, course not,” I reply, shoving the suit pants down my legs. “Just giving you shit, Pen. Fuck me, that’s hot,” I mutter, throwing the suit across the end of the table. When I turn around, Penny is still staring at me, only this time she’s got a strange look on her face, kind of a little dazed, with her wide eyes and her mouth open a little. “What?” Her mouth snaps shut as she swallows hard, shaking her head. “Nothing,” she mutters, now peeling her own suit off. Underneath, she’s wearing a t-shirt and a

pair of cut-off shorts, her skin glistening with sweat, as the fabric of her shirt clings to her body, letting me know about every single dip and curve. “Fuck,” I murmur on an exhale as I shove a hand through my hair. Penny throws her suit over with mine before lifting one of the tubs onto the bench. “So, we gotta cut all the wax off,” she says, reaching for the knife. The way her lean body stretches over the bench nearly has me groaning out loud and wondering if this was such a smart idea after all. “You know how to do it?” I ask, tipping my head toward the knife. Penny turns, holding the huge knife up as she spins it in her hand like she’s some sort of ninja. “Yeah, I think so.” “You think so?” I ask, a brow raised in question. “Because that’s a seriously big and seriously sharp knife you’re wielding, you know that, right?” Her mouth widens with a grin, her tongue poking out at the corner as she meets my gaze. “You scared, Tommy?” Now it’s me grinning, as I reach my hand out and wrap it around her wrist. “Of you or the knife?” Her fingers tighten on the handle, the breathy, “Both,” she lets out suggesting I’m not the only one somehow affected by all the heat that’s suddenly swirling between us, both literally and metaphorically. I let out a low chuckle. “Just don’t chop your fingers off, okay?” I tell her. “I’m not sure I’m up for picking up all your stumps before I take you to the hospital to get them stitched back on.” Penny laughs as she shoots me a smirk, shoving me back with a hand on my chest. “Watch and learn, Tommy Andrews. Watch and learn.” I take a step back, leaning against the workbench, arms crossed over my chest. Penny pulls on some gloves before picking up the first super. She methodically works through the wax with the knife, cutting it away so the honey falls into the clean container we’re collecting it in. She’s precise and careful, cleaning away every bit she can.

It’s hard work though, and inside, the shed is hot under the full afternoon sun, even with the doors open. After she’s done a couple of them, she lays the knife down, swiping an arm across her forehead. “You wanna try?” she asks. She’s got a smear of dirt across her forehead now that also has a leaf stuck in it. Her shirt is still drenched in sweat, only now there’s a sticky, honey-like residue covering it and her arms. She looks like a mess, but somehow still totally fucking hot, all at the same time. “Sure thing,” I tell her, smiling as I pick up the knife. “What are you laughing at?” she asks, as she hops up on the workbench so she’s sitting watching me. “I’m not laughing,” I say, shaking my head even as I’m still smiling. “You are,” she says, gently kicking the side of my ass. “You’re laughing right now.” I chuckle. “I’m not, I swear.” “Tommy!” she half shouts. “You can’t say you’re not laughing at the same time as you’re actually laughing!” I have to put the knife down, because now I am legit laughing out loud, unable to stop. Penny kicks my ass again as she says, “Seriously, what the hell are you laughing at?” I reach for the knife again, taking a deep breath as I wave it in her direction. “Quite the picture, Pen,” I say as I turn back to the super. She pulls her phone from her back pocket and taps away at the screen. “Oh shit,” she mutters when I’m guessing she gets a look at herself in the camera. I chuckle expecting her to pull the leaf from her forehead. But she doesn’t, instead surprising me as she leans over and says, “Here, look up.” I do and see she’s holding her phone up to take a picture of us. “Wait, hold up,” I

say, turning away. “Tommy,” she groans because of course she thinks I’m chickening out. She’s always taking sneaky pictures of me and most of the time, I do turn away, confused about why I always seem to be the focus of her gaze. Not this time though. “Two seconds, Little Miss Impatient,” I say, as I turn back and stick a few more random twigs and leaves to her face, before adding a now dead bee to the end of her nose. “Alright, go for it.” She turns the camera back on herself to see what I’ve done, rolling her eyes even though she’s smiling. Then she leans over again and just as I think she’s about to take the picture, she grabs my cheeks in her hand, squeezing them between her fingers as she snaps a selfie of us. “Perfect,” she says with a grin. I give her a teasing smirk. “So, still documenting this shit show then?” Penny gives me a shove, smiling as she looks at the picture she’s just taken. “It’s not a shit show. It’s going to be awesome.” I laugh. “Uh huh, well it’s gonna need a name if it ever takes off.” “A what?” I glance up at her. “A name, for the mead,” I add, gesturing toward the bucket of mostly honey we now have. “You think?” “Sure,” I tell her, as I grab some of the other equipment I’d bought. We need to strain and filter the honey, get rid of all the dead bees and other crap that’s gotten caught in it. Then it needs to be boiled to kill off any bacteria and stuff before we start the fermentation process. It’s gonna be quicker than making wine or cider, but we’re still winging the whole process. Basically trying shit out as we go based off what we’ve read on the internet.

“Okay, I guess we better come up with something.” I give her a wink. “Guess we better.” “Oooh and an Instagram page too. We can tie it to Somerville’s and Apple Jacks, but we should have our own for when we’re famous and stuff.” Penny’s smiling, her excitement obvious as she starts listing all the other things we will need for this business venture we’re apparently on. “Okay, okay, settle down, we gotta make it drinkable first.” “Honestly,” she says, nudging me with her foot. “Where’s your positivity?”

Couple of hours later and our honey is now clean and boiled and currently bottled in jars waiting to be turned into mead. We’re going with a single batch first up, no fancy flavoring or anything, just to make sure we know what we’re doing and aren’t going to kill anyone. If this works out, we’ll think about adding other stuff to create some different flavors. “You good?” I ask we put away the equipment and head outside. “No, I’m filthy,” Penny says looking down at herself. “Like covered in honey and whatever shit decided to stick to it.” I let out a laugh. “Yeah, me too. Definitely need a shower. Come on, let’s head back to Somerville’s.” We take the work truck back down to the main building of the winery, both of us literally peeling ourselves off the seats just to get out of the car. “Shit,” Penny mutters as she stands by the side of the truck, looking at herself. “What?” “I don’t wanna get in my car like this,” she says, glancing up at me. “I mean, I know it’s a shitbox, but still.” “Yeah, I—”

My words are cut off as Oscar walks past, takes one look at us and bursts out laughing. “Oh my god, you two look like sh—” “Hey!” Penny shouts, smiling even as she holds a finger up to him in warning. “What?” he asks, arms out in mock innocence. I can’t stop the laugh as I glance at Penny, who is also fighting a smile. “I mean, seriously, guys,” Oscar continues, his hands now on his hips. “I don’t know what’s going on here.” He waves a hand between the two of us. “But you definitely need a shower.” Before either of us can say anything more, Olivia wanders over, standing beside her brother, her arms crossed as she looks from Penny to me and back to Penny again. “This is worse than when Uncle Jack got covered in that rotten wine,” she says, turning to her brother. Oscar gives a nod of his head. “Right, total shit show.” “Oscar!” Penny says again, even as I start laughing. “Get out of here, you two,” I say, stepping toward them. “Before I come and give both of you a big sticky hug.” I hold my arms out wide, crouching down a little as I walk toward them. Olivia squeals, grabbing Oscar’s arm as she attempts to pull him away. Oscar doesn’t move at first, just watches as I get closer and closer to them, his little brow narrowed as though he’s trying to figure out how serious I am. Just as I am about to reach them, he holds a hand up. “Nope, I’m out,” and then he and Olivia turn and run, the laughter floating back to us as they head into the main building. I turn to Penny, who’s smiling as she watches me. “What?” “You’re good with them,” she says, tipping her head in the direction they ran off in.

I shrug, not quite sure how to respond to that. “I’ve known them all their life,” I say. “They’re good kids.” “They are,” she says, nodding. “Cheeky little shits, but funny too.” I turn back to the work car. “Yeah, worse now they’ve got Jack to imitate and look up to.” Penny laughs. “Oh my god, I caught Oscar trying to do an Australian accent the other day, it was hilarious.” I chuckle, because I’ve heard him try it too. “Yeah, he’s pretty bad at it.” “Oh yeah,” Penny responds. “Anyway, guess I better try and drive my car home without actually touching any part of it.” I open the door of the work truck, pausing to look at her over the roof. “Hop in,” I say. Penny tilts her head to the side, a confused look on her face as she stares at me over the roof of the truck. “Hop in,” I say again. “We’ll head up to my place and shower. I’ll drive you back afterward.” I slide into the driver’s side without waiting for her answer, without stopping to think about why the hell I even asked her to come back to my place. Penny’s never been to my house and I’m not sure why I’m asking her to come back there now. Yeah, we both need a shower, but she’s also got a car and a shower back at her place, I’m sure. She could just as easily drive home and shower there, without ever stepping foot in my house. So why the fuck did I suggest it just now? I turn on the ignition, not wanting to process what I’ve just done or why. The enger door is still closed and I figure Penny also doesn’t know what to make of my suggestion and isn’t planning on taking me up on it. Shoving the car into reverse, I’m about to drive home when the enger door opens and Penny gets

in.

Chapter Seventeen

Penny

“This is your house?” I ask, trying to mask the shock as I stare slack-jawed at the beautiful structure in front of us. We took a small gravel-paved road toward the back of the Somerville property, winding through the grapevines and along the mountainside, a place I’ve never ventured in the time I’ve worked here. I’ve never had any reason to come back here, especially after Lauren had told me it pretty much dead-ended here. But it far from ended in the way I pictured. My brain had conjured up images of overgrown land dotted with trees and the occasional wild-growing grapevine, but certainly not a stunning custom home built atop a small hillside that looks down on the vineyards of Somerville’s. “Yeah, why?” Tommy asks, but as much as he’s trying to remain casual, he’s failing. There’s this nervous energy sparking in the air around us as he looks at the house and then back at me. “Um, well, you never fucking mentioned that you live in the most beautiful house on the property. How the hell did you score this one while Lauren and Jack live in the cottage out front?” I lift my chin in what I assume is the direction of the entrance, but I have no idea exactly where we are. Tommy doesn’t answer right away but walks up to a door on the side of the house near the garage. “I bought the land from Lauren and Ellen about ten years ago and built the house,” he now says shyly, like he’s itting to robbing a bank once. “Okay, let’s go back a few steps,” I say, pausing behind him as he opens the door. “So, you built the house with your bare hands, like all on your own?” He laughs a little, chucking mindlessly as if what I’ve said is totally ridiculous. What’s ridiculous is that I had no idea he lived here. I also have no idea why I

got in his truck and decided to come home with him. It’s late and I should probably just go home, but I was intrigued by his invite and our sudden friendship. “Well, not exactly on my own, but yes. I did a lot of the work on my own.” We step inside and I try to control the obnoxious gasp that falls from my lips, pretending to it off as a cough. While the house isn’t massive or anything, it has these vaulted ceilings and oversized wood beams and beautiful tall windows that show the landscape in all directions. “I guess I didn’t...” I start, but cut myself off, unsure of what to say that isn’t going to come out mildly insulting. Tommy is rugged and dirty and rough around the edges. His hair is always disheveled, and he rarely shaves on a regular basis, living with a five o’clock shadow that tends to push a few extra days. His nose is a little crooked as if he’s been in a fight or two, and he’s always carried himself as if he gives no fucks, but this house screams otherwise. The house is spotless and impeccably decorated and while it’s clear it’s a guy’s house, it’s as masculine as he is dirty, it’s also far more welcoming than I ever would’ve expected. “I guess you really put down roots here, huh?” I say, changing my course and not wanting to insult him by saying his house doesn’t match his dirty-who-givesa-fuck attitude. “Yeah, guess so,” he says, but his words are clipped and quiet. “Bathroom’s over here.” He walks toward a small hallway, pointing to a door. “Hang on and I’ll grab you something to change into,” he adds, walking away quickly. “Okay,” I reply, dragging out the word as he basically runs away from me. One minute he’s joking around with me and we’re chatting and laughing and now he’s all weirded out by me being in his house. He’s the one who invited me back here. He comes back a few seconds later and thrusts a t-shirt and a pair of boxer shorts at me, but barely makes eye .

“I hope these are clean,” I say, holding up the boxers. “If not, it’ll be like your naked balls and dick are touching my coochie.” His cheeks glow bright red instantly and even I’m embarrassed by what I’ve just said. Sometimes I swear I have no control over what comes out of my mouth when things get awkward. “Sorry,” I mutter, slipping into the bathroom before he can answer, slamming the door behind me. I quickly turn on the water, letting the sound of it drown out the exasperated sigh of embarrassment that is expelled from my mouth. But not only that, I’m hoping Tommy has disappeared or if he hasn’t, I hope he can’t hear me in here muttering to my stupid self. “Oh my fucking god, you idiot. You said coochie in front of him. What the hell is wrong with you?” I’m staring at myself in the mirror, shaming the mortified face looking back at me. This will definitely be a quick visit and I honestly should just shower and walk my ass back to where my car is parked near the entrance to Somerville’s. It’ll save me the mortifying encounter that will happen when I finally emerge from this bathroom wearing his coochie boxers. There’s no way he’s going to look at me wearing them and not think of my crotch. I look around his bathroom and it’s beautiful and perfect and it smells like eucalyptus and the steam from the shower makes it feel far more comforting than it should. I step out of my clothes and into the shower, the hot water spilling over my sore muscles making me moan out loud. Who would’ve thought harvesting honey would be so grueling and that it would take all day? I can attribute my stupidity to being tired and just all around worn out. I can’t be bothered with thinking about what to say. At least that’s the excuse I’m telling myself as I enjoy this shower far too much. The idea that I should shower quickly and go has all been lost. The damn shower is the size of the bathroom in my apartment and it has a rainfall showerhead and this handheld nozzle and these wall jets that seem to be placed so strategically that they hit every sore muscle in my body.

I’m never leaving. I live here now in Tommy’s bathroom and he’s just going to have to find a way to evict me, because I’m not going anywhere. He’s the fool who invited me back to his place not realizing that my apartment smells like Nona’s Italian Palace and hasn’t been updated since Reagan was in office. Saying it’s the size of a postage stamp would be generous, but this bathroom, it’s the size of the fucking Taj Mahal. So yeah, I’m staying. I’m standing under the spray of hot water, the sweat and grime of the day washing away along with my embarrassment, but don’t worry, it creeps back in just when I find a little peace. “Coochie. You said fucking coochie to Tommy Andrews and it will forever be seared into your brain. So now every time you see him, he’s going to you as the girl who called her vagina a coochie,” I mutter, cranking the water a little hotter in the hopes it burns my memories too.

After what feels like forever, I steel up the courage to get out and put on the clothes Tommy gave me. I gather up my dirty ones, tossing them in a pile off to the side while I look through the drawers for something to comb my hair with. I find a brush and I run it through, checking myself in the mirror quickly and my ruddy, shower-heated face is looking back at me. “Here goes nothing,” I say, gathering my dirty clothes and opening the bathroom door. When I open the door, I’m hit with the most amazing smell of something cooking. When you live above an Italian restaurant, nothing you cook smells good. It’s all melded together with the smell of garlic and tomatoes, but Tommy’s kitchen smells like heaven. Why is he doing this to me? Is he trying to keep me here to see how many stupid things he can get me to say by making me have awkward silences and weird conversations? I round the corner and find him standing in the kitchen, his back to me, and his hair is wet, but at least he’s wearing a shirt, because I don’t think I could handle it if he weren’t. I’m a total disaster and I have no idea why.

Obviously, he’s hot, but hot guys don’t frazzle me. It’s the exact opposite. Hot guys I can handle, but there’s something about Tommy that’s smarter and intense and fuck it, frazzling now. “It smells really good,” I say, breaking the silence, knowing commenting on the food won’t come across as weird. “It’s leftovers from a recipe the chef at Apple Jacks is trying out. Some pork and apple thing. I figured you were probably hungry too,” he says, turning around and leaning back against the counter. “Or I can take you back to your car and you can go,” he continues, motioning to the door. “Um, yeah, I’m hungry, but I don’t have to stay if you’d rather...” I trail off, wondering why things between us have taken on this strange awkwardness. We spent the whole day together, talking and laughing, but now we’re lingering between crossing a line and running. It’s almost this wound-up sexual tension and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t find him attractive. But as my mind wanders to thoughts of Tommy, I’m hit with all my conversations with C. Grizwold and what I’m doing here feels somewhat wrong. He’s not my boyfriend and Tommy isn’t either and maybe the vibe I’m getting from him is being read all wrong. Maybe he’s just being nice. He does live out here all alone and I get what it feels like to be alone sometimes. Sometimes it just feels lonely. “I have plenty,” he says, sliding a plate across the island between us. “You want a glass of wine?” “Sure.” “By the way, the boxers are clean,” he adds, laughing a little and I bite down hard on my bottom lip, looking down instantly at what I’m wearing. “Thanks for the reminder of my stupidity. Can we go back to talking about your house?” I reply willfully, my cheeks burning. “It’s pretty fucking amazing. You must really like it here.” I take a bite, interrupting him from being able to respond as I moan out loud. The food at Somerville’s is always delicious, so I shouldn’t be surprised that this is also unbelievable.

“Good, right?” Tommy asks, looking down at the plate in front of him. “I imagine it tastes even better when it’s not nuked.” “It pairs really well with this wine too,” I say, taking a hearty drink. I should slow down since I do have to drive home. “Yeah, I think Jack would prefer it paired with cider since that’s the point of the menu, but I don’t have any on hand.” “So, tell me a little more about your house. How come you chose to build it here on the property?” He takes a deep breath and reaches for his glass of wine. The drink he takes is even bigger than the one I took, and something about it makes me match his. We’re now sitting here with empty glasses and Tommy refills them with a heavier pour this time. “I don’t know why I chose to build it here. It felt like the right thing to do...” He falls short of finishing his thought, his words cut off by an ission he fails to say out loud. “Sometimes what you once believed was the right thing now feels like a lie,” I say, knowing I’ve been there. It’s not so much regret as it feels false, like you’ve lied to yourself. “Yeah, I guess that’s a good way to look at it. I love the house and the land and being here, but it feels like it keeps me from...” He stops short again, shrugging his shoulders. Simultaneously we pick up our glasses, drinking again and for every drink we take, we certainly haven’t eaten enough. This nervous energy swirls around us, making my stomach flutter and making this wine go down far too easy. I watch his mouth on the rim of the glass, his tongue slipping out and wetting his lips as he sets the glass down. The rise and fall of his chest, the hard swallow that shifts his throat, and each one of these things becomes more pronounced as I begin to notice the small things about him, small things that draw me to him and make me want to stay.

Before we know it the bottle of wine is gone and we’re halfway through a second bottle, but that awkwardness has sure faded, and it’s been replaced with a giddiness that only comes from being tipsy. “Did you know I can touch my tongue to my nose?” I ask, like he would have a clue that I can do this. It’s not like it’s a skill that’s used to sell wine in the tasting room. “That’s some serious talent. See that, I thought you could just raise bees, but this is another level kind of shit. Let’s see it,” Tommy says, but his words are slurred a little and it makes me giggle like a desperate teenage girl. I stick my tongue out, extending it out and touching the tip of my nose. “Ta dah!” I announce, throwing my arms out to the side as if I’ve just done something worthy of applause. “Okay, now I thought it would be gross, but it was kinda hot,” Tommy says, winking at me and laughing. “Why do you always gotta give me shit?” I whine, shoving him as we stand in the kitchen still, but as soon as my hand connects with the bare skin on his arm, I feel it. It’s like an electric shock. The wine is now in full effect and I’m starting to think I won’t be able to get home unless I call an Über. “Tell me something you can do.” “I don’t have a clue,” he replies lamely. “Sometimes you’re such an ass. Have fun once in a while, Tommy Andrews. Live a little. You don’t always have to be so—” Before I can finish my thought, Tommy’s muscular arms close around me, his rough, calloused hand slides around my neck and he pulls my mouth to his. The surprise of his kiss pulls the air from my lungs and makes my lips burn for more, for it to never stop. This is probably a terrible idea, but I can’t bring myself to care and he kisses me long enough for me to forget all the reasons we shouldn’t be doing this. It’s with lust and desperation, and it breathes life back into me, reminding me why boys can be so fucking great.

His mouth moves to my neck, biting and sucking and kissing and I take in a hard breath of air, asking, “What are you doing?” But silently pleading for him not to stop. “Someone told me to live a little.” He pulls back, looking at me. The brown of his eyes is nearly lost, his pupils wide and full of desire and the swell of his lips makes me want to kiss him again. “Kiss me again,” I say, my words quiet, but telling. “Kiss me until you’re sick of me and you tell me to go home.” “Don’t go home.”

Chapter Eighteen

Tommy

Live a little. That’s what she said, and in this moment, that’s exactly what I’m doing. And honestly, I really don’t care if it’s wrong or a bad idea or possibly fueled by too much alcohol, because the second I start kissing Penny I realize I don’t ever want to stop kissing her. “Tommy…” she groans as my tongue traces her bottom lip. I feel her hands fist the material of my t-shirt, pulling me closer as she slides them underneath and over the bare skin of my back. Her touch feels like tiny jolts of electricity across my skin and this time it’s me groaning. I trail a path of kisses along her jaw again, nipping at her ear before kissing and sucking her neck. Her skin is warm and soft and smells of sandalwood from the soap in my shower and I can’t stop myself from inhaling, from breathing her in. Her head falls back, giving me more access, which I take full advantage of; my mouth dipping lower into the V of my t-shirt that she’s wearing. “Fuck,” she moans, as her hands grip my hair, pressing my face into her skin almost in encouragement. As I trace a path with my tongue between her breasts, somewhere in the back of my brain, a voice is reminding me that this is a work colleague, a much younger work colleague. That all of this could be a really fucking bad idea that only ends in one thing: a super awkward work environment tomorrow. Penny’s hands sliding down to my ass banishes that voice though as I’m reminded once again of what’s happening right now. Live a little. Deciding I don’t give a fuck about tomorrow, I slip my hands to Penny’s ass, hitching her body up into my arms so she has to wrap her legs around my waist.

With my mouth still on her neck, I walk us out of the kitchen and down the hall to my bedroom at the opposite end of the house. I drop Pen onto my bed, stepping back to watch her as she looks around the room. “Holy shit,” she breathes out, her eyes wide as they take in the floor to ceiling windows that span an entire wall, showcasing the sweeping views of grapevines and trees, before moving to the stone fireplace built into the wall opposite the bed. “How the fuck do you live here?” she asks, turning back to me. I grin. “You really love my house, don’t you?” “Uh huh,” she says, nodding. “I think I’m gonna move in.” I chuckle, leaning forward as I force her back so she’s lying on the bed beneath me. I place a hand on either side of her, my body hovering over hers but not touching. “Is that so?” I ask, leaning down to brush my lips against hers. “Yes,” she murmurs, her hands grabbing my t-shirt and pulling it up and over my head. “Oh, jesus christ,” she says, her eyes raking over my chest as she throws the shirt on the floor. “What’s wrong?” I murmur, my mouth back on her neck. I feel her fingers brush across my chest, trailing between my pecs and down to my stomach. Goosebumps follow her touch, my dick twitching as it now tents the crotch of my sweats. “Nothing’s wrong,” she breathes out, her finger hooking into the waistband of my sweats and pulling me closer. I smile against her mouth, resisting the pull. “Your turn,” I whisper, my hands grabbing the bottom of her shirt and pulling it off. She’s not wearing anything underneath it and the sight of her lying half naked on my bed nearly undoes me. “Fuck me,” I groan as my mouth moves to her breast, sucking on her nipple. Penny arches beneath me, her hands in my hair, fingers gripping and pulling as

she holds me against her. “Yes,” she breathes out. “God, yes.” I lift my head, letting go of her nipple with a pop as I gaze down at her. “You sure you wanna do this?” Penny’s face is flushed, her eyes glazed over with a combination of lust and alcohol as she looks at me. “Do what exactly?” The corner of my mouth tugs up in a grin and I totally blame the fucking alcohol for what comes out of my mouth next. “Let my naked dick and balls get up close and personal with your coochie?” Pen’s mouth falls open, her cheeks darkening as she slaps a hand across my mouth. “You ass,” she half yells, even as I’m laughing beneath her hand. I gently bite on her fingers, before pulling her hand away. “Come on, Pen, don’t be like that.” Her brows narrow as she stares up at me, a flash of mischief crossing her face. I open my mouth to tease her again, but before I get a chance, I feel her hand move lower so it’s now cupping my dick. She smirks up at me as she says, “You say that one more time and you won’t be getting anywhere near my coochie.” I burst out laughing as my mouth crashes against hers in a hard kiss. I feel her grip on me tighten a little as she gently but firmly pulls me on top of her. “Yes, I wanna do this,” she murmurs against my mouth, her hands pushing my sweats down over my hips as I kick them off my legs. I do the same with the boxers she’s wearing and before I can even question it again, both of us are naked, skin to skin, our hearts pounding in our chests as they are pressed together. I can feel the hard beat of hers mirroring mine as her fingers trail up my spine to the back of my neck. “You’re fucking gorgeous,” I whisper as I grab a condom from the side table and put it on, my body falling between her legs as I push inside her. “Oh my god,” she groans, her hips ri to meet mine as her legs wrap around me.

I kiss her again, harder this time as my hips start to move. “God, Pen, you feel so fucking good.” I swallow her moans with another kiss as we start to move, our bodies now a tangle of hot, sweaty limbs, skin pressed against skin, mouths crashing together, tongues entwined. It feels dangerous and heady and fueled by a crazy mix of alcohol and desire and lust that neither of us is bothering to fight anymore. I don’t give a shit how wrong this is or how much she might regret it tomorrow, because right now, everything about it feels so fucking right that I don’t ever want it to stop. “Tommy,” she cries, her nails digging into my back, her heels on my ass, urging me on, deeper, harder, faster. I give her what she wants, pushing her closer and closer until we are both falling over the edge, our groans loud in the silence of my room as I collapse on top of her, our bodies slick with sweat. “Holy shit,” she breathes out, making me laugh. “Seems like that’s like your favorite saying, Pen,” I tease. She pinches my side. “Your fault. I literally cannot form a cohesive thought right now.” I lift my head, our eyes meeting. “Clearly I rocked your coochie’s world,” I say with a wink. Penny shoves me off her with a grunt and I fall to the bed beside her, laughing, even as she slaps at my chest with her hands. “Honestly!” she cries. “One stupid comment and you’re never gonna let it go, are you?” I grab her wrist, pulling her so she lies on top of me. “Fuck no, would you?” Pen gives me a smirk. “Probably not,” she its with a shrug. “But I am gonna enjoy another spin in your awesome shower.” She hops off the bed, heading toward the ensuite bathroom I have attached to the master bedroom. I hear the gasp she lets out before the sound of running water

starts up. “Fucking hell, Tom, this is even better than the one in the other bathroom,” she shouts. Grinning, I push up off the bed and wander into the bathroom, following her into the shower. Penny turns to face me, her eyes widening as I push her back against the tiled wall. “What are you doing?” Lifting her arms, I pin her hands with one of mine on the wall above her head. Leaning closer, I suck on her bottom lip, gently biting it as I whisper, “ing you,” before I kiss her. I feel her arms pull against my grip, but I shake my head, pulling back a little as I kiss her neck and ear, whispering, “And your sweet little coochie,” before I sink to my knees in front of her.

I wake to the sun streaming in through the still open blinds, doing nothing for the headache I have courtesy of the wine we drank last night. After the shower, there had been another bottle, followed by another couple of rounds of sex in bed, the two of us eventually crashing in an exhausted sleep, our bodies wrapped around each other. It had been nothing short of fucking fantastic, whatever it was that was happening between us. I hadn’t been able to keep my hands off her and I’d stopped trying when it was clear she felt the same. But as I roll my head on the pillow to see Penny still sleeping beside me, her eyes closed, her hands under the pillow, everything feels strangely different in the sober light of day. Suddenly I am reminded of just how much younger than me Penny is, of what a mistake it was to sleep with a work colleague, a person I’m going to see every day and who may very well regret what happened between us last night. “Fuck,” I murmur, shoving a hand through my hair as I quietly roll out of bed. I grab my sweats from the floor, pulling them on as I walk out of the room and down to the kitchen. I get some coffee going as I reach for my phone to check the time, realizing at the same time that I didn’t once think about Wine Queen last night.

As I sip on my cup, I open up the app, expecting to see a message from her, asking about my day, maybe wondering where I am. But there’s nothing there and even though I enjoy our nightly chats, I can’t help but feel a little relieved. Even if I also feel a little guilty. “Morning.” My eyes snap up to see Penny walking into the kitchen, once again dressed in my t-shirt and boxers. Her hair hangs down around her shoulders, hiding her face and I watch as she looks anywhere but at me. “Morning,” I say. “Coffee?” Penny nods as she moves to one of the stools at the kitchen island and takes a seat. I pour her a cup, sliding it across the counter. “I don’t know how you take it.” “Black is good,” she murmurs, picking up the cup. She still hasn’t looked at me and the longer I stand here waiting for her to, the more I’m convinced she thinks last night was a mistake. A stupid drunken mistake that she now not only regrets but definitely doesn’t want to talk about or acknowledge. As the thought sinks in, a dull ache starts to form in the center of my chest as I wonder where the hell we’re supposed to go from here? It’s not like I actually thought we could or were starting a relationship. I mean she’s ten years younger than me for fuck’s sake, there’s not a chance in hell she wants to be tied down to a guy who’s already settled, who’s found his place in the world and isn’t interested in moving. Why would she want that with me? I finish off my coffee, leaving the cup in the sink as I move to the cabinet above the fridge. Pulling out the small first aid kit, I grab the Tylenol, putting it on the counter in front of her.

“I’m gonna take a shower before work,” I tell her. “You’re welcome to…” I want to say, me, but given she hasn’t looked at me since she walked in, I’m not sure that’s what she wants to hear. Instead, I add, “grab one too, then I’ll take you back to your car before work.” Penny nods as she takes another sip of coffee, her eyes closed. Exhaling, I rap my knuckles on the counter once before walking out of the kitchen and back to my bedroom. Stripping off my sweats, I take a hot shower, memories of everything that happened in here last night flashing through my brain every time I close my eyes. Unsurprisingly, Penny doesn’t me and by the time I’m dressed and walking back out to the kitchen, she’s standing by the counter, her dirty clothes from yesterday in her hands as she waits for me. “Ready to go?” She nods, her eyes briefly meeting mine. It’s quick, but it’s long enough that I catch a glimpse of the sorrow that’s there, punching me hard in the gut. Yeah, she regrets last night for sure. I grab my keys without saying another word, Penny following me back out to the truck. We drive to Somerville’s in silence, the car filled with a weird tension. I want to say something, anything to make her feel better, to let her know that even though she might, I don’t regret what we did. Even if it can’t go any further. I pull up beside her car, the day early enough that no one else is around. That’s probably a good thing given I’m clearly dropping Penny off, dressed in my clothes, her hair a tangled mess that just screams we had a shit load of sex last night. She opens the door, pausing as I say, “Pen.” She stops, looking over her shoulder at me, our eyes meeting. “You okay?” I ask. I watch as she pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, her gaze never leaving mine as she gives a slow nod. “Yeah,” she says, her voice husky and a little raw. “I gotta run home and—”

She doesn’t finish her sentence, instead climbing out of the truck. Just before she shuts the door, she turns back to me. “Thanks for, um…” She turns, her eyes gazing back in the direction we came from, to my house, which is just a tiny blip out on the horizon now. “You’re welcome,” I say quietly, wishing I could figure out what the fuck to say right now. But I don’t get a chance as Penny closes the door and climbs into her car. I wait until she’s driven off before I get out of the truck, slamming the door a little harder than necessary. Exhaling, I shove a rough hand through my hair as I head toward the main building, even knowing no one will be here yet. But as I walk inside, I run smack into Jack, his hand on my shoulder, steadying me. “Hey, how’s it going? You’re in early.” I grunt a response back, already moving past him because I’m not in the mood to talk to anyone right now. But Jack doesn’t let it go. “You okay? You look a little dusty.” I squint back at him, trying to decipher what the hell he means. Jack laughs. “Big night on the sauce, huh?” he asks. “Ohhh, you hang out with your online lady friend?” he adds, his eyes widening. I shake my head, cursing as I walk off, not bothering with a response. I hear Jack laughing, his teasing cries of, “Tommy, did you finally get laid last night?” echoing down the corridor for anyone to hear. “Fucking hell,” I mutter to myself, as I pull my phone from my pocket and open up the matchmaker app. Because despite Jack’s teasing, this is the woman I should be focusing my attention on. Not my much younger co-worker, a girl who has rapidly become a friend and who I’m not just insanely attracted to, but who was also quite possibly the best sex I’ve ever had. No, I need to focus on someone more suited to me. Someone who’s actually

available and wants the same things I do.

Me: hey, how are you? Sorry I was MIA last night, work thing. How was your night?

Chapter Nineteen

Penny

What in the actual fuck was I thinking last night? Sleeping with Tommy, not once, not twice, but three fucking times and then in the sober morning light whatever was between us the night before felt like it was now long gone. What it was between us was several bottles of wine and if we’re being honest here, a little bit of wanting the good old-fashioned big O. And holy shit did he deliver on that. I won’t ever apologize for wanting to sleep with him in that moment. It was exactly where I was supposed to be and there will be no regrets. What I’m not a fan of is the way I handled it this morning, because I actually like him. The last thing I want is to ruin the blossoming friendship we have going, but I’m pretty sure that’s shot to shit by the way he dropped me off earlier. I’m sure he looks at me as some young drifter without a fucking care in the world, moving from guy to guy just for the hell of it. And yes, I’ve slept around, but that doesn’t mean I don’t know what I want. I know exactly what I want, and sometimes it is just a mind-blowing orgasm. But in this case, it feels like I want more, more than to just be seen as some girl who sleeps around. Maybe Tommy Andrews isn’t meant to just be a one-night stand. As soon as I get home, I take a few aspirin and climb in the shower. I still feel crappy, my head is throbbing, but my clarity over the situation seems to be getting clearer. Even in the twenty-first century there’s this double standard that guys are allowed to send unsolicited dick pics, but when a woman its to enjoying a one-night stand or even to enjoying sex, there’s a collective gasp of horror from the world. I really hoped Tommy wasn’t that type of guy, but I may have misread the whole situation and I’m not going to let him think he gets the final say in any of this. With my thoughts still front and center in my mind, I dress quickly and grab the cup of coffee I made before getting in the shower. Even though I’m not working

today, I’ll be heading over to Somerville’s because the way things ended are not how I want them. He doesn’t get to win and there won’t be this weird awkwardness between us now.

I pull into the parking lot and immediately head back toward the sheds, not certain if Tommy will be there or not, but it’s a good guess. I find a few of the new guys working on one of the machines and I call out to them, “Hey, any of you seen Tommy?” I stop in the entryway to the shed, my hands on my hips and I’m certain a resting bitch face that could stop anyone in their tracks. “I think he’s out in the orchard,” Dylan calls back as he stops working and looks over at me. I immediately turn and begin to walk in that direction when I hear Dylan make some snide comment followed by an incredibly immature catcalling sound as if he knows I slept with Tommy last night. “Grow up! You’re like a giant man-child!” I yell, not giving him a chance to respond, but it’s obvious Tommy’s been gossiping about his evening and tossing me into a pile of conquests. And to think I thought he might be different and that I was actually falling for him. Lauren and Ellen always talk about how he’s this great guy who gets shit on by women, but fuck that. He’s really put on a good act all these years. He’s no different than all the other guys I’ve hooked up with. One-night stand or not, keep your fucking mouth shut. I’m even more fired up than I was just a few minutes ago and when I find him on a ladder in the orchard, it takes everything in me not to want to sweep the legs out from under it and watch him hit the ground. “Listen!” I call out and he startles, almost falling off the ladder and for a second I feel guilty, but that halts when I see the shocked look on his face as I walk up to him. Did he really think he’d never see me again? We fucking work together, which is exactly why I’m here. He doesn’t get to make my work environment awkward because now he’s embarrassed that he slept with me. I can make my life

awkward as fuck all on my own. “Penny,” he says, climbing down the ladder and I hate the way my name sounds on his lips. It holds sympathy and comfort and something about it makes me want to tell him I was falling for him, but I cut it off. I’m not going down that road and if he really has feelings for me, he can be a fucking man and say it. “I want you to know that I didn’t sleep with you because of daddy issues or because my life is out of control. I did it because I fucking wanted to, and you don’t get to make me feel guilty. It was sex between two consenting adults—” “Pen—” “Nope, don’t interrupt me. You had your chance at your house this morning and you crept around the topic like a coward.” I stop, sucking in a breath, but not long enough for him to interject. “If you have any respect for me as a woman, which everyone here claims you’re all about respecting women, you don’t get to discriminate and act like you’re fucking awesome for getting a girl ten years younger than you to give up the goods.” I pause again, not because I want him to speak, like I said, he had his chance and I’m just disappointed in myself for letting him control what happened this morning. “And since we’re on the topic, what the hell does that even mean? Giving up the goods?” “I don’t know,” Tommy answers, his eyes wide as he shakes his head. His answer is almost an automatic response to my rant. “It makes it sound like I’m smuggling cocaine in my vagina and you’re trying to get it out of me. That’s far too ive and I’m anything but compliant. My vagina does what it wants and who it wants, whenever it wants.” I stomp my foot, holding my head high, I turn on my heel and begin to walk away from him. I have no idea what I hope to accomplish, but I certainly feel better and he still hasn’t bothered to try to redeem himself. I whip back around, “And stop talking about me to those assholes in the shed. My consensual one-night stand is none of their fucking business.” I flip my

brown hair over my shoulder and begin to storm away once again. But I’m back a few seconds later when I the bees. “And I’m still tending to the bees so don’t go thinking you’ll get to avoid me.” “Penny, seriously, wait up!” he yells, jogging to catch up with me, but I keep walking. “I didn’t say anything to the guys, I swear. I didn’t say anything to anyone.” I stop, turning back to look at him. He’s about twenty feet away and he looks as perfect as he did last night in his house. He has the most striking caramelcolored eyes and right now they’re watching me with a burning intensity I can’t manage to read. His dark brown hair tousles in the warm breeze and he looks like he belongs tangled among the branches of the apple trees that surround us. He looks like perfection, not a concept or an idea, not a word or a thought of it, but actual living, breathing perfection. I hate him for being so much of what I want and not wanting me back. It’s the story of my life. “Okay,” I respond, but I know I need to walk away because letting myself remain this close to him is a mistake. He needs to be dropped into the one-night stand category fast. But we stand suspended in silence, the leaves of the trees rustling around us, the words between us falling silent and everything else keeps moving as if it has no idea. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs, quiet droplets let loose into the air, but I have no indication as to what he’s apologizing for. I’ve heard these words so many times from so many men and never once was the actual intention there. It was a mindless apology meant to placate me back into my place and I hate to it that in the past it worked. “I’m not sorry,” I reply. “I’m not sorry for sleeping with you or making you feel uncomfortable or for anything I’ve said. It’s obvious what ed between us was nothing more than a fleeting moment.” He isn’t expressive and not that he needs to be or that I should expect him to be

either. He’s aloof and quiet and diplomatic, and this is the way he’s been since I met him, something I always mistook for petulance. “Tommy!” a voice calls out. “Man, you back here?” Dylan rounds the corner coming down the aisle and stops a few feet short of us. “Am I interrupting something?” he asks, a stupid smirk on his face and insinuation dripping from his voice. “No,” we respond in unison. “Good,” he replies, smiling at me coyly as he sidles up next me. He’s the epitome of a smooth talker and he has the body to match. “So, what you up to later, Penny?” “Working, I’m sure,” Tommy interrupts, answering for me. “Working here at Somerville’s your place of employment. Did you need something, Dylan? You came looking for me, not Penny.” “Yeah, but she was a happy surprise,” he jokes and nothing about it has Tommy laughing, which has me feeling a little bit better about everything. I may detect a hint of jealousy in Tommy’s response. “I’m just leaving. I work tomorrow. Maybe I’ll see you around,” I tell him, walking off back toward the entrance. I don’t want to ever be that girl that forces herself onto a guy, but there was something between us and there still is. I have no idea why he’s holding back. The age gap? The flightiness of my life? Fear of commitment? I don’t know, but I’m not going to sit around and wait for him to get his shit together and if anyone understands that a one-night stand doesn’t equate to a relationship, it’s me. He can make things awkward all he wants, but I’m not going anywhere. I’m not giving up my job at Somerville’s because he can’t move on. I pull my phone from my purse and find a notification from Mystery Matchmaker. I have a message from C. Grizwold and I scrunch my eyes shut tight and clench my teeth. I had totally blown him off last night after weeks of chatting, so I could randomly sleep with my co-worker.

C.Grizwold: hey, how are you? Sorry I was MIA last night, work thing. How was your night?

Me: No worries. Was pretty busy too. Got anything going on tonight?

A few minutes with no response and while I get that it’s only been one night that has ed since we last chatted, I feel horribly guilty. He isn’t my boyfriend and neither is Tommy, but something about it feels like I’m trying to keep someone waiting in the wings just in case. It’s shitty and I know it.

C.Grizwold: Yeah, let’s chat tonight. Sorry, I’m at work, gotta run.

This is where my efforts should be focused and that’s what I’m going to do. I can’t be bouncing back and forth between people and waiting for one of them to make the right move. I’m putting all my eggs into this basket and if they crack, so be it.

Me: Sounds good. Message me when you’re free. I’m off work today.

Attempting to push my thoughts of Tommy to the side, because he was seriously some great sex, but I need to that’s all it was. I’m all in when it comes to relationships, so I need to stop making myself feel guilty. I would never go sleeping around in a committed relationship and what happened between Tommy and me has nothing to do with my chatting with C. Grizwold. Should either of them ever decide to take the next step, then that’s a different story. This whole shift has me thinking I should probably meet up with C. Grizwold and see if we’re really as compatible as it seems online. But even better, see if

that chemistry that sparks hot and steamy can be moved off the pages of the internet into our real lives.

Chapter Twenty

Tommy

I feel like a total fucking moron right now. Worse than that actually, and even though Penny has got it all wrong, I still can’t manage to string a semi-coherent sentence together and actually explain it to her. No, I’m not sorry I slept with her, not even fucking close. That’s not what I meant when I apologized to her. But instead of actually explaining it like a normal person, I said nothing. Absolutely fucking nothing. God, I am an idiot. And no, of course I didn’t tell anyone it happened. Especially not that little shit, Dylan who so clearly wants to get in her pants himself. Like I’d ever fucking say anything to him. But for some reason, one that’s either related to my hangover or the fact that sleeping with Penny has permanently fried my brain, I can’t open my mouth and say all of this to her, especially in a way that makes any sense. Instead, all I’d managed was some half-assed mumbled apology, which she totally misunderstood and then we’d been interrupted. Which given her last words to me, is maybe for the best. It’s obvious what ed between us was nothing more than a fleeting moment. Is that what she seriously thinks? That it was nothing more than a fleeting moment, a fucking itch to scratch? Jesus, what a fucking mess I’ve made. My phone chimes out with a message and when I take a look, I see it’s from Wine Queen, asking what I’m up to tonight. To be honest, I wish I was doing the same thing I was doing last night, but I know that’s not gonna happen. Not after I’ve just gone and completely fucked it up.

I type out a quick response.

Me: Yeah, let’s chat tonight. Sorry, I’m at work, gotta run.

It’s shitty and sort of cold, but I can’t help it. I’m pissed off and annoyed and the only thing I care about right now is how much I might have screwed things up. I switch over to my text messages, ignoring the message Wine Queen sends back in response. Even though I know she’s who I should be focusing my attention on, she’s not who’s on my mind right now. And as much as I know there is no future for Penny and me, I still can’t leave things the way they are between us. It’s not just that I don’t want her thinking the wrong thing about me or what happened between us, but we work together and we’re going to see each other every day, so we need to get along.

Me: Pen, I wasn’t apologizing for what happened, ok? I’m not sorry it happened either and I should have explained that better. I also didn’t tell anyone . I wouldn’t do that. Not because I’m sorry, but because it’s no one’s fucking business.

I pause, unsure what else I should say. I try to all the things she shouted at me just minutes ago, something about her vagina and giving up the goods, but to be honest, my brain can’t put it all together. She’d looked so damn sexy standing there yelling at me and even though I know I should’ve been listening, should’ve been responding to what she was saying. Hell, I should’ve pulled her into my arms and kissed her, but I didn’t do a damn thing. I stood there like a mute, my actions probably only serving to convince her that she should be regretting sleeping with me.

“Fuck’s sake,” I mutter to myself as I slip my phone back into my pocket. When I turn back to the ladder, I see Jack walking toward me, a huge grin on his face. “Shit,” I murmur, looking around quickly as I seriously contemplate just walking away so I don’t have to deal with his shit too. “Tommy!” Jack shouts and I know I’ve missed my opportunity. “Hold up a sec, will you?” I let out an exhale, forcing myself to stay calm even though I’m positive Jack’s gonna be on my ass like he was this morning. “Jack,” I say, my tone strangely formal. “What can I do for you?” He gives me a weird look as though he’s confused by my question or the way I’m talking to him. “Ahh, you can start by not being such a weirdo,” he says, hands on his hips. “What the fuck’s going on with you today?” “Nothing.” He narrows his eyes at me. “Bullshit,” he says. “First you’re all wound up over something when I run into you this morning. I mean you’re giving off this whole I got laid vibe, but you’re even more pissed off than usual. So, I’m guessing it was either shit sex, which is still sex, so…” he pauses, shrugging his shoulders as if to say so what before he continues. “Or, it was great sex but the morning after was a disaster and you didn’t get a repeat performance. Now, which one is it?” I blink once, my brain trying to process the words he’s just said as he stands there, hands on his hips and an expectant look on his face. “Tommy?” he prompts. “What?” Jack rolls his eyes. “Jesus christ, you’re a mess, man, a mess!” I shake my head, shoving a hand through my hair. “I’m fine,” I lie. “Now, did you want something, ‘cause I’ve got stuff to do.” I’m being an asshole and I know it, but I can’t seem to stop myself.

“Yeah,” Jack says, giving me a sideways glance that tells me he’s not happy. “I did want something.” “And?” I say rolling my hand at him as if to say hurry the fuck up. “And,” he says, exaggerating the word, “we need to run the guys through the bottling process, so they are ready to go when the next batch of cider is ready. You good to help me out with that?” I take a long deep breath in, knowing that any semblance of peace today has now been shot to shit by Jack’s request. Not only am I going to have to spend the day with the new guys, teaching them stuff, I’m also going to have to listen to the shit they’re constantly talking about, which seems never ending. “Sure,” I eventually say. “Just give me a sec to finish up here and I’ll be right in.”

The day es slowly and by the time I’m heading home, I’m exhausted and grumpy. The empty wine bottles from the night before are still sitting on the kitchen counter, taunting me almost with what happened last night and what I know can’t happen again. Gathering them up, I take them out for recycling before heading inside to take a long hot shower. Afterward, I grab a beer from the fridge and head out to the back porch with my phone. As I sit down though, I realize I never sent the text message to Penny, which means she probably thinks I’m even more of a dick for my continued radio silence toward her. “Oh man,” I exhale to myself, taking a long swig of beer before opening up the message I was composing. I quickly read over what I’d typed, before adding to it.

Me: Pen, I wasn’t apologizing for what happened ok. I’m not sorry it happened either and I should have explained that better. I also didn’t tell anyone .

I wouldn’t do that. Not because I’m sorry, but because it’s no one’s fucking business. I really value our friendship and I don’t want to lose that. I know we work together and I don’t want shit to be awkward, so can we still be friends… try and get past this?

It’s still a lame ass apology and not even close to what I really want to say, but given the situation, it’s the best I can come up with. Because as much as I really like Pen and would definitely be up for exploring where things could go with her, I know I can’t. For so many reasons. We work together. She’s so much younger than me. There’s not a chance in hell she wants the same things in life as I do, namely to stay here, settle down, maybe have some kids. And I can’t ask or expect that from her. More than that, I’m not willing to risk it, only to have it all go to shit again like it did with Caitlyn. Exhaling, I hit send on the text before switching over to the Mystery Matchmaker app.

Me: hey, you around? Feel like chatting?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: hey yeah, for sure. How are you?

Me: okay…you?

My comments feel distant and weird and I know that’s because I’m distracted by the fact that Penny hasn’t responded to my text message, even though I can see

she’s read it. I’m not sure what I expect her to say, but maybe something to say our friendship is important to her too would be nice.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: all good…what are you up to tonight?

Me: nothing much. Wanna play a game?

It’s a strange request given we are communicating via an online app with absolutely no idea about who we really are, but whatever. If I’m serious about seeing if this connection I share with Wine Queen is real, I know I have to try. I have to push thoughts of Pen from my mind and focus on the person on the other end of this phone.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: a game? What sort of game?

Me: truth or dare

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: LOL…the dares could be interesting given we have no idea who the other person is, but sure, I’m game.

The dare is exactly what I’m going for, but she doesn’t need to know that just yet.

Me: okay, truth or dare?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: truth

Me: chicken ;) but ok…have you ever had a one-night stand?

I have no idea why the fuck that is the first question I ask, but obviously my actions from last night are still swirling inside my head, fucking with me.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: of course, have you?

Me: yep

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: was it good, bad or ugly…wanna share details or…?

I let out a long exhale, my eyes closing briefly as I think back to last night and all the very explicit details of what went down between me and Pen. I’m not sure I’d use good, bad or ugly to describe any of it, even after the way things had played out this morning.

Me: None of the above…it was spectacular.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: spectacular huh…must have sucked to have it only be one night.

Me: you have no idea.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: okay, my turn…truth or dare?

I pause, contemplating whether I should say dare, what she’d say to me if I did.

Me: truth.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: and you called me chicken Ok…where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Wow, it really feels like the universe is conspiring to remind me that my little trip down sex-filled fantasy lane with Penny is just that, a fantasy.

Me: in 5 years…I dunno, work going well, a wife, maybe a kid or one on the way…what about you?

It’s not strictly how truth or dare is played, turning the truth back on the person who asked it in the first place, but considering Wine Queen did it to me, I figure I can do the same to her. The bubbles pop up and disappear for what feels like forever. As I sit watching the screen, sipping on my beer, my mind turns over all the possibilities she could be typing. Possibilities that could end this potential relationship right now if what I see in five years is different to what she sees in

five years. Unable to watch as the bubbles continue, I put my phone on the table and get up to go and grab a second beer. When I come back outside, I take a seat and lift up the phone.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: in 5 years huh…an interesting question and if you’d asked me 5 years ago if this is where I’d see myself now, I’d have said hell no. But now I’m here, I know this is exactly where I’m supposed to be…where I WANT to be. And in 5 years from now, I hope I’m still here…working a job I love, in a town I love and living with someone I love…maybe thinking about the whole kid thing too…which is something I want…in 5-8 years ;)

I let out a hard breath that I didn’t even realize I was holding as a stupid grin breaks out on my face at her answer. I hadn’t realized until just now, how important this kind of shit was, how Caitlyn and I not discussing this kind of stuff before we got together was a huge mistake, and one that ultimately killed our relationship. And even though this is not the norm, not how I ever thought I would be starting a relationship with someone, something about it feels right.

Me: good answer okay, my turn…truth or dare?

Chapter Twenty-One

Penny

I don’t even hesitate in responding, enjoying this game and getting to know C. Grizwold better. Something about it feels young and childish, but it makes me feel alive. There are so many mediocre things in life and once we grow up, we lose sight of the things that once brought us joy. We dive into all the seriousness, almost forgetting the small pleasures.

Me: Truth

C.Grizwold: Do you have any tattoos?

Me: Yep. I have a few. Most of them were gotten when I was younger, but I don’t regret them. No tramp stamp or anything like that though. ;)

C.Grizwold: So you’re not one of those butterfly-above-your-ass-crack girls?

Me: Nope never jumped on that bandwagon. I’ve always kinda been a do-myown-thing girl. Now it’s your turn, truth or dare?

C.Grizwold: Truth

Me: Do you have any tattoos?

C.Grizwold: You can’t be serious. This isn’t going to be all that exciting if you just ask me the same questions I ask you.

Me: Fine! If you could sleep with one celebrity who would it be?

C.Grizwold: Easy. Kate Beckinsale.

No one could compete with that, and if I’m being honest, I’d sleep with her too. While I’m no Kate Beckinsale, I think I’m a good catch. I didn’t ask the question so I could be all self-conscious and worry about what he’ll think of my body should we ever meet. I asked it because I was genuinely curious, and it may speak a little more about the type of girl he’s looking for.

Me: I ship it.

C.Grizwold: You what??

It’s hard not to laugh out loud at his comment. He must be older than me or isn’t aware of what that even means.

Me: LOL. It means that I think you would be good together. She’s hot.

C.Grizwold: So would you ship us?

Me: Totally.

C.Grizwold: That’s lit. Isn’t that what all the kids are saying these days?

Now I’m literally laughing out loud. Tears are streaming down my cheeks, streaking my makeup as I drag my shirtsleeve across my face. It feels amazing to laugh like this, deep and hearty, taking in long breaths and not bothering to try to control it.

Me: You have me absolutely dying with laughter. How old are you?

C.Grizwold: 34 How old are you?

Me: 23

There’s a sudden long lag between him messaging me back and I really hope he isn’t one of those guys who has now decided I’m too young and probably too immature, or even worse, I don’t want him thinking I’m looking for some sugar daddy. Now don’t get me wrong, it would be a pretty sweet gig to have some rich guy paying for everything, but I don’t like enough people to tolerate someone for their money. And I’m far too independent, which is probably the reason I jump from loser to loser. Relationships shouldn’t be work and when they are, I tend to jump ship. I choose the losers because I know it won’t work and they’re easier to get rid of.

Me: Don’t tell me you’re hung up on the age thing.

C.Grizwold: I’d be lying if I said it didn’t catch me off guard.

Me: I’m not going to tell you I’m super mature or try to convince you to stick around. I’m immature as hell. I love to laugh and have a good time. I drink too much on occasion and I have a job that most people would say is temporary, but I don’t give a fuck. If you can’t handle that, then that’s okay. I’m not for everyone. Sometimes I’m not even my own flavor.

C.Grizwold: I thought we were playing truth or dare and you went off the rails.

Me: We are, but I thought you were being weird.

C.Grizwold: Ask me the question, then. And I’m not being weird. You’re being weird. ;)

Me: Truth or dare?

C.Grizwold: Dare

I’m smirking far too wide for my own good. We’ve spent the better part of the evening not taking the risk, skimming the surface and keeping things simple

with all these truth questions. Now here it is, the first one, and what I have running through my head can go one of two ways. Here goes nothing.

Me: Ask me out on a real date. One where we actually meet in person.

There is no delay in him responding. The bubbles pop up immediately and his response is exactly what I hoped for. If the age thing didn’t scare him off, then this is really happening.

C.Grizwold: Wine Queen, would you like to have dinner with me?

Me: Yes

We finish out the conversation with the details and my heart slamming around in my chest. His first suggestion was to meet at Nona’s Italian Palace and I nearly spit the wine I was drinking out like a TV sitcom character. Without giving away too much information, because let’s be real, I don’t want him knowing where I live just yet. That whole Catfish thing is running through my head still. “I tried to tell her he wasn’t thirty-four, but probably more like eighty-four,” Lauren would be saying into the camera with her signature eye roll. “How’d you miss all the signs?” Nev would mock, sick of the stupidity of people. There aren’t any signs, because trust me I’ve looked, long and hard. I get that it’s the Internet and people can be sketchy as fuck, so I’m keeping a few things to myself still, where I live being one of them. Also, if the date goes awry, I’ll be sneaking out the bathroom window like any

self-respecting woman and telling the guy I live above Nona’s would be a huge mistake. Although it would be nice to be that close to home. Damn it! I should’ve told him we could meet at Nona’s and then I wouldn’t be hoofing it home in heels if I have to run. We ended up settling on a steakhouse with a beautiful outdoor patio after talking about how much we both love the outdoors and would prefer it over sitting inside a stuffy, loud restaurant. I climb into bed with my phone already opened to the calendar app and I add the date and time. Two days from now.

The next day I head into work, counting down the days with a nervous excitement. It’s all finally going to happen and it was all started based on a comment from Jack, a silly, almost joke of a comment. I’m checking on the bees when Tommy walks up, stopping a few feet short almost like he’s surprised to see me here. I never responded to his text and now I feel a little bad about it, but it still didn’t really explain why his behavior was so different the next day. He itted to not regretting sleeping with me, but he never went beyond that and that’s all I need to know that he’s not interested in anything more. And that’s totally fine, because I’m labeling myself as off the market until my date with C. Grizwold. “Stop being weird!” I yell, turning my back on him as I pull the lid off the super, a few bees coming out casually. “Why don’t they ever sting you?” he asks, pretending to be bothered by the way the bees respond to me versus the way they respond to him. “You need to start bathing. I think they like the smell of your sweat or they just find you a threat. You are pretty crabby and hard to read.” Our eyes meet just as I say the last part and the hum of the bees vibrates through

me or is it the tension that’s still electrified below the surface. His sharp angular jaw tenses with my words, clenching hard and he runs a hand through his brown curls, pushing them to the side and out of his eyes. He regards me with a quiet reverence that makes me feel less defensive and more curious. “Listen, Pen,” he starts, blowing out a hard breath of air. “It isn’t you—” My laugh cuts him off instantly, slipping out before I can control it and it’s completely warranted. He isn’t seriously going to use that old ass line on me. I hold up a hand, still laughing as I try to get myself together. “Don’t,” I say, barely getting the word out through my laughter. “Sorry, I have no fucking clue what to say. I don’t want to be a jerk,” he its, sheepishly looking down at the ground. “Then don’t.” “I have no idea if I can be in a relationship. I’m not very good at them and I think you deserve more than this,” he says, motioning around the vineyard. “You deserve someone who isn’t...” He stops, looking himself over as he shrugs. “Someone who doesn’t permanently live at a vineyard and who doesn’t come home smelling like rotten grapes and whose hands aren’t always dirty.” “You sell yourself short, you know that, right? There may be women out there who hate all those things, you may have even dated them, but I hear you and it’s all good.” He doesn’t respond right away, and I wish I could read his mind, because what he’s articulating isn’t everything he’s thinking and feeling. He’s never been an open book, if anything he’s far more private and reserved than anyone I’ve ever met. I honestly don’t believe it’s me in this situation, but it is more him. Something is holding him back from letting go and finding what he wants in me. “I’ve been looking at mead recipes,” he now says, changing the subject quickly and when he makes eye with me, everything on his face screams for me to not acknowledge the awkwardness of the shift. “Oh really? I have too. Do you want to give it a go on Saturday morning? I’m

off.” I ask, almost forgetting about my date on Friday night. But it’s just that: a date, nothing more. It could be a complete disaster and then I’ll at least have the comfort of Somerville’s, the bees and making mead with Tommy to remind me that my life here is pretty great. “Yeah, sure. I’ll take the day off and we can figure out what the hell we’re doing,” Tommy responds, and it feels good to move beyond the awkwardness that blanketed our earlier conversation. “Did you move the honey from the shed?” I now ask, realizing we never really found a storage place for it. We canned about a dozen jars of raw honey in preparation for making mead and all I hope now is that we did it right. “I moved it up to my house. I was worried it would spoil or crystalize with how warm the sheds can get.” He mentions his house and suddenly the weirdness returns. It’s like now his house is this reminder of all the naughty things we did together and mentioning it makes it all flash through his head. Better burn the fucker to the ground or better yet, let me have it because I couldn’t give a shit what happened in it. I’d live there even if someone told me it housed a dead body for a month. Light a candle and get over it. “You know it’s okay for you to talk about where you live. I want you to know I don’t associate your house with our trashy one-night stand. All I picture is your epic fucking shower and to die for view.” “Good to know I was that memorable,” he mutters, and I can’t tell if he’s being his usual snarky self or if he’s truly insulted. “Don’t take it personally, your shower wins out over everyone I’ve ever slept with.”

Chapter Twenty-Two

Tommy

Penny wanders off after our weird ass conversation and I watch her, unable to look away. I don’t even know what that was just then, what the fuck I was even trying to say. “God, you’re an idiot,” I mumble to myself, as I turn back to the hives, the quiet hum of the bees filling the air. A couple of them fly out and buzz toward me and I can’t help but lift my arm, sniffing as I wonder if Penny’s right and they do like the way I smell. Or maybe I just need a fucking shower, I think to myself as I turn and head back toward Somerville’s. I head into the main building, walking back toward Lauren’s office to clear it with her about me not working this weekend. I know she’ll be cool with it. She’s always telling me I work too much anyway, but I do want to give her a heads up. “Lauren?” I call as I step into her office. “Oh shit, sorry,” I blurt out as soon as I walk in. Jack laughs, wrapping his arms around Lauren, who’s sitting on his lap, as he says, “No worries, mate, nothing inappropriate going on in here…yet, anyway.” Lauren swats at his arm as she reaches for a cookie from the half empty packet on her desk. “Hey, Tommy,” she says, smiling. “Hey,” I reply, walking over and reaching for a cookie. Lauren smacks my hand away before I have a chance to grab one, immediately letting out a gasp as she realizes what she’s done. “Shit, sorry,” she says. I glance at Jack, who’s still laughing. “She’s kinda territorial about them,” he says, tipping his head in the direction of the packet. “Am not!” Lauren says, scowling up at him.

“Babe, please, you haven’t even let me have one.” “Yes, I have.” Jack leans down and kisses the end of her nose. “No, you haven’t.” Lauren’s brow narrows as though she’s actually trying to decide if what he’s saying is true. Eventually she exhales, reluctantly reaching for the packet before offering it to Jack. He grins as he takes one of the chocolate cookies before tipping his head in my direction. Lauren’s face falls as she turns to me and holds the packet out. “You sure?” I ask, grinning at the look on her face. “Yes, she’s sure,” Jack says before he sticks the whole cookie in his mouth. Lauren elbows him in the stomach as I reach for one, her eyes never leaving the cookie as she tracks it to my mouth and I start to eat it. “Holy shit,” I say. “These are amazing.” “Right?” Lauren replies. Jack lets out another laugh. “Babe, seriously, we have like fifty packs of Tim Tams at home and Dad has already sent another carton over. It’s okay to share them.” I chuckle as Lauren pouts up at him, clearly annoyed at his suggestion. “Well, thanks for letting me have one of your precious cookies,” I say. “And if it’s okay with you, I’m gonna skip out on work this weekend, that cool?” Jack raises a brow. “Got something going on, Tommy?” “Yeah, just making some mead.” He grins. “With Penny?” “With Penny,” I reply with a nod. Jack smirks up at me now, and I can tell he wants to say something more about the whole Penny and me working together thing. Before he gets a chance

though, Lauren cuts in. “Absolutely, you know you don’t have to work weekends anyway, Tommy. When do you think the mead will be ready? We can add it to the tasting menu if you like?” I glance at her. “Let’s see if it’s actually drinkable first.” “Of course it will be,” she says. “You’ve been helping us make wine and cider for years, it’ll be great, right, Jack?” she asks as she elbows him in the stomach again. “Yeah, yeah,” he says. “Although I think the bigger question here is, what’s the deal with you and Penny?” “The deal?” I ask, clearing my throat a little. Surely they don’t know about what happened between us? “There is no deal. We’re friends, we work together.” “Sure,” Jack replies, dragging the word out. I roll my eyes, needing to get the fuck out of here before he starts digging deeper. Reaching over, I grab another cookie from the packet on Lauren’s desk, chuckling as she scowls up at me again. “Anyway, I’m outta here. Thanks for the cookies.”

The rest of the week es quickly and before I know it, I’m heading home early on Friday afternoon to get ready for my date with Wine Queen. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous about meeting up with her. I mean yeah, we have great chemistry online and it’s clear we have a lot in common, despite the age difference. But that doesn’t mean it’ll translate to real life. Everything’s always different behind the safety of a screen, especially with an anonymous profile. Before, when neither of us knew if we’d ever meet up in person, it meant we could say anything that came to mind. It was liberating and easy and as I pull on a clean shirt, I also realize, kind of dirty at times too. I mean shit, we actually got off to thoughts of each other. At one point we talked about swapping naked pics. Is she going to that part when she meets me? Hell, is she going to be embarrassed about it?

I’m not, but I have no idea how she’ll react. Knowing it’s too late to back out now, I grab my keys and wallet before heading out to my truck. It’s a thirty-minute drive into Napa and I spend the time going over everything I know about Wine Queen in my head. Comes from Massachusetts. Has a couple of tattoos. Wants kids eventually. Loves living in Napa. Is twenty-three years old. I let out an exhale at that last one, knowing that up until she revealed that detail, I’d thought she was pretty fucking perfect. Which is not to say that her age is an issue, but I am well aware of the irony that I won’t date Penny partly because of her age, yet here I am meeting up with this woman, regardless of her age. When I reach the restaurant, I park out on the street and head inside. I’m early and when the hostess greets me, I tell her I’ll wait at the bar. I take a seat and order a beer, needing something to calm my nerves while I wait. It’s been a long fucking time since I went out on a date and I can’t help but wonder if I even how to. God, I hope no one I know is at the restaurant. The last thing I need is any witnesses to this. “Thanks,” I reply, when the bartender slides the bottle in front of me. I lift it, taking a long sip of the cold liquid. “Can I grab a Sam Adams, please?” I turn at the familiar voice, a sinking feeling in my gut. “Penny?” She turns to me, a surprised look on her face as she glances over my shoulder and then back to me. “Tommy, hey, what are…um what are you doing here?” I take another sip of beer. “I’m meeting someone,” I cough out. “You?” “Same,” she replies, before thanking the bartender for her drink. She takes a seat beside me and we both face the bar, sipping on our beers as a weird awkwardness falls around us. Of all the fucking people who had to come in here tonight, Penny is the absolute last person I needed it to be.

How the fuck am I supposed to be on a date with Wine Queen, when the woman I have a totally inappropriate and unrequited crush on is in the same restaurant. Probably on her own date, for fuck’s sake. I glance at my watch, noting Wine Queen is now five minutes late. Fuck me, if she stands me up, that will be even worse. I may as well tattoo the words, giant fucking loser, across my forehead now. I pull my phone from my pocket to check for any messages from her. There’s nothing there, so for something to do, I type out a quick one of my own.

Me: hey, am here at the bar. Lmk when you get here.

As soon as I hit send, the all too familiar ping of an incoming message sounds out to my right. Turning, I watch as Penny pulls her phone from her purse, her eyes on the screen. She reads whatever is on there before glancing sideways at me, a strange look on her face. I swallow hard, my body suddenly tense as my mind plays catch up and starts to process what the fuck is going on right now. Penny turns back to her phone, typing something. As soon as she’s done, my phone pings with a new message and when I glance at the screen, I’m hit with a sucker punch, right to the gut.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: I’m at the bar too…you’re sitting right beside me, aren’t you?

My heart pounds in my chest as I stare down at my phone. Everything feels like it’s moving in slow motion, my brain now filled with an endless stream of messages that Wine Queen and I have shared over the past few weeks.

But before I even have a chance to question any of it, flashbacks of the night Penny and I shared together appear, reminding me that it doesn’t matter what Wine Queen and I have said to each other via online messages, not when we’ve already gotten up close and very fucking personal with each other in real life. “Wine Queen?” I eventually ask, turning to Penny. “Clark?” I nod, letting out a hard breath as I shove a hand through my hair. “Shit,” I blurt out. Penny laughs, her bottom lip between her teeth. “Um yeah,” she says. “Fuck, I can’t believe I’ve been talking to you this whole time.” I shrug, figuring this is probably the end of us talking now that she knows who I am. “Yeah,” I mumble. “I mean, shit,” Penny continues, still smiling. “You’re like, so funny and cheeky and…” “And what?” I ask, finishing my beer, wondering what else she was going to say. She lets out a giggle. “I don’t know, nice.” I narrow my brows at her. “Why are you so surprised by this?” I ask. “I can be nice.” Penny’s eyes widen as she gives me a smirk. “Oh really?” she says sarcastically. I wave a hand in her direction. “You’re the one that called our one-night stand trashy,” I remind her. Penny’s cheeks flush. “I didn’t mean it like that,” she says. “I just meant like…I don’t know, it was kinda clichéd, us getting hammered and hooking up like that.” “Right, clichéd,” I mumble. “Oh, you’re both here,” the hostess suddenly says, interrupting our awkward ass

conversation. “Would you like to be shown to your table?” I glance up at Penny, expecting her to say no. Instead, she turns to the hostess with a smile and says, “Absolutely.” The hostess beams at both of us before indicating the way. Penny winks at me as she leans in and whispers, “Come on, Clark, I dare you to have dinner with me,” before turning and following the hostess toward the outdoor balcony. Taking a deep breath, I slide off my stool and follow them both, having no fucking clue as to what’s happening right now. Never in my wildest dreams would I have guessed that Wine Queen would be Penny, although looking back on it now, maybe it really was that fucking obvious. I mean she calls herself Wine Queen and Penny works at a fucking winery. She said she has several tattoos, which I now know, courtesy of that night we spent together, Penny definitely has. She mentioned she lived in Napa and loved living here, and of course she told me how old she was. Thinking about it now, it’s all too fucking obvious that Wine Queen was Penny. God, how could I have been so stupid? “Thank you,” Penny says, as she takes the menu offered to her. “Can I grab another beer?” I ask, knowing I’m going to need it. “Me too.” After the hostess leaves, we sit in silence, both of us staring at our menus as an awkward quietness descends over the table. I’m not even sure what we’re doing or if this is even a date anymore. God knows I’ve completely fucked up any chance of anything with Penny after the way I handled our night together. So why is she still sitting here with me? “So,” she says, lowering her menu as she folds her arms on the table in front of her. She smiles across at me and I’m hit with just how fucking beautiful she is. Her long hair is down, hanging around her shoulders and all I want to do is wrap it around my fingers as I bury my face against her neck and kiss and suck at her skin.

“Tommy?” My eyes snap up to hers and the way she looks at me has me wondering if she can read my mind. “Yes?” She licks her lips and I swear she’s playing with me now. “So, let’s just clear the elephant out of the room and say, this is unexpected.” A smile tugs at my mouth. “You think?” “Did you have any idea it was me?” she asks as our drinks are dropped off. I take a sip of beer as I shake my head. “At the time, no, but now I have the benefit of hindsight, it’s maybe kinda obvious. Why, did you?” “Nope, not at all. I mean I—” Penny freezes in her chair, not finishing her sentence as her gaze shifts over my shoulder. “Pen?” I ask. “What is it?” She glances back at me, a small smile on her face as she leans in and whispers. “Um, you should probably—” “Penny, Tommy? What a surprise,” comes an annoyingly familiar accent, followed by a hand landing on my shoulder. With a sinking feeling, I look up to see Jack and Lauren standing beside our table, both of them wearing wide grins as they take in what so clearly looks like Penny and me on a date. “Jack,” I reply with a nod. “Fancy seeing you here.” Jack chuckles, squeezing my shoulder as he gives me a not-so-subtle wink. “I could say the same about you. Is this a date or something?” he asks, waving a hand between Penny and me. I swallow hard, looking across the table at her, who also just happens to be this amazing woman I know as Wine Queen. It’s literally like the universe is fucking with me right now, like it’s giving my dating and sex life a big fat middle finger as it decides whether I’m ever going to get laid again. I don’t even know how to respond to Jack’s question and as I stare across at

Penny, a part of me wants to know what her answer will be.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Penny

Tommy is watching me, his mouth opening and closing like one of those koi pond fish as Jack and Lauren stand by waiting for an answer. This boy is not quick on his feet and I’m trying to suppress the laugh that has been present since the moment they walked up. “Kind of a date,” I say, winking at Tommy and his mouth remains open this time. I’m sure my smile is giving me away, but I don’t care. He should know by now that if he leaves me in charge of something, it’s not going to go the way he hopes. I push my bottom lip out and look up at Jack and Lauren. “Tommy here got stood up by some flakey girl he met on the Internet.” I whisper the last part, like my mother would if she were telling her friends, like online dating is the equivalent to contracting an STD. “I popped in here to grab a drink and there he was sitting all alone at the end of the bar, practically crying into his drink. I mean, I couldn’t let his masculinity be mocked by a bunch of people in a bar, so here we are.” I shrug my shoulders and shoot Tommy a wry smile. He looks none too pleased with my explanation, but he’s the one who left me in charge, and he’s also the one who decided I was a “it’s not you, it’s me” girl. I’m still waiting for him to realize taking a chance on me might be worthwhile. We’ve had a great time with the bees and chatting at work and now this strangely coincidental online meeting, he can’t continue to deny there’s something between us. It’s something intense and consuming and it came out that night we slept together and in every conversation we had when we were anonymous. “Aww, bugger,” Jack says, clapping Tommy on the shoulder with an open hand. “I thought that app was your ticket.” “My ticket to what?” Tommy asks, an eyebrow going up as he waits for Jack’s response.

“Your ticket to pound town, mate.” Lauren’s face is pretty much a wash of mortification and annoyance as she swats an open hand against Jack’s arm, and it takes everything in me not to laugh out loud. Little does either of them know, but we’ve been on that train and I’d ride it again. It’s Tommy who is hell bent on avoiding what is an obvious connection. “Why? Why are you like this?” she mutters, closing her eyes and shaking her head. Jack shrugs casually, looking back at Lauren, but he doesn’t respond to her rhetorical question. “I’m sorry he’s such an idiot and I’m sorry we interrupted your date.” “It’s not a date,” I immediately deadpan, checking the expression on Tommy’s face for any changes and all I get are his pink cheeks that are slowly starting to fade after Jack’s comment. I hope he’s thinking about the night we spent together at his house and regretting turning me away. “And since it’s not a date, we’d love it if you us,” I add, pulling out the chair next to me in invitation. “Oh, I’m sure you don’t want—” Lauren starts, but Jack cuts her off with a jovial agreement, and plunks his ass down in the chair next to Tommy. “I guess we’re staying,” Lauren concedes, sitting down next to me as Tommy flags over our waiter and has Lauren and Jack order some drinks.

The night continues pretty casually, almost date-like with all of us sharing stories from working at Somerville’s and things from growing up. Tommy and Lauren have been friends since they were kids, so she has tons of dirt on him, and Jack even has a few things that make us all laugh out loud. He was quite the pain in Lauren’s ass when they were younger. And judging by the things Tommy shares, it wasn’t just Lauren’s ass. It’s good to see the two of them get along now, especially given Lauren and Jack are married. The evening takes a weird turn when the bill comes, Tommy reaching for it before I can ask what I owe. “I’ll pick this up,” he says, acting like this is commonplace between us. It isn’t and there’s no way in hell I’m letting him pay for my dinner since he was the one who wouldn’t label this a date when Jack and Lauren appeared.

“Like hell you are. We’re splitting it,” I demand, as Jack and Lauren look on with suspicion. “I thought it wasn’t a date?” Jack questions, making me smirk a little as Tommy obviously squirms. I have no idea why he’s so against even considering dating me, but this is his stance on this and so I can take my stance of being a thorn in his side then. “It’s not a date,” Tommy snaps, shaking his head, but behind his surly demeanor, I swear I see a faint curve of his lips, a simple but telling smile. He likes the chase, but I’m not interested in games or waiting for him to get his shit together. He can smile with his perfectly aligned teeth and I can watch his eyes crinkle up in the corners. He can give off that happiness that only seems to be here when I’m in his presence. He’s like a ray of sunshine and with each smile, I’m about to be sunburned, but it’s time I back away. “Next time it’s on me,” I say, letting him have his way, hitting him with a wink, knowing I’m making a big mistake. It’s the same situation I’ve been in before and in the end, I just end up hurt. He can chase me, but I’m done chasing him. This “date” we’re on will be the last time I cross the line with Tommy Andrews even if I did have a good time. Even if he had a good time. “Fine,” he concedes and again Lauren and Jack are eyeing us with suspicion and I’m starting to wonder if the only person who’s unaware of this connection between us is Tommy. Either that or he’s really good at denying it. “Well, that was a great night,” Jack says when we exit the restaurant, making his way toward the parking lot. “It was. I had a great time. I’m glad you two ended up here because I’m pretty sure it would’ve been quite boring hanging out here with the guy who got stood up.” I toss a thumb in Tommy’s direction, clenching my teeth and wrinkling up my nose. “I didn’t get...” he stops himself from itting this was actually a date. “How about I walk you to your car, Penny?” he adds, giving me a wide-eyed look. “I walked here, but thanks.” I start walking backward down the sidewalk,

waving goodnight to Jack and Lauren while Tommy stands there wondering if he should follow me or head to his car too. “Hey Pen, wait up,” he calls, jogging a little to catch up with me. “I’ll walk you home.” He reaches out, his hand sliding over my wrist and his warm fingers send a jolt of electricity through my body. Why does he have this effect on me? And why am I only attracted to men who don’t want me? I stop, looking over my shoulder, I see Jack and Lauren watching us, both with knowing smiles on their faces. “They’re watching us,” I say, my head tilting toward their prying eyes. “You may want to keep walking.” And that’s just what I do. I’m not trying to be pushy or force him into something he doesn’t want to be a part of, but I also will not wait around for him to pull his head out of his ass. All he needs to do is tell me to get lost and I’m out the door. This is the new me, ? “Penny, seriously, I’m sorry.” “You’re dishing out a lot of “I’m sorry” lately. You don’t have to be sorry and by continuing to say it, it feels like you feel guilty about something. That’s on you, not me.” I shrug, knowing he doesn’t have to keep apologizing. There’s nothing to apologize for. “This is me,” I say, pointing to the stairs around the back of Nona’s. “Thanks for dinner tonight. I really did have a nice time. I’ll see you tomorrow for mead?” “Yeah, sure,” Tommy says, his eyes narrowed in on mine. “Penny, I...” He trails off, shaking his head and starting again. “You’re so much younger than me. What are people going to think? You want kids in like five years. I’m going to be almost forty. I can’t be the old dad.” I hear him out, every excuse lamer than the next. Why is he in such denial here? “Listen, I won’t chase you. I won’t try to convince you that I’m the girl for you. I’ve been there and all I’m interested in is being the right girl. The girl who doesn’t come second. So, you can keep coming up with reasons why I’m not that

girl until you find the one you’re comfortable with. The one that doesn’t make you feel guilty, but something tells me you’re going to come up short.” “What if you—” I don’t give him a chance to finish his thought. “I won’t.” I shake my head adamantly. “I might only be twenty-three, but I know what I want. I’ve been shit on enough to know what I don’t want. Look at all the times we spent together. Look at our online conversations. Just look,” I urge, leaning in and kissing him on the cheek. “Good night, Tommy.” I take the stairs two at a time because my willpower sucks and if I don’t walk away now, I’m going to find myself waking up next to Tommy, but instead of in his beautiful house and massive king size bed, it will be in my tiny apartment on my sheets that are covered in cat hair and smell like tomatoes.

Surprisingly I fall asleep almost immediately. I figured I’d spend the rest of the night wondering if he really likes me or if I’m just a desperate loser who needs a man. But for some reason I feel different than I ever have when it comes to this kind of thing. I’ve let it go, suddenly okay with being alone. Actually, I’m not just okay with it; I’m completely good with it. I finally feel like I’m in charge of my own love life. I wake to the sound of my phone buzzing on my nightstand, rolling over to find the screen lighting up with Terra’s number. “Hey Terra,” I say, my words groggy as I try to pull myself from sleep. “Hey Penny. Sorry to call so early, but I’m supposed to work this morning and my kid is sick,” she says, hesitantly. Running the tasting room at Somerville’s isn’t just pouring wine and schmoozing with customers. It’s also managing the other employees who help out and since we’re a small bunch, when one of them is sick, it’s usually me who fills in. “No problem,” I say, trying not to sound too defeated. “What time are you supposed to start?”

“Nine.” “I’ll cover it,” I tell her, letting her know I hope her kid feels better and to keep me posted on if she’ll be in for her shift tomorrow. She thanks me and when I end the call, I fall back against my pillow. “Shit,” I mutter, realizing I’m supposed to meet Tommy at eight to get started on our mead making venture.

Me: Hey. Sorry but I’m not going to be able to make it this morning. I have to work now.

His response comes almost immediately, the bubbles popping up within seconds of me hitting send.

Tommy: Is this because of what happened last night?

Me: No. I’m not going to fuck with you like that. Give you shit and tease the hell out of you, yes, but I’m not going to lie about something.

Tommy: Ok

Me: Sorry. I know you took the day off. Maybe tomorrow?

Tommy: Yeah sure.

He seems disappointed, but maybe I’m reading into his texts too much, making more out of this than it really is. I also hate that he thinks I’m playing games. I’m really disappointed that I’ve had to cancel our mead making, and I hope he doesn’t do it without me.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Tommy

I flop back onto my pillow annoyed and disappointed. As weird as last night was and as much as I knew nothing was going to happen between Pen and me, I was looking forward to today and our experimental mead making…or to us totally fucking it up anyway. But just as I think this, I’m hit with a sucker punch of hypocrisy over my behavior. Here I am, ready to overlook the age difference and wanting kids in five years thing with my online girl, but totally dismissing it the second I find out it’s Penny. Penny, a woman I not only find insanely attractive, but also have great chemistry with and dare I say, a developing friendship that actually means a lot to me. “Jesus, what the fuck is wrong with you?” I say to the empty room. Groaning, I roll out of bed and into the shower, figuring I may as well head into work too, seeing as I’ve got nothing else going on today. I’m not going to make mead though, instead just do a couple of random jobs that need doing around the place. God, I’ve clearly got no fucking life. Just as I pull into the staff parking area at Somerville’s, my phone chimes out with a message. I grab my phone as I get out of the truck, expecting to see a text, but instead it’s a message on the Mystery Matchmaker app. Scowling at my phone in confusion, I open the app, having no idea who it’s from given Wine Queen, or Penny as I now know, was the only person I was chatting with.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: So weirdest first date you’ve ever had…Go!

I let out a hard laugh, glancing around and half expecting to see Penny standing somewhere, watching me. But the place is deserted, the winery doesn’t open for another thirty minutes.

Me: oh I’ve had a few, but my most recent one definitely takes the cake.

I throw in a couple of the hands up, what the fuck emojis, followed by the face palm one as I lean against the side of my truck, waiting for Pen’s reply.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Wow, you too? Same here…it was so…unexpected and kinda awkward and just not what I was thinking.

Me: So, a massive disappointment, then?

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: Actually, the complete opposite…although I was disappointed by how things all played out at the end…

I glance up again, a little confused by her response. Last night she told me she was done chasing and she wasn’t going to do that with me. Said this was on me and if I couldn’t see what we might have, then she wasn’t going to force it. It left me both disappointed and frustrated when I’d expected to be relieved, especially as I was the one pushing for nothing to happen between us.

Me: in what way?

The bubbles pop up and disappear for ages, making me wonder just what the hell she’s going to say to me.

WineQueenFamilyTruckster: No happy ending…

I let out a cough, surprised and a little intrigued by her answer. Before I have a chance to write back though, I’m interrupted by Jack. “Tommy, what are you doing here? Thought you had the weekend off?” I slip my phone into my pocket as I glance up. “Pen got called into work, so the mead making is off,” I reply with a shrug, trying for casual. Jack grins. “And so you thought you’d come into work too,” he says, crossing his arms over his chest. I lift a shoulder. “I guess,” I reply, even as I realize how totally lame that sounds. Jack chuckles. “To see Penny or…?” he trails off even as he rocks on his heels, that same shit-eating grin on his face. “To get some shit done,” I reply, my words a little defensive. “Right,” Jack says sarcastically. “Because you had nothing better to do.” I wave him away as I push off the car, needing to walk away before he starts talking about last night. It had been weird enough him and Lauren walking in and seeing us there and the last thing I need is a debrief from him now about exactly what happened. “Well, while you’re here,” Jack says, falling into step beside me. “Maybe you can help with some stuff over at Apple Jacks?” I glance sideways at him, wondering if this is for real or just some excuse. “Sure, what do you need done?”

Jack waves a hand in the direction of the cider house. “Just moving some stuff to get ready for the opening. But that’s not important,” he says, grinning at me. “What’s important is what the hell you and Penny were doing having dinner together last night? You know the not-date,” he adds, air quoting the last part. “Jack,” I say in warning. “I mean, it’s obvious you were on a date, which is cool, I get it,” he says, apparently ignoring me. “What I want to know is why you’re saying it wasn’t a date? Why are you so against dating her? You obviously like her and from what Lu says, it’s pretty clear she likes you too, so—” “Wait, what?” I ask. Jack grins. “I knew you fucking liked her!” he half shouts, as he fist pumps the air. “Shut up,” I say, my jaw tight. Jack glances around at the empty fields before turning back to me. “Why are you so anti-Penny?” “I’m not,” I reply, my tone a little defensive. “Oh really?” he asks sarcastically, his eyes wide and letting me know he doesn’t believe me. I let out a frustrated exhale, shoving a hand through my hair as we continue to walk over to Apple Jacks. “I’m not anti-Penny,” I repeat, having no idea why I’m even having this conversation. “I’m just…just…” “Full sentences, Tommy,” Jack says. “I can’t help if you don’t form full and coherent sentences.” I roll my eyes, shaking my head at him as I finally just blurt out, “Look, I like her, okay? She’s fun and easy to talk to and we have a great time together.” “But…” Jack says, rolling his hand in front of us as though to encourage me. “But she works here,” I say.

Jack stops walking as he turns to face me, his hands on his head and his jaw hanging open. “Oh my fucking god,” he says dramatically. “She works here, shit, well that’s totally killed that idea, I mean imagine,” he says, emphasizing the last word, “actually falling for your co-worker. Shit.” He shakes his head, a grimace on his face as he watches me. I know he’s being a sarcastic smart ass right now, that he of all people is walking proof of how two people can work and live together. But it’s different for them. “Fuck off,” I mumble as we both start walking again. Jack chuckles. “Tell me what the real reason is,” he says, serious now. “I promise I won’t take the piss.” I suck in a deep breath, letting it out slowly as I contemplate itting my real reasons for why I’m hesitant to get involved with Pen. Eventually, I just say it, figuring at this point, I’ve got nothing to lose. “She’s ten years younger than me, Jack,” I blurt out, my gaze fixed on the cider house up ahead. “We’re at different stages of life, want different things. It wouldn’t work and when she left, I’d…” I trail off, not wanting to it how shit it will be the day Penny realizes there’s a whole world out there. A world that’s infinitely more exciting than living and working at a winery, where the closest town has a population of like eighty thousand, all of whom basically live and breathe wine making. “Okay, first up,” Jack starts, reminding me he’s still here and I’ve just spilled my guts to him. “The age thing is bullshit. It’s just a number, Tommy and it doesn’t mean anything. I mean you think for one second that anyone really cares about the age?” I shrug, knowing that when it came to Wine Queen, I was apparently okay with the whole age gap thing. But is Penny really okay with it? Will she still be okay with it in ten years when I’m in my forties? “Right, so I’ll take that as a no. As for the other stuff, what makes you think Penny’s gonna leave?” he asks. “And even if she does, why can’t you go with

her?” “I don’t know,” I mumble, knowing I don’t really have any excuse other than I have a house and a job here, which suddenly sounds stupid when I consider the bigger picture. “Listen, Tom,” Jack says, putting a hand on my shoulder as we reach the front doors of the cider house. “When Lu was finally ready to it she fancied me and we got together, you think she wasn’t scared about the fact that I was here on a working visa? That I had a life and a job and whatever back in Oz?” He pauses as though waiting for my answer and all I can do is lift a shoulder as though to say, I don’t know. “She was, okay? Terrified of it actually.” “And?” I finally ask. “What’d you say to her to convince her?” Jack grins, dropping his hand from my shoulder. “Well, I mean, please, I’m pretty convincing already,” he says, even as I roll my eyes at his arrogance. “But what I told her and what I still mean to this day is that my home is with her. And it doesn’t matter where that is, here, back in Oz or on the fucking moon, as long as I’m with her, I’m good. More than good.” I don’t say anything as Jack’s words roll around inside my head, taunting me with the possibility that they could be real. “I’m not saying it’s easy being away from my friends and family and sure there are times when I miss living in Australia, but at the end of the day, Lu means more to me than any of that. And hey, we go back there at least once a year, so you know, it’s not like I never get to see the place.” He moves to the doors, unlocking them as we both walk inside. I still haven’t said anything in response to his advice and to be honest, I’m not even sure I know what to say. My mind is a swirling mess of thoughts and questions and possibilities and I can’t even begin to process if I could risk trying what he’s suggesting. “Oh, and one more thing,” he says as he throws the keys onto the bar. “Pen’s a catch, Tommy. Everyone knows that. If you don’t do something soon, I can

guarantee someone else will.”

It’s early afternoon by the time Jack and I finish up and while we didn’t speak any more about the whole Penny situation, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about all the things he said to me. I know Penny’s a catch, I mean fuck, she’s gorgeous, she’s easy going, she’s fun to be around, great to talk to and shit…amazing in bed too. I’d be stupid to ignore all of that and the chemistry that I know is between us. And the thought of her with someone else, of having to watch them together… fuck, it’s more than I can bear. I spend the whole walk back to Somerville’s trying to convince myself that I’m doing the right thing by not pursuing anything with Penny. But my brain apparently doesn’t get the memo when I walk right past my car and into the winery, my feet carrying me straight toward the tasting room. There’s still another couple of hours or so until we close and the place is pumping when I walk inside. I stop in the doorway and watch as Penny moves between the groups at the bar area, a smile on her face and a bottle of wine in each hand. She’s a natural at this type of thing, engaging the customers and keeping them happy, all while keeping track of which wines they’ve tasted, and which ones are next. Just as I’m about to walk over, I spy that little shit Dylan behind the counter, his eyes on Penny even as he pretends to be working. Scowling, I walk over, moving behind the bar as I walk up to him. “What are you doing here?” I whisper, my words low. Dylan glances up, a surprised look on his face. “Helping out,” he says. “Pen’s getting slammed and Terra’s out sick or something. I thought I’d—” “You thought you’d come in here and help, huh?” I say, air quoting the word help. “Or is it more like—”

My words are cut off though when Penny suddenly grabs my arm and yanks me away. I don’t miss the jolt of electricity that shoots up my arm at her touch, the way her fingers feel curled around my wrist as she practically drags me toward the back storeroom. “What are you doing?” she hisses, her brows narrowed. “I could ask you the same thing,” I scowl. Penny throws her hands up. “What are you talking about?” I roll my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest as I tilt my head toward the door. “Dylan’s just here helping out, is he?” I ask. Penny shakes her head, shoving me a little as she leans in and says, “He is actually.” “Right,” I say, dragging the word out. “Pretty sure helping out is not the end game here.” “Oh my god, Tommy,” she half shouts. “He’s just been dumped by this girl. He wants her back. He was actually here asking me for ideas on how to do that when it got busy. Now if you don’t mind.” She moves to walk past me, her shoulder brushing mine. Before she can though, I take a step sideways so I’m standing in front of her. “I’m sorry,” I say quickly, knowing that was a total overreaction on my part. “I was…” “Being a dick?” she suggests. I shrug, even though that’s probably a pretty fair description. Penny smirks. “Okay, a jealous dick then,” she adds, hands on her hips as she leans closer, so her mouth is at my ear. “You know, if you’re jealous, Tommy,” she whispers, her breath tickling my neck and sending a shiver down my spine, “you could always do something about it.” She walks out before I have a chance to say or do anything, leaving me standing in the storeroom. My heart is racing, my body is wired with electricity and my brain is screaming at me to walk out there and drag her back in here so I can kiss

the shit out of her. Fuck, what the hell is wrong with me?

Chapter Twenty-Five

Penny

I don’t want to flirt with him, but for some reason I find myself drawn to his impulsive and ever-changing reaction to me. He doesn’t need to be jealous because I’ve made it perfectly clear that he’s the one I want. I’m just waiting here for him to say it, too. It doesn’t matter how loud I scream what I want, he’s the one who ultimately has to decide if I’m worth foregoing all his reservations, albeit stupid reservations, to finally come to his senses. Maybe he never will. And that’s totally okay, because I’m not pushing things. I can’t stand around and dwell on his indecisiveness when I have customers to serve and a packed tasting room. Luckily Dylan stopped in and while he’s a little rough around the edges, he’s been a huge help. I can’t fault him for not being super knowledgeable about wine, especially since I was in his shoes when Lauren first hired me, and I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. With Terra out with a sick kid and the second shift person having car trouble, I’m stuck here working a double when I was supposed to have the whole day off. “Thank god you’re back,” he says, ing me a bottle to put away. “These people have a few questions about what they’re drinking. I can serve, but I sure as hell can’t answer questions.” He shrugs and hits me with a sweet smile. He’s cute in a dirty, tattooed kind of way, but more than that he’s actually far nicer than I expected him to be. He seemed all schmoozer-sweet-talker-hits-onall-the-ladies, and while he’s definitely a flirt, he’s got more going on than that. The poor guy recently realized the girl who was just supposed to be a fuckbuddy, turned out to be pretty damn great. But he realized a little too late and she

left Napa for San Francisco in the hopes of getting out of this shitty tourist town. Those were her words according to Dylan. I get it though. I’ve been there; restless and wanting more, more than a hometown can ever offer, but those people you leave behind feel slighted. My parents are still angry with me for running off at twenty-one and never finishing school, never seeing anything through to completion. Being here in Napa though and away from the judgment has made me see this place might have everything I have always been looking for. It doesn’t even have to include Tommy, but if he gets on board that would be amazing. “Have you made sure you’re offering the samples of Apple Jacks cider?” I ask Dylan as I move over to the couple at the end of the bar. “Yep, and I’m making sure to tell them about the contest if they fill out the survey.” “Ah, Dylan, you’re making my job so much easier today,” I tell him, smiling back as he nods with a goofy grin on his face. Something about the way he’s moving around in here and the way he’s smiling tells me he may have found something that’s helping him forget that girl. He’s far better at this than I ever would’ve expected. We just need to clean the dirt off of him and maybe he could cover a few shifts when I’m in a bind like this again. “Hi, welcome to Somerville’s. I was told you have a few questions for me,” I say, greeting the couple sitting at the end of the bar. It’s an older gentleman and a woman roughly the same age as him and while they aren’t regulars, they certainly don’t look like tourists either. I can’t really put my finger on it, but something about them is different than most of the people who come in here. The age ranges generally vary from bachelorette parties to girls weekends to couples on a romantic getaway. Seems Napa and wine scream romance, but these two don’t. They seem more interested in the wine than anything else. Now don’t get me wrong, most people who come in here are interested in wine, but not in a way that shows they want to know the backstory behind it all. They honestly love booze and that’s the reason they’re here. There’s nothing better

than good wine and catching a bit of a buzz. “Yes, can you give us a little background on this particular wine?” the man asks, showing me the small card that comes with the tasting they have chosen. “Of course. Everything that is sold here is locally grown and sourced. The wine you’re asking about has been aged for ten years. What’s funny is that most people go with that old adage “aged like a fine wine”, but in reality, most wines don’t need to age for years. Obviously, there are exceptions to this rule, but this holds especially true for white wines like the one you enquired about.” Both of these people are hanging on my every word and sometimes I wonder if they think I’m full of shit. Some twenty-three-year-old girl with a ridiculously stupid amount of knowledge about wines, but it’s the one thing I’ve found that I want to understand, the one thing I’m confident in my knowledge of. If you’re coming to a winery, be prepared to hear everything I know about wine. “So, this particular wine is our Olivia Chardonnay. It’s named after the owner’s daughter because it went into production while she was pregnant. Her daughter, who can be seen running around here, is just turning ten. I’ve always found it kind of fun seeing her here at the vineyard and knowing the wine is aging like she is, but she won’t go bad if left too long. Her brother on the other hand, he’s already gone bad.” I smirk at them, joking about Oscar and his witty little brain. “Is everything aged on the property?” the man asks, looking around. What you see from the tasting room just looks like rows and rows of grapevines. Somerville’s is so well designed that to the public, all you see is the beauty of the vineyards and the rolling hills in the background. The sheds and storage areas are all set back on the property, making it so that all the observer sees is the landscape. “Everything in the tasting room is aged here on property. We have a production facility that assists with some of our lower cost wines that are mass-produced. Those are generally sold in local stores.” “And so this wine is locally grown, aged and served then?” “Yep. It’s aged on property in oak barrels, so it will have a slightly longer timeline than other white wines. This is where that age thing comes in. While

yes, ten years is a long time, we wouldn’t want to age this particular white for more than that. It’s the polyphenols in the barrels that help keep the wine from breaking down over time. But mind you,” I say, my eyebrows going up as I tap the side of one of the glasses, “this wine also has high acidity to keep it from turning flabby. No one wants a flabby tasting wine.” They both chuckle a little and I’m guessing it’s either my use of the word flabby or because they don’t really have a clue what I’m talking about. Sometimes I get a bit technical and I need to slow myself down. “No one wants flabby,” the woman says, laughing, her eyes wrinkling up in the corners, showing her age. “No, this is true,” I say, joking right back with her. “But low acid in a wine can ruin it, just like flabby arms can ruin a princess wave.” She’s now laughing out loud and I’m glad she sees the humor in my joke rather than taking offense to it. It’s meant to be fun and not shameful by any means. “Thanks so much for all the information on the wine. We don’t want to take up too much of your time. It looks like you’re going to be quite busy today.” “Yeah, our weekends are usually busy and today I’m shorthanded, too.” I shrug, looking around the room as people filter in and out. Most of our visitors on the weekends are drop-ins rather than reservations and I’m sure it will stay that way all day today. “Thanks again,” they both say, giving me grateful smiles. “Oh, and that wine has a really buttery texture. Let it hit the middle of your tongue and you’ll notice it. It’s almost like an oily or buttery feel.” Both of them nod and before I walk away, the man looks directly at my nametag, and a second later he pulls out his phone. They were definitely different than the usual taster and the crazy part of me wonders if they’re swingers looking for some young girl to bring into their lifestyle. I shake my head, laughing a little at my out-of-control imagination.

The day is long and by the time we close, I realize I’ve been here for twelve straight hours. We were swamped and there was no way I could leave the two people I had on staff alone for the rest of the day. I let them go before clean up, figuring what’s another hour here anyway. They worked their asses off and both have families to go home to. I’m alone, going home to my sauce-smelling little apartment anyway, spending a bit more time here won’t kill me. I also want to go check on the bees. I’ve never been out there at night and I was recently reading that the hive tends to go quiet at night. They have sleep patterns that are almost human-like. I find it hard to believe our little hard-working bees ever go quiet. The hum of their work is constantly going during the day. I catch myself thinking and hearing me say “our” in reference to the bees has me thinking about Tommy. I don’t want to want him, but fuck my life, because I do. I want him to want me without reservations, without thinking there’s someone better, without questioning if I’m enough. But I’m done convincing boys to want me because it never goes the way it’s supposed to. Stop trying to change people and better yourself and that’s exactly what I’m doing. I turn the music up in the tasting room, changing it to something better than the soft lull we have playing during the day. “Gold Digger” comes on, echoing in the quiet emptiness of the normally crowded room and something about it feels far more calming than the emptiness. I turn it up, the words bouncing off the stillness, making me smile. I love the emptiness of the vineyard at night. It’s like two different worlds and I relish the one where I feel like I’m the only person here. Knowing Jack and Lauren live on the property, but with their house set far back, there’s no way they hear the music playing. There’s no one to disturb me and while most would call it lonely, I find solace in it all. I re-stack the glasses and wipe down the bar top. I’ve already taken the garbage out and made sure all the wine fridges are set to the correct temperatures. Once before I started working here, an employee forgot to check and the next

morning all the wine fridges had been off all night. Serving customers warm white wine isn’t ideal. Again, I find myself shaking my head, wondering just how I ended up here and how I’ve finally found something I truly enjoy doing. Between my bees and my job and finding a place where my employer not only appreciates me but is also my friend, feels deeply satisfying. I grab the mop and bucket and begin mopping the floor, the last of the jobs before clo and heading home. The music is playing and I’m dancing along, singing out loud to the lyrics. There’s no way you can’t dance and belt out the words to this song. I’m dancing my heart out, singing away and when I turn to the doorway that leads out to the vineyards, I see Tommy standing there. He’s leaning against the doorway looking so fucking hot with his disheveled brown curls and his oh so aloof smirk and eyes that melt my heart every damn time I see him. “I don’t chase him,” I mutter to myself, but fuck my life because that’s the only thing I want to do. “Don’t stop on my ,” he murmurs, his voice like sex, almost a low growl that vibrates through my whole body. “How long have you been standing there?” I ask, the tension between us building to something that is now humming between us. I’m breathless and my words come out almost desperate and I can only hope he thinks it’s because of my dancing. “Long enough,” he chides, winking at me and suddenly I’m not certain my legs will hold me up. His tongue pokes out wetting his lips and before I know it, he’s standing in front of me. “Tommy,” I start, a plea to my words and I have no idea if it’s because I need him so fucking badly or if I need him to walk away. “No more excuses,” he says, and then his mouth is on mine.

I moan when his tongue traces my bottom lip, my head falling back, an open invitation for more and he takes it willingly, sucking hard on the pulse throbbing in my neck. The chemistry between us is scorching, even hotter and stronger than it was before. I never thought a second kiss could be even better than the first, but the wait has been excruciating and it was something I never thought would happen again. “There’s something so fucking powerful in your patience, in your ability to accept and be free and I can’t walk away from that,” he says, catching me off guard. I don’t know how to respond. I’ve wanted this, wanted him and now here he is standing in front of me, itting he fucked up, and I’m so not used to that. “Come home with me,” he growls, a demand in his tone, but somehow it still holds that choice he’s always given me. “But a warning, if you don’t, I’m going to fuck you right here.”

Chapter Twenty-Six

Tommy

I’m staring down at Penny, silently willing her to say yes, that I almost miss her answer. “Yes,” she breathes out. “What?” I ask, my heart hammering in my chest. “Yes,” she repeats, her hands fisting my t-shirt as though she’s afraid I’m going to walk away. As if. I’m done walking away from this woman and all the things she does to me, the way she makes me feel. I can’t do it anymore, not when I want her so fucking badly. “Yes, you’ll come home with me or yes I can fuck you right here?” Penny’s mouth tugs into a smile as she licks her top lip and I swear, I nearly come in my pants. “Well, I did just clean up and mop the floor, so I think coming home with you is a better option.” A huge grin breaks out on my face as I crush my mouth against hers again, relishing the taste of her, the feel of her body against mine. Fuck, I’m so hard right now. “Let’s go,” I say when I pull back, both of us breathing a little harder. Pen grabs her things, locking the door behind us as I take her hand and lead her over to my car. I open the enger door, but she shakes her head, gesturing to her car. “I’ll follow you,” she says, already walking toward her car.

“Pen, wait, I—” “I’m coming home with you, Tommy,” she calls over her shoulder. “But I don’t need my car staying here all night and creating questions.” She opens her door and slips in behind the wheel, rolling her hand in my direction as if to say, hurry up. Impatient, I hop into my truck and start the engine, relieved she’s still coming home with me, even if some small part of me wonders if she also doesn’t want anyone else to know about this. I shake my head, dismissing the thought because honestly, I don’t exactly want to shout from the rooftops what I’m about to do either. Not because I’m embarrassed about it, far from it. I just don’t need the entire staff of Somerville’s and Apple Jacks gossiping about my sex life. The short drive from the winery to my place feels like it takes forever. I spend more time looking into the rearview mirror, checking Penny is still behind me, that I do on the road in front of me that it’s a wonder I don’t crash my truck. When I finally pull into my drive and shut off the engine, my body is amped, my dick hard and my fingers itching to touch her. I’m out of the truck and beside her door before she even has a chance to undo her seat belt. As soon as she’s out of her seat, my arms are around her and I’m backing her up against the side of the car, my mouth on hers in a hard kiss. Penny wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me closer. She lets out the sexiest whimper I’ve ever heard and I’m about two seconds away from fucking her against her car. “God, I want you,” I growl against her mouth. I feel her smile, her hands moving to my jeans where she undoes the belt and button. I feel her hand slip inside, her fingers curling around my dick as an embarrassingly loud groan falls from my mouth. “I want you, too,” she murmurs, kissing her way along my jaw to my neck. I feel her bite and suck at my skin, my eyes practically rolling back in my head at how damn good it feels. She starts to stroke me, so slowly, it’s almost unbearable.

“Pen,” I groan against her neck. She smiles against my skin, biting me again before she lifts her head, her eyes meeting mine. “Something wrong?” She’s smiling at me now, a teasing quality in her eyes that is a huge turn on. “Fuck no, nothing is wrong,” I growl. “But you keep this up and I’ll be fucking you against your car in a minute.” Penny raises a brow, almost as though she’s daring me. “So fuck me against my car then.” I practically growl my approval, knowing we are far away from any prying eyes or civilization that there’s not a chance in hell anyone will see us. With my mouth on hers, I grab my wallet from my back pocket, grabbing the one and only condom I have stashed in there, before I throw my wallet on the roof of her car. I then make quick work of her jeans and panties, shoving them down her legs. Penny manages to get them off one foot, but that’s all I need as I shove my own jeans down, quickly put on the condom and then hoist Penny up in my arms. Without warning, I drive into her, pinning us both against the side of her car as I bury myself inside her. “Fuck,” she moans, the word loud in the silence of the night. “Oh god, you feel so good.” I grunt something back, my own brain too fried by the feeling of being inside her again as I start to thrust hard and deep. Penny’s legs wrap around my waist, her arms around my shoulders as she clings to me, her nails digging into my back, even through the fabric of my t-shirt. I really want to do this naked and in my bed, where I can take my time and enjoy her, but right now, I need this. I need to take the edge off. It’s been a long time since I was last inside her and right now, I need a quick hit just so I can make things last later. “Oh shit, Tommy,” she moans, her heels on my ass, urging me deeper.

I move a hand between us, my thumb finding the exact spot that has her yelling out my name again. It’s enough to send us both over the edge as she comes hard around me, pulling my own release from me as I drive into her. I collapse against her, knowing I’m likely crushing her against her own car but too exhausted to move. I can feel her heart, pounding in her chest, which is pressed against mine. “Holy shit,” Penny whispers against my neck. I chuckle. “Yeah, holy shit alright.” I lift my head from her shoulder, our eyes meeting. Penny looks up at me with an extremely satisfied look on her face that does wonders for my ego. “You okay?” I ask, brushing a thumb across her cheekbone. “Oh, I’m better than okay,” she says leaning in to kiss me. “But I think I might need a shower after that.” I smile, reluctantly pulling back and taking care of the condom. “I can do you one better than that,” I say, pulling my jeans up as Penny does the same. “Oh yeah,” she says, taking my outstretched hand. “How so? Because your shower is pretty damn awesome, Tommy Andrews.” I laugh, lifting our ed hands to gently bite her knuckle. “Come and find out.” Inside, I lead her straight through to my ensuite bathroom, turning on the water for the tub. I lean in and give Penny a quick kiss before disappearing out to the kitchen. When I return to the bathroom with a bottle of wine, two glasses and a plate of cheese and crackers, the tub is nearly full and Pen is standing naked at the basin as she faces the mirror, pulling her hair into a knot on the top of her head. Smiling, I put the food and drinks on the ledge by the side of the bath before coming up behind her, my hands sliding over her warm, tanned skin. Her eyes meet mine in the mirror, watching as my fingers skim over her breasts, teasing her nipples. Her eyes close as her head falls back onto my shoulder and I press a kiss to the

side of her neck before reluctantly stepping back and stripping off my clothes. I dim the lights in the bathroom before stepping into the large tub and gesturing for her to me. She does, settling herself between my legs, her back resting against my front. “Good?” I ask, gently biting her shoulder. “Oh yeah,” she murmurs, her eyes closed as her head falls back on my shoulder. We lie in silence for a while, the whole room filled with a calming and peaceful warmth. The large floor to ceiling window offers views over the vineyard, but it’s too dark to see anything now. “So how come you finally changed your mind?” Penny eventually asks, reaching for the glass of wine I poured her. I let out a soft laugh, my fingers trailing down her neck and arm before skimming back up the side of her body. She flinches a little as though it tickles and I make a mental note to explore that more later. “You’re pretty hard to resist, Pen,” I reply. “Even if I am so much younger?” “Mmm hmm,” I murmur, my mouth now kissing a path down her neck. “And we work together?” “Yeah,” I breathe out, not really sure what she’s asking me anymore as I gently start to suck on her skin. Penny reaches forward, putting her glass down before turning in my arms so she’s facing me. I watch as she moves so she’s straddling me, her legs on either side of mine and her hands on my shoulders. She shuffles closer, her eyes locked with mine as she slides herself over my already hard dick. And then she starts to slowly torture me as she glides along my length, her eyes never leaving mine.

“Oh, fuck,” I moan as my head falls back. Penny leans closer, grinding against me again as she puts her mouth against my ear. “Is this hard to resist?” My hands move to her ass, gripping it tightly as I push my hips up, rubbing myself against her and getting dangerously close to her hot warm heat. “Something’s hard,” I say through gritted teeth, wishing to fuck I’d had the foresight to grab a condom before we got in here. “Hmmm,” she hums against my ear before she shifts her body and I slip inside her. “Pen,” I groan, knowing my resolve is dangerously close to disappearing right now. “Shut up, Tommy,” she whispers, before kissing me hard enough to silence my protests.

Afterward, I grab some clean clothes for Pen before pulling on some sweats and a t-shirt. We gather up the wine and food from the bathroom and take it into the living room. Collapsing onto the sofa, I pull her down with me so she’s half sitting in my lap. “I wish it was cold enough for a fire,” she says, motioning with her foot toward the stone hearth. “It will be soon,” I tell her, as I wrap an arm around her shoulder and pull her closer. “I’ll light it for you then.” “Maybe in a couple of months,” she says, leaning back to look at me. I shrug. “In a couple, yeah.” “So, this will still be happening in a couple of months then?” she asks. “What?” I ask, stalling a little.

Pen’s brow furrows. “This,” she says gesturing between us. I let out a breath, wishing it could be as simple as me saying yes. Instead, I answer with, “I really like hanging out with you. And I love having sex with you, so yeah, I hope this is still happening in a couple of months.” The crease in her brow deepens. “So hang on, you like hanging out with me,” she says, air quoting the word like, “but you love having sex with me?” I chuckle. She’s cute when she’s annoyed. “No, I really like hanging out with you,” I tease. Penny pinches my side, making me squirm. “Okay, okay, I really love hanging out with you and having sex with you. Equally,” I add, emphasizing the word. Penny nods once, apparently satisfied with that answer. “You know you’re kinda cute when you’re all blitzed out from sex.” I burst out laughing. “What?” She smiles, brushing her thumb across my bottom lip as she cups my jaw. “This, the softer, kinda gooey side of you, it’s cute.” “I’m not gooey.” Pen grins, tugging her bottom lip between her teeth. “You are after a couple of orgasms, but don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.” I shake my head, having no idea what she’s talking about. “Speaking of orgasms,” I say, ing what happened back in the bathroom. “What about…” I trail off, unsure how to broach the topic. Penny shakes her head, laughing a little as she settles back against me. “It’s all good, Tommy, I’m on the pill, you haven’t knocked me up or anything.” I don’t say anything, too scared that if I open my mouth, I’ll confess that actually the idea of knocking her up doesn’t scare me one bit. She must take my silence for worry though, because she turns in my lap so she’s facing me. “Seriously, it’s okay. I’m on the pill and well, I’m not exactly sleeping with anyone else.”

I exhale, tucking some loose strands of hair behind her ear. “Neither am I,” I it. “Good,” she breathes out as she leans in to kiss me.

The next morning, I wake early. Penny is still sound asleep beside me, lying on her side, her hands tucked under the pillow. It’s exactly how I found her sleeping the last time she came home with me, only this time, I don’t freak out about it. Instead, I lie back, my hands behind my head as I close my eyes and replay the events of last night. After our bath, we’d stayed talking on the couch for a while. Not about anything serious, just our bees and different ideas we’d found for the mead recipes. It had felt so easy and so right being with her like that, that I could almost forget all the stupid reasons I’d had for trying to hide my feelings for her. That all felt like a losing battle now and I knew that the more time I spent with her, the harder it was going to be when she eventually realized there was more out there for her than an older guy and a winery in the middle of nowhere. Afterward, when we’d come to bed, I’d made good on my plans to take my time with her, giving her a couple more orgasms before we’d both fallen into a deep sleep. Eventually I drag myself from bed, using the bathroom before making some coffee. Pen is still asleep, so I pour myself a cup and take it back to bed with me, carefully sliding between the sheets. She mumbles something in her sleep, moving closer to me. I gently pull her into my arms, so her head is resting on my chest as I slowly run my fingers up and down her spine. “That’s nice,” she murmurs, pressing closer. I turn and press a kiss to the top of her head, enjoying the peaceful quiet of the morning. “You working today?” She shakes her head, as she mumbles something that sounds like a no. I exhale,

wondering if she’d consider staying here for the day, maybe spending another night. As much as I’ve stopped trying to fight this thing between us and even though we’ve both itted to not sleeping with anyone else, I’m still not sure exactly what this is. Are we in a relationship here or are we just fucking? Penny shuffles against me now, propping herself up on an elbow as she glances at the coffee on the nightstand. “Are you working today?” I brush the hair back from her face. “No,” I whisper, as I pull her in for a kiss. She groans a little as I brush my lips against hers. “You wanna try making some mead?” she whispers, her voice sexy and low. My hand slips down to her ass, pulling her so she’s lying on top of me. “Mmm, I’d rather try and make you come.” Penny lets out a breathy laugh. “Challenge accepted,” she whispers as she slowly kisses a path down my body and beneath the sheets, her mouth all sorts of warm and wet and inviting against my skin. Yeah, I’m so totally fucked right now.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Penny

Well, this is not exactly how I expected yesterday to go at all. I was swamped at work; working two shifts that weren’t even mine, I think I was hit on by an older swingers couple and later found myself in Tommy Andrews’ bed all over again. And I must say round two put the first time to shame. Really there were so many rounds that I’ve lost count. We’re still in bed and I don’t give a shit if the tasting room isn’t covered today or if someone has a sick kid or if the wine doesn’t get poured, I’m basking in something I never thought would ever happen. That Tommy Andrews would pick me. “Why now?” I ask, still curled into the side of his body, well into the morning. The warmth of our bodies is floating between us and everything about this moment feels far too perfect. I don’t ask the question because I’m seeking attention or because I want to hear him say it as a way to get back at him. I’m genuinely curious as to what changed his mind, if his mind was even changed in the first place. “What do you mean?” “Well, I figured you finally noticed I have great tits and changed your mind,” I say back, smiling up at him.” He pauses, his expression darkening a little and he doesn’t return my smile. I look over his face, his features sharp and striking, his mouth tilted down at the corners and as he cocks his head to the side, he gives me a weak smile. “You’re more than that, Penny. You always have been and anyone who came before me who couldn’t see that, well, fuck them,” he asserts, as he climbs on top of me, pinning my arms above my head. I laugh, a nervousness suddenly moving through me. I’ve been told a lot of

things in my life, a lot of bullshit from guys and I’ve believed it, but with Tommy, there’s more truth in his words than I’ve heard. He’s honest and raw and real, and what he says isn’t said to manipulate me or cover up a lie. But it still catches me off guard. “You’re amazing and beautiful and smart, brilliant, actually. You make me want to be a better person, a happier person now that I have someone to share my life with,” he adds, each word making my cheeks flush a little darker. “But do I have nice tits?” I ask, deflecting from all the honesty in his words, because like hell if I have any idea how to respond other than with humor. This isn’t the norm, but it’s exactly what I’ve been searching for. “Can’t you ever just be serious for a second and just say thank you? Let’s try that. Just thank me and realize what I’ve told you is true,” he says, taking my face in his hands. He brushes his thumbs along my cheeks, the warmth of his touch making my skin heat up even more. “Thank you,” I murmur, my words nearly lost in the vastness of his vaulted ceilings, but the smile on his face tells me he heard it. I feel like I’m in some kind of alternate universe where I live in this stunning house with this amazing boyfriend, because this can’t possibly be my life. I don’t land guys like Tommy and I don’t live in houses that look like they should be photographed for Better Homes and Garden magazine and I don’t get a job that I love and people that respect and value what I do, but here I am. “You’ll get better at that because I plan to make sure you hear it regularly,” Tommy announces, burying his face in my neck and making me squeal with laughter as his breath tickles the sensitive spot right below my ear. “It was always you.” Now he has me laughing even harder and it’s not because of the closeness of his mouth to my ear, or the way his hands move up the bare skin along my ribs. “What the hell is so damn funny? I was trying to have a moment with you,” he says, sounding slightly offended, but the smile on his face says otherwise. “I don’t know. I’m not used to this. You don’t have to try so hard.” “I’m not trying, Penny. That’s the point,” he says, his eyebrows going up as he

waits for me to respond. “Even when I fought it, I knew it was you.” “So, when are we having a baby?” I ask, all humor in my words gone, the seriousness now moving through the room and I have to bite down on my bottom lip to keep the stifled laugh from escaping. Tommy’s grip on my wrists loosens and the look on his face has me struggling to keep it together. His mouth drops open and quickly closes as he swallows hard. I swear he’s far too easy to make squirm. “Settle down. It was a joke,” I say, swatting at his chest. “We’re like one day into this and I’m pretty sure neither of us are ready for that conversation.” “Penny, I’m ready for anything with you,” he says, leaning down and pressing his lips to mine. As much as I like to think we aren’t that cheesy couple, I let his words wash over me, warming me and making me feel like I’m the only girl for him. Sometimes we all need to hear that we’re wanted, that we mean something to someone else. I’ve spent my life looking for that person, to find that one person who understands me and sees me for who I am, appreciates all I have to offer. When I finally gave up looking, I found him; we found each other. “Does the age difference really worry you?” I now ask, kissing the tip of his nose. “No, but I worry about you. I don’t care at all. I just don’t want people whispering about this hot girl with her old boyfriend.” “Do you think I give a shit? People are gossips and I couldn’t give a fuck what they have to say. Our relationship isn’t their business.” “Even if it’s our bosses?” Tommy asks, hesitantly. My head is now cocked to the side, giving him a look that says he needs to question his own words. It obviously works, because he chuckles a little. “I guess they have been trying to set us up for a little while, huh?” he now questions, and I add in a nod and an eye roll. Jack and Lauren will be thrilled to

find out what’s happened between us. It feels like they love the idea of their little business being literally one big family. “They have and I guess they were right all along,” I say, realizing both of us fought it. I continually rolled my eyes at Lauren and Ellen’s remarks about Tommy being a great guy and how we would actually be perfect together. Neither of them is going to let me live this down when they find out. “So, are we making mead today or what?” Tommy asks, changing the subject. “I think that was the plan,” I pause, looking out the window at the sun coming in through the slats in the blinds. It’s far later in the morning than I think either of us thought it would get, but the time has definitely been well spent. “I guess we better get moving.” I swat Tommy on the ass and within seconds his arms are underneath me and he’s tossing me over his shoulder. “Tommy!” I scream out, my ass in the air as he carries me toward his bathroom. I swat his bare butt a few times and in return he bites the side of my ass. “Stop squirming or I’m going to drop you. Don’t you want to take a shower in my, how did you put it again, awesome shower?” “Yes!” I shout, knowing we’ll be doing anything but actually getting clean.

It takes us a bit but we’re finally inside the shed where we set up to process the honey we collected from our bees. The bees are still producing and we’ll need to do another round of harvesting and extracting, which is great because if this whole mead thing works, we’ll need a lot more honey. Tommy had moved what we collected into the back of the storage shed, placing it on a few shelves. We have a five-gallon container full after transferring the jars and since this is our first time ever doing this, we can only hope we got it right. “You ready?” Tommy asks, his nose wrinkling up as we both obviously begin to question what the hell we are doing. It’s a risk, something we could potentially fuck up, but if we succeed it could mean a new adventure for both of us.

Lauren, Jack and Ellen are always open to adding new products to the Somerville name and expanding their business. We would never look at taking this venture anywhere else given we’ve used their land, technically their bees and all their equipment. It may be us putting in the hard work, but it’s their business that has allowed us to do it. Tommy now heaves the five gallon bucket off the shelf and onto the floor, peeling back the lid to reveal the smooth amber liquid. I think the collective sigh of relief that falls from our lips can be heard all around the vineyards and both of us look at each other, chuckling a little as my heart rate begins to slow back down. I had no idea opening a barrel of honey would cause such a spike in my anxiety and my heart to race wildly in my chest, thumping hard and fast with wonder. “It looks the same as the day we put it in here,” Tommy announces with relief, his chest puffing out and falling quickly, his shoulders sagging as if they were holding up too much. “I think that’s what we hoped for, right?” I ask, realizing neither of us has a clue what we’re doing other than now becoming experts in watching YouTube videos on how to keep bees, how to harvest honey and now how to make mead. We’re those Internet idiots who think watching videos makes us capable of this. “What the hell are we even doing?” I ask now laughing. “What if the honey tastes like shit?” “It probably does,” Tommy states, laughing right along with me. “I guess we should taste it before we get too far into this, huh?” I grab a sanitized scoop from where we have our materials all ready to go and I dip it into the vat of honey, spooning it into a bowl. I run my finger through it, swirling it around so I get a decent amount of the sticky liquid on my finger. “You first,” I say, holding out my honey-covered finger to him. “Now you know how much I love licking things off your body, but I’ll be a

gentleman today and let you go first.” We’re eyeing each other suspiciously, my finger dangling in front of us with the honey starting to drip. “I insist you go first,” I prompt, moving closer to him with my finger extended toward his clamped shut mouth. He looks like a toddler who is being forced to eat mushy peas. “I’ll even do a little airplane noise as I put my finger in your mouth. Come on now, open up.” Before I can react, he’s dipped his fingers into the small bowl of honey and has me pinned against the workbench behind us. The weight of his muscled body has me trapped and laughing. All he has to do is press the lower half of his body against mine and I’m stuck. He’s too strong. Damn all those years of manual labor at this vineyard! “Open up, Pen,” he says, laughing so hard tears are streaming from his eyes and I’m pretty sure I look the same as I struggle against him. “Don’t make me,” I threaten, my fingers in front of his lips. “Make you what?” he asks, his words seductive, but still somehow temptingly hilarious. He knows what I’m about to do; the question is, which one of us will do it first. I run my honey-covered finger gently over his lips and his tongue darts out instinctively to lick off the stickiness, and in that moment, something in him changes. His pupils widen and he takes my finger into his mouth sucking softly at first and then harder. Everything that is felt in my finger sends a jolt through my entire body, and I push myself against him, feeling exactly what this is all doing to him too. He cleans my finger off, his tongue caressing it in small circles and he lets it slide from his mouth and both my hands fall to his chest, gripping his t-shirt. “Fuck, Penny,” he whispers, his lips next to my ear, his breath warm and seductive and I’m now wondering what the hell we’re doing in this shed, because it certainly isn’t making mead.

I wrap my hand around his wrist and lift his fingers to my mouth now, slipping them in and tasting what he just tasted too. “So sweet, so wet,” I whisper back, enjoying the groan I hear, all throaty and deep, that falls from his mouth. “If we weren’t in this shed right now, I’d fuck y—” He’s suddenly cut off by the sound of a loud little voice ringing out. “Oh my god, it’s happening again,” I hear Olivia call out, and when I look toward the sound of the voice, she and Oscar are standing at the entrance to the shed. “What is with this place?” Oscar asks, looking at Olivia with his nose turned up and his mouth pulled into a disgusted scowl. “I don’t know, but I’m getting out of here before I catch whatever disease is going around here,” she replies, flipping a pigtail over her shoulder and running in the opposite direction of the shed. “Get a room!” Oscar yells out, jetting after Olivia and leaving the two of us, hot, bothered and smirking at those two meddling kids.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Tommy

“Well, I guess any plans we might have had for keeping this quiet have just been shot to shit,” I say, grinning as I lean in to kiss the honey still on Penny’s lips. She lets out a soft groan, kissing me back even as she asks, “Did you want to keep it quiet?” “Nope,” I reply, pushing against her again as I deepen the kiss. I feel Penny’s hands gripping my hips now, pulling me closer as her tongue slips between my lips and tangles with mine. I can taste our honey, the sweetness an intoxicating addition to the already sweet taste of her. “You sure?” she mumbles, as I drag my tongue across her bottom lip. I pull back, my breathing a little harder as my heart pounds in my chest. “Yeah, why? Did you?” Pen shakes her head before I’ve even finished my question. “Hell no,” she says with a smile, before closing the distance and kissing me again. I feel myself getting lost in her, drowning in this kiss and how fucking good it feels to finally have her, to have itted to her how I feel about her and to know she feels the same way. Fuck everything else and all the dumb reasons I had for not pursuing this with her. “Well, well, well, what have we got here?” “Oh fuck,” I say, as Jack’s all too familiar Australian accent fills the shed and Pen freezes against me. I pull back a little, meeting her gaze. Her brows lift, eyes wide as she smiles in surprise. I can’t help but chuckle, knowing it was only a matter of time given Oscar and Oliva busted us before.

“What was that, like two minutes?” Pen asks, glancing at her empty wrist as though to check the time. “Must be some kind of record.” I laugh. “Pretty sure Jack has them doing recon for all kinds of shit these days. They’re worse than ever since he’s been living here.” “Um, you know I can hear you right?” Jack says. Penny giggles as we both turn to face the music. I wrap an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close as Jack stands with his arms crossed over his chest, his eyes flicking between us. “What?” I eventually ask. Jack smirks, rolling his eyes as he says, “Well, first of all, you’re welcome.” I scoff. “Um, for what exactly?” Jack uncrosses his arms as he holds up a hand and starts to count off on his fingers. “For telling you both about that app, for suggesting you two hook up, for basically being right about everything. Do you need me to continue?” “Oh jesus,” Pen mutters looking up at me. “Is he serious right now?” I shrug, as Jack continues, “Ah yeah, of course I’m serious. I’m also waiting, so anytime you want to say it.” “Say what exactly?” I ask, confused. Jack laughs, stepping closer, his arms out as if to say isn’t it obvious. “Yes, Jack, you were right, we were wrong, obviously.” “Oh my god,” Penny says. “We are seriously never hearing the end of this, are we?” Jack lifts a brow, a smug look on his face as he says, “Nope, probably not. I mean wait till Lu hears about it, which won’t be long by the way, given Oscar and Ollie came tearing out of here screaming it for the world to hear.” I shake my head, even as Jack continues to laugh at us.

“Well whatever, we aren’t exactly trying to hide it,” Penny says, just as Oscar strolls back into the shed, holds up what looks to be a camera and wordlessly snaps a picture of us. Jack bursts out laughing as the polaroid slides out of the camera and Oscar pinches it between his fingers, shaking it a little as he turns to Jack. “Got them!” he says proudly, throwing his arm in the air. “Nice work, bud,” Jack says, ruffling his hair. “Although it’s not exactly a compromising position,” he adds. “What’s compromising?” Oscar asks as I blurt out, “What the fuck?” “Tommy,” Pen warns, smacking my chest as her eyes flick to Oscar. I glance over at him, rocking on his heels now, a cheeky smile on his face at having heard me drop an f-bomb. Smiling, Jack waves a hand around. “We had a pool going on all of this,” he says matter of factly. “Lu had you down for a couple of weeks ago when we busted you on that date you weren’t on,” he adds, air quoting the last part. “I said before that when I worked out you’d gotten laid,” he says, gesturing to me. “While Ellen thought around now and Will had you for opening night at the cider house.” “Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Penny says, shaking her head. “You guys seriously need to get a life.” “Yeah, and we need to get on with making our mead, so if you don’t mind…” I point toward the door, signaling that Jack and Oscar can go. “You weren’t making mead,” Oscar shouts. “You were kissing and being gross and stuff.” “It’s code, Oscar,” Jack says, steering him out the door. “Don’t worry, one day you’ll understand.” He gives us a wink before he and Oscar walk back outside, finally leaving us alone. As soon as they’ve left, Pen turns in my arms, a smile on her face as she looks up at me. “So,” she says.

“So,” I repeat back. “Guess we really are doing this then, huh?” I smile, leaning down to brush my lips against hers. “Guess we really are.” She laughs a little, smacking my ass as she says, “Okay then.”

We spend the next couple of hours putting our limited google and YouTube knowledge to use as we attempt to turn our honey into mead. It’s relaxed and fun, probably more so given everything that’s now happened between us. Despite my earlier reservations about starting a relationship with Pen, everything just feels so easy and right. Our conversations come naturally, only now they’re peppered with flirty comments like our online chats were and lots of make out sessions. No one comes in to bother us either, making me wonder if anyone besides Jack was in earshot when Oscar and Olivia blew our cover. At this point, I honestly don’t even care. I mean, I know we’re going to get shit about it, and we will literally never hear the end of Jack’s bragging about getting us together, but with the way I’m feeling right now, none of that shit bothers me. “So, what now?” Penny asks as we pour the rest of our mead concoction into the waiting vats. I shrug. “We let it sit for a bit, right?” Pen returns the shrug. “Guess so. God, we’re totally winging this, aren’t we?” I chuckle. “We are, but fuck it, it’s been fun.” Pen smiles at me as she walks over, slipping her arms around my waist. “It has been.” I lean down to kiss her. “Speaking of fun, you wanna come over again tonight?” “I do,” she whispers against my mouth. “But I have to go home and feed my cat.

Plus, I need some clean clothes.” “You have a cat?” I ask, pulling back. Penny laughs. “Yeah, I do. Why?” “I don’t know,” I say with a shrug. “Never thought about it, I guess. But we can go back to your place if you want.” Pen looks up at me, a crease between her brows as though she’s totally weirded out by my suggestion. “What?” I ask, laughing. “Well, first of all, my place smells like the inside of a pizza oven because it’s above an Italian restaurant. Second, it’s pretty much the size of a pizza oven too, so totally not cool. And third, why the hell would you want to come to my place when you have such an awesome house?” A loud laugh falls from my mouth. “Pen, I don’t care where I am, as long as I’m with you.” “Oh god,” she moans. “You are literally fucking perfect. It’s so unfair.” “Unfair?” “Yes,” she cries. “How do I compete with that?” Chuckling, I kiss her again. “You don’t have to compete with anything, because I happen to think you’re pretty perfect too.” “Ugh, see, this is what I mean,” she replies, feigning annoyance. “I tell you what,” I suggest. “Let’s head into town. We can grab you some clothes and your cat. Then we’ll go back to my place and hang out there. Sound like a plan?” “What?” she asks surprised. “And bring my cat to your place?” “Sure, why not?” “Um, I don’t know, because it’s a cat?” Pen suggests as though that answers everything.

I burst out laughing. “Yeah and I like cats, so it’s not a big deal.” “Ugh,” she groans again, pres on her toes to kiss me. “Way too perfect.”

We head outside the shed to the parking area. It’s late in the afternoon, although the winery is still open, and people are milling about, clearly enjoying the tail end of summer. The whole place feels both relaxed and full of life and not for the first time do I think how grateful I am that I live and work here. “What do you feel like for—” The rest of my question is cut off by the sound of Lauren screaming as she runs toward us, arms outstretched. “Oh shit,” Pen mumbles before we are both engulfed in a hug. “Oh my god, I’m so happy for you. This is fantastic,” Lauren screams as she squeezes us. Penny laughs, even as I gently ease Lauren back. “Jack and his big mouth,” I say, pretending to be annoyed. Lauren laughs. “Actually, the big mouth belonged to Oscar, but yes, he gets a lot of encouragement from Jack.” She steps back, looking at both of us, a huge smile on her face as she claps her hands together. “So, this is happening huh?” “It is,” Penny replies, smiling. “And so you were on a date that night?” Lauren asks, a hopeful expression on her face. I chuckle. “Sort of.” “What does sort of mean?” she asks, as hopeful is replaced with confused. Penny looks up at me. “We were both on a date with our app person, only we didn’t realize each other was our app person until that night.” “Wait, seriously?” Lauren asks, eyes widening. “Holy shit!”

“What?” I now ask. Lauren claps her hands together again, jumping around as though this is the best news she’s ever heard. “I win!” she shouts. “I fucking win the pool!” I reach out and put a hand on her shoulder, stilling her. “Exactly how much is this pool, Lauren?” She grins at both of us. “Eight hundred bucks,” she replies, clapping her hands again. “Eight hundred?” Penny and I say at the same time, before I add, “You guys bet two hundred each that we would hook up?” “Yep,” Lauren says with a nod. “And there is nothing more satisfying than collecting, especially when it involves beating my older sister and my husband.” “Okay, well technically,” Pen says, holding out a hand as if to stop her, “we did actually hook up before that, even if it wasn’t technically when we actually got together.” “Wait, what?” Lauren asks, her smile disappearing. “No, no, no, don’t say that. That would mean Jack wins.” I can’t help but laugh at the look of mortification on her face. “Well, technically, Lu,” I say, using the nickname he usually uses, “you shouldn’t have bet on us now, should you?” “What do you want to keep quiet?” she asks quickly, her tone serious now as she glances between us. My mouth curves into a smile as I turn to Penny who’s looking up at me, a look on her face that suggests she already knows what I’m thinking. “What do you think, is half a fair cut?” Lauren makes a little noise, as though she can’t believe she’s on the verge of losing half her winnings. “Well,” Pen says, an evil smile on her face now. “I’d say at least half, I mean they did—”

“Wait, stop,” Lauren cuts in, her hand on Penny’s arm. “Yes?” I ask. Lauren swallows hard. “What if we say, you guys keep all of your mead business and I don’t charge you any expenses for storage or whatever.” I burst out laughing at her suggestion as Penny says, “Seriously, Lauren, that’s like—” “We’ll take it,” I agree quickly, holding my hand out to shake on it. Lauren turns to me, her mouth set in a firm smile as she reaches over and shakes my hand. “Not a word to Jack or Ellen about the timing,” she says, eyes wide as she air-quotes the last word. “Not a word,” I reply with a wink. Lauren gives a final nod to both of us before turning on her heel and heading back to the main building. As we head back to the car, Pen is quiet and when I look down at her, she’s got a look on her face that suggests she’s deep in thought. “Hey, you okay?” I ask, squeezing her shoulder. “Yeah, I…” she trails off, looking around the Somerville property before looking up at me. “I can’t believe…” “They bet on us?” I ask. “No,” Pen replies, shaking her head. “I can’t believe Lauren gave us the mead business.” I smile, leaning down to kiss the top of her head. “Guess this means we’re in business together.” Penny wraps her arms around my waist, pulling me closer as she says, “Nope, I think it means you’re stuck with me.” “Nowhere else I’d rather be, Pen,” I reply, my stomach flipping a little at the

implication of our words.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Penny

We pull around to the back of the restaurant and I point to the empty spot alongside the narrow stairs that lead up to my apartment. “Right there,” I say, my finger indicating to my spot. “Park right there.” My apartment is the only one above Nona’s, but the parking lot is busy with employees’ cars and restaurant goers. Tommy pulls his truck into the spot and cuts the engine, turning to look at me. “You wanna grab a bag and your cat and we’ll order some dinner when we get back to my house?” “Yeah, sure,” I reply, opening the car door and climbing out just as Tommy follows suit. “Wait. You’re coming upstairs with me?” I’m looking at him over the hood of his truck. “Um, yeah. Did you think I was going to wait in the car like some kind of asshole?” He starts to walk around the truck toward me. His strides are wide and he’s standing in front of me in just a few seconds, a harsh look of annoyance on his face. Reaching forward, he takes hold of the back of my neck, moving me to him as his mouth connects roughly with mine. His kiss nearly makes my legs give out from underneath me. It’s all warm and desperate, our tongues tangled and our breathing labored. He pulls back, but his hand slips under my t-shirt, his fingers gripping my hip. “What do I have to do to make you believe that I’m all in? I’m so fucking in, Penny and when we get upstairs to your apartment, I’m going to show you exactly how in I am.” “I was wondering where the dirty talking guy I met online was,” I reply back, trying not to sound so utterly breathless and needy, but fuck me, I’m so desperate to have him inside me suddenly.

“Oh, he’s still here,” he murmurs, tangling his hand in my hair and pulling my head to the side as he sucks at my neck. “I’m so fucking hard right now, and I want to bury myself inside your tight, wet—” I slap a hand over his mouth, biting down on my lip so I don’t moan out loud and cause everyone within an earshot to look over at us making out in a restaurant parking lot like a pair of horny teenagers. “Upstairs. Now,” I bite out, grabbing his wrist and yanking him toward the stairs. I don’t even finding my keys in my purse, but the door flies open and I slam it shut behind us. Seymour begins to meow at my feet, nuzzling his face into my ankles, but Tommy and I are already wrapped around each other, our hands tugging at our clothes. “This is my cat,” I manage to mutter between reckless and messy kisses. “That’s not the cat I want right now,” he growls back, shoving his hand into the front of my leggings. His fingers find my wet center and I moan out loud when he slips his finger inside me. But it’s short lived as he pulls it out and slips it into his mouth, his eyes focused on my face. He watches me, sucking my wetness from his fingers, and everything in me feels like it’s on fire, scorching hot and desperate to come. “So fucking sweet,” he whispers, tracing my bottom lip with his damp finger. “I can’t get enough of you, Penny.” “Bedroom,” I demand, unable to form anything more than a single word. We strip off our clothes, tossing them all over my tiny apartment as we fumble toward the bedroom, hitting the bed. Tommy’s ass hits the bed first, shirtless and so sexy, his pants undone, his length pushing up through his boxers, hard and ready. “I want you right here,” Tommy barks, his finger tapping against his swollen lips. “Sit on my face, Penny.” He crooks his finger, calling me over. “What the fuck is happening right now? Is this really my life?” I mutter, a

tingling sensation rolling over my entire body, wanting his mouth on me, wanting so desperately to come all over his face. “I’m your fucking dream come true, baby,” he says, gripping my thighs as I climb on top of him. The scruff of his face rubs the inside of my thighs and I swear just that sensation alone makes me feel like I’m going to lose all control. His breath is hot, his tongue warm and it feels totally unfamiliar to have myself above him, but I throw any inhibitions I have out the window and ride his tongue as he fucks me.

“That was unbelievable,” I say, my breathing still all erratic and ragged as I collapse next to Tommy. “Oh, we aren’t even done yet,” Tommy murmurs, pinning me underneath him, his mouth still wet with my arousal. “I want you to taste what I taste,” he adds, letting his lips trail against mine. My tongue pokes out, brushing along his lips and tasting myself on him. It’s erotic and sensual and the soft groan that falls from his mouth encourages me. I reach between us, my hand wrapping around his impressive length as I stroke him up and down, slowly. “I think you were saying something in the parking lot about wanting to be buried inside me,” I pause, letting my words linger between us, letting the silence remind him what he was saying. “Something about burying your thick, eightinch cock inside my tight, wet...” My words stall out as he enters me, making both of us moan. “You’re good for my ego, baby,” he says, nipping at my swollen bottom lip. “We’re good for each other.”

An hour later we’re lying in my bed, sated and drowsy, Seymour curled up in a ball at the bottom of the bed. Life feels completely new and different and I never

want this feeling to end. It finally feels like I’m not on the receiving end of a shitty relationship, where I give and get nothing in return. Tommy is certainly all about giving. “So, this is your apartment,” he says, his fingers absentmindedly twirling my hair as we bask in the simple silence. “This is it. All ten square feet of it,” I reply. “Your place is better.” “Your place is quaint and it smells like pizza. I’m kinda into it,” he teases. “Stop giving me shit. Not everyone can have a best friend who owns a vineyard and allows them to build a fucking dream house on it.” “It’s your dream house?” Tommy now asks, rolling over to look at me, his eyes scanning my face. “Come on, it’s everyone’s dream house.” It’s the kind of house that puts HGTV to shame. It’s the kind of house that you could find yourself not wanting to leave, ever. It’s decked out with luxury bathrooms, an upscale kitchen with marble counters and stunning black cabinets. Even if it’s not your style, it’s the kind of house anyone could appreciate, especially when you take in the view. “Then move in with me,” he simply states without even giving it a moment’s hesitation. “I decided I wasn’t going to do that anymore,” I reply back, not even realizing how stupid that sounds. It makes me sound trashy and cheap, like that’s how I’ve lived my life up until now. And while that’s slightly true, okay, it’s a lot true; he doesn’t need to know that. “You’re lumping me in with all those assholes you’ve dated now?” Tommy asks, and I can’t tell if he’s genuinely offended or if he’s giving me shit. “Who’s the judgy one now?” He straddles my hips, taking my wrists in one hand and pinning them above my head. He looms over me with his hard eyes and his disheveled curly brown hair

and for a split second I feel like I might cry. He’s perfect. “I’m not going anywhere, Penny. We’re in this together whether you move in with me or not. Whether you one day marry me and have my babies, or not. I will be here even if everything we do is unconventional and everyone on the outside thinks it’s weird. You know why?” he now asks, and I shake my head, the words stuck in my throat, my heart racing at what I feel coming. “Because I’m fucking falling in love with you.” A heartbeat of breaths es between us, the silence floating in the room as his words echo in my head. I hear them, loud and clear and with so much truth, so much truth because I feel it too. “I’m falling in love with you too.” I throw my arms around his neck and pull him to me, kissing him, my lips touching every part of his face. “Then move in with me. Have my babies. Start a business with me. Be my wife,” he says laughing with each word. “You’re crazy!” I call out to the room, my words loud as a giddy feeling of excitement washes over me. “Crazy fucking in love with you, Penny Cartwright!” he yells back, making me laugh even harder. “Let’s start our business and help Jack open Apple Jacks and throw an epic fucking party that you organized.” “Everything is falling into place,” I whisper, wondering if saying it too loudly will make it all disappear. “It’s not going away. You’ve worked for this. I’ve worked for this. We deserve it. We deserve each other.” I shake my head, trying not to laugh at just how adorably cheesy he is right now, but I understand it. I feel it just like he does.

“And we don’t have to make mead forever. You can work in the tasting room and tend to the bees or if you never want to work again, you don’t have to, but all I want is you to do what makes you happy.” “Being with you and working at the vineyard makes me happy. Everything else that has come along is just an added bonus,” I tell him, my hand now resting on his cheek, our eyes focused on each other. He leans down, kissing my forehead, his lips resting there for a few seconds as we both bask in this moment of pure, raw honesty. “Speaking of the tasting room,” I now add, wrinkling up my nose as I try to figure out how to say this. “I think I got hit on by a swingers couple the other day at work. Either that or they’re looking for someone to a threesome.” “What?” he coughs out, caught off guard by my announcement. “You really know how to ruin a moment, don’t you?” he now teases, pinching my side. “But you gotta fill me in.” Sometimes I think my imagination runs a little too wild, but what fun would it be if I just acted like that couple were tourists visiting the vineyard. They weren’t, that was obvious, but what they were doing there is completely open to speculation. “They came by the tasting room and stayed a long time. It was the day Dylan was helping me out.” Tommy instantly rolls his eyes at the mention of Dylan’s name and I swat at him. He’s so fucking cute when he’s jealous even if he refuses to it that’s what it is. “Settle down. I won’t say Dylan’s name again. And besides, I’m certain he has no idea how to make me come with his mouth the way you do. No one does.” I wink and kiss the tip of his nose, seeing him relax a little, but also basking in the compliment about his bedroom skills. “But so, the couple had a ton of questions about the wine...” “Pen, you work in a tasting room. Everyone has questions about the wine. What the hell makes you think this couple was trying to woo you into their bed?” He

shakes his head, chuckling a little at how ridiculous this sounds. “Yes, I know, but this was different. Then they started asking me how long I’d worked at Somerville’s and where I was from and how old I was and if I had a boyfriend. It got a little more personal than, ‘hey, is this merlot from 1989?’ and they ended up spending like three hours with me.” “I guess you are a pretty good catch, but maybe they were just really friendly.” “Yeah, maybe.”

Chapter Thirty

Tommy

“Are you nervous?” I ask as I walk into the bedroom to find Penny standing in the middle of the room looking around as though she’s lost something. She turns to me, half dressed in a pair of jeans and a bra. “No. Yes. Maybe…shit, I don’t know.” I laugh as I walk over to her, slipping my arms around her waist. “Need me to take the edge off?” I tease, kissing the side of her neck. Penny presses against me, a low groan falling from her mouth as she puts her hands on my chest. “Yes. No. I don’t know.” Smiling, I gently bite and suck on her skin as her fingers grip my shirt now. “Which one is it, Pen?” I murmur. “Yes?” I slip a hand up her back, my fingers playing with her bra strap. “No?” My other hand grips her hip, gently pushing her back a little. “Or—” “Fuck, Tommy,” she groans, her mouth finding mine in a hard kiss as her hands slide into my hair, gripping hard. “Yes then,” I say, smiling as I back her up to the bed. Penny moans, her warm body pressing against mine. “You are a bad, bad influence, Tommy Andrews,” she murmurs against my mouth. “Are you complaining?” I ask, unsnapping her bra now, as my hand slides round to cup her breast. It’s been a week since she gave up her apartment and moved in with me and honestly, it’s been even better than I expected. I fucking love sharing my home with her and her grumpy cat. I love that we go to work together every day and come home together every night. I love that I get to fall asleep beside her every night too and then wake up next to her every morning.

And fuck me, we haven’t been able to keep our hands off each other, much like right now. “Pen?” I prompt as I ease her back onto the bed. “No,” she breathes out. “I am definitely not complaining.” I chuckle, kissing my way down her neck to her breast. “Good,” I say before sucking her nipple into my mouth.

Thirty minutes later and we are both re-dressed and walking out to my truck. Although I did my best to get Pen nice and relaxed, I can tell she’s still a little distracted and nervous. “It’s going to be fine, babe,” I say as I start the engine. “It’s just dinner.” Pen slams her door shut before yanking on her seatbelt. “Yeah, just dinner with our bosses,” she says, shooting me a sideways glance. “No,” I say, smiling as we make our way into Napa. “Dinner with our friends.” “Who bet on us getting together,” she adds, her brows narrowed. “And who can’t seem to stop giving us shit about it either.” I chuckle, knowing she’s right. Especially when it comes to Jack who seems to think it’s his single greatest achievement since moving to Somerville’s. “I know, they can be real assholes, but you know they come from a place of kindness, right?” “Hmmm,” she replies, crossing her arms over her chest as if she isn’t sure whether she believes me. “And,” I add, reaching for her hand, “considering I’ve known three of them for most of my life, just think of all the things you can now find out about me.” Pen’s eyes widen as her mouth now curves into a devilish smile. “Oh, I didn’t think about that part.”

I lift her knuckles to my mouth, kissing them. “I mean, not that there’s much to tell, of course.” She scoffs, turning in her seat so she’s facing me. “Bullshit.” “What?” I say in surprise. “You think I’ve got stories, huh?” She smirks at me, her hand now resting on the back of my neck. “I do, yes,” she says with a nod. “And I also think underneath this quiet, rough and rugged man, is a very, very naughty boy.” “Me, a naughty boy?” I tease. “How can you think that, Pen?” She laughs as she leans closer, so her mouth is against my ear. “Because you have a dirty mind and a filthy mouth,” she whispers. “There’s not a chance in hell you don’t have some naughty secrets.” I groan as I pull into the parking lot with a hard-on now thanks to Pen and her whispered words. “Jesus, woman,” I practically growl. “I kinda wish you still had your apartment here because I’m about two seconds away from fucking you.” Pen kisses my cheek, her hand moving between my legs and giving me a gentle squeeze before she hops out of my truck. I follow after her, subtly trying to readjust myself. “Well, I don’t,” she says, smiling as she walks around the truck to me. “Because I love living with you in your awesome house.” I throw an arm around her shoulders, pulling her against me. “I love it too, babe and you are absolutely going to pay for that,” I say, my eyes flicking back to the car. “When we get back to our awesome house.” Pen giggles. “Can’t wait.”

Jack, Lauren, Ellen and Will are all waiting for us when we walk inside the restaurant, the four of them sitting around a large table, huge grins on their faces as though they know exactly why we are a little late.

“Evening,” I say to each of them, ignoring the looks as I pull out a chair for Pen. After she’s sat down, I take the chair next to her and look up to find all of them still watching us. “What?” Lauren smiles at me, glancing at her sister briefly before turning back to us. “Nothing,” she replies. I roll my eyes at her because of course I know her answer is bullshit. “Just ask what you want to ask,” I say, waving a hand at all of them as I rest my other arm across the back of Penny’s chair. “I didn’t say anything,” Lauren says, her hands up. Smirking, I reply, “You didn’t have to. Come on, let’s just get this over with.” “Okay, I’ll start,” Jack says, leaning forward, his arms crossed on the table. “It was totally my app that did this, wasn’t it?” I glance at Pen, who’s smiling. “Pretty sure it’s not actually your app, Jack,” she says. “Whatever,” he dismisses, waving a hand flippantly. “It was definitely a part of it, so I’m totally taking some of the credit.” “So you guys are living together now?” Lauren asks, cutting in as she puts a hand on Jack’s arm, in an attempt to steer the conversation away from this topic in case it reveals the true winner of their little pool on us. “Yep,” I reply at the same time as Penny says, “Uh huh.” Lauren glances at Ellen again as she murmurs. “So romantic.” I feel Pen shift in her seat next to me, leaning closer she puts a hand on my cheek and tells them all, “He really is.” “Babe,” I murmur, not loving the whole being the center of attention thing here. Pen glances up at me, a mischievous look on her face. “But enough , why don’t you guys fill me in on what Tommy was like in his younger days? I need all the dirt.”

Will chuckles, rubbing his hands together. “Oh yes, and do we have some dirt on him.” I scoff. “Please, like most of it doesn’t involve you, too.” Will shrugs a little, glancing over at Jack, who’s also grinning even though he doesn’t know half the shit Will and I got up to back when he and Ellen started dating and coming out to the winery. “Maybe,” he says, his grin widening. “But there was that time you fell in the pile of manure and got covered in shit.” “I did not fall in a pile of shit,” I reply. “You fucking pushed me, you and her,” I add, turning my glare toward Ellen, who’s sitting next to him. She tries to hide her laugh behind a hand as she replies. “Well, it wasn’t me who took your clothes when you were cleaning up in the outside shower.” “No.” I turn my attention to Lauren now, who’s also trying hard not to laugh. “That was someone else, wasn’t it?” “Will dared me!” she exclaims, as though the thought had never crossed her mind. “Sure he did,” I mutter as Pen laughs beside me. “Did you have to do a naked run through the winery?” she asks. “Yeah,” I say, my gaze moving from Lauren to Will and finally Ellen. “I did and of course it was right as their parents were coming out of the main building. I swear, I’ve never cupped my junk as fast as I did in that moment.” Will bursts out laughing. “Fuck yeah, I thought El’s mom was gonna have a heart attack when she saw you.” I smirk at him. “Yeah, no thanks to you assholes.” “How old were you when this happened?” Pen asks. I turn to her. “Maybe like twenty-two,” I reply with a shrug. “I mean, I’ve

obviously known their parents since I was a kid, but yeah, getting busted like that was awkward as fuck.” “Please,” Jack scoffs. “What about that impromptu buck’s party you guys organized for me, when all of us got our kit off and streaked through the grounds.” Pen bursts out laughing now. “Oh my god, yes, I that! Didn’t Oscar do it too?” Ellen chuckles. “He did yeah, he’s got massive FOMO, that kid, especially when it comes to these two,” she says gesturing to her husband and Jack. As everyone else starts laughing about that afternoon, Penny leans over so her mouth is against my ear. “I liking what I saw that day,” she whispers so only I can hear. I turn, my eyes meeting hers. “Oh yeah?” “Uh huh,” she murmurs, brushing her lips against mine. “Very much so.” I smile. “Well then, I’ll be sure to show you again when we get home.” The rest of the evening es, the six of us enjoying a relaxed and fun dinner together. It’s unreal how easy it is too. How it already feels like Pen’s a part of the group, as though she’s been here with me like this forever.

The next morning, I wake early as usual, the sun filtering in through the slats in the blinds. Pen sleeps soundly beside me, her cat curled up on the loveseat at the end of the bed that’s become his spot ever since he moved over here. I can’t help but smile as I take in the moment, the quiet stillness of my bedroom and the beautiful woman sleeping next to me. Never in a million years did I think we’d end up here like this and I still can’t believe it’s me Pen wants to be with. But as unbelievable as it is, I’m definitely done questioning it anymore. She stirs beside me, stretching her arms as she slowly blinks her eyes open. “Morning,” I whisper, leaning in to kiss her.

“Morning,” she replies, her voice husky with sleep. “I’ll make you some coffee,” I add, brushing the hair back from her face. She smiles up at me, her eyes closing briefly. “Thank you.” I slide out of bed, grabbing a pair of boxers from the floor and pulling them on before heading out to the kitchen. I’m just pouring the second cup when arms slide around my waist from behind and Pen rests her chin on my shoulder. “Thank you,” she says, kissing the side of my neck. I turn, kissing her lips. “Do you want something to eat?” Penny lifts the mug to her lips, shaking her head. “Maybe later,” she says, taking a sip of coffee. “Are we tasting the mead today?” I turn, leaning back against the counter as I drink my coffee. “I think we should, yeah.” Pen hops up onto one of the stools at the kitchen island, the t-shirt she’s pulled on riding up and exposing her thigh. She smirks at me when she catches me looking. “Think it’s going to be okay?” she asks. I chuckle. “God, who the fuck knows. I hope so.” I step closer, my hand now sliding up her thigh as I lean in and press a kiss to the top of her head. I don’t think I’m ever going to get used to mornings like this. “I think we’ll be good,” she says with a nod. I grin down at her. “And have you decided on a name for our mead?” Penny takes another sip of her coffee before putting the mug on the counter. Slipping her arms around my waist, she pulls me closer so I’m standing between her legs. “Yep.” I place my own coffee on the counter before wrapping my arms around her shoulders. “And?”

Pen’s smile widens as she leans closer and presses her lips to my bare chest, kissing and sucking my skin as a low groan falls from my mouth, my dick stirring. “Pen,” I murmur, my hands slipping beneath her t-shirt, fingers trailing a path up her spine. “Yes?” she whispers, chuckling a little. My hands slide down her back to her ass and I give it a squeeze. “The name?” She looks up at me, her chin resting against my chest, her eyes clouded with lust and want. “What do you think of P,T and Bee?” “P,T and Bee,” I repeat, already loving it. “Yeah. Do you like it?” I grin, slipping my hands under her ass now as I lift her from the stool. She squeals as she wraps her legs around my waist and her arms slip around my shoulders. “I fucking love it,” I tell her, walking her out of the kitchen and back to the bedroom.

Chapter Thirty-One

Penny

I can’t believe we’ve just named our business, a business that we created from scratch with basically no clue what we were doing. We’re just two people who never really had any set path, never finishing anything and letting everyone convince us we were just settling when we took jobs at a vineyard. But these jobs led us here, led us to each other and something about our connection motivated us to do more, to be more. Just two lost souls, wandering along until we found what felt right and everything and this place and what we’re doing feels so damn right. The two of us are now standing in the shed, back to once again staring at our mead production and wondering what the hell we are even doing. The high we were riding has now subsided and we’re back to being masters of none, confused as hell. “Do you think this is how all the great ones start?” I ask, breaking our silence, but still not saying what both of us are thinking. We’re fucking clueless! “I would think that most people have a bit more confidence than us, but maybe I’m wrong,” Tommy says, giving me a simple smile. “Why do you think we’re like this every time we walk into this shed?” I now prompt, hoping he has an answer that will suddenly create this newfound confidence in both of us. “Every time we walk into this shed, I pretty much just picture you naked and any thoughts I had about what I’m supposed to be doing go right out the window.” “Seriously, Tommy,” I chastise, my eyes narrowed at him. “I’m trying to have a serious conversation with you.” “Like I was the other night when you brought up that swinger couple?” he shoots

back, putting me in my place. I walk over to him and slide my fingers into the front of his jeans, pulling him closer to me. He instantly softens at my touch, his body melting against mine and I love how responsive he is when we’re close. I brush my lips along his, letting them linger for just a second before I murmur, “Tommy Andrews, I don’t think we’re meant for serious conversations.” His lips curl into a smile against my mouth and he laughs a little. I feel the tip of his tongue poke out and trace my bottom lip and goosebumps dot my skin instantly. “I think we’re meant for a lot of things that we don’t even realize,” he responds, his words soft, but so full of meaning. “Penny, we’ve been searching all this time, we just didn’t realize it.” “And I had no idea you were right here all along,” I tell him, kissing him gently. We can do this together. What’s the worst that can happen? The mead tastes like shit and we give up on it? That’s not that big of a disaster. We both have jobs we love, and we have each other, and our beautiful house and our crabby cat, we have the vineyard and the bees. We have Jack and Lauren who continue to be amazing to work for, and if this mead thing works out, it will just be an added bonus. “If we keep coming into this shed and making out there’s not a chance in hell anything will ever get done with this mead,” I tease, pushing away from him and moving over to where we have the five-gallon container. We ended up only doing two small batches in case it’s total crap, but I’m starting to come around to the idea that we’re pretty damn good at this. We managed to move the bees and create Melrose Hive without too much of an issue, unless you count Tommy getting stung constantly as an issue. We harvested honey and jarred it all without it crystalizing or going bad. Now we’ve produced mead and if things have gone the way of the past, this is going to turn out well, too. I hand Tommy a plastic cup, and the two of us stand there, taking in a deep

breath as he lets the spigot go and the mead flows into the cups. The pale amber liquid swirls in the cup and we both watch it in awe. It’s lighter than I thought it would be, more the color of hay than honey, and it smells a little musty, which we’ve read is good. “Bottoms up,” Tommy says, tapping his cup against mine and without wasting another second, we put back the mead. We swallow at the same time, my eyes focused on Tommy’s face, waiting for him to give any indication of what he thinks. I wait for him to shudder, for him to scrunch his eyes closed, for him to spit it out, but he doesn’t. And neither do I. “Oh my god, it’s good,” I cry out, tossing my empty cup in the air before I throw my arms around Tommy’s neck. His hands grab my ass as he lifts me off the ground and I wrap my legs around his waist. “Holy fucking shit, Penny,” Tommy calls out, burying his face in my neck. “I have no idea how we’ve gotten this lucky...” He doesn’t finish his thought, but he doesn’t need to. I feel it all too. It’s this crazy sense of excitement coursing through me, this sense of accomplishment and satisfaction and an overwhelming sense of pride. We did this together and with every step we find ourselves closer to being able to say we’ve created something entirely from scratch. “I don’t know if it’s luck,” I say, still wrapped in his arms, my forehead now resting against his. “I don’t know what it is, but I’m happy it’s all happening with you.” “I thought we didn’t do serious conversations and you’re turning sappy on me again, Pen,” he jokes, his hand giving my ass a squeeze. “Fine, I’m turning off the sappy part and calling Lauren and Jack to get their asses down here and taste this shit.” “Not just yet,” Tommy murmurs into the crook of my neck, sending a shiver down my spine. The way he smells and the way his hands feel on my body is something I never want to live without, and while I promised him I wasn’t going to get all soft on him again, I need to say it.

“I love you,” I blurt out, interrupting any continuation of what he planned to say to seduce me. He doesn’t even need to say anything more, because I’m never leaving his bed; I’m never leaving him. “I want to be with you forever.” My words come out quieter this time, each one said on a small breath of air that suddenly feels trapped in my lungs. “Forever?” he asks, pulling back to look at me and a deep feeling of panic washes over me, as if I’ve said too much. Like I let the moment carry me too far. I nod almost imperceptibly and then I wait. I wait for what feels like a lifetime, each rapid breath, each racing heartbeat. And then he says it, “I love you more than I can even begin to explain, Penny Cartwright.” My body sags against his and my chest tightens with the threat of tears. “You are everything I didn’t know I wanted.” “I thought we weren’t doing sappy anymore?” I ask, the tears now spilling down my cheeks, my words coming out a little ragged. “You’re the one who started it,” he teases, his mouth now on mine and I can’t help but take it further, slipping my tongue against his. There’s something about this damn shed that turns us into horny teenagers and I wouldn’t be surprised if at one point we find ourselves christening this place. “As much as I want to share the mead with Lauren and Jack, I need to get you home because if you think you can press your coochie against my dick and balls and walk away from me you’re wrong.” I wiggle around in his arms, his grip tightening as I try to scramble away from him. He’s a total shithead and there will never be a day that he lets me live that down. “Seriously? I tell you I love you and you bust out that time I embarrassed myself?” I feign being hurt and I rest my head on his shoulder. “It’s the day I knew I couldn’t live without you,” he its. “Even though I was a dick to you the next morning, I knew you were it for me. You’re the only girl who can make me laugh like this. You’re the only girl who I want to spend every day with. You’re it, Pen.”

He shrugs his shoulders casually as he finally sets me down. I’ve never wanted to spend every day with someone like I do with him. I’ve never lasted more than three months with anyone and while this whole thing is so new and intense and all consuming, it’s everything I hoped it would be and more. It’s okay to go all in when you know the other person feels the exact same way. I kiss him hard, practically bruising mine and his lips with the force, but I don’t care. We’re all tangled up in each other, this moment is pure and real and so fucking insane, but I love every second of it. “So, do you guys just come and make out in here?” a voice asks, startling both of us, but at least it’s not the twins this time. Dylan is standing in the entrance, an annoyed look on his face that I’m certain Tommy is mistaking for jealousy and silently patting himself on the back for landing me. I don’t think he realizes it wasn’t a competition, he was the only boy I wanted, but I won’t tell him that now. “What do you need, Dylan?” I ask, while Tommy nuzzles his nose into my hair and begins to whisper very, very dirty things into my ear. He isn’t playing fair right now. “Jack’s looking for Tommy. Needs him up by the cider house and Lu is looking for you. She’s in her office,” he says, matter-of-factly, letting out a huff as he waits for a response, his foot tapping slightly. “Okay, thanks, man,” Tommy bites out, looking at him over the top of my head. “Need anything else?” “Does everyone who works here just manage to find a kick ass girl? Am I the last one to have this magical thing happen to me?” he asks, looking around at the vineyard behind him. “Does the girl come to you? Is it the vineyard? Are Jack and Lauren expert matchmakers? What is it?” Tommy and I both laugh, but I don’t think it’s the answer Dylan is looking for. He’s right though. This place feels magical, like there’s something about it that connects people; a strange pull toward the things they belong with. “Hang tight, Dylan,” I say, smiling at him. “Something will come your way.”

“Damn well better because I don’t think I can work here with everyone making out and all fucking happy.” He has Tommy and I laughing again as he storms off into the rows of grapevines behind him. “He’s really fucking unpleasant,” Tommy chides, shooting a sour face in Dylan’s direction and I cock my head to the side, furrowing my brows. “Really? I someone who was very much like that not so long ago.” I pat my hand on Tommy’s chest, looking up at him and waiting for his response. “He needs to get laid,” Tommy now says, nodding as if he’s a damn expert. “Changed my whole life.” His words are laced with playful sarcasm and I can’t help but tease him right back. “So that’s all I am? Just a good lay?” “No, babe. You have a nice set of tits too.”

Chapter Thirty-Two

Tommy

“You cheeky shit,” Penny says, laughing as she slaps me on the chest. “What? It’s the truth,” I reply, feigning surprise. “Anyway, as much as I’d love to continue talking about your tits and getting laid, I guess we need to go and see what Jack and Lauren want?” Pen smirks, pinching my side as she says, “Yeah, I guess so. You wanna bring them both down here afterward for a taste?” “There’s certainly something I’d like a taste of,” I murmur, grabbing her boob for a quick squeeze. “Tommy!” she laughs, even as she leans into me, her body clearly wanting more right now. I smile as I press a quick kiss to her lips. “We can pick this back up afterward too.” Penny smacks me on the ass, laughing as she says, “Sounds good.” We both head outside, Pen walking in one direction over to Lauren’s office and me in the other as I make my way over to Apple Jacks. When I reach the cider house, Jack is in the front bar area, stacking tasting notes and brochures as he prepares for the opening in a couple of weeks. “Hey, you wanted to see me?” I ask, walking inside. Jack looks up, a huge grin on his face. “Wow, that was fast.” “What?” I ask, confused. “Dylan told me he busted you and Pen going at it in the shed. I figured it would be at least, what, thirty minutes,” he pauses as he checks his watch, “before you showed up here. No issues with performance or premature—”

“Dylan needs to mind his own business,” I growl, cutting Jack off as I look around for the little shit. Jack bursts out laughing. “Welcome to my world, mate. You wouldn’t believe the number of times Lu and I got busted around here when we first started.” I scoff. “Ah, yeah I would, Jack. I busted you often enough, still fucking do actually.” “Whatever,” he says, a smug grin on his face because he knows it’s the truth. He and Lauren are fucking hopeless, still all over each other every chance they get. Still, given recent events, I’m not sure me and Pen are that different. “So, what’s up?” I ask, reminding him again that he wanted to see me. Jack nods, throwing a towel over his shoulder as he walks toward me. “We finally got those outdoor heaters and lights delivered, just wondered if you could help me set them up for the opening.” “Sure thing,” I reply, following him to the outdoor area. “And when we’re done, you should come down to the shed and taste the mead Pen and I made.” “Oh yeah?” Jack asks, glancing back at me. “It’s ready?” “It is,” I reply with a nod. “That’s what we were doing in the shed.” Jack chuckles. “Sure you were.” I roll my eyes at him as we start to get the delivery unpacked.

Couple of hours later and we are done, so I text Pen to let her know we are on our way back to the shed so I can show Jack the mead. She replies to let me know that she’ll bring Lauren down and by the time Jack and I get there, the girls are already waiting for us. “This is so exciting,” Lauren says, clapping her hands and smiling as Jack and I walk in.

I grin, feeling kind of excited myself. Even though I’ve worked at Somerville’s for most of my life, helping out with growing the grapes and making wine, and now cider at Apple Jacks, none of it has really felt like my own success. And while I don’t begrudge Jack or Lauren any of theirs, it’s nice to know Pen and I have been able to achieve something too and maybe contribute in some small way to just how awesome this place is. Dylan was right about one thing, there’s definitely something magical here at Somerville’s “Ok, cups,” Pen says, handing everyone a plastic cup. I fill my cup and then hand it to Lauren, taking hers and doing the same for Jack, Pen and then me. The four of us stand in a small circle, looking at each other as we all tap our cups together and Jack and Lauren taste theirs. Pen and I wait this time, watching their faces as they drink what we’ve created. They both swallow it in one gulp and almost immediately Lauren’s face lights up, as a wide grin breaks out. “Holy shit, this is awesome,” she says, handing me the cup as she asks for a refill. I turn to Jack, who’s also smiling. “Fuck yeah it is and we can totally use this in a Christmas cider special too.” “Really?” I ask, thinking for sure he’d be giving us shit in some form. “Hell yeah,” he says, refilling his cup. “Like a spicy, honey, fruit cider, it’ll be fucking awesome.” “Have you guys got a name?” Lauren asks, sipping her second cup. “A logo? A branding plan? An Insta page?” “Whoa, settle down,” I say, holding up a hand as Pen laughs beside me. “We literally only just discovered this shit actually tasted good.” “Yeah and they spend half their time in this shed getting naked,” Jack chimes in.

I roll my eyes, even as Pen pulls out her phone to show Lauren the Instagram page she’s created for P,T and Bee. We spend the next half hour or so drinking some more mead and making plans for how we are going to sell it and the other recipes we want to try. Lauren and Jack are both ive of all of our ideas and by the time we are done, it’s late and the four of us are more than a little buzzed. “Packs a punch,” Jack says, smiling as he throws an arm around Lauren’s shoulders and pulls her close. “Come on Lulu, I think you and I need to go and naked ourselves,” he says, giving us a smug grin. Lauren smacks him on the stomach, but she’s smiling and it’s obvious that’s exactly what’s going to happen when they get home. We head outside to find the sun just setting, the winery now closed. The four of us say goodbye before Pen and I walk over to my truck to head home and also hopefully get naked. Just as we’re driving past the small dirt road that leads to the middle of the vineyard though, Pen holds up a hand and says, “Wait, turn down here.” I shoot her a confused look. “What, why?” She giggles. “I wanna show you something.” Smiling, I ask, “Something dirty?” She laughs now, sliding her hand up my thigh. “Maybe.” “Well, in that case,” I reply, making the turn. We follow the narrow track all the way to the middle of the grapevines, which I now surround a small lake. It’s not really functional and is rarely used as a water source, but it’s been here for as long as I can . “Here?” I ask, killing the ignition as I look around at the quiet and secluded spot. “Yep, here,” Pen confirms, reaching into the back seat for a blanket that’s stashed there before hopping out of the truck.

I follow after her, watching as she kicks off her shoes and spreads the blanket out on the grass beside the pond, before sitting down. I do the same, and turn to her asking, “So, what’s so special about this place then.” Pen smiles as she stretches her legs out in front of her and rests back on her elbows. “It’s my favorite place here at Somerville’s.” “I thought our house was your most favorite place?” I ask, an indignant tone in my voice. Pen laughs, falling onto her back as she looks up at me. “Okay, this is my second favorite place.” “Better,” I whisper as I lean down to brush my lips against hers, suddenly getting a very good idea for just what we can do in this quiet secluded place of hers, especially now it’s almost dark. “Now, about what we were discussing back in the shed earlier…” “Hmmm,” she murmurs, arching her neck to give me better access as I kiss a slow path up her neck to her ear. My hand slips under her t-shirt, pushing it up and over her head until I eventually get it off. “So fucking beautiful,” I breathe, smoothing my hand between her breasts, her nipples already hard in the cool evening air. “What are you doing?” Pen whispers as my mouth finds a nipple, sucking on the hardened peak through the lace of her bra. I smile against her, gently biting before I lift my mouth to her ear. “I wanna stick my tongue inside you, Penny,” I whisper. “I wanna lick you and taste you and make you come with my mouth.” These are the exact words I whispered to her back in the shed, only this time, she’s not distracted by anything or anyone, instead letting out a loud groan as my hand snakes under her back and unclips her bra. She doesn’t protest when I pull it off, in fact her hands pull at my t-shirt now, yanking it off before she trails her fingers down my chest to my jeans. She manages to get the top button undone before I pull her hands away, laughing as she pouts.

“Me first,” I grin, pinning her hands above her head. Shifting so I’m straddling her hips now, I undo her jeans, pulling them down her legs so she’s lying beneath me in nothing but her panties. She looks up at me, her eyes hooded with lust as one of her hands now moves to my dick, cupping and stroking my obvious hard-on through my jeans. “Fuck, baby,” I groan, loving the way she touches me. I look down, watch as her fingers slip inside, gripping my shaft and slowly stroking me. As good as this feels though, there’s something I want to do first. Ignoring her protests, I pull her hand from my boxers, shuffling back a little as I slowly pull her panties down her legs. She bends her knees to help me and when she’s eventually completely naked, I sit back on my heels to ire the view, grateful I left the headlights on. Grinning, I meet her gaze, waiting till her eyes lock with mine before I slowly lick my lips. Pen groans, her legs falling open as I smooth my hands up her thighs and lower my mouth to her. “Oh shit, Tommy,” she cries out the second I touch her, her hips bowing off the blanket as she pushes against me. With a hand on her hip, I push her down, holding her there as I slowly start to tease and torment her with my tongue and fingers. Pen thrashes beneath me, her cries loud in the quiet of the field as she begs me to keep going, to push harder, faster. But every time she’s close, I slow down, pulling back just a little so as to keep her on the edge, but not quite falling over it. Eventually though, she grows frustrated and I feel her hand slide into my hair, her fingers gripping tightly as she holds me against her, practically pushing my face against her hot warmth. Smiling, I give her what she wants now, licking and sucking until she’s crying out my name into the evening. As she lies spent on the blanket, I quickly push off my boxers and jeans, before crawling up her body and pushing inside her. She’s still shuddering from her orgasm and I can feel her gripping me tightly as I slowly slide inside. “You are so wet, Pen,” I whisper, kissing her. She smiles, tasting herself on my lips. “So are you.”

I grin. “And so fucking sweet, too.” Pen’s hands move to my chest and she shoves me over, following me so it’s now me lying on my back and her straddling my hips. “My turn,” she says, a wickedly sexy smile on her face. And then she proceeds to return the favor, riding me slowly, pushing me closer and closer to the edge until I’m about to come, before pulling back just enough to stop me. It’s both torturous and so fucking good all at the same time, that I never want it to end. And as I grip her hips, watching her move above me, I can’t help but think again how goddamn lucky I am. Eventually, my grip tightens, my fingers digging into her skin as I take over, moving her body at the pace I need to finally find my release. Pen grins down at me, slipping a hand between her legs as she starts to get herself off at the same time. It doesn’t take either of us long before we are both calling out into the night, coming hard together before Pen collapses onto my chest, our breath heaving and our hearts pounding. “God, I love your dirty mouth,” Pen eventually whispers, her head resting on my shoulder. I chuckle. “And I love your dirty little pond secret.” Pen laughs, pinching my ass as she says, “It’s not my dirty little pond secret. I used to come down here alone.” “Oh yeah,” I ask, teasing her. “And you didn’t ever rub one out while you were out here?” “Ugh,” Pen scoffs as she props herself up on her elbow. “Dirty perv, you’d love it if I did that, wouldn’t you?” I grin, smoothing the hair back from her face. “Well yeah, of course. It’s kinda hot, but honestly, I’d much rather be down here helping you out.” Penny leans down to brush her lips against mine. “So would I.”

“Which reminds me,” I say, sitting up. “Seeing as we are here and we’re naked, there’s one other thing we should do.” I stand, pulling Pen up and throwing her over my shoulder. She squeals, slapping my bare ass as she cries, “Tommy, what the hell are you doing?” “We’re going skinny dipping,” I say, smoothing a palm over her butt before giving it a quick smack. “NO!” she yells. “It’s freezing!” “It’s not that bad,” I say, walking us down to the pond. “Holy fuck, it’s freezing,” I cry out as soon as my foot hits the water. I don’t stop though, forcing myself to keep going even as the water gets higher. “Oh my god, you shit,” Penny cries, half laughing when I’m waist deep and her feet now touch the water. I smack her ass again, laughing as I pull her over my shoulder so she’s standing facing me. She attempts to glare at me, wrapping her arms around her waist as goosebumps dot her skin and her nipples stand at full salute. “See, it’s not that bad,” I say, reaching over to pinch one of them. She gasps, smacking my hand out of the way. “It’s fucking freezing. Seriously, how can you—” The rest of what she’s about to say is cut off as I slide my other hand around her waist and haul her against me. “Then how about you come over here and let me warm you up?” I whisper before crushing my mouth against hers. The kiss is hard and deep, our tongues tangling together as Penny’s arms wrap around my neck and our bodies push against each other. I slip my hands to her ass, squeezing before lifting her and wrapping her legs around my waist. She gasps when she realizes how much I am not affected by the cold water right now. “Oh my god, you’re already hard,” she whispers, pulling back a little.

I grin nipping at her bottom lip. “I’m always hard around you, Pen,” I reply. “Now come here.”

Chapter Thirty-Three

Penny

We’re lying in bed the next morning, both of us up early, and knowing we have to get to work. One of the best parts about living with Tommy is that my job is literally a five-minute walk from my house. It’s also hella hard to leave this bed with Tommy’s naked ass lying next to me, his body warm and smelling of fresh cut wood, and he’s always ready and I’m always insatiable. I can’t get enough of him. And now he’s made my pond that I love so much at Somerville’s an even better place. The memory of our tryst is burned into my brain. I move closer to him, a leg and arm strewn over his body as he lies with his eyes closed still. “Good morning,” I whisper, peppering his chest with soft kisses. “What time do you start today?” “Mmmm,” he groans, rolling onto his side and burying his face in my hair. “Why do you smell so good?” “I don’t know, but you didn’t answer my question,” I tease as his hand slips over my breast, his fingers finding my nipple. I cover it with mine, stilling him, and causing him to groan out loud again. “Why are you stopping me?” he questions, whining a little. “Because we both have to get to work and we’re already making out all over this damn place.” “I guess you’re right, but we do have like an hour before I have to be out there. An hour is plenty of time. Really, I only need like five minutes, if we’re being honest,” he jokes, but there’s no way he’d be done in five minutes and not be ready to go again seconds later. “What were you going to school for?” I ask him, seemingly out of nowhere, but

it’s been something I’ve wondered about for a while. I Lauren and Ellen talking about how they were worried Tommy would leave and eventually return to school. That he seemed to have grown bored working here, but a part of me wonders if it was just that he was lonely. “That’s a strange question,” he replies, chuckling. “I know, but I was curious because you’ve always just worked here at the vineyard, but you did make the decision to leave and go away to school.” “I was majoring in chemical engineering,” he its, saying it like it’s no big deal, like he’s just announced he’s going to get the mail. “Wait, what?” I’m taken aback and I have no idea why. I guess I just didn’t expect he would be that intense. I should’ve known though, he’s intense about everything. “Wow, that’s fucking impressive.” “Don’t be too impressed. I smoked way too much weed and only made it a year before I came home.” He’s far too modest because he’s probably one of the smartest people I know, but he’d never dare project that out to the world. He’s quiet and reserved and there’s just something about him that draws me to him. “Do you ever think about going back?” He laughs, shifting so he’s looking at me. “Penny, I’m thirty-four years old. I’m too fucking old to look back now. And besides, I like it here. I enjoy my job and the ease and simplicity of it. It’s low stress and at the end of the day, I come back to my house and I can just unwind without worrying about what tomorrow holds.” How in the hell has this guy been right here under my nose all this time? He’s literally all I’ve ever wanted, low key and happy with life. “God, you’re fucking perfect,” I wail, throwing myself on top of him. “How about you?” he now asks, tucking my hair behind my ears with his fingers. “Would you consider going back to school? Maybe leaving

Somerville’s?” There’s a hesitation in what he says, his words catching in his throat. “Never. Not now, not ever,” I whisper back, leaning down to kiss him, our lips smiling against each other.

An hour later we’ve gone our separate ways with Tommy heading over to finish some last minute set up at the cider house and me walking into the still quiet tasting room. Today is the last day of the giveaway entries for the invitation only celebration at Apple Jacks and Lauren and Ellen did an excessive amount of advertising. The place is going to be packed today. I pull up the schedule to see what reservations we have already, and I look over everything wondering if we’ll even be able to accommodate the rush of people we all know will be coming. You literally can’t walk down the street in Napa and not see something advertising the opening of Apple Jacks or the contest going on at Somerville’s right now. As I’m scrolling through the reservations, I notice a familiar name, stopping on it, I look it over again. They’re the first booking, right at the top. It’s the threesome swingers couple. Just as I’m contemplating it all, one of the other girls who works in the tasting room walks in for her shift. “Hey Penny,” she calls out, stashing her purse in the small safe we keep behind the counter. “How’s it going? Yesterday was packed. Guessing today will be the same.” “Hey, Brit?” I say, a question on the end of my words. “You recognize this couple’s name?” I turn the computer screen so it’s now facing her. “Oh, yeah. They were in here yesterday. They were looking for you and I told them you worked today. I made the reservation for them. How come?” “I don’t know. They were in here a few weeks back and asked for me then too.”

As much as the whole threesome swingers thing was a joke, I find it odd that they’re back for a third time and looking only for me. What could they possibly want? While they seemed to have a hearty interest in my wine knowledge, they also asked a lot of questions about me personally. “Maybe they just like you. Did they do any cider tasting? Maybe they’re buttering you up hoping you pick them as one of the winners,” Brit suggests, shrugging her shoulders as she walks off to grab a tray of glasses. I guess I never even thought about that. We are giving away a pricy package to several people and everyone loves free shit. It was pretty stupid and selfcentered of me to think they’re interested in me. I laugh a little, shaking my head at my own stupidity. Of course it’s the giveaway that has brought them back several times. We have no limit on the number of entries; it’s just one per day. I quickly get back to making sure all of the wine is stocked and we have plenty of cider on tap for the samples, when a soft knock comes on the entry door to the tasting room. I walk over to the door and find the older couple standing outside, about fifteen minutes early for their reservation. Generally, I wouldn’t open up early, but for some reason I decide to let them in. “Hi Penny,” the older gentleman says when I open the door. “It’s great to see you again. I know we’re early, but we’d like a chance to talk to you before the place gets too busy.” I nod, looking around the empty tasting room and wondering where Brit has flitted off to. I could use her right about now. I do know Lauren is in her office, which is only a scream away should I need her. I watch way too much TV because I’ve gone from thinking this old guy wants to bring me into his harem to thinking he and his sweet little wife want to kill me. “Come on in,” I respond, stepping aside and holding the door open for them. Both walk over to the bar and sit down, while I make my way back behind it. I feel like a barrier might be good.

Why am I so weird? It’s probably something so stupid that I’ll be laughing about it tonight with Tommy. “So, my name is Albert Timmons and this is my wife Elaine. We live up near Seattle,” he starts. “A small island, only about 900 people, but it’s quiet and beautiful.” Why is he telling me this? I wait though, letting him finish his thought. “We’ve lived there for about, well...” he pauses looking over at Elaine who gives him a sweet smile. “It’s been about thirty-six years,” she adds, finishing his sentence. “How long have you been here again?” “I started working at Somerville’s a couple of years ago. I came from Massachusetts to find something different and I certainly found it here.” I return her smile, realizing how much I appreciate being here and how I can’t picture my life anywhere else now. “That’s wonderful,” Elaine says, her hand resting on Albert’s arm. “We came from New York out to Washington almost forty years ago and we never looked back.” “I know you’re early, but is there a wine I can grab for you? You might as well enjoy the quiet in here and have a little wine,” I offer, settling down now that I know they aren’t here to murder me or get me in the sack. “That would be great, but that’s not what we’re here for today,” Albert says, again looking over at his wife. They both seem to be more uncomfortable than when they first walked in here. “We were wondering if it would be possible to be guests at the opening of the cider house here at the vineyard?” he finally its, coming right out with it now. And there it is. People wanting free shit and trying to butter me up to get it. I try not to let my face tell what I’m thinking, but I’m certain the way I close my eyes a little too slowly is giving me away.

“So, it is invitation only since it’s not open to the public and we are running the giveaway, but I’ll see what I can do,” I reply, lying because I know I just can’t invite these people off the street to the soft opening. Not only that, but it’s pretty shitty of them to come in here and try to act like they’re interested in me just to get free food and drinks in the end. “I’m not certain we’re conveying what we’re asking very well,” Elaine now says. “Let me see if I can explain this better.” She takes in a long slow breath and gives her husband a knowing glance. They stay silent for a few seconds too long and I begin to wonder if I shouldn’t give Lauren a call. “Like we said, we’ve been living in Washington for a while now, a long time actually. We own a vineyard and we’ve been running it on our own for the last thirty-six years, but we’re getting old and it’s not feasible for us to continue. So essentially what we’re asking is if you would like to take over our vineyard? Run things for us? We understand the commitment that it would take, but we are willing to make you a substantial offer,” she closes, just as her husband slides a piece of paper across the bar to me. And when I open the small slip, I gasp out loud. “Um, are you sure?” I choke out, the words caught in my throat, all air has now escaped my lungs. “Yes, we’re sure. We’ve spent a great deal of time deciding what’s important to us and getting to relax and retire is one of them, but we can’t do that without either selling the vineyard or having someone take over,” Albert states with certainty. “Don’t you have kids? Family who would want to take on this job? I’m just some girl from Massachusetts who fell into this job,” I say, panicked at how to respond. “This is a lot of money. Like is this the amount you’re offering me to do this job forever?” They both laugh now, clearly amused by my naiveté, but I’m dead serious. I haven’t seen a number this big ever. I make a decent living here at Somerville’s, enough to afford the things I want and now that I’m living with Tommy...”

Tommy...

Chapter Thirty-Four

Tommy

My day is busy with all the last- minute things we have to do to get ready for the Apple Jacks party. Even though it’s the end of summer, the beautiful weather is hanging around, which means the winery is full of people and the tasting room booked solid. Pen had mentioned this morning that she’d be stuck there all day and as much as I’d love to go and help her out, I have a long list of things to do myself. Before I get started on any of it though, I head over to the hives to check on our bees. With everything going well with the first batch of mead, we’re going to need more honey for the next lot. As I gather up the puffer and stupid hat I’m forced to wear because the little fuckers insist on stinging me every time I come to look in on them, I can’t help but smile at just how perfect everything is these days. To think only weeks ago, Jack was installing that stupid app on my phone and telling me I needed to get laid. And while the app might have helped with the whole getting together with Penny thing, and he may also have been right about me needing to get laid, there’s not a chance in hell I was ever going to it that to him. Now, here I am, living with Pen, having finally itting how I feel about her, having her feel the same way about me, and both of us working in jobs we love with a new project that just might take off for us. “Hey, Tommy!” I turn to see Dylan walking toward me. “Hey,” I reply. He stops a few feet away, warily watching the bees which are buzzing around now I’ve lifted one of the lids. “Is it safe?” I chuckle. “Maybe. Depends on how feisty these little fuckers are feeling. I seem to get stung every damn time I’m here but Pen not so much.”

Dylan laughs, taking another step back as I lift out one of the racks from inside the hive. “Wow, is that all honey?” he asks. “Yep,” I say with a nod. “It’s our second batch too.” “Huh, where’d you guys learn to do all this?” I slide the rack back into the hive, replacing the lid before moving onto the next one to check the honey production. “Google,” I reply with a smirk. “Seriously?” “Yeah, we are totally winging it with Google and YouTube. Honestly, we don’t really know what we’re doing.” “Clearly it’s working,” Dylan says. “Jack said the mead he tasted last night was pretty damn good.” I’m grateful for this stupid netted hat I’m wearing so Dylan can’t see the smile that forms at hearing Jack’s compliment. Even though he and Lauren had told us it was good last night, the fact that he’s also telling others about it is a good sign. “Yeah,” I reply, not wanting to let on. “Anyway, what can I do for you, Dylan?” He gives me a sheepish look as he slides his hands into the pockets of his jeans, rocking on his heels a little, but says nothing, almost as though he’s nervous about whatever it is he’s come to talk to me about. Exhaling, I lower the lid of the hive and walk over to him, pulling off the hat. “Come on, spit it out.” “Soooo…” he starts, dragging out the word. “So,” I repeat back, lifting a brow in question. “Look, about Penny,” he starts, lifting a hand when I open my mouth to speak. “I know you think I’m interested in her, but I’m not, I promise.” He looks nervous as shit as he tells me this and a part of me wants to kick his ass for even thinking anything about Penny. But I don’t, mentally reminding myself

that it’s me Pen lives with. “Is that right?” “Yeah, it is,” he says. “I know I flirt with her and shit, but I promise you it’s just for fun, you know?” “Hmmm,” I reply, crossing my arms over my chest. “I swear,” he says, hands up in surrender. “Okay,” I eventually say, his face visibly relaxing at my acknowledgement. “And you’re telling me this why?” Dylan motions back toward the cider house and we slowly start walking back as he continues to talk. “I don’t want to create any trouble, that’s all. I know I’m only new, but I really like it here and I don’t want to jeopardize my job or whatever by pissing you off.” I chuckle. “Good to know.” “And,” he continues. “I’m actually sorta interested in someone else.” “Actually sorta interested,” I say with a laugh. “You don’t sound too certain there, Dylan.” He exhales, brushing a hand across the scuff on his face. I can’t tell if he’s actually trying to grow a beard or he’s just too lazy to shave. I mean I can be too, but I don’t let it get that long. “It’s complicated,” he eventually its. “Complicated how?” I ask, wondering how it is that we’ve suddenly fallen into some kind of relationship counselling session here. I glance at him and notice he’s blushing a little. A laugh falls from me before I can stop it. “Jesus, you haven’t gone and knocked someone up, have you?” “No, no, nothing like that,” he says, shaking his head. “I was seeing this girl, well seeing her isn’t the right word.”

“You were fucking her?” I suggest. “Yeah,” he says, giving me a wry smile. “Fuck buddies?” “Something like that,” he says with a nod. “And?” I ask, waving my hand in front of me, as if to tell him to continue. Dylan runs a hand through his hair as he stares straight ahead. “And she wanted more, but I didn’t, so she stopped answering my texts and now she doesn’t wanna hook up anymore and I…I think, fuck…” “You think you’ve made a huge mistake?” I suggest. Dylan shrugs. “Something like that, yeah.” I laugh, wondering why the hell he’s felt the need to tell me all of this and what he expects me to say in return. It’s not like I’m an expert in relationships by any means. I mean I’m fucking lucky to have landed Penny, but god knows I nearly fucked that up the first time we hooked up. “What?” Dylan says, interrupting my train of thought. “You’re thinking I’m an idiot right now, aren’t you?” I chuckle. “Actually, I’m wondering why the hell you’ve told me all of this?” “I don’t know,” he says, throwing his hands up in the air. “You landed Penny, she’s a catch and you’re like…you know.” I stop, turning to face him, brows raised in question. “I’m like what exactly?” Dylan looks at his feet as he mumbles. “You know, old and I dunno, kinda permanently pissed off.” I burst out laughing, throwing my head back as Dylan looks up at me in surprise. “Oh Jesus Christ,” I say, shaking my head as I scrub a hand down my face. “First up, I’m not that old Dylan, but thanks for thinking I’m some dirty perv sugar daddy who’s after a much younger girl.”

“No, that’s not—” “It’s cool,” I say, cutting him off. “And I’m not permanently pissed off either. Yeah, I work hard and expect others to do the same, but I’m not pissed off.” “But when we first met,” he says. “I was pissed because I thought you were after Penny,” I explain. “But you guys weren’t even together then, were you?” “No, but it didn’t mean I wanted anyone else to go after her,” I say, realizing how stupid that sounds. “But enough about me, what do you wanna do about this girl of yours?” “She’s not mine,” he mumbles. “And she won’t even talk to me anymore.” We start walking again, making our way to the cider house. “Well, I guess you’re gonna have to turn on the charm to try and win her back, aren’t you?” Dylan groans. “Fuck, that’s exactly what I need to know how to do.” I laugh, shaking my head at how pathetic he is, even knowing I was hardly much better.

I spend the rest of the day at the cider house, stringing up fairy lights, rearranging furniture and getting the bar stocked for the opening. By the time I’m done, it’s late and I wander back over to the winery, hoping to catch Pen so we can head home together. She’s in the middle of cleaning up when I walk into the tasting room, her back to me as she hangs the clean wine glasses in the overhead rack. “Hey, baby,” I whisper, slipping my arms around her waist. She jumps in surprise, making me laugh as she turns her face to mine. “Hi,” she says. I lean in and give her a hard kiss, the faintest taste of wine on her lips.

Pen’s face is flushed when I pull back and I can’t resist kissing her again, loving that I can affect her like this. “What can I do to help?” I ask, finally letting her go. She waves me away. “I’m good, I’m nearly done,” she says. “I can just meet you at home if you want.” “Don’t be silly,” I say, my hand on her hip. “Let me help and then we can both head home, maybe take a long hot bath together,” I add. “Sure, sounds good,” Pen says, turning away. Given Pen’s love of our bathroom, her reaction to my suggestion feels a little off. “Hey, you okay?” I ask. She looks at me quickly. “Yeah, just a long day. Tired.” “So let me help,” I reply, gently squeezing her hip. “Okay,” she says, exhaling. “You wanna mop the floor for me?” We spend the next thirty minutes cleaning the tasting room. We don’t talk much more and I try to ignore the weird vibe that suddenly seems to have come between us. When everything is done, I hold my hand out to Pen, smiling when she slips hers into mine and we walk out to my truck. We spend the short drive home in silence and when we walk inside, she heads straight to the kitchen. I follow her in, watching as she opens the wine fridge and grabs a bottle of chardonnay. Holding it up to me, she silently asks if I want a glass. I nod, somehow feeling like I’m going to need one. She pours us both a glass, sliding one toward me. I take it, lifting to tap against hers, but she stalls out, not lifting hers. “Penny, what’s going on?” I ask, moving around to where she’s standing. She exhales before taking a large sip of wine. I watch her, searching her face for any sign of what it is that’s bothering her right now.

“That old couple came into the tasting room again today.” I smile. “Oh, they finally hit on you? ‘Cause I’m happy to let them know I don’t share—” “They offered me a job,” she says, cutting me off. “What?” I ask, my heart suddenly thumping behind my ribs. She reaches for her bag, pulling a slip of paper from it that she opens and places on the counter between us. I glance down at it, see the familiar name and logo of a famous winery somewhere in Washington. Below that is a number, a very large number with a dollar sign in front of it. “What’s this?” I ask, a knot forming in my stomach as I look back up at Pen. She swallows hard, her eyes locked with mine as she says, “It’s what they offered me to move up there and run their winery.”

Chapter Thirty- Five

Penny

The number has more zeros behind it than I’ve ever seen in my entire life. I get that these people have done well for themselves, but well enough to pay me a half a million dollars a year to run their winery and vineyard? The skeptical part of me is thinking this whole thing is a fucking scam. Tommy’s eyes widen when I tell him it’s what they’ve offered me to move up to Washington and run their place. “That’s a lot of fucking money,” he finally responds, quietly, and my heart breaks into a million pieces. I don’t want to leave him, but I also told myself that I was done doing things that make guys happy. Tommy isn’t just any guy though and our current situation is much different than anything I’ve ever been in. I love him and we’ve started a business together, granted it’s just started and literally hasn’t moved beyond the confines of a damn shed, but still. Maybe I’m just making excuses. But I’m not. Lauren and Ellen have been so good to me. Hiring me when I had no idea what I was doing, giving me an awesome job and the opportunity to learn as I worked. They’ve allowed Tommy and me to raise bees and make mead and create a small business on their dollar. Why the hell would I walk away from this? Because I’d be stupid not to take a job that pays more than I’ll probably see in my lifetime. It’s probably more than Tommy would see in his lifetime. But what if the mead business takes off and we find ourselves doing well? Fuck my life and all these fucking questions.

I pull a hand through my hair, my thoughts swirling in a million directions making me feel like I might burst into tears. “It is a lot of fucking money, but that’s no reason to move three states away,” I it, wondering if he’ll ask me to stay. “It’s every reason to move. It’s every reason to at least give it a good hard thought,” he pauses, looking down at the piece of paper lying between us. “I’m not going to ask you to stay,” he finally its and again my heart shatters more than I ever thought possible. “I want you to,” I childishly demand, my words coming out in a desperate whine. I hate how I sound. “Penny,” he says, stepping closer to me, and reaching out to wrap me in his arms. The second his hands touch my body, I collapse against him, unable to stop the tears. The way he says my name, the smell and warmth of his body would normally bring me so much comfort, but today it’s just a reminder that this may be the last time I’m like this with him. That I get to find this solace, this peace he has brought me. “Come with me,” I wail, my words louder than I want, but desperate to be heard. “Since you won’t tell me to stay, come with me.” He’s worked here all his life and what I’ve just asked him is completely shitty of me. Completely selfish and based on the fact that I can’t make a decision. I also know it’s the reason his last relationship ended. She wanted more than just this vineyard. I told him I would never leave. That this place would always be enough for me, and maybe it still is. Maybe my judgement is clouded by a dollar sign, money that I don’t really need, money that I’ve never needed. Or maybe it’s more than the money. It would give me something to be proud of, something to call my own. But is it really mine if it was created by someone else? Fuck my life.

“I can’t,” he finally answers, and it almost makes me angry. He doesn’t even say he might come with me or that he’ll think about it, even if he ultimately knows his answer is no. “I own a portion of Somerville’s. I can’t walk out on Ellen and Lauren.” “Wait. What?” I respond, pushing away from him slightly. This is a new revelation. “What do you mean you own a portion? Why are you just telling me this now?” I’m trying not to sound indignant and hurt but I’m failing miserably. It feels like he kept this in his back pocket just in case I decided to bail. He’d have this backup plan of always having the vineyard and I’d be left in the dust, possibly jobless. I swipe a hand under my eyes, wiping away any semblance of tears in the hopes that I don’t look so desperate now. “So when were you going to tell me?” I shoot, adding to my anger. “I just told you now,” he responds, acting far too casual about it. “Whatever is mine is yours, Penny. I thought you knew that.” “Okay, the ‘I just told you now’ is complete shit and you know it. You kept it from me on purpose. And now you’re using it as an excuse to not come with me or to make me stay or whatever,” I shout, my arms now crossed over my chest, angry at him, at the world, at myself. “Penny, baby,” he says, sympathy falling from each word, reaching for me. “Come here.” “I’m sorry, but I can’t. Not right now. I need… I need a few minutes to figure shit out,” I tell him, walking away and out the front door. It slams behind me, not intentionally or maybe intentionally, I don’t know at this point. All I know is I feel lost and out of control, something I’ve avoided for so long. It’s the reason I vowed to stay out of a relationship, it’s the reason I told myself not to fall in love. I head to the lake, the one place that has always held the quiet I’m now seeking, but when I get there all I can picture is Tommy.

He’s ruined my lake! I’m being so dramatic, but I don’t care. I’m sure it’s a simple decision and I’m making it out to be this epic fucking disaster. Either I take the job, or I don’t. But then my brain begins to yell at me, reminding me that this isn’t just a simple decision. If I stay, am I doing it for a guy? Am I doing the one thing I told myself to not do? But then if I stay, am I giving up something that could’ve changed my life? I flop down on the bench and let myself cry. The tears are falling hard and fast, and I’m taking in big gulps of air when I hear someone say my name. “Penny?” the distant voice questions, testing it out to see if the hot mess of tears and wild hair is actually me. I swallow hard, again wiping away the tears as I turn around and come face to face with Lauren. “Hey Lauren. How’s it going?” I ask, as if I’m not sitting here sobbing my eyes out. “What’s going on?” she asks, sympathetically, as she sits down next to me. “You okay?” “Obviously I’m not okay,” I joke, smiling through the tears. “What’s going on?” And then she hesitantly adds, “Something with Tommy?” They’ve been friends since they were kids and she’s my boss. I can’t talk to her about him or the fact that I’ve been offered a new job. This is a complete disaster. “When did Tommy buy into this place?” I ask, keeping it away from my new job or the fact that I’m on the verge of a breakup. Even if what I’ve asked is probably more intrusive in the end. “Oh, shit, it’s probably been ten years at least. It was when Ellen and I took over. We needed a partner because we knew Ellen was going to be having kids soon

and I couldn’t take on everything myself. He only owns ten percent, but before Jack came, he was in charge of all the maintenance on the property.” I nod, but what she said has done nothing to appease my fears or my anxiety over the situation, because in the end, Tommy owning a portion of Somerville’s isn’t the issue. The issue is the job I’ve been presented with and the decision I ultimately have to make. “Did he not tell you?” she now asks. “No, he didn’t, but…” I can’t finish my thought. Telling Lauren that this isn’t what this is about feels awkward and weird. I wanted it to be about Tommy and the vineyard and him keeping it from me to make this whole decision easier on myself. “I got offered a job,” I blurt out and Lauren’s mouth falls open a little. “Okay,” she says, trying not to let her shock cloud her judgment. “Where?” “Washington. They want me to run their winery and vineyard and fuck, Lauren, they want to pay me a ridiculous amount of money.” With each word the tears start up again. “I’m sorry.” “Why are you sorry? That’s amazing news. It also makes me feel pretty damn good too,” she says, laughing. “It means I’ve done an awesome job training you if someone wants you to run their whole…” she stops, not finishing her thought. “Oh, that’s why you asked about Tommy.” She pulls a hand through her long blonde hair, tossing her hair over to the other side of her head. “He’ll go with you,” she announces with finality as if it isn’t even something to be questioned. “But what if I don’t want to go?” I ask, posing the question to myself more than to her. “Then don’t,” she says, as if it’s that simple, my head spinning with all the whatif scenarios. “Penny, he loves you, he truly does, so take any doubts about that off the table,” she says, her words cutting through and making me smile a little at the thought of Tommy being in love with me. “Somerville’s will always be here for you, so if you leave and it doesn’t work out, you can come back here, no questions asked. We’re a family here and you’re part of our family.”

“You’re not making this any easier, Lauren,” I wail, my head falling onto her shoulder. “I want to stay. I want to stay with Tommy, but does that make me weak?” “Did it make Jack weak?” she asks, posing the same question back to me. “He’s the one who left his job in Australia to make a life here with me.” “No,” I reply, sounding affronted. “You guys are like an epic love story.” “Maybe you and Tommy are an equally epic love story?” “You think?” The connection we have is intense and I’ve questioned it myself. I’ve never felt this way about someone and something about it scares me a little. He’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of and why the hell would I walk away from that? My life here at Somerville’s is better than I could’ve imagined and leaving it all behind could be the biggest mistake of my life. “I don’t think, I know,” she says, smiling at me now. “I stormed out on him and threw a tantrum like a child,” I it, sheepishly. “Oh, I’ve been there,” Lauren says, laughing. “Do you have any idea how many times I got mad at Jack just to have someone to blame for the fact that I couldn’t make a decision?” “Probably about as many times as I’ve embarrassingly blamed Tommy.” I cover my face with my hands, realizing that this decision isn’t Tommy’s fault and being mad at him is only making me feel guilty. “I hate to interrupt this cheesy sisterhood moment we have going on, but tomorrow’s the party for Apple Jacks and I kinda need you to not be mad at Tommy for a just a little bit,” she jokes, smirking. “I’ll be there, Lu,” I tell her. “I wouldn’t miss it for anything.” “And if you want to stay at my place tonight, the extra bedroom is ready for you. Sometimes you just need a break to clear your head.” She shrugs her shoulders and there’s something about her offer that I find appealing.

“I think I will stay over if that’s okay,” I say, a bit of a question hanging on the end of my words. “Of course it’s okay. Can you at least let Tommy know so he isn’t freaking out though? I don’t need two of you a mess at the grand opening.” I pull my phone from my pocket and send him a quick text.

Me: I’m staying at Lauren’s tonight.

His response is immediate and something about it makes my heart ache for him. I’m not trying to be manipulative or make him think he needs to chase me. I really just need some space with my thoughts. If I see him, I’m going to make my decision to stay instantly, because being away from him feels far more difficult than anything.

Tommy: Ok. I love you

Me: I love you

He really is fucking perfect.

Chapter Thirty- Six

Tommy

“Fuck.” I slam my phone down on the kitchen counter, frustrated for so many reasons, the least of which is the job offer Penny got. I mean yeah, I really don’t want her to go, but I’m not that much of an asshole that I’d beg her to stay. No matter how much I might want her to. But it’s the other things that I fucked up. The way she thinks that I kept owning a portion of Somerville’s from her, the way I told her I couldn’t come with her. Of course I could go with her. Owning ten percent of a winery doesn’t mean I need to stay here, especially with Jack around. But what would I do up in Washington? Just because they want Penny to work there, doesn’t mean they’d be interested in me, too. Which means I’d be giving up a job I love and a house I love to move somewhere where I know no one and have nothing. Except the woman I love. But would that be enough? Would we be happy there? Could I be happy leaving this place if it meant I still had Penny. “Fucking hell,” I half shout, walking to the fridge to grab a beer. I never should have let her leave like that. Should’ve stopped her, pulled her into my arms and promised her we’d find a way to make this work. For both of us. Instead, she’d walked out of here angry, convinced I was keeping things from her and that I wouldn’t move so she could take up the opportunity of a lifetime. As I twist off the cap of my beer, throwing it into the sink, I can’t help but think how painfully fucking familiar this all feels. Like a dick punching case of déjà vu. Only what I felt for Caitlyn pales in comparison to how I feel for Pen.

Fuck the thought of losing her over this is like a stabbing knife to the chest, as though someone is slowly carving out my heart and there’s nothing I can do about it. I’m finishing off my beer, halfway to the fridge for another when my front door opens. I stall out, wondering if it’s Pen, back home to sort this out despite her earlier text about staying at Lauren’s. “Honey, I’m home!” comes Jack’s voice. “Shit,” I mutter as I now grab two beers from the fridge. I can only imagine why he’s over here given my girl is currently staying the night at his house. “Hey, Tommy,” he calls as he walks down the corridor to the kitchen. “In here.” Jack walks in, a bottle of whiskey in one hand and a six pack of cider in the other. “Figured you could use these,” he says, holding both hands up. I do the same and Jack smirks as he puts his alcohol on the counter and takes the beer I offer him. “You okay?” he asks, taking a sip. I suck in a breath, letting it out slowly as I contemplate how much I should tell him. I figure he probably knows everything that’s happened tonight given Pen is staying at their place, but that doesn’t mean I necessarily want to talk to him about it. Clearly Jack senses my reluctance as he takes a seat at one of the stools at the kitchen island and says, “If it’s any consolation, she’s pretty upset right now.” I’m sure he means to make me feel better, but his words have the opposite effect, knowing I’ve caused her to feel like this. “Doesn’t exactly help, Jack,” I tell him. Jack takes another sip of his beer as he kicks the stool next to him out and gestures for me to sit. “She’s upset, yes, but she’s upset because she doesn’t

know what to do. She knows this is a good offer, but she also knows she has a really good thing with you. She wants to make both things work.” “She should take the job,” I say, sitting down. “It’s a really fucking good offer.” “It is,” Jack says, tipping his head in acknowledgement. “But she’s also got a really good thing going on with you.” I give him a sideways glance that makes him laugh. “What?” I shake my head as I take another sip of beer. “I didn’t realize you were such a sentimental guy.” Jack laughs even harder. “Seriously? I’m the most sentimental guy you’ll ever meet.” I can’t stop the eyeroll. “Actually, you’re the biggest smart ass I’ve ever met.” “Well, that too,” he replies with a smile. “But seriously, Tommy, tell me what’s going on. What happened tonight?” I finish off my beer, too lazy to walk to the fridge for another as I reach over and grab a bottle of cider from the six pack Jack brought over. I’m already feeling the slight buzz of a couple of beers on an empty stomach and to be honest, getting drunk seems like the smartest thing to do right now. Anything to dull this pain I’m feeling. “Tom,” Jack prompts, suddenly serious as he too reaches for a cider. I shake my head, muttering fuck it as I figure I’ve got nothing to lose at this point. “Pen got offered this amazing opportunity,” I start, sucking back half of my cider in one go. “Running a well-known winery and being paid a shit load of cash to do it. She deserves it, she truly does, but it’s in Washington, so you know.” I pause, offering a shrug as if to elaborate. “I can’t ask her to stay, no matter how much she might want me to.” Jack takes a sip of his cider as he contemplates my words. “Well, I mean you

could ask her to stay,” he starts, holding up a hand when he sees me start to talk. “Or you could also go with her.” “It’s not that simple.” “Why?” he asks. “You love her, right?” “Yeah,” I say, exhaling. “So fucking much.” “Okay,” Jack says with a nod. “Stay or go, but either way, do it together.” I finish my cider, immediately reaching for another. “I can’t ask her to give this up for me,” I explain. “It’s too good, too much.” “Okay,” Jack says, also reaching for another drink. “So why don’t you go with her?” My eyes close as my brain replays all of the excuses I’ve come up with for why I can’t do that either. Even now, they sound lame as fuck, like I’m running from something, or trying to find a reason for something that should be so simple. “You feel tied to this place,” he says, when it’s obvious I don’t have a reason for why I can go. I shrug. “Yes and no,” I say, scrubbing a hand down my face. “I’ve worked here for most of my life, Jack. This place is my home, Lauren and Ellen are like family to me, it’s not…it’s just…” I trail off, unsure how to explain it. “Okay, first up,” Jack says, turning to me with a smirk, “am I not also your family?” I let out a long exhale, fighting a smile as I answer, “Yes, you are.” “Good,” he says with a satisfied nod. “Secondly, this place will always be your home, Tommy. That’s not gonna change, just because you leave.” “I know,” I it. “It’s just that…” I pause, not really sure what I’m even trying to say right now. I know that I could leave, and I know Lauren and Ellen wouldn’t hate me for doing that. But there’s a part of me that worries that if I do leave and things don’t work out, that somehow Pen will blame me for it.

Eventually, I give up trying to work out how to explain it as I turn to Jack and ask, “Did you ever second guess your decision to leave Australia and move here?” “Nope,” he immediately replies. “Seriously?” “Seriously,” Jack repeats, turning to face me. “As young as we were, I’d never forgotten about Lu. When Ellen got in with me and offered me an opportunity to come back here, I always thought it was my second chance, a sign or whatever. I mean I had no idea if Lu was even here, or if she’d me, but I knew I’d be stupid to up an opportunity to find out. To see if I could find her and maybe have a crack at getting her to fall in love with me.” I let out a half laugh. “I’d say you succeeded at that.” Jack smiles as he nods in agreement. “It wasn’t always easy though,” he its. “And in some ways, the hardest part was after.” “What do you mean?” Jack finishes off his cider and stands, wandering around to the other side of the kitchen island as he starts randomly opening cupboards. When he finds the one with glasses, he grabs two before moving toward the freezer. I watch as he helps himself to some ice, before moving back to the counter and pouring us both a generous shot of whiskey and sliding a glass toward me. I tip my head in thanks, but don’t say anything as I wait for him to answer my question. Eventually, he sits back down beside me, sighing as he swallows a mouthful of liquid. “Lu felt guilty about what she thought I was giving up,” he says, not looking at me. “She worried I’d regret leaving my home and my family, my job and my friends.” “Do you?” Jack turns to me, a small smile on his face. “Not one single day, Tommy. You know why? Because my home and my family is with Lu. Leaving Oz and

coming here was not a difficult decision for me.” “So you think I should go?” I ask, confused. Jack shrugs as he lifts his glass. “I think you shouldn’t dismiss it as an option.” I exhale. “Fuck man, you’re not really helping me here.” He laughs, slapping me on the back. “Only you can make this decision, Tommy. I think you know what you need to do, you’re just afraid of doing it.” “I don’t know.” “Sure you do,” he says, standing as he reaches for the bottle. “Come on.” I look up at him, confused. “Where?” Jack laughs. “I think we need to get you a little more drunk.” “We do?” “Yep,” he says, turning and walking out of the kitchen. “Not too much though, ‘cause we have a big opening tomorrow night, but a little bit, yeah.”

The next morning, I wake up with a sore head and a mouth that feels like a dumpster. Beside me, the bed is empty, the cold sheets a reminder that Pen didn’t come home last night. I knew she wasn’t going to, but it doesn’t make the reality any less painful, as though her absence is a reminder of every morning I’m set to face if I fuck up this whole job offer thing with her. Groaning, I roll over, burying my face in her pillow, wishing to fuck I knew how to fix this. As much as Jack had tried to help, all he’d done was confuse me even more. The only thing I do know is that I want to be with Penny and deep down, a part of me knows that likely means I need to go with her. “Rise and shine, sunshine.”

The sound of a banging noise has me groaning again, especially as it gets louder and louder. I bury my head under her pillow just as my bedroom door opens. “Time to wake up,” comes Jack’s voice. He sounds far too awake and so not hungover considering how much we drank last night. I don’t even offering to let him stay, although it makes sense given I can barely even coming to bed. “Fuck off,” I mumble from beneath the pillow when the banging noise starts again. Jack laughs, prodding me in the side with something. “Come on, get up, I’m making you the perfect hangover cure.” “Seriously,” I say, throwing the pillow from my face in what I hope is his general direction. “How the hell are you this cheerful?” He’s standing beside my bed, dressed in the same jeans and t-shirt he was wearing last night, a saucepan in one hand and a wooden spoon in the other. Explains the banging noise. “God, you’re a barrel of laughs this morning, aren’t you?” “Your fault,” I mumble. “How much did we drink last night?” “A lot,” Jack replies, grinning. “Difference is, I’m Australian so I can handle my booze better than you.” It’s too painful to even roll my eyes and instead I throw an arm across them as I say, “I need some more sleep.” “No,” he says, poking me again with the wooden spoon. “You need to get up. We have shit to do today and I need you to be a functioning adult.” “Ugh, fuck me,” I groan, throwing off the covers. “No thanks,” Jack says with a laugh. “I prefer to fuck my wife.” I stumble from bed, wondering if I’m maybe still a little drunk as Jack claps me on the shoulder, steadying me a little.

“Go take a shower,” he says, pushing me toward the bathroom. “I’ve got coffee brewing and bacon and eggs cooking.” Despite how hungover I feel, the idea of coffee and food actually sounds good. As I make my way to the shower though, I my phone, sitting on the dresser. I reach for it, hoping to fuck that there’s a message from Penny telling me last night was all just a bad dream or a misunderstanding or something. But when I lift the phone, there are no messages. No missed calls and no texts from her. There’s nothing at all and I can’t help but wonder if this is a sign that I’ve already lost her.

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Penny

It’s late when I wake up the next morning, at least later than normal and I can hear Lauren moving around in her kitchen. I slept better than expected when I finally did fall asleep. My thoughts were consumed with worrying about Tommy alone at our house and wondering if I’d walked out on him, on us. That’s the last thing I want him to think and I hope he knows I would never leave him for good. Even if I do take the job in Washington, even if we have to do the whole long-distance thing, I’m still all in. I climb from the bed and pull on the leggings I was wearing yesterday along with the t-shirt I slept in. I never went home last night, but I’m going to need to today. The thought of going home to our house, knowing I left him alone there makes my heart shatter into a million pieces. I’d be devastated if he had done that to me. I’m so fucking selfish. I stumble out of Lauren’s extra bedroom, still a little tired, but still completely wrecked because I can’t make a damn decision. She’s standing in the kitchen looking a little worse for the wear too. Her eyes are bloodshot like she spent last night on a bender, but given we didn’t drink at all, I know that’s not the case. She yawns, her mouth opening wide, her eyes falling closed as she stretches her arms above her head. “You okay?” I ask, my words sympathetic. “Yeah, I think so. I’m just so damn tired and you’re never going to believe this,” she says, stopping for a second to take a drink of her coffee, “I puked.” “You puked?” “Yeah. I got up, walked into the bathroom and instead of going pee, I threw up,” she explains, sounding totally confused. “I think I ate something bad or maybe

it’s just exhaustion from trying to get this business up and running.” “You and Jack have been working day and night. You’re probably just run ragged,” I say, knowing the feeling. Between all this work and now the stress over deciding what I’m going to do, I feel like I might puke too. “Have you made a decision?” she asks quietly, her forehead creased with concern. “No,” I wail, covering my face with my hands. “Let’s talk about something else,” I mumble through my fingers. “Okay, I have an architect coming to meet with me in an hour. Why I scheduled it for today is beyond me. I swear I think Jack is going to murder me in my sleep if I schedule one more thing during the grand opening week.” “An architect, huh? Fill me in. What’s going on?” I ask, prodding a little and enjoying the fact that our conversation isn’t dominated by what the hell I’m going to do. With the cider house already finished and the restaurants and the tasting rooms remodeled recently, I can’t imagine what else could need to be done. This place is this gorgeous amount of rustic and modern that fits perfectly with Jack and Lauren; it’s like a goddamned postcard. “We’re tearing down the old cottage next door and Jack and I are adding onto this place. Eventually we want to have kids and moving off the vineyard isn’t something either of us want, so…” she shrugs, looking around. Lauren’s little cottage is beautiful just like everything else on the vineyard and I know it’s the house she grew up in and the place where she fell in love with Jack, so leaving isn’t an option. “When I lived here as a kid it had three bedrooms and then Will and Ellen renovated it, so it had an ensuite, but that doesn’t really make it conducive for a family.” “But you don’t want to leave, so why not add on. It’s going to be amazing,” I tell her, thinking about Tommy’s beautiful, perfect house on the vineyard and how much I love it, how much I love it here.

How much I love him. Lauren keeps talking and I feel like an asshole, but I don’t hear a word she says, my focus is now on exactly what I need to do. “I’m sorry, Lu, but I gotta go,” I announce, interrupting her, but the smile on her face says she understands. “What did you decide?” she calls after me as I run out her front door with my shoes in my hands. “I think I better tell Tommy first,” I yell over my shoulder, dodging the rutted terrain as I run shoeless toward the path that leads to mine and Tommy’s house. I fling open the front door, tracking my dirty feet all through the house as I yell for Tommy but get no response. I should’ve known he wouldn’t be here. He’s doing what takes his mind off of shit. He’s working. He’s somewhere on this massive plot of land and now I have to find his broken-hearted ass. There’s no way I’m texting him, because he’ll panic and ruin the moment. I whip my hair into a bun and climb in the shower, needing to at least wash my dirty feet before I hit him with my decision.

Twenty minutes later, I’m showered, dressed and ready to trek across the vineyard once again, but this time, I’m so confident in my decision all I want to do is find him. There are only a few places he could be and luckily for me they are in close proximity to each other. I start with the cider house and only find a couple of the other maintenance guys adding the few final touches on things. I don’t even bother saying anything to them when I realize Tommy isn’t there. Each step I take that brings me closer to him, the harder my heart races, thumping hard and fast in my chest. There isn’t any hesitation in what I’m doing

now, not even an ounce of doubt crawling through my mind. I hate that there ever was. I hate that I made him doubt me. I check a few of the small sheds that are adjacent to the cider house and find those all set up and ready. Almost every space on the property around the orchard is being used tonight and the last place I need to check is the barn where weddings are held. It’s where the food will be served and where Jack and Lauren will thank everyone for coming. I couldn’t think of a better place to find Tommy and tell him. I stop in the oversized doorway to the barn, the thirty-foot ceiling is strung with thousands of twinkling lights and backed against the old worn-out wooden beams; it’s a striking contrast. But even more striking is that the room is empty. I was certain this is where he would be and the defeat makes my shoulders sag, my entire body practically giving up. “Hey, Tommy! Your girl’s out here,” I hear someone say and I look up to find Dylan standing at the other end of the barn. “Stop fucking with me, you dick,” Tommy yells back and I bite down on my lip to keep myself from laughing. He’s back to being his miserable grumpy self like he was before we hooked up and I know exactly how to fix that. “Dude, I’m serious,” Dylan calls, just as Tommy emerges from the small room that’s used for storage. He stops dead in his tracks and just looks at me. He looks at me with worry and fear and hurt, but underneath it all, behind every worried crease on his face, I see love and I see my future with him. He begins to walk toward me, but I can’t wait, I run to him, throwing myself into his arms, nearly knocking him down with the force of my body when we collide. “I’m not going anywhere,” I announce, my lips crashing against his in desperation. My hands tangle in his hair, pulling him closer to me, my mouth smiling against his. “I was going to tell you I was coming with you,” he murmurs with the softest of

words, his lips brushing mine. What he says brings tears to my eyes, pooling and spilling over with everything he’s just said to me. I understand what he’d be giving up and what that would mean, but I also understand that him leaving means he chose me. He chose me over everything he’s ever known and called home. “No,” I say, pulling back and shaking my head. “This is where we belong. This is our home, and I can’t ever picture us anywhere else. We met here. We fell in love here and I want to raise our babies here with you. Always you.” “Penny,” he says, cupping my face with his hands. “I love you so fucking much.” “I know you do,” I tease, “and the feeling is mutual.” Again, our lips connect with a kiss that’s forgiveness and forever, and I can’t imagine a more perfect way to start the rest of my life with Tommy Andrews. “Fuck my life,” Dylan mutters, moving past us and closer to the exit. “I’ve gotta find a new job because I can’t be here with all you love-sick assholes.” My head falls back as I laugh and Tommy sees this as an opportunity and begins sucking on my neck, making Dylan even more uncomfortable than he already is. “Are you trying to make me puke?” he now asks, clearly done with our make up make out session. “Sorry, sorry,” I say, trying to appease Dylan so he doesn’t run off hating us. “We’ll finish this at home,” I now whisper in Tommy’s ear. “I missed you and your…” And just as I’m about to finish my thought, Lauren walks in with Jack and a stunning dark-haired beauty. This must be the architect and shame on me for thinking it was going to be a man and that architects can’t possibly look like this woman standing in front of us. I pictured nerdy and balding and fat, not this small stunner of a woman with the most perfect upturned nose and full lips. She walks with an air of confidence and the way she’s dressed conveys the same.

But as we’re standing here, waiting for an introduction, I see a change in her and the once confident woman is suddenly replaced by an unmistakable vulnerability, a nervousness that es between two people. I look from her to where her eyes have settled and holy shit, she’s looking at Dylan. She knows Dylan and not just knows him. She knows him…intimately. I throw a soft elbow into Tommy’s side as he unknowingly misses the cues happening right in front of his face. “What?” he asks, grabbing my elbow before I jab him again. “Nothing. Why?” I ask, playing it casual so I don’t alert everyone to the elephant in the room. Changing the subject, I greet the woman. “Hi, I’m Penny. I run the tasting room here at Somerville’s. You must be the architect Lauren hired.” Out of the corner of my eye I catch Dylan’s stiff body relaxing slightly as if he’s grateful for the distraction. “Yes,” Lauren says, smiling. “This is Tessa. She’s going to be working with Jack and me on the renovation and addition we’re putting on the cottage. We thought it would be nice to have her walk around the property and get some ideas of how she can seamlessly incorporate the cottage and property.” I’m certain no one has heard a word Lauren has said because the space between all of us is swirling with far more tension than was here just moments ago when Tommy didn’t know whether I was staying or going. “Right?” Lauren adds and Tessa quickly nods, her mouth set in a firm line and her hazel eyes widen a little when Lauren starts to introduce her around. “This is Tommy and Dylan, they run maintenance around here.” Tommy reaches out and shakes her hand, but Dylan stupidly stands there, awkward and weird, and when I clear my throat, he finally says something. “We already know each other,” he mutters, and I swallow back the laugh that feels like it’s forcing its way out of my throat. This couldn’t be more uncomfortable. “Oh my god, seriously?” Lauren says, oblivious to all of this or maybe it’s just

because Dylan confided in me about a certain girl, and I’m positive this is that girl. “Well, it was nice to meet you Tessa, but Tommy and I have a few more things to take care of,” I interrupt, not wanting to wait here to see how this all plays out. I grab hold of Tommy’s wrist and give him a little tug, pulling him in the direction of the exit. “What the hell was that?” he asks once we’re out of earshot. “That’s the girl Dylan was clearly sleeping with,” I tell him, dumbfounded by his complete lack of observation. “You think?” “Yes, Clueless, but I don’t care about them. I care about getting you home and celebrating. When we hit our front door, your clothes better be off,” I say, running my hand up under his t-shirt. And before I can react, Tommy tosses me over his shoulder, slapping my ass, as he jogs toward our house.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Tommy

“Hmmm, okay fighting sucks, but make up sex really is awesome,” Penny murmurs, rolling into my side, her face buried in my neck. I chuckle, pulling her so she’s lying on top of me. “That wasn’t a fight, babe,” I tell her, my hands slipping down to her ass. “But it sure was great sex.” She giggles, pinching my side as she asks, “It wasn’t?” “No,” I murmur, leaning up to kiss her. “That was us having an adult moment.” Penny bursts out laughing at my comment. “An adult moment?” she murmurs. I brush the hair back from her face, my eyes meeting hers. “You sure you really don’t want to take the job?” I ask again. “Because I will go with you.” Her laughter stops, a big smile on her face as she looks down at me. “I’m absolutely positive,” she says, her hand cupping my cheek. “This is our home and there is nowhere else I’d rather be.” I swallow hard, both relieved and grateful. “And you’re serious about having babies with me one day?” I ask. She chuckles, leaning down to suck on my ear lobe as she whispers, “I am, yeah, but maybe in a year or so? I kinda want you all to myself for a bit.” I grin, squeezing her ass before I roll us over. “I can live with that,” I say, nudging her legs apart, my dick already hard and wanting more of her. “But it doesn’t mean we can’t get lots of practice in in the meantime.” “Tommy,” she moans as I slide inside her. “The opening, we need to…” “Shhh, we have time,” I murmur as I slowly thrust, burying myself inside her. “Ohhh…” she breathes out. “I don’t think we do.”

She’s probably right, but right now, I don’t give a fuck, too consumed by this woman who has just given me everything I’ve ever wanted. “We’ll get there,” I say, hitching her leg higher as I slide deeper and silence any more words with a deep kiss.

“Oh well, it’s about time you two showed up,” comes Jack’s voice as we wander into the now finished cider house. “I hope you showered after your little afternoon sexfest?” I roll my eyes even though I’m grinning like an idiot. “Fuck off,” I tease. “What do you need us to do?” Jack laughs, slipping his arm around Lauren’s shoulder as he pulls her close. “Nothing, just enjoy the night.” “It looks amazing in here,” Penny says, her eyes wide as she looks around the huge room. The lights on the oversized chandelier are on but all turned down low, with lit candles burning on the tables and shelves around the room, creating a warm, welcoming glow. Soft music plays as the staff gets glasses ready and plates of food set up. Outside, the fire pit burns, the outdoor seating area lit up by the fairy lights and more candles. “Yeah, it really does,” I say. “We couldn’t have done any of this without you guys, so thank you, seriously,” Jack says to both of us. “I agree,” Lauren seconds. “You guys have done so much for us and we want you to know that whatever happens, we are both so grateful.” “Well,” Penny says, wrapping both arms around my waist as she leans her head on my shoulder. “We love it here and we just want to let you know that we’re both staying because I’m not taking the job.” “Wait, seriously?” Lauren asks, her eyes wide.

“Seriously,” Pen says with a smile. “I mean it’s, but…you…it’s…” Penny laughs. “This is our home, Lauren. I know it’s your family vineyard and Jack’s cider house, but it’s still home to Tommy and me.” Lauren smiles, her eyes shining with unshed tears. “Actually, it is part yours, ?” she says, glancing at me. “Part ours,” I reply, squeezing Penny’s shoulder. “You should put that ten percent in both our names.” Lauren nods at me, her smile widening in approval as Pen turns to look up at me. “Seriously?” she whispers. “Seriously,” I repeat. “I love you, Pen and I meant it when I said what’s mine is yours. I was never hiding this from you.” She pushes up on her toes to press a hard kiss to my mouth. “I love you.” I smile against her lips. “I love you too.” “Okay, enough with the sappy shit,” Jack says, clapping a hand on my shoulder. “Let’s go get a drink and get this party started.” We all wander over to the bar and grab some drinks just as Ellen and Will walk in with Tessa, the architect we all met this afternoon, tagging along behind them. “Tessa, hi!” Lauren shouts, throwing her arms around her in a hug as though they are lifelong friends. “You really think she and Dylan hooked up?” I whisper, leaning down to put my mouth to Pen’s ear. She giggles, pinching my side as she presses herself against me. “You boys are so clueless, look at him,” she adds, subtly pointing to the other end of the bar area. I look up and see Dylan, standing alone, his eyes glued to Tessa who seems

unaware of the fact that he’s staring at her. His mouth is hanging open a little, as though he’s dumbstruck by the sight of her. “See what I mean?” Pen whispers. “Yeah,” I say, glancing at Tessa. “I think you might be right. But I mean…how?” Pen leans closer, her mouth at my ear. “I think they were fuck buddies but she wanted more. After she bailed, he realized he wanted more too.” “Dumbass,” I mutter. “Um,” Penny says, biting my ear lobe. “Do I need to remind you of how you weren’t so sure ?” I slip my hand down to her ass, squeezing it as I turn and press my mouth against hers. “Absolutely not,” I tell her. “That was stupid me back then. Now, I’m all in, one hundred percent.” “Good answer,” she says, smiling against my mouth. “When can we get the fuck out of here?” I ask, brushing my lips against hers. Pen sucks my bottom lip, gently biting it as she says, “We literally just got here, Tommy. Patience, baby.” “Ugh,” I groan. “I don’t have any when it comes to you.” Penny laughs, her head falling back a little. “You’re hopeless.”

We do stay in the end, enjoying the party as the small, invited group of people all come to celebrate the opening of Apple Jacks. The night goes off without a hitch and it’s clear the new cider range Jack has created is going to be a huge hit. “We’ll be doing this for your mead soon,” Lauren says as she comes to stand beside us. “Maybe,” I say with a laugh. “We’re only just starting, ?”

She takes a sip of her drink. “Nah, you guys will nail it. We’ve already tried it. Plus have you seen how many followers you already have on Instagram?” Penny laughs. “It doesn’t count when you strong arm all your friends and clients into following us, you know.” Lauren shrugs, smiling as she says, “I’m just ing something I believe in.” “Thank you,” Pen says, throwing her arms around Lauren in a hug. “Are you at least feeling better after this morning?” Lauren shrugs as she takes another sip of her drink. “Yeah, mostly, Ellen thinks I’m probably pregnant, but I don’t know, I’m not—” “Wait, what, pregnant?” Pen half shouts, an excited look on her face. “Have you taken a test?” Lauren laughs. “No, not yet. I might do it tomorrow after the party,” she adds, holding up her drink. “Gotta enjoy this first.” She winks at both of us before walking away to find Jack. “Oh my god,” Penny breathes out. “That drink looked an awful lot like the non-alcoholic cider Jack made,” I say, watching as Lauren cuddles up to Jack, who wraps a protective arm around her. “You think?” she asks. I roll my eyes, grinning as I gesture toward them. “Yes, Clueless,” I say, repeating her words back to her. “My bet is, she already knows she’s pregnant.” “Oh my god, that’s so amazing,” Penny says, clearly excited. Her reaction makes my heart flip, seeing her this happy about our friend’s baby news. I can’t wait to see the look on her face the day we find out we’re having a baby. “Wanna get out of here?” I whisper. “Go get some more practice in?” Pen turns to look up at me, her eyes filled with lust. “Yes.” We say our goodbyes, before heading out of Apple Jacks and walking back

toward our home. The walk takes us past the lake that is now filled with some seriously dirty memories and as we come up to the path, Penny squeezes my hand and says, “Can we sit out here for a minute?” Grinning, I lift our ed hands to my lips. “You sure we’re just gonna sit?” She swats at my chest. “Yes, there are far too many people around for that!” Laughing, I lead us down the path to her pond. “Well, you might just have to try being quiet then.” Penny tugs on my hand, pulling me down to the grass. She moves so she’s straddling me, my smile widening as I slip my hands around to her ass. “Behave,” she warns. “No fucking chance, babe,” I reply, slipping my hands underneath her skirt. She gasps when my fingers slide beneath her panties, teasing her as I move between her legs. “Tommy, wait,” she says, breathless. Leaning in, I start to suck and kiss her neck. “Why am I waiting?” I murmur. “Shit…” she groans, her arms slipping around my neck as she arches back a little. “I need to ask you something.” I slip a finger inside her, groaning when I discover how wet she is. “Uh huh, what?” “Tommy,” she breathes out, her fingers tightening against my neck. “No, stop, wait, I…” She pulls back a little, her hooded eyes finding mine in the darkness. “What’s wrong, babe?” I ask, slowly sliding my finger out before slipping it back in. Penny groans again, clearly distracted by what I’m doing to her. I lean in and kiss her neck again just as she blurts out. “Marry me?” I freeze, not sure if I’ve heard her right. “What?” I ask, lifting my head. “Will you marry me?”

My mouth curves into a slow smile as I slam my mouth against hers in a hard kiss. “Yes, I’ll fucking marry you. Are you kidding me?” “Really?” “Babe,” I say, pulling back, suddenly serious. “I’ve wanted to ask since day one. I just didn’t want to rush you. But yes, I have never been more serious about anything or anyone in my life. I would love to marry you, Penny Cartwright.” Pen smiles, kissing the end of my nose. “I would love to marry you, Tommy Andrews.” “Good, then let’s go home so I can give you your ring and then get in your pants.” “Wait, what, you have a ring?” Pen asks as I ease her off my lap. I laugh. “Yes, Pen, I do.” Then I sling her over my shoulder and take us both home.

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Penny

Two Months Later

It was a risk asking him to marry me, a risk that most men would’ve looked at as controlling or even weird, but not Tommy. His agreement of yes fell from his lips faster than I could’ve ever imagined, looking back at where we started and how he fought this obvious connection between the two of us. But what happened in the past doesn’t matter and it certainly doesn’t matter now as we stand under the willow tree covered in millions of tiny twinkling lights. It isn’t a big wedding, hell, it isn’t even a wedding. It’s just us and a few friends standing here, watching us make this official. It’s exactly how we wanted it with the vineyard bathed in the quietness of dusk, the lake as the backdrop to what will be forever. There was nothing to plan, no catering to organize, no dress to be altered or a guest list to stress over, no money to be spent or families to disappoint. It’s simple and beautiful and despite it not being very long since we met, it’s exactly where we’re supposed to be. Today was the day we hung the sign out front, right under the Somerville name and right next to the Apple Jacks sign. P,T and Bee are officially in business and are currently being sold, tasted and enjoyed all over the Somerville property. But that doesn’t mean we’ve left our old jobs behind. It just means we are hella fucking busy and we love it. We have something that is ours, something our little family helped us build and something we will forever be a part of. And not a day goes by that I’m not one hundred percent certain I made the right decision by staying here. The officiant stands in front of us, his words nearly lost on both of us as we can’t

take our eyes off each other. “Do you Penelope, take Thomas, to be your husband, to cherish in love and in friendship, in strength and in weakness, in success and in disappointment, to love him faithfully, today, tomorrow, and for as long as the two of you shall live?” the officiant asks, and I can’t seem to wipe this giddy schoolgirl grin off my face. “I do,” I reply, my hand resting on Tommy’s cheek as he smiles back at me, his eyes shining with the slightest hint of tears. “Do you Thomas, take Penelope, to be your wife, to cherish in love and in friendship, in strength and in weakness, in success and in disappointment, to love her faithfully, today, tomorrow, and for as long as the two of you shall live?” “I do,” Tommy says, leaning in close, his lips nearly touching mine and it’s hard to stop the giggle that slips through. He’s so naughty, teasing me with what he knows I want. He trails his mouth across my cheek and to my ear as he whispers, “He left out the part about making you come on a daily basis, but don’t worry, that’s in there too.” “It’s in there for you, too,” I whisper back, not giving a shit if the officiant has told us to kiss or not. I press my lips to his, feeling Tommy’s mouth curl into a smile against mine. “Hey!” Jack calls out. “I’m pretty sure you need to wait—” “Since they already byed my line,” the officiant jokes, “I now pronounce you legally wed, so keep on kissing.” Our little group erupts in applause and laughter, Oscar and Olivia tossing the little bags of bird seed we gave them and jumping around just like I expected them to. And as I look around and see our friends, the beautiful property, my amazing husband standing in front of me, I feel the tears start to fall. Somehow this became my life. “I love you, Pen,” Tommy says, scooping me up in his arms, lifting me off the ground as he kisses me once again.

“I love you too.”

We gather everyone in the cider house for our little reception, grateful to Lauren and Jack for shutting the place down early so we could celebrate. We’re surrounded by our friends, the people we love and that we can’t imagine our lives without, and it’s perfection. Tommy and I stand at the front of the room, hand in hand, beaming and radiating so much joy I’m finding it hard to believe we are these people now. In a way it’s quite funny, because if you asked me six months ago if I would ever fall head over heels in love with Tommy Andrews, I’d have laughed my ass off. Surly, off limits, but oh so sexy and hot was kind of my jam, but I had no idea that underneath I’d find a man with so much to offer. “We just want to thank everyone for being here today,” Tommy starts, but falls short of continuing. He’s a little nervous and it’s so damn cute. “Yes, thank you so much for being here to celebrate with us. This isn’t only a celebration of our marriage but also of Lauren, Jack, and Ellen helping us launch our business. We couldn’t have done it without everyone in this room,” I say, now holding up the glass of champagne one of the waitstaff brought over to me. “So, here’s to new adventures, new and old friends and falling in love.” Again, the applause starts up, and Tommy leans in to kiss me as I take his hand in mine. “Come on. We gotta make the rounds,” I tease, pushing him away a little as he gets all grabby, his hand squeezing my ass. “But this silky dress makes it feel like you’re not wearing underwear and it’s fucking hot,” he murmurers, biting at my neck now. “That’s because I’m not.” I wink at him, walking away and leaving his mouth on the floor as he watches my ass sway. My first stop is Jack and Lauren, who are literally making out like teenagers when I stroll up on them.

“Hey, guys,” I say, bumping Lauren with my hip. “Yay!” she screams, throwing her arms around my neck. “I’m so happy for you. Now you’re never leaving,” she jokes. She pushes up on her toes to kiss Tommy on the cheek and Jack gives both of us a hug. “Now you know you have me to thank for this, right?” Jack says, hitting us with open arms like we owe him. Lauren swats at him, shaking her head and rolling her eyes. “Jack, just shush. Let them enjoy their night.” “Fine, fine. Congratulations on getting hitched and getting hitched to this place. It will be the best decision you’ve ever made.” I couldn’t agree more with him. We meet up with Ellen and Will next, hugging and laughing as Oscar and Olivia run around the place like maniacs. “It’s only a matter of time before this place is overrun by kids and we’re all out numbered,” Will teases, hooking an arm around Olivia’s waist and scooping her up as she tries to run by him. She’s laughing hysterically and Oscar has now intervened trying to free her. Eventually Will sets her down and she throws her arms around my waist, hugging me tightly. “You look beautiful,” she says, looking up at me with those big brown eyes. “When are you going to have a baby like Aunt Lauren?” “Olivia!” Ellen calls out, embarrassed by her daughter’s well-known boldness. “It’s rude to ask people that.” “Sorry,” she yells, running off again. “So, Lu is pregnant, huh?” I say, giving Ellen a sly smile. “She is, but she didn’t want it to overshadow your day so she’s keeping it quiet just a little longer,” Ellen its, holding a finger to her lips and smirking. “Secret’s safe with us.”

We make our way around the entire room, and even though it’s only a few people we work with at Somerville’s and our friends, it takes us a while. We eventually finish with our last stop…Dylan and Tessa. She’s been around the property a lot since Lauren hired her, so much so that she kind of fits right in. But where she doesn’t seem to quite fit is with Dylan. How he managed to convince this beautiful woman to climb into his bed is beyond me. “How’s it going, man?” Dylan asks as we walk up. “Pretty fucking good,” Tommy announces, sliding his arm around my waist, possessively pulling me closer to him. He’s such an idiot sometimes, still thinking Dylan is interested in me. “Congratulations,” Tessa says, smiling as she leans in to give us both a hug. “It was a beautiful night for a wedding. And I’m so glad I was able to work with both of you on getting that shed up to par for your mead making business.” We took one of the old sheds on the property and with Tessa’s help and expertise, we were able to turn it into an additional tasting room that fits in perfectly with everything else here. It’s off a distance from some of the other buildings, but Lauren and Jack are now renting it out for private tastings and parties, and when it’s not being used for that, we hold reservation-only and small group mead tastings in it. “We’re glad you were able to help us too,” I say, looking from her to Dylan, still wondering what exactly is going on, but even I’m not that bold to come right out and ask them, especially here. We make some more small talk, thanking both of them for coming before it feels like neither of us have had a chance to breathe let alone sit down. The night has been more than I ever expected, and I’m exhausted and elated, and it all feels like a dream. A wonderful, beautiful, perfect dream, but somehow, this is now my life, our life. “How about we call it a night and I take you home and see what you’re not wearing under this dress?” Tommy croons, his hands sliding over my ass.

“Sounds like a plan.” And with that, we quietly leave our guests to start the rest of our lives together.

What’s Next

Have you met our Hawthorn Hills crew yet? We’d love for you to check them out and enjoy all the new adult romance goodness! Find it here!

Complicate Me: Reid and Sienna Book One

Life at its simplest is still complicated.

Reid Bowen is her brother’s best friend and the biggest womanizer on campus. She has no business wanting him.

Sienna Parker is forbidden and the sweetest fruit he can never taste. But if he can’t have her, no one can.

Forced together by a road trip home, it will not only test their patience, but also their resolve to stay away from each other.

Bound by their past, it’s the complicated that changes their lives.

Your Free Books are Waiting!

Did you love reading about the Hawthorn Hills crew? OMG, you did!!?? We’re thrilled and we want to say thank you by offering you even more! This FREE prequel gives you a glimpse into early lives of Sienna, Caleb and Reid and takes place before the events of Complicate Me (Book One).

Grab your FREE copy of Confuse Me right here!

And, because one freebie is never enough, we are also excited to offer you a FREE prequel of our Rockport Beach Series! This FREE prequel gives you a glimpse into the early lives of Beck & Kelsey and takes place before the events of Coming Home to You (Book One).

Grab your FREE copy of Beginning with You, click here!

Happy reading and thank you!

Books by Claire Raye

The Rockport Beach Series Coming Home to You: Book One Finding Home with You: Book Two Making Home with You: Book Three Rockport Beach: The Complete Series The Love and Wine Series Always Yours: Book One Finally Yours: Book Two Maybe Yours: Book Three

The Dirty Hollywood Series Beautiful Secret: Book One Beautiful Trouble: Book Two Beautiful Lie: Book Three

Cocky Hero World Pin-Up Pilot

Hawthorn Hills Duet Series Complicate Me: Book One Complete Me: Book Two Ruin Me: Book Three Rescue Me: Book Four Tempt Me: Book Five Trust Me: Six

About the Author

Not only is Claire Raye a really sweet pen name, it’s actually a pen name for two sarcastic best friends who met through their mutual love of reading. After bonding over books (and wine and cheese), they decided to take the plunge and see if they could write a book together and ta dah... The Rockport Beach Series was born! In addition to their shared love of food and dropping an occasional (read, a lot of) f bombs, the writing duo that is Claire Raye like to write about strong, sassy females who aren’t afraid to say what’s on their mind and the overprotective men who fall in love with them.

Both halves of Claire Raye are married and both of their husbands have a cheeky side that gets plenty of airtime in their books. From their smart mouths to their witty one-liners, there’s plenty of material to use for all those alpha males they love to write about.

Plans are already underway for the next series, which is sure to feature plenty of sass, steam and humor, and of course, a happily ever after!

Connect with Us

www.claireraye.com

Like us on Facebook

Follow us on Instagram

Follow us on Goodreads

Follow us on BookBub

Acknowledgments

Once again, a huge thank you to all of our readers! Thank you for buying our books, for leaving us a review and for all of your , it means the world to us!

Thank you also to Lindee Robinson for the most perfect photos of Tommy and Penny and for Sarah Hansen at Okay Creations for taking the photo and creating this gorgeous cover! It’s absolutely gorgeous. Thank you also to our beta readers and editor, your time and is invaluable.

As always, thanks to our husbands for their love and …and crazy plot ideas or smartass comments.